A Family Holiday

At Cachtice castle with seven small children.

Daphne watched in silent horror as all five children yelled, pushed, and shoved like wild beasts to snatch handfuls of sugar cookies and chew on them. She glanced over at Great-Grandmama, who was, remakably, sitting with her mouth open, looking incredulously at her children. Daphne felt her cheeks flushing. They were dangerously close to being on their very worst behaviour. Though, there was no blood being spilled, so it wasn't as bad as the extended Weasley family barbecue last year.

"STOP SHOVING!" Harry shouted. Daphne looked over and her husband's face was red, and he had veins visible in his neck "I am SO Disappointed in you. Take two each and no shoving, yelling, or biting. And Effie, no, just because I did not mention elbowing does not mean you can cob your brother!"

Harry never yelled. He never got red-faced. And… he collapsed into a chair, hiding his face.

"Your Father is so embarrassed by you all," said Daphne sharply. Harry groaned. Daphne glanced over at Great-Grandmama, who had one eyebrow up and her mouth closed in a flat but not pressed thin line.

"I've become my uncle," Harry whimpered, with his hands still covering his face.

"Children, you will not be getting dessert again, for the foreseeable future" said Daphne.

Caph turned to her, and made huge eyes and pouted.

Great-Grandmama tapped the arm of her chair, and the arm-rest opened, and a crystal ball slid up.

"Children" said Great-Grandmama rather loudly, and with less of an accent than normal.

All the children turned to look at Great-Grandmama.

"Your mother says you won't get dessert in the foreseeable future. Conveniently, I hav a crystal ball. Let me see if I can see when you will next eat dessert?" said Great-Grandmama.

She isn't going to, thought Daphne. Can she even?

Great-Grandmama stroked the crystal ball, and it glowed a soft white, and Great-Grandmama stared into it.

"Hmm" she said loudly "I'm looking at this week, and I don't see any dessert. Let me see if the inner eye will let me see next week?"

Harry had looked up.

He whispered "The old fraud."

"Next week, hmm, back at home, but still I see a tall man with curly black hair, and… he's taking a large sponge-cake… and opened in a door, a blue door, and taking the cake …. and oh, he's fed it to the chickens."

"Jimmy" squeaked Altair.

"Is she actually a seer?" asked Harry quietly.

"I have no idea. I… I used to think she had spies." whispered Daphne. The children were staring at the glowing crystal ball fixedly.

"No, I can't see past next week. Perhaps the moon is blocking that." said Great-Grandmama, and she lifted her fingers from the ball, and the light faded.

"Erzabet, you mustn't strain yourself so" said Franz. "Looking so far into the future of seven people."

"But they were so naughty, Why my girls, had they done that, I would have chained them in the dungeons, and let the rats crawl over their bare toes." said Great-Grandmama. "Daphne never did anything wrong when she came to visit."

"The puppy" said Franz blandly.

"Well, she was only five, and the puppy was a puppy." said Great-Grandmama.

"Puppy?" asked Harry.

"I took the puppy to my room he made a mess" whispered Daphne. "They've visited, they know what Jimmy looks like."

"Can we get her to send letters, do you think?" asked Harry quietly. "To tell the children things?"

"Harry, you're a monster" whispered Daphne, she paused, "I'll ask after they're in bed."

Harry sighed.

"Hey" said Daphne "You could have used parseltounge to tell them off. Great-Grandmama had heard you do it before."

"I'm not in the habit." said Harry "People mostly, you know. Think it's dark magic."

"Great-Grandmama probably does too" said Daphne pointedly.

"Well, now they've had a snack Daphne, you can show them around the schloss before dinner." said Great-Grandmama "I am tired" and Great-Grandmama glared in a way that indicated 'your children have given me a headache.'

"Harry, up" said Daphne "You take the end of the line, I'll take front. Altair, Caph, come here now."

Altair and Caph came over.

"Altair, in front of me" said Harry "Caph, behind your mother. Quits, in the middle."

The children made a line with a little elbowing.

"Cobbing makes it unlikely you will see dessert again this month" said Harry. The quints turned and made huge eyes at Harry.

"Come along children" said Daphne. "Follow me."

Harry saw Great-Grandmama Bathory nod minutely as they left.

The first room Daphne led them to was a side-room off the main hall, with a much lower ceiling, and a pointy roof that reminded him of Hogwarts. Wooden frames draped with strings were piled against the window side of the room.

"This is the meeting room for smaller meetings" said Daphne "Great-Grandmama doesn't use it, except in rainy weather to dry clothes."

"Mummy" asked Altair "Why don't you call Franz Great-Grandpapa?"

"Because he's not" said Daphne "Great-Grandpapa died and Great-Grandmama remarried. Franz was a captain in the ICW during Grindelwald's war. That's how he got his medals."

"Like daddy" asked Altair.

Daphne gave Harry an amused look "Daddy killed Tom Riddle – the dark lord who called himself Voldemort, Franz didn't do anything near as dangerous."

"If Daddy did a big thing, why doesn't he have a medal?" asked Caph.

"Your father does not like the medal and won't wear it." said Daphne.

"I only did it because I had to. Tom was obsessed with killing me, because he'd failed to, when he killed Grandma Lily and Grandpa James" said Harry.

"What's obsessed?" asked Stella.

"He couldn't stop thinking about it." said Harry.

