A.N. — Hey all! just wanted to take a moment and thank you all for reading, i know this fic has taken a lot longer than I initially planned, but i appreciate each and every one of my reviewers and readers! your comments have meant a lot to me ️

This is the final chapter of A Scientific Conundrum, but the series continues with A Scientific Devotion which I'll be posting the first chapter of soon, so be on the look out!

Once again, thank you for reading and I hope you'll enjoy the series still as it continues!


Chapter 32: Robotic Schemes and Epilogues

One after the other, the four penguins slid up to the side of the lair. Skipper glanced around and then back at Kowalski. "You sure this is the right building?"

Kowalski raised a nonexistent brow. "I doubt he's moved office locations since my last time being over, sir."

"Just…Making sure you're not…Covering for him."

"No. I'm going to ask for non lethal measures against him if possible, but as I've said before, he and I are keeping work and relationship separate as possible."

Skipper glanced back at him and then nodded. He watched as the side door opened, a lobster stepping out, before he motioned for his men to move in. One precise kick later, the lobster was dragged off to the bushes and hidden before the four slid into the building.

"Odd, I would have expected more security," Private murmured, looking around.

"I doubt he expected us to come through the front door. It ain't usually our style."

"Mixing it up now and then never hurts." Kowalski shrugged, pressing himself against the wall as they sneaked along.

Suddenly, Rico's eyes grow wide as the wall beneath his flipper pressed down. "Uh oh."

The floor below them then fell open and down they went. Four tubes dropped them into the usual four sets of ankle and flipper cuffs.

"I take it back, he expected it and Kowalski ain't picking how we enter any of his future lairs." Skipper glared in his direction.

"….Yeah, okay, that might be fair."

A diabolical chuckle then came from the shadows as Dr. Blowhole rolled out. "Well, well, well, look who finally decided to be decent house guests. Who would have thought, you do know how to use a front door."

"Can it, you overgrown sardine." Skipper rolled his eyes. "What have you done with Marlene?"

"Oh the otter? She's fine. Comfortable even, I'd say." He looked over his shoulder as a spotlight landed dramatically on Marlene in her unlocked cage where she sipped tea.

"Hey guys." She waved to them. "What took you so long?"

"….Subway was packed, we had to take the next one." Private sighed.

"Gotta love human public transportation, mmm?" The dolphin chuckled as he rolled closer. He then propped his flipper against their cuff-board, leaning his head on his flipper so that he was leaning right over Kowalski's head. "Just think, how much more efficient transportation could be if I ruled the world. First off, there'd be far fewer humans to take up so much space. Their loss is all of our gain, yeah?"

"What? You going to have lobsters drive subways? They wouldn't be able to work the controls." Skipper snorted, shaking his head. "It'd never work."

"Obviously, there would be modifications made, if not a complete overhaul, Skipper. Believe me, my brain is larger than your entire body. I've thought of everything."

Their flat-headed commander rolled his eyes at that. "So what's the scheme this time, or did you just want us to hang around for tea?"

"My, you are good little house guests today. Thank you for asking, Skipper." He reached down and tapped Kowalski's beak tip with his flipper. "You'll enjoy this scheme, Mittens. I had you in mind when I began to plan it." He blinked at him before pushing a button on his Segway, bringing up his large surround sound television.

On screen, Chuck Charles and his crew were screaming, being chased by what looked like were once computers and phones.

"I'm sure you've already seen the news today?" He chuckled. "I must thank you for the ideas. You were right. This type of plan, it's quite effective. Genius really." He then teased a feather on Kowalski's chest. "You know, you could always defect and tag along for this scheme, see how it all plays out, mmm? Let robotics clear the way for a new world order?"

Kowalski looked at him and then at the screen, furrowing his brows. "…Which ideas?"

"Oh, a mixture." He pressed another button on his Segway, bringing up a PowerPoint presentation. "It all began during our first date."

On the screen now was a drawing of Kowalski's nanites as well as an image of the diabologized MP3 player from past schemes.

"You mentioned being inspired by our first accidental creation together to create your nanites. Well, consider this. Diabologized nanites that have been remote programmed?" He chuckled. "Of course, I needed a host electronic for my little robotic sleeper agents, so why not my largest competitor Aepple? Their devices are incredibly bad for the environment, but so many humans love buying their products just because they're expensive. It's amazing what humans will convince themselves is okay as long as they get their newest toys to show off to their friends." He clicks the next slide. "The Diabolonites were shaken onto Aepple products once they had arrived at the warehouses by agents of mine. Each product then became my own little sleeping robot, waiting to be sold into various human homes."

"Kowalski." Skipper glared.

"How was I supposed to know he'd pull inspiration from that? I'M NOT A MIND READER."

