Somehow Edward and I decided that he should be the one to wake me every hour, and that's how I wound up curled in my bed with Edward sitting in my window seat like a breathing gargoyle. I sat with my back against the headboard, staring out through the gauzy fabric that draped over the curtain rods of my bed. The only light that was illuminating my room was the barely visible morning light that had begun to shine, and the white Christmas lights that zigzagged like stars above me and wrapped down the left side post to connect to the extension cord. I was silent ever since we arrived back in my room. Edward had helped me into my bed, and I pulled the patchwork comforter up around me to revel in its warmth. After a moment I broke the silence that hung in the air between us with a small clearing of my throat. "Thank you… for this, and well… everything else."
Edward seemed to hesitate like he was trying to gauge my sincerity, then took a small breath in and exhaled his words with almost relief. "Of course."
"I'm serious… I know that I'd probably have sat in my car for hours after that dance." I threaded the drawstring of my hoodie through my fingers before sighing. "How long do I have to stay up to prove I'm okay to go back to sleep?" We were officially on our third round of wake-up, and thankfully Edward was indestructible because throwing things upon waking was my reaction the first two times. Both times Edward had to gently shake me to raise me from my sleep, and both times I desperately wanted to fist fight him.
"Um, just until I'm sure you're not getting worse." He shifted in the seat and rested his back against the window. "You sat up fine, you aren't slurring, I'd say you're good for another hour."
"How much longer do we have doing this?" I glanced at the digital clock on my bedside table. It read in bright green numbers, 6:45am.
"Just until you're ready to get up for the day." He looked down at his hands, making it clear to me that he felt just as awkward sitting in here as I felt with him sitting in here.
"No I mean. How many days? The whole weekend? Just today?" I couldn't tell what answer I was hoping for, and in turn I wasn't sure what Edward was hoping for either.
"However long you want to." He glanced up at me before averting his eyes down again. The action seemed strange to me, it wasn't like he hadn't spent countless nights laying right beside me while I slept while we were together, what was different about sitting on my window seat? That's when it dawned on me, he must be flying blind right now.
"It's the concussion. Isn't it." I crossed my legs, now too awake to fall asleep easily.
"What?" His gaze flipped up, eyebrows knitting together curiously.
"You're acting weird because my brains are scrambled like an egg and you can't gauge my thoughts." I shrugged my shoulders and pulled my extra pillow from beside me and hugged it to my chest.
"No," Edward laughed, shaking his head and looking back to his hands, "and we don't have to talk about it right now."
"When then?" I felt like looking at him was almost like challenging him when he was like this, so instead I cast my eyes to the comforter that sat rumpled around me from my restless legs.
"In the morning." He conceded after a moment of consideration.
"Well… it's morning." The attempt to reign in my attitude was a lost battle as I countered him anyways. With a quick glance I confirmed it was now 7 on the dot. The sky had began to lighten even more considerably, causing the dense fog that had settled on the morning to create a gray-white haze across everything. Oddly enough it hadn't began to snow yet, but the chill of winter had already gripped the town and turned the roads to ice.
"Ara…" Edward's voice was a plea, one that brought me pain to think about. It was the same tone as when I left him at the end of the driveway all those months ago.
"Please Edward, don't leave me in the dark." I didn't want to keep fighting with him the way that we had fought in the past, I didn't want to keep getting hurt.
"I don't mean to… I just don't want to upset you." Something in my voice must have broken him in that moment, because he made his way over to me, sitting on the edge of my bed and gripping my hand that had been picking at the seam of my pillow case.
"I'm a big girl." I said, keeping my eyes pinned on his hand, if I focused hard enough I could almost see the faint glimmer I had gone so long without. "Besides, might as well get it all over with now anyway."
"Are you sure?" Now his words dragged my eyes up. I felt the gentle touch of his fingers along my jawline, almost as if he couldn't help but touch my face with tenderness when we were at this distance.
"Absolutely." My voice was barely a whisper, but I knew it didn't matter. My heart thundered in my chest as I yearned for a connection I had just lost, but I felt the rational mind that lived deep inside me stir. A reminder that while I had never stopped loving him, he still had hurt me and my father. Maybe being alone for a while wouldn't hurt… even if I don't stay too far away from him. The hope that my concussion was scrambling my thoughts to him struck me throughly, and I let my eyes drop sheepishly back to his hand where it entrapped mine.
After a moment of silence he dropped his hand from my jaw before sighing. "Last night gave Rose an… idea." His tone made it seem like it was a less than favorable idea to him.