"Oh" said Stella "Like mummy and daddy kissing" she added. Harry caught Daphne's eye. Her throat was slightly pink.

"We're not obsessed dear" said Daphne "But how do you think you all got here?"

"Uncle George says it was a really big stork" volunteered Sirius. Harry exhaled – he would have to thank George at some point.

"Now, we're going to go up a spiral staircase now" said Daphne, headed over to the corner of the room "The staircase is inside a small round tower. There's a rope on the outside, if you get wobbly, hang in, and we'll rest."

"Why's it a spiral?" asked Caph.

"Because it's a castle thing" said Daphne "Hogwarts Castle has spiral staircases and square ones – Čachtice is not as big, so it only has spiral ones. Also, if the castle was invaded by bad people, spiral staircases are easier to defend."

"Are there gonna be bad people?" asked Altair.

"No" said Daphne firmly "Great-Grandmama has the castle defences set to family only right now. To keep all her little Great-Grandchildren safe."

"And you and daddy?" asked Caph.

"And me and daddy, yes" said Daphne. "Come on, we're going up a floor."

The children struggled a little on the stone steps.

"They're like slices of cake" said Altair to Harry as they climbed.

"They what?"

"The steps" explained Altair.

"Yes" agreed Harry, his legs aching a little.

Daphne got led the children out a door in the staircase into a narrow stone hallway.

The hallway led to a large room over the main hall, with many doors.

"This is the main living space of the castle" explained Daphne "We're on the first floor of the western donjon A donjon is the main building of a castle" said Daphne "The Donjon is in the middle of all the walls, so that attacking armies would have to fight thorough many gates and wall to get here."

Stella's eyes had grown large as saucers.

"Stella," said Harry "The castle was built a long time ago. We won't get attacked. Nobody knows we're here, the protective enchantments keep out non-family, and if you had been listening to your mother, everyone – muggles see and visit a different castle. One in ruins."

"The Western donjon is the meeting rooms and this room" explained Daphne "The Eastern Donjon has the bedrooms and the better kitchen. When the castle had guards, they lived here, and family lived up a level, but only in times of war."

"WHY don't we have a castle" asked Caph loudly.

"Becuase we don't" said Harry "We have houses. Our families might have fortified houses before the seventeenth century, and the statute of secrecy, but once we muggle-repelled everything, there were very few armies."

"During Grindelwald's war, the ICW put a garrison in Cachtice castle, just in case" said Daphne. She paused "Franz was the commander, later in the war."

"So… he was a guard here?" asked Caph, perceptively. "What was he guarding?"

"Our Bathory family" said Daphne "They were very precious" she said and she shot Harry a pointed look that Harry interpreted to mean 'They were suspected of being supporters of Grindelwald, and the ICW didn't want him having another fortified base.'

For what felt like 'ten long, hard years,' Harry took his children on a walk around the castle, seeing the sights. Daphne led, of course, as she knew the way. Harry began to thing that with a little luck, he could get around the castle withouot getting too badly lost.

"Daddy this is so much bigger than our house" commented Stella.

What felt like another hour of walking the hallways and seeing the rooms later, the children were visibly flagging and Daphne led them across the centre courtyard to the eastern donjon, which was bigger, up a spiral staircase, and along a hallway into a room with several large four-poster beds, and windows with deep reveals.

"Who needs the loo?" asked Daphne.

Several hands went up.

"It's over there" said Daphne , drawing her wand and waving it to open a small door. "Alphabetical order, but the quints first."

Caph's brows furrowed at that. Harry sighed, and sat in a chair with familiar looking cross-shaped legs.

Altair went to the nearest window-alcove and looked out "There's a tower on the end of the west dunjon" he said.

"That's the duelling tower" explained Daphne "You can only get to it from the courtyard. It's got the family collection of duelling robes and trophies, and a few old things from when there were guards."

"How many floors has it got?" asked Altair. Harry felt quite impressed at the question.

"Four, but we never use the top floor" said Daphne sharply.

"Mum" asked Altair "Why not?"

"Do you need the loo, Altair?" asked Daphne. Harry stood up "Where the next one?" he asked.

"Four doors down" said Daphne. "Altair, with daddy?"

Hesper followed Harry and Altair four doors down, and when Harry opened the door, he was surprised. The room was nearly bare, with the plaster falling off the walls, and a dilapidated bare four-posted bed-frame. But there were two windows, and a door to a loo.

"It's messy" said Altair.

Harry opened the loo door- it was usable, and while Altair did his business, Harry used his wand to vanish loose plaster from the floor, and smooth off one wall.

While Hesper did her business, Altair peered out the windows, and Harry mended another wall.

"Father?" asked Altair "There's a hallway all around from the eastern donjon. You can see it."

Harry looked out the window, and there was, truly, a building along the walls from one donjon to the other, that looked to be the size of large house.

"Why didn't we go that way?" asked Altair "It looks like a house."

"I don't know Altair, I've never been here before" said Harry "We'll ask mummy when Hesper's done."

Hesper came out and blinked owlishly at Harry "The seat was cold daddy" she said.

"It's a castle" said Harry. "Your mother told me Great-Grandmama's castle was a bit cold."

"Is Grim old place a castle?" asked Hepser. "Cos it's cold too."

Harry resisted saying 'No, it's just a shithole' and said "It's just that Grimmauld place, and it doesn't have central heating. That's why we moved to Potter house, before any of you were born."