"Oh, that's not all." The dolphin cackled. "When I press this button again, like so"—he lifted a remote from his Segway console and pressed a button—"the small bots will merge into larger adversaries! Perhaps we should take a moment and watch?" He switched away from the presentation slide and back to the news report with a smirk. "Remind you of anything else, Kowalski? Oh look how they scatter, like a school before a shark." The dolphin sighed.

"Oh my cod." Kowalski then gasped. "My robot world domination scheme, you thought it would actually work?"

"Mittens, I thought it had genius potential. It was very well thought out." He teased another feather on his chest. "So? What do you say? Want to watch how it plays out with me?" He grinned at him.

Kowalski just stared at him and glanced at the screen and back. "Francis, I'm flattered, really, but you know I can't."

"Exactly, he can't. Now stop flirting and get on with it." Skipper made a face. "I'm ready to kick your tail halfway to Bermuda."

"Well, that wouldn't make you a very nice house guest anymore, and here I was contemplating inviting you to tea after all." He clicked his tongue, shaking his head. "No manners, no manners at all." He snuck a quick kiss with Kowalski before leaning away from his cuffed foes.

"Oh yeah, I definitely can see that firm line between work and relationship there." Skipper frowned. "Using information you gathered on dates with Kowalski for your schemes. I thought we had an agreement on that."

"We do, but the agreement only covers what was shared after we officially became a couple. The first two dates…Don't count. Plus, I had to do something with some of the intel I got. Couldn't let Project Firefly be a complete waste of time."

Marlene now tilted her head at that. "Are you saying dating Kowalski has been a waste of time?"

The dolphin spun around to look at her. "NO! I DID NOT SAY THAT!"

"That's what it sounded like, since I'm guessing that the whole plan was dating Kowalski for information?"

Blowhole looked from her to Kowalski. The penguin wasn't saying anything, but those hurt kitten eyes were saying enough. No. No no no no.

"That part, the dating part, wasn't a waste. I meant the data collection. The information collecting process was a waste! Mainly a waste of the lobsters' time, but no no no, the dating wasn't a waste. I did not mean that, I assure you." He motioned frantically with his flipper to illustrate his point, causing him to almost lose balance on his Segway. He managed then to balance himself, but also in doing so, pressed down a button on his console.

The penguins' cuffs then unlocked and the four slipped down to the ground into their standard fighting positions.

"Crabcakes." Blowhole groaned, rubbing his flipper on his face. "This isn't going how I planned, and I can't even blame Skipper for it." He huffed and pressed another button.

Two walls opened to reveal squadrons of lobsters, scuttling into the room.

"Lobsters, you know the drill. Attack the penguins…Or whatever…" He sighed, shaking his head, turning away to watch the screen.

"Kowalski, you get on that robot problem, we'll handle the lobsters." Skipper glanced at him.

"On it." He nodded.

The lobster fray then clashed with the penguins. The team at first focused on covering Kowalski as he jumped up onto Blowhole's Segway.

"I'll take that, thank you." He grunted, grabbing the remote before the dolphin could pick it up again.

The dolphin didn't even try to lift a flipper to stop him. "At least you have some manners about it."

Kowalski then slid away from the crowd, studying the buttons on the remote. Different colored buttons, not a single label to be seen. Oh well, time to guess and hope. He pressed a blue button with one eye hesitantly shut.

"Self-destruct sequence activated."

"CRABCAKES, KOWALSKI! READ THE LABELS!" The dolphin gasped.

"THERE AREN'T ANY. YOU NEVER LABEL."

"I DID THIS TIME. YOU AREN'T WEARING YOUR GLASSES! WHERE ARE YOU GLASSES?"

"ON MY DESK, I FORGOT ABOUT THEM." Kowalski pressed another button on the remote.

"Diabolonites deactivated. Self-destruct in one minute."

"Dear Neptune, I wasn't ready for the lair explosion yet." Blowhole looked around as already the lair had begun to shake and parts from the ceiling were falling to the ground. "Ughhhh, fine, I'm defeated, whatever. Just get out of here already. Go."

Kowalski looked over at him. "Why don't you come with us? Since we all have to leave anyway?"

"No, no, I've got to make my dramatic exit and all. I'll see you around, go on, gooo."

"Self-destruct in thirty seconds."

"But, Francis—"

"—Kowalski, there ain't time for Hallmark goodbyes, you heard the dolphin!" Skipper shouted as he ran by, carrying a squirming, unamused Marlene.

Before Kowalski could say anything else, Rico had snatched him as they fled the lair. Mere seconds later, the lair exploded behind them, sending them flying into the fence bordering the amusement park edge.

After sliding down to the ground, Kowalski got up, staring at the destruction in their wake. All of the fire; the metal and plastic on nearby rides creaking, bending, melting; the horrible smells now filling the air. But none of that mattered to him. He stood on his tip toes in an attempt to see past the chaos towards the ocean. Surely if Francis made it out, he would have gone to the ocean, right? The back way surely led him there?

The other four soon join him as they all stretch and rub their sore bodies from the fight and the explosion.