"Okay…?" I buried my chin into the pillow, stared at him over the edge of it, and shifted to my side to face him while also sliding further into my bed, the exhaustion gripping me once more.
"She was thinking…" He heaved a sigh and tipped his head back against the post to stare at my makeshift stars. "That maybe, should the situation ever rise again, especially in this town while you live here… you could perhaps erase or rewrite the memories of those who inquire about us a little too closely." He squeezed his eyes shut like he wanted to wipe the thought from his head.
"Wait like I'm the men in black or something?" I raised my head, perhaps a little too fast, and stared at him.
"Essentially." He kept his eyes shut, possibly trying to sift through my egg brain. "An example would be if one of Carlisle's coworkers notices he isn't aging and looks a little too young. You would somehow make that not be the case anymore."
"So I'm the men in black and the mafia!?" I laughed loudly before covering my mouth and holding my head in regret. "I'll have to pass for now I guess but I'm not gonna say no. I guess it is gonna have to depend on the situation." I burrowed deeper into the pillow but kept my eyes trained on him.
"You took that surprisingly well." He laughed softly before peeking out the corner of his eye at me.
"Blame my poached brain. I'm sure I'd have more to say if I wasn't so-" my words cut off with a long yawn, and I felt the bed begin to shift and Edward slowly pulled his hand away. "No." I grabbed as tight as my tired body could. "Stay." I kept my eyes trained on him as he fixed his on me.
"Arabella… we aren't…?" Confusion filled the black depths of his eyes, he was like a deer caught in the headlights when he made eye contact with me. Trapped by what I did not know, but I felt trapped just the same.
"No, but it's a lot less creepy sleeping with you next to me than across the room." I mumbled, my eyes drifting shut as I felt him settle back onto the bed and trace his fingers along my face, pushing a fallen strand back. Maybe he does love me. Maybe I do still love him… I thought to myself, relishing in the solitude that was brought about from my hard boiled noggin. Or maybe it's just loneliness speaking. Another, more rational, part of my brain chimed. While my brain duked it out on its own terms I slowly drifted off again while Edward hummed lightly out of what seemed like habit.
I felt a kiss press to my forehead that startled me awake, and when I gasped and pulled back I saw my father cringing back. "I'm sorry hon, I just got in and I ran into Angela last night at Donnie's." My heart shattered as I realized she had kept our after dance plans but left me out of them. Granted I didn't think I wanted to be a part of that particular plan anymore.
"Yeah…" I grumbled as I curled further in my blankets. I realized a few things in that moment, dad couldn't see the bandage on the other side of my face, I had only been asleep for about thirty minutes, and Edward was still in my room. A small panic rose in my throat as I attempted to hide my injury.
"I heard what happened." He sighed and settled onto my bed next to me. "Honestly, I was half expecting to walk in here and see you and Gaia cuddling." He chuckled, brushing his slightly calloused hand across my hair. "I swear your hair just never stays in its bun when you sleep."
"Yeah yeah yeah." I swat at him playfully.
"So where is Gaia this morning?" He looked around my room, which had lightened significantly despite the fog.
Panic gripped me suddenly, how would I lie my way out of this one? "We uh… had a fight." I settled, still wondering where Edward could have slinked off. The notion that he was hiding under my bed forced me to surpass a laugh with an awkward cough.
"Oh honey I'm so sorry." He dipped down and gave me a hug. "How about I go and take a shower and feed Maddie and then I can make you some of the Jack's Famous French Toast?" He pulled away and gave a smile, which made me realize he was still in uniform, and that he must have just gotten home.
"I would love that dad." I jumped up without thinking about it and threw my arms around him, grateful of my father being who he was.
"Oh my god Ari, what happened to your head!?" Dad pushed back from the hug and grabbed my face with a bewildered look in his eyes.
"I fell…" I said sheepishly, feeling my cheeks change to a deep shade of scarlet.
"And you don't have a concussion? This bruise is huge!"
"Bruise!" I reached my hand up and flinched as I touched where the bandage sat.
"Arabella, you have got to have a concussion, why didn't you call me! You can't sleep like that after one!"
"Dad! Voice." My head had begun to pound as his voice raised to the concerned tone I had gotten to know so well over the years.
"Please tell me you were waking up every hour, that there's someone in the house that was helping you. Please tell me you weren't being reckless." Through all his words I could hear what remained unspoken. He was begging me not to leave him too, begging me to be more careful and remain safe.