"Why doesn't it have central heating?" asked Hesper.

"It's too old for central heating, and putting it in would be expensive" explained Harry. "And we have Potter house."

"But… why doesn't Great-Grandmama have central heating?" asked Hesper. "She's really old" she added.

"Well, adults can do warming charms" said Harry.

He led his two back to the room with all the others.

"The wall was falling off" said Altair loudly.

"Just some plaster" corrected Harry.

The children made piles in the four-poster beds and 'tested' the pillows, by lying down and wiggling about. But they quickly fell asleep, and Harry and Daphne pulled up the embroidered covers over them.

"How long?" asked Harry.

"I give them an hour tops" said Daphne.

"Is… the maintenance too much for them?" asked Harry quietly. Daphne shrugged.

"I didn't notice as a child" she said quietly "But I think between money and being old, yes."

"Surely other relatives visit?"

"She's not very popular" said Daphne "My European cousins think she's well – you know."

Harry pulled her out into the hallway and closed the door "An unreconstructed grindelwald supporter?"

"That was Great-Great-Grandpapa" said Daphne "He fought in the war. Great-Grandpapa came home and wrote books about fishing. Drowned trying to catch a water dragon in Hunan, somewhere."

"So she's?"

"Like I've said. Think broke Malfoys" said Daphne. Harry wrapped Daphne in a hug "Well, we've got half an hour, they're locked in, and we're in a castle."

"They're not locked in" said Daphne.

Harry drew his wand and jabbed the lock. "As I said…"

Daphne poked him with a pointy finger. "Those are our children!"

"And I love them, but, half and hour of peace and quiet is half and hour of peace and quiet" said Harry, conjuring a large, fairly shapeless overstuffed chintzy chair, and sitting. He held up his arms and Daphne sat on his lap.

"Hello darling" said Harry. "Have I ever mentioned that you're part princess?"

"No" said Daphne, lifting one eyebrow. Harry kissed her gently on the lips. "Well you are." he said.

"Don't exaggerate" said Daphne "Great-Grandmama's only a duchess."

"But that's these days. Back in the day" said Harry.

Daphne lifted her nose "That's a long time ago. And not my family's finest hour."

Harry nuzzled her neck "You're my beautiful princess" said Harry.

Daphne snorted "Are you after something?" she asked.

"A snog" said Harry.

"But we've got half an hour" said Daphne, stroking Harry's chest.

"Oh"

"The next room will have a bed" said Daphne.

"But there are all these tiny rooms" said Harry softly.

Daphne kissed Harry's ear "Are you suggesting we find a hall cupboard?" she whispered. "Because I'm sorry to tell you, there aren't any. It's all wardrobes, garderobes and hallways."

"Well, the pointy-topped towers must have attic rooms" said Harry thoughtfully.

"Dust, pigeons and bats" said Daphne.

"I'm really good at vanishing dirt" said Harry, squeezing Daphne.

"The top of the duelling tower is forbidden" said Daphne.

"Forbidden?"

"Lets say… we don't ever go there for family reasons."

"Sounds perfect" purred Harry.

"Harry, my ancestress was bricked in and left to die. It's not a romantic getaway!" said Daphne.

"Surely it's been cleaned out" said Harry "After the statute at least."

"Forbidden, by the old bat" said Daphne "I have no idea."

"Fantastic" said Harry, pulling Daphne off his lap and standing "My other hobbies include going to forbidden rooms in castles."

"She'd be really cross" said Daphne.

"What, 'never speak to us again, forbid us to visit cross', or 'break out the Unforgivables' cross?" asked Harry.

"The former, not the latter" said Daphne.

"Cool" said Harry, and he held Daphne's hand and dragged her along the hallway to the room with a loo, and to the window, to inspect the far tower.

"Looks like it's just part of the building" said Harry.

"That's more recent building" said Daphne. "There's a pile of old drawings from the fifteenth century. Great-Grandmama made us copy them as drawing practice."

Harry wrapped an arm around Daphne "Apparating on three" he said.

"You can't apparate there, you've never been."

"I can just barely see in the window" said Harry "That'll do."

With a crack of compressing darkness, pressing in on his eyes and eardrums, Harry apparated into the top room of the duelling tower.

It was a dry but dusty bedroom, wiht one window, one derelict four-poster double bed, and with one door off it. An archway that might have been a door once was messily bricked up.

Daphne coughed. "So dusty" she said, and then eyed the four-poster bed. All the fabric had disintegrated, tiny pieces still hanging from the top bars.

Harry looked at the bed- and there wasn't a suspiciously body-shaped bulge on the collapsed mattress.

Daphne was craning her head around, so Harry let her go.

"We should not be doing this" said Daphne.

"Come on, this is our first exploring adventure" said Harry.

"Chamber of secrets, Our house" said Daphne.

"Fine, our second in a castle" said Harry. "Would have thought there'd be apparation boundaries set up"

"The space-substitution to hide the castle and have a ruin for the muggles makes that sort of thing tricky, apparently" said Daphne "Expanded spaces within expanded spaces are okay, but bent space to stop apparition inside stretched space is a bit like … like stretching a jersey then asking for a big ruffle at the same time."

"Hmm" said Harry "Have you ever thought about teaching theory?"

"I do – to you" said Daphne. "So we're looking for my great-something's grandmothers corpse?"