Kowalski then felt a flipper pat his shoulder and he turned to look at Skipper.

"He's Dr. Blowhole, he'll be back. He always reappears."

"I know…But he wasn't ready for it to explode." He began to pick at the feathers of his other flipper. "What if this time…He didn't get out in time? Maybe he ran out of luck—or worse, my luck was contagious." His eyes began to water.

"Nah, I'm sure he's fine, just, you know…Being dramatic. Is he alive? Is he dead? He's gonna keep us guessing til he suddenly is asking you about your next date, probably." He shook his head. "One of his more obnoxious traits."

"Yeah…He is kind of a tailhole like that." He sighed, nodding as he turned away from the explosion. "I just…I hope he did really make it out okay."

Private also patted Kowalski. "Perhaps back at the HQ you can try calling him or one of his minions?"

"Yeah…I'll give that a try." He nodded again, wiping his eyes. "Thank you…All of you."


Kowalski sat at his lab bench, staring out one of the porthole windows at the pool water outside. It wasn't the most entertaining view, but he wasn't really paying attention to his views anyway. No, his mind was somewhere else, wrapped up in his thoughts.

It had been about three weeks since their "save New York from Dr. Blowhole" mission. Still, no sign or word from him. No luck trying to trace or track him using his usual methods either. He had at least heard from Red One, so that did lead to a little hope that maybe…Maybe he was fine.

He better be fine.

At the same time, if he had been fine this whole time and just hadn't been in touch, he might kill him. If all this worry was over completely nothing? Oh yeah, he'll give Francis something to worry about alright himself.

Kowalski took a sip from his tea and sighed deeply.

He better be fine.

A knock at the door then caught his attention. "Yeah?"

Skipper stepped into the room, carrying a little envelope. "Mail came; this suspicious letter is addressed to you. No return address."

"Mm?" He took the envelope with a raised brow and opened it. He then shook a flash drive into his flipper. "Odd."

"You expecting a ransom video or something?" Skipper crossed his flippers, eyeing it like it may explode at any moment.

"Doubtful, but at the same time…." He shook his head side to side. Being kidnapped would be an acceptable reason to have been missing and out of contact for three weeks.

He then pulled out his laptop and opened it up, plugging it in. "May as well see what's on it."

"What if it's a virus thing?"

"There isn't anything on this hard drive for it to be of much concern, just schoolwork." He shook his head as he clicked the only file contained on the flash drive: a MP3 file. He clicked on it.

The song "I Will Be There" from the Count of Monte Cristo then played. Nothing else was on the file.

"…The deuce was that about?"

Kowalski gripped the edge of the lab bench for a long moment before taking a deep breath. "Skipper, he may be your arch, but if he's still alive, I'm going to kill him."

Skipper quickly turned and looked at him. "What? Why? Did I miss something?"

He gestured to the computer before smacking it shut. "THIS. THIS–THIS TAILHOLE." He face-flippered. "This romantic gesture after I have been kept in the dark for 3 weeks? I get the message he's sending, but cod darn it. I'm going to kill his dramatic tail fluke."

Awkwardly, Skipper patted him. "Uh…Not sure what to say here, but uh…You're not…Actually planning murder right? JUST double checking."

"No, of course not." He frowned. "I'm just…I'm upset, Skipper. I'm hurt. I'm mad. I'm worried. Though I do appreciate the sign of life presented by this flash drive, it tells me nothing about what's been going on. He just makes me so…So….Grrrrr." He rubbed his flippers up his face.

"A h." He rubbed under his beak and studied him for a moment. "You really do…Feel a lot for him, don't you?"

"…Yeah…I do…I feel a lot for him." He sighed, hanging his head. "I'm sorry, I guess. I know that's probably not something you really like hearing."

Skipper crossed his flippers again with a shrug. "As you brought up before…This kinda situation, you need me as your brother, not your commanding officer. So while I'm cautious and suspicious of him and you being a thing…as long as he treats you right, I guess…I'm letting you see how it works out." He sighed, looking away.

Kowalski now looked over at him. "Really?"

"Yeah. You've already lasted longer than I expected. Kinda surprised me, honestly." He rubbed the back of his neck. "And I know I'm biased…But…If you two end up…You know, one day wanting to tie the knot or whatever…We'll adjust."

The tall penguin just stared at him, completely astonished before sweeping Skipper up into a tight hug. "Thank you."

Skipper grunted, kicking his feet reflectively, not enjoying being off the ground. "Yeah, yeah, okay. Let me down, let me down."

Kowalski gently sat him back on the ground with a sheepish smile.

"It's fine, you nancy cat." He dusted himself off, retreating more for the door. "But yeah, uh…Glad you're calmer and all." He nodded to him before slipping out. A tactical retreat.

Kowalski pushed the door shut, before waddling over to the porthole and looking out once again. "Francis, you drive me crazy. I hope you realize that." He sighed to himself, scratching at his flipper.