Just as I began to answer I heard my closet door slide open. "She wasn't being reckless sir… I've helped my dad watch for concussions before with my brother Emmett so I told Ara I would watch for her."
"Doctor Cullen said it was level two." I added quickly, hoping it would boulster my case.
My dad seemed to go through several emotions before landing on calm and collected. "Jesus kid, how did you manage that?" He tore his eyes away from the boy who had just stepped from my closet and focused back on me.
Quick thinking was the only thing I had in my favor, unfortunately my reasoning skills weren't working in my favor. "So does this mean I'm off the hook for Edward being in here or…." I trailed off.
"I'll get back to you on that one." He pointed to me before turning again. "Meanwhile, Edward, why don't you join us for breakfast." The smile that broke out over my fathers face was one I had seen weaponized against my first boyfriend, though that had been a case of cheating.
"Oh I'm fine sir, I should probably get home." This was the first time I saw fear of the non life threatening kind register in Edward's eyes. Whatever my father's thoughts where, it was enough to shake even an indestructible immortal being.
"I insist." Even then dad brought a chill to my spine.
"Yes sir." Edward nodded as my father stood and walked from the room.
"Oh," Dad paused at the door and knocked it with his knuckle, "and keep the door open." He chuckled as he walked out of the room and down the hall to his room.
After a few minutes of silence I released a breath I didn't realize I was holding. "What. The. Hell!" I threw my pillows at Edward with every word.
"You weren't going to get out of that Ara! I could hear your thoughts and they were not going to save you." He picked up each of the pillows and walked back over to my bed, dumping the pillows in front of me. My mouth went dry as I stared at him.
"You… heard?" I could feel my heart thunder in my chest as I replayed the conversation from earlier in the morning.
"I did." He gave a tight smile and sat at the foot of my bed.
"Everything?" I whispered, now imitating a deer caught in headlights.
"Yes." He nodded, trying to suppress a laugh. "I did try to tell you." He officially began to laugh, I'm sure because of the look that seemed to have permanently adhered to my face.
The conversation replayed in my head. He did say no… oh my god he said no. I bit my lip and looked at the floor as I began to reevaluate my decisions. "Oops?" Was all I managed to squeak out before Edward began laughing. "Okay but at least tell me it was one of those days where you could hear my thoughts but they aren't really all that clear and so you just happened to not fully understand them!" The words fell out of my mouth in a rush as I looked back at his face, which was tipped back as he continued to laugh a hearty laugh.
"Oh I heard every word." Edward finally spoke as he giggled here and there. "Though your face is true entertainment in all of this."
"Oh shut up." I mumbled, grabbed my phone, and threw my blanket off myself. "I've got to go to the bathroom." I slid myself to the edge of the bed before planting my feet on the ice cold wood floor. My body felt stiff and like I could benefit from about a thousand hot baths, but that would have to wait until after breakfast. As I made my way to the bathroom I mulled over the events of the last twenty four hours, and found myself baffled that this time yesterday my life was entirely different. While I sat in the toilet I pulled my phone from my hoodie pocket and began texting Gaia. It was just a quick "how are you" text, but I hoped it would open the lines of communication up all the same.
Once I left the bathroom and found my way back to my bedroom, I stared at Edward who had settled back into the window seat. "So what's the plan?" I sighed and leaned against one of my bed posts.
"Let him think I fell asleep just now because I'm so exhausted from getting up every hour to make sure you were okay." He motioned around to the bench seat that he had fashioned into a makeshift bed. "Convince him I was sleeping here all night."
"Edward… I can't do that to him again." I didn't want to say the word, it felt dirty after last night.
"I don't mean compel him. He loves you Ara, he really would believe just about anything you tell him right now." He shook his head and gave me a smile. "Besides he doesn't think you've got the capacity to lie with a concussion right now. Some memories from when you were a kid?"
"Look I didn't mean to confess that time, he tricked me. Honestly it was a breach of my constitutional right to not self incriminate." I shot back immediately, jumping to my own defense as the memory resurfaced in all its hazy glory. Edward knocked his head back in laughter, and the sound felt like magic to me. I stamped down the feeling and stretched my arms. "Whatever, you fake sleep I am going to find my dang slippers." I waved my hand at him and walked to my closet to begin digging in the pile of shoes for my comfy slippers. Just as I located them my phone gave a hard ding to indicate a text message and my dad knocked on the open door.
"Breakfast kiddo."