"She'd be pretty dried out" said Harry "and I don't think she's here."

"Why not?"

"Well, the door. No count scratched on the walls, but more importantly, you."

"What?" asked Daphne.

"You're her descendant, so she had children."

"Um yes?"

"Before or after being locked up?"

"Oh. I assumed before" said Daphne.

"And… hypothetically someone bricks your mother into a tower. How long before you get her out?" asked Harry.

Daphne frowned and crossed her arms "There must have been guards and things"

"Muggle guards" said Harry. "If she was doing dark magic, she would have been more trouble than a pre-ICW Europe would bother with."

"Are you?" asked Daphne "Actually implying that the ICW, the same ICW that incarcerated us for a stupid misunderstanding, is not worthless?"

"No. They're idiots" said Harry, walking to the only other door and opening it. It led to a small stone room with a wood-covered bench at one end, and a toilet-sized hole in the bench. A pot with a stick in it sat on the bench. And a crude wooden ladder led up to an open trapdoor on the ceiling.

Harry looked into the hole, and saw daylight.

"So this is the loo" said Harry. "And the exit."

Daphne said "The hole in a garderobe is too small to leave through", and she walked over.

Harry pointed to the ladder "Ladder to attic. Makes sense really – pointy attic, you'd need a trapdoor somewhere."

"My ancestress waited till they'd bricked the door up, went to the loo, pulled down the ladder and left via the attic?"

"Attic roof hatch, and a broom" said Harry "A squib could have done it."

"So she didn't die in the tower" said Daphne, stroking her chin.

"Well, she did get bricked in" said Harry. And he had a sudden, horrible thought.

"Daphne?" he asked "did you ever meet your Great-Great-Grandfather?"

"Of course not, he died in Grindelwald's war" said Daphne.

"Who told you?"

"Um… Great-Grandmother" said Daphne. Harry nodded, feeling slightly nervous.

"Daphne, not wanting to sound paranoid or anything" said Harry "But your Great-Grandmother is very old, and is named after your ancestress from about three hundred something years ago, who didn't die in this tower."

"Don't be silly. Four hundred is very old for a witch" said Daphne.

"And she was imprisoned for what?" asked Harry, lifting his eyebrows.

"Well… blood magic. Human sacrifices to reverse ageing" admitted Daphne. "We don't have those books anymore, The ICW do actually inspect the castle every fifty years, just in case."

Harry nodded "And the last guard commander is married to Erzabet Bathory." he said. "Whose husband went a long way away and died after Grindelwald's war."

"My Great-Grandmother is a demented fossil, but she's not a four-hundred year old dark-magic using witch!" said Daphne indignantly "If she could reverse ageing, she'd be my age, not so old she gets tired out by a few high-spirited children."

"Maybe with Franz keeping an eye on her, she can't do the blood magic rituals." said Harry mildly "Maybe she's mellowed with age."

"Harry dear, the only reason she deigns to speak to you, is because you're a Slytherin parselmouth." said Daphne "She assumes that makes you a dark-magic practitioner."

"And accused of breaking the statute of secrecy big time" quipped Harry "Which would appeal to… Erzabet Bathory. The original one."

"Let's get out of here before we get in trouble" said Daphne.

Harry walked into the very time-worn bedroom once more, and was about to wrap his arms around Daphne for a bit of side-along apparation, when he noticed something about the bed. The head of the bed had a painting on the headboard, obscured by fallen, mostly rotted fabric. Harry reached over and pushed it away, revealing a very dusty old painting on the cracked wood panelling, of a young woman, with an extremely old-fashioned head-dress on.

"Oh" said Daphne, and she waved her wand, and vanished the dust on the painting. The woman in the painting looked somewhat like Daphne's great-grandmother, the same long nose, and full lips, similar, in fact to Daphne, though her lips were thinner, Harry thought, taking more after her father than her mother. The woman was, a lot like Daphne's Great-Grandmama, but not entirely – her ears were smaller and a different shape, for one thing.

"Hmm" said Harry "not your Great-Grandmother" he conceded.

"But" said Daphne "An awful lot like the picture of Great-Great-Grandmother, who only died just after Grindelwald's war."

"Oh, just after" said Harry, full of suspicion "Must have been a hassle, with Franz in the castle, hard to do blood magic."

"She was very old, Harry, over two hundred. Nobody lives to over three hundred these days. I mean people claim Merlin lived to be six hundred, but that's not sensible." said Daphne. "She would have been four hundred years old."

"Nicholas Flamel, with the Philosophers Stone, lived to be six hundred" sad Harry "And he got tired of living in the end, not out of ageing."

"Blood magic's not the Philosophers Stone!" said Daphne.

"Course not" said Harry. "But I've seen resurrection rituals – Voldemort did one, and honestly, it wasn't that complicated. Any witch with a horcrux could do it."

"But the original Erzabet was found dead" said Daphne. "They fed her through a slot in the bricks"

Harry looked over at the intact, completely walled off wall over the doorway. With no slot.

"They must have knocked the bricks down to get her body out" said Daphne.

"And walled it up to, erm, keep people out" said Harry.

"Let's get out of here" said Daphne.

Harry hugged Daphne and apparated them back to the room with the broken wooden bed and the working toilet.

"No, admit that my Great-Grandmama is not the original Erzabet Bathory?" said Daphne.

Harry nodded, not letting her go. "This is exactly like my Hogwarts adventures" admitted Harry "We would have conflicting theories."

"I admit my Great-Great-Grandmother looked a lot like the first Erzabet" said Daphne. "Wish I had her ears. Mine stick out."

"Yours are cute" said Harry.

"They are not, they stick out"

"Cute" said Harry, kissing her ear.

Two minutes later, Harry heard yelling and squealing from behind the door to the children's room.

He un-stuck it and went in, to find seven children rampaging about.

"$STOP RIGHT NOW$" Harry hissed "$That's it. I've had enough$."

The children all stopped still and looked at Harry with still eyes, and quivering eyelids, and down-turning little mouths.

"$You are all far worse behaved that I was as a child$" Harry continued "$I will be looking at all my options as far as schooling. I think Durmstrang is somewhere very cold$."

Rigel, who was in Harry's opinion the most innocuous quint, burst into tears, followed by Estelle, then much more stagily, Caph.

"But father" complained Rigel "If I don't go to Hogwarts, how can I meet a beautiful pure-blood witch like mummy!"

Harry quickly looked over at Daphne who'd been scowling at the children, and then momentarily, had a smug little smile on her face. Harry momentarily considered telling the children that he didn't meet their mother at Hogwarts, thought about the can of worms that would open, and sighed.

Harry and Daphne policed up disarranged clothes and Daphne popped into the loo.

"It's nearly time for dinner "said Daphne "Now, children, Great-Grandmama expects better behaviour. Please be on your best behaviour, or your father will doubtless hiss at you very sternly."

Harry didn't appreciate being told to be the 'mean parent' but the little terrors straightened up.

Daphne led them all back to the main hall, where Franz was bent over, fiddling with a very old phonograph.

"We have a dance before the meal" said Franz, and Harry looked around for signs of Daphne's Great-Grandmother. She was nowhere to be seen.

"Erzabet's in the kitchen, cooking for this many is a little more than Frau Farbissiner is used to" said Franz. He turned to the children "I hope you are hungry?"

The children nodded.

"Good" said Franz "We're in Hungary." Harry made eye contact with Daphne who just shook her head slightly.

Altair's eighty-year old eyebrows bent. One of them noticed, thought Harry.

Franz set the phonograph arm down and the opening bars of what Harry was quite sure was a waltz of some kind started.

"Vienna Waltz" said Franz "Wien – Vienna, children is just eighty miles down the valley. This Waltz is from there."

Daphne lifted both eyebrows and looked at Harry expectantly.

Harry walked over and bent low over Daphne's hand and kissed it. He stood up and held out his arms and Daphne and he started to waltz.

The children, Harry glimpsed, were pulling faces

Daphne looked up at him from quite low.

"I'm up here, shorty" murmured Harry.

"I'm not wearing high heels here" said Daphne into his ear "You'd be terrible. Besides the flagstones are very uneven. My stupid cousin Alabeth came here one Yule in high heels, she spent the whole time falling over. Philomena and I had something to laugh at, at least."

"Philomena?"

"Of all my cousins from Uncle B, she's … well she's weird as a blast-ended skrewt, but she's okay. Alabeth's five years older than me. I think she married an enchanter."

"Uncle B?"

"Balgrog. Great-Uncle Gyorgy liked odd names" said Daphne.

The music got to a lift, and unprompted, Harry lifted and twirled Daphne, who smiled in surprise "You can lift me!" she said, grinning.

"Well, the potion works." said Harry, and Daphne laughed melodically.

The children were watching from the sidelines, as Great-Grandmama came in and started to very slowly dance with Franz.

"They're gonna kiss now" said Altair morosely. "They always end up kissing."

Harry have Daphne a peck on the cheek at the end of the record.

"Well, that was nice" said Erzabet, one hand to her chest. "Well just sit down and eat now, yes."

Franz limped into his chair and slumped, looking spent. Harry supposed he was quite old.

The children lined the table down both sides, and seemed, to Harry's jaundiced eye, to be behaving themselves. The table had four wine-glasses at the head end, and goblets of something, Harry assumed water, for the children.

A basked of sliced bread floated into the room and onto the table, followed by a medium sized cauldron. "Goulash" said Erzabet "It is… stew" she said in accented English.

A wine-bottle floated into the room and landed by Erzabet, who picked it up and squinted at it. "Gut" she said, and with a click of her fingers, the cork vanished. Harry tried to ignore that and conctrate on the logistics of feeding the children – floating bread to their plates.

Daphne stood up and spooned out goulash into the bowls, and Harry floated those to their places, serving Erzabet and Franz first, then the children, the quints first. The quints picked up spoons and attacked the creamy stew energetically.

Harry enjoyed the goulash, even if Daphne apparently didn't like the bread. It seemed quite good to Harry, but she wasn't much for eating bread.

Erzabet had poured a glass of wine and sipped it delicately. "Yah" she said ,and Franz shakily poured wine into all the other glasses.

Harry sipped some wine, and it was quite decent, he supposed.

"We didn't ask if he drank …. wine" said Erzabet, and Daphne for some reason rolled her eyes. Some family joke, Harry supposed.

The second glasses tasted better, thought Harry.

Harry paid a little attention to the children, and pointed at the bread, so Altair handed out more to Rigel and Sirius.

Harry, Daphne and the elderly Bathory's stayed at the table nursing the bottle along, while the children got up.

"You can run around in the side room" said Daphne, and she turned immediately to Erzabet "If that is all right, Great-Grandmother?"

"It is fine." said Erzabet, lips pursed.

Harry resisted the urge to close the door on the children.

Frau Farbissiner tottered into the hall, and went to Erzabet. "Was the wine acceptable?"

"Gut." said Erzabet "The children are in the side room. They are not to have dessert."

Frau Farbissiner waved her wand and the dinner bowls and plates stacked themselves into slightly wobbly piles.

She left, herding them and the cauldron with her wand.

"So, how are you going to get the ICW to let you out of prison" asked Erzabet bluntly.

"Well, we thought the British Ministry might do that, with a little help from the Commandant" said Daphne.

"From that little balfék?" asked Erzabet sharply.

"We gave testimony to him, and it was a surprise" said Harry politely.

"Even though you're a snake speaker." said Franz.

"That doesn't make me evil" said Harry very politely "Just a descendant of Salazar Slytherin. Parselmouth's aren't necessarily evil."

"And you have a wand now" said Franz.

"They were on the beach when we were injured" said Harry.

"We're never going to Spain again" said Daphne.

Caph came out of the side room and investigated her goblet.

"Please mother, I am thirsty?" she asked, suspiciously politely.

Daphne took the goblet and refilled it with a water-making charm.

Caph left politely. Harry stared at her – something was up.

"I'll have Farbissiner set them out some more pumpkin juice" said Erzabet, and she pointed her wand at a velvet cord running up the side of a pillar, and jabbed her wand. The cord jerked.

A little later, Farbisssiner came out with a bottle of wine.

"Pumpkin juice for the little ones" said Erzabet. Frau Farbissiner nodded, left the bottle on the table, and waved her wand. The goblets spiralled off the table into a floating ring and followed her away, slowly flying in circles.

"There's a side door" said Erzabet, "More wine?"

"Please" said Franz, and Harry suspected his children were to be blamed later.

But it was nice wine, and they drank it in a very leisurely way, Daphne relaxing and leaning against him pleasantly.

Erzabet finally said "Well, you hav given me the most Great-Great-Grandchildren of all the Great-Grandchildren. So, well done on that. They're all magical?"

Harry felt an instant annoyance, the old bat was casually asking if any of their children were squibs.

"They all have had accidental magic" said Daphne politely. Not mentioning that for most of them, it had been summoning snacks from the kitchen.

And her left foot hooked around his ankle and rubbed up and down. Was she trying to tell him not to snap at the old fossil? Probably.

Frau Farbissiner was handing out goblets she filled from a copper carafe when Caph asked "May I please have some cake?"

"You want cake?" asked Frau Farbissiner.

Caph nodded "I'm always peckish after dinner, you see" she said innocently.

-==0==-

Harry was supervising the bathing of the seven children, in a rather spartan bathroom off one of the halls, when Caph sniffled "Daddy!" cried Caph "Frau Farbissiner made me eat panettone! It was awful!"

"What?" asked Harry.

"I wanted cake, but she gave me panettone!" cried Caph.

"What flavour jam did you have on it?" asked Daphne, coming in from the hallway.

"Jam?" asked Caph "What?"

"You had … Frau Farbissiner gave you dry panettone?" asked Daphne.

Caph sniffled.

"Serves you right" muttered Daphne. "panettone is often eaten with a sweet sauce" she said loudly, so the other six could hear.

-==0==-

The children discovered that they were allowed to run about in the outer castle grounds, and took to waging war on each other with (soft) conjured wooden shields and swords.

Which let Harry have adult time with the elderly Countess….

"So, do you have any other reasons to come to see your old Great-Grandmother?" asked Erzabet, not acting wavery and elderly for a change. Harry suspected she was quite spry and acted up. And the uncharitable thought that his mother-in-law had inherited certain… dramatic tendencies crossed his mind. Fortunately, Daphne was a calm, sensible… well a steady, sensible witch, and that she was quite beautiful was quite lucky too.

Well, we need some staff for Black Books's new office in Zurich" said Daphne.

"Zhat… account-keeping store?" asked Erzabet, waving one hand dismissively.

"So if there were any clever family members who needed a challenge, we're negotiating to sell a… device to the Gnomes of Zurich" said Daphne "It will save them time, it's … a mill for paperwork. But the goblins need a full-time support person, and I'd expect the gnomes would be the same"

"Or worse" said Harry optimistically. "And we'll be selling cash registers, they let shops make change in seconds."

Erzabet shrugged. "who carries money?" she said, and Franz smiled woodenly.

"Are they so rich they don't carry money?" asked Harry in a whisper.

"Franky I'm not sure Great-Grandmama can afford to feed all of us" whispered Daphne.

"It seems the case" said Franz slowly "Excuse an old man," he paused for effect "That neither of you can go recruiting, as you are both, officially in prison."

"My operations manager will do the recruiting" said Daphne.

"Operations manager?" said Erzabet.

"Tracey Davis" said Daphne. "I know her from Hogwarts."

She's her best friend, and they're next-door neighbours, thought Harry. And Tracey sort-of-runs Black Books. Huh 'operations manager' I suppose.

"Well, do you want to put her up here?"

"That would draw attention" said Daphne "But conversations would be helpful."

"I can make her a portkey" said Erzabet. For some reason, that made Daphne grimace.

"How will you summon your… Operations manager?" asked Erzabet.

'I have a plan" said Daphne, and she drew her wand and concentrated 'Expecto Patronum!'

A silvery mist poured from her wand and slowly formed a silver swan, that lifted its neck and flapped both large wings.

'A swan,' thought Harry, eyeing Daphne with surprise "You got it to work!" he exclaimed.

The swan flew lazily about in mid-air, and Daphne bit her lip, concentrating.

"Twist and whisper" said Harry as calmly as he could.

Daphne visibly twisted her wand, and the swan glided over to Daphne and bent it's long –serpentine – neck down.

Daphne whispered and then flicked her wand. The swan flapped its wings and flew, so quickly that Harry could scarcely see it, and by the time it was at the wall it was little more than a silver line.

"It's quite fast" said Harry.

"Swans are" said Daphne. "Faster than a stupid deer."

"My mother's patronus became the same as my fathers" said Harry.

Daphne lifted one eyebrow "How dire" she said, and smiled rather smugly, thought Harry, then said to her great-grandmother "Harry taught me, it is a tiresomely difficult spell to learn" said Daphne.

"Oh, what does his one look like?" asked Erzabet.

"Well it's quite big" said Daphne studiously innocently.

Harry sighed, drew his wand and summoned his patronus, and in a cloud of silvery smoke, the Irish elk snorted and looked about restlessly.

"Ír jávorszarvas" said Erzabet "They're quite rare."

"He is" said Daphne quietly.

The elk slowly vanished.

"Why did it go?" asked Franz.

"Nothing to do" said Harry bluntly.

A day later, Harry was getting familiar with the more derelict parts of the castle, by being bored enough to go mend them, when at dinner, Frau Farbissiner came out of the door to the kitchens, holding a letter.

"A letter for a Swan, care of Cachtice castle" said Frau Farbissiner.

"That's Daphne's" said Erzabet.

Daphne took the letter and opened it.

"She's in Zurich" said Daphne.

"To find staff" said Erzabet. Daphne nodded. "At the Binging Fondue Hotel."

"That place is revolting" said Franz, unexpectedly "Who in their right mind eats fondue for every meal."

Harry had a fair idea. Daphne frowned "I'll send her a portkey, Great-Grandmama?"

"I'll make one tomorrow" said Erzabet "I tire of the day."

-==0==-

Tracey sat in a Swiss cafe, sipping espresso, and wearing a black cap.

Commandant Vinges sat down next to her, and put his uniform cap on the counter.

"Miss Davis, I presume?"

"Commandant Vinges" said Tracey.

"Black Books is looking for someone to manage our Zurich office" said Tracey "We need someone honest, who can manage people, and will work the way Black Books works."

"Which means what?"

"We employ witches whose employment choices are … unwholesome" said Tracey. "Due to their families being associated with certain political groups."

"Is Black Books an attempt to fund certain families?" asked Commandant Vinges.

"No, it's an attempt to give people an option that's not selling their bodies" said Tracey. "The founders of Black Books don't advocate political causes"

"But are in my prison" said Commandant Vinges.

"For now" said Tracey "They cannot be held forever, and they did not operate the car in front of muggles."

"That is a matter under investigation, I cannot comment on it" said Commandant Vinges.

"Well, my best friend and her husband are in your prison" said Tracey "However, they tell me, through their family, that you are an honest man"

"Is this an attempt at a bribe to an ICW official?" asked Commandant Vinges.

"Of course not" said Tracey. "But the job pays eight hundred a year plus bonuses, ordinary working hours, and is in Geneva, not Nurmengard."

"I could... see my children's quidditch matches and be home every night" said the commandant "A tempting offer."

"During the early phases of starting the office, longer hours might be required" said Tracey "We have clerks working in shifts, so the accounting front office can receive customers early and late, seven days a week."

"That seems extreme" said Commandant Vinges.

"If you run a cobblers, when can you go to your accountant?" asked Tracey rhetorically. "The clerks make two hundred a year and live in an apartment over the office. We would be looking for a similar sort of building, with a house or apartments over the shop"

"Many commercial buildings are like this" said Commandant Vinges "And I have to warn you, there are many accounting firms in Geneve"

"That is not our primary reason for the store" said Tracey "The rest is commercial in confidence, and you would find out when hired, having signed a non-disclosure agreement."

"If it is illegal, you should tell me now, I can arrange for you to get more favourable judgement" said Commandant Vinges.

Tracey chuckled "Oh Merlin, we don't DO anything illegal. Daphne would be down on us like a angry hippogriff, half his friends are ex-aurors or in the best friend is an undersecretary, and these days she comes around the office."

"Oh. That's... unusual."

"She's dating our lead artificer." said Tracey. "Who will be seconded to the Geneva office. We intend, and this is not company confidential, to lease cash registers to businesses at reasonable rates."

"We have some of that in Genvea already. People saw what Black Books did in London" said Commandant Vinges, with a small nod.

"Well that's hardly a surprise" said Tracey. "Again, we've got more going on than that. And never anything illegal. We have Mr Arthur Weasley working for us as a consultant, he used to be head of the Misuse of Muggle artefacts office."

"So something muggle, for accounting then" said Commandant Vinges.

"I simply won't say, Commandant Vinges" said Tracey "But, tell me, Singerstrasse or Tellerman for our office?"

"Singerstrasse is where I would expect such a shop" said Commandant Vinges.

"Most people would then?"

"Yes, I think so"

"Then I expect our office will be in Singestrasse" said Tracey "I'll have to go check both of the building for lease."

"Buy, don't lease" said Commandant Vinges "The landlord will raise your rent if you make large profits."

"That's rude" said Tracey, finishing her coffee.

"Tell me, Miss Davis, why does a young witch work for an accounting firm owned by her best friend?"

"Its indoor work, and I can use my imagination" said Tracey.

"In accounting?"

"You'd be surprised" said Tracey. "I'll talk to the London staff, and we'll extend you an offer."

"You can decide?"

"I'm operations manager, and my employer is incommunicado" said Tracey.

"Incarcerated" said Commandant Vinges.

"Until the ICW autumn session" said Tracey.

"If they are lucky" said Commandant Vinges.

"Well, I'll have to make sure they are lucky then" said Tracey. "Owl Tracey Davis at the Binging Fondue Hotel"

Commandant Vinges shuddered.

"I'm embracing Swiss culture" said Tracey.

Commandant Vinges took his hat and left.

Tracey raised her hand "Another espresso" she said.

-==0==-

Tracey portkeyed into a stone tower, and landed with a thud, she got up off the floor and dusted herself off.

She opened the creaking wooden door and walked down the stone corridor, stopping at the sound of childish squealing, and opening the door, into a room with four four-poster beds and a number of six and eight-year-old children running around, surrounding two squashy arm-chairs, where Harry and Daphne sat, reading books.

"AUNTY TRACEY!" shouted a girl, and Tracey was mobbed by children demanding to know where she'd been, when she'd got here, and if she'd bought sweets.

"Help" croaked Tracey, covered in six-year-olds.

Daphne looked up from her book "Oh, you're here" she said "How was the trip to Genevea"?

"International portkeys su – Aren't very nice." she replied.

Daphne poked Harry, who cast a spell, and winced "Deafness is not a curse" he noted "Tracey, good to see you. Children, let Tracey go, she probably doesn't have sweets."

"Did you two deafness curse yourselves?" asked Tracey.

"I did not" said Daphne "That would be irresponsible."

Harry shrugged.

"How's the old bat taking this lot?" muttered Tracey

"She finds it tiring."

"Any cousins volunteering yet?" asked Tracey.

"We were waiting for you before calling them in for a little party."

"A PARTY! A PARTY! WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A PARTY!" screamed some small children.

"A party just for grownups." said Harry.

"No dear, my cousins have never met our children." said Daphne

"We want them the work for us, not flee to Thibet" muttered Harry.

"I'm sure that given suitable motivations, such as… never seeing a sweet again till they're thirteen and can go to Hogsmeade and buy their own, our children can behave" said Daphne.

Caph stilled, and her eyes grew large as saucers "You wouldn't'" she said, mouth turning down.

"Pay no attention to her" said Harry idly. "Caph, that doesn't work forever, adults are not stupid"

"Yes they are" muttered Caph.

"So, what do you think of Commandant Vinges?" asked Daphne.

"He implied that he thought the job offer was a subtle bribe" said Tracey

"He seems like Black Books material" said Harry. "Honest, straightforward, and He's met the children, effectively."

"Was concerned that Black Books would be engaging in illegal acts, or was funding older political movements" said Tracey. "Is there coffee?"

"Only instant" said Harry sharply.

"Anyway, he did like the idea of being home to watch his children play quidditch, that sort of thing"

"I wonder what Madam Commandant Vinges will think of it?" asked Daphne.

"I expect we'll find out in a day or so" said Tracey.

It took three days for Commandant Vinges to announce his resignation.

-==0==-

The next day after lunch, Harry opened the Daily Prophet, with a due sense of dread. Nothing on the front page about them, so far, so good.

The fourth page, however, had 'The Black Family's dangerous secret.'

'Sources close to the ICW reveal the Black family have blackmail material so potent, that anyone in a position of power can be influenced. The Black family consists of Harry Potter-Black (see page 8 for a full biography of the man who won. Currently serving a life sentence in Nurmengard) Daphne Black nee Greengrass ( see page 11 for a biography of the current matron of the Black family, also serving a life sentence in Nurmengard) and their six children. (see page 12 for complete list).'

"Six Children?" said Harry mildly "Children, one of you has been missed out. And they didn't factor in Teddy."

Daphne turned pages

"Estelle has been left out" said Daphne, and she evidently made eye contact with Estelle "Sorry dear, we know you exist, even if some idiot at the Daily Prophet doesn't"

"Is there a fedellyus on me?" asked Estelle.

"No, just a lazy journalist" said Daphne. Harry drew his wand and cast a fairly obscure spell to detect Animagi. No glowing blobs appeared, so Rita Skeeter wasn't at Čachtice up to her old tricks.

"What?" asked Daphne.

"Lazy journalist reminded me of Rita Skeeter. She's an animagus beetle, uses it to snoop on people. Hermione kept her in a jar for while to teach her a lesson" said Harry.

Daphne muffled an unladylike snort. "There's a reason she's feared" said Daphne.

"Come on" chided Harry "She's a quite… reasonable witch. Mostly."

Daphne raised one eyebrow.

"Not in front of the children" said Harry. Daphne smiled briefly.