Thanks for the review, Magus! I hope you and everyone else reading this will enjoy this next chapter…
Chapter 10
Wolverine had climbed halfway down the old metal fire escape before he froze. What in hell was he doing? Flight or fight had taken hold and he felt the cage of realization crashing over him. It seemed perfectly natural to rush out of an intense and uncomfortable revelation. Just how many times had he done this?
He dropped to the ground, and rushed towards where his Harley was waiting. Chrome gleamed in the light of the rising moon. Overhead the stars were twinkling into being, following the surrender of the sun. "Yer doin' it again, ya damn coward," his animal self told him. "She's gonna HATE ya."
"But…" his human side protested. He reached the clearing, and dug in his pocket for his keys.
"But nothin'. Yer runnin' out on her, and she's hurtin' bad. Who flamin' CARES how old she is? She's legal in all states for this kinda thing. She smells adult, acts adult, and loves ya bad attitude, claws and all. So WHY are ya bolting?" the Wolverine side insisted.
"Because, I gotta think… she's… it's so sudden… goin' from daughter figure to lover ain't something I can easily do," Logan growled at himself as he shuffled across the lawn and glanced down for any sign of nosy persons. What he most feared were repercussions from Emma Frost.
"Yer a man, but yer also an animal, an' a thinkin' an' feelin' being. And she's hurtin badly right now. Now's not the time t' be squeamish. Go an' take her if ya want her so badly, ya know ya do! Do ya wanna lose her to those sorry excuses for friends she has back there?" Wolverine ranted to Logan.
"Damn it all," he mumbled. "Yer a coward, Logan, plain an' simple. How many times have ya let her down? Last time ya left look what happened…"
"But you promised her that it was all or nothing… had to be done right…" Logan added. "Don't wanna create more problems. She's too damn young…"
Anger and self-loathing for leaving the one he most wanted to be with poured into his gut. Suddenly he froze, unwilling and unable to move forwards or backwards. Flattened against the wall, he gave way to his inner turmoil. This wasn't right. He was a man… she looked up to him. There were so many reasons WHY he should leave.
Yet there were countless ones that said he should not. One reason dawned on him; he had left his jacket in Jubilee's closet. This provided an all too convenient excuse for him to return when she challenged him. Frost did expect that he would spend the night, so he would make darn sure that she kept on believing it if he was going to do what he thought.
"Great, just perfect…" he ranted silently.
"If it were 100 years ago, you and she could be married without any fuss an' bother. You know as well as ANYONE that women LESS than she was were married and had kids on the way on the wild frontier…" Wolverine pointed out. He sprinted back to the fire escape, and leapt up. Quickly he shimmed up towards the second floor window where the balcony of his guest quarters were
"The hell with this," he mumbled. Concern for Jubilee's welfare overrode Wolverine's sense of what 'should be'. Jubilee needed him that was clear. To totally cut her out of his life with a long range promise seemed cowardly instead of facing his feelings. Was he man or beast? Surely he could control his passions long enough to properly 'court' her and leave her room to do what she wanted. Also, he didn't trust the Gen X'ers an inch. There had to be some way to make this work, he decided.
"Wolverine takes what he wants, remember, bub. An' the only damn reason yer holdin' back is some precious sense of 'honor' that has more t' do with yer stupid self image. So friggin what if yer 100 plus. Who flamin' cares?"
"Jean an' Scott an Chuck do. An' there's Frosty," Logan mumbled.
Swallowing hard, Wolverine inched back along the ledge towards the guestroom. He climbed over to stand on the small balcony, and kept his thoughts low and primal. Shielding with barriers that would stop Jean or Psylocke's mental probes, he entered the window. No scent of anyone, even Frost. She stayed in a separate building of the Massachusetts Academy complex.
He gathered up a spare pillow and the folded blankets, strapping them on top of his bag. He mumbled, "Probably the most damn fool thing ya did in yer life, there, Logan… but dammit, Jubes needs ya, and you've let her down way too many times…"
Minutes later he edged along the ledge towards her dormer window. The tiny balcony was in fact a fire escape, allowing him to shimmy nimbly then struggle at the latch. Strangely Jubilee had left the window open, allowing him to push it carefully inwards. He leaned in and set his bag just inside the door, then hauled himself noiselessly through the window.
She had just bared her soul yet again, and here he was, cutting out. Leaving her with two battered pieces of metal and a chain so he could 'figure things out'. How typically Logan of him. Suddenly he felt intensely weary, smelling a whiff of chemical release in tears. He could hear her breathing, and swore he heard what sounded like soft crying.
He tossed the pillow and blankets down onto the sofa opposite her bed. From her scent and breathing slow and even, he could tell that she had cried herself to sleep. Cautiously he inched his way along her littered floor and disappeared into her 'powder room', thankful that she had a private bath. What on earth would she say to him suddenly going back on his word?
Right now, he didn't care. He would think of an appropriate response later. Mumbling to himself he changed into shorts and one of his clean shirts, then left his other items neatly in the bottom of her closet. Fortunately he did not require the light of the single bulb to navigate, and reached the sofa. Something tripped him up, causing him to stumble. Muffling a curse, Logan stretched out on the sofa, and turned over a few times. The only sound he heard was the soft exhalation of her breathing, mingled with the creaking of the wind in the eaves overhead.
When he had lay there on the sofa for a good half-hour, he heard soft mumbling coming from her bed. Low moans amidst rustling and half-nonsensical words that formed into Cantonese. Rarely had he heard her speak that long forgotten part of her past. Granted Jubilee picked up languages with relative ease, but seldom spoke Cantonese except the few times he had heard her on the phone with her Aunt Hope in Southern California.
Why hadn't she ever gone there, he wondered. Perhaps because he never asked. None of his business unless she decided to tell him probably. One of these days he would get the story, if things were progressing in the way they seemed to be.
Jubilee sniffled and turned over to face the wall. She had put on an oversized pair of sweatpants and a loose jersey to sleep in as always. Quite a contrast from what he had seen in her luggage with all the silk chemises and nightgowns. Swallowing hard, he tossed back the blankets and made his way over to where she lay still. Having passed from stage 1 sleep to stage 4 she would not likely be awakened by the shifting of weight as he pulled covers aside and slid in behind her.
"What in hell am I doing?" he asked himself. Inches from the back of her head he lay his alongside hers on the same pillow. Feminine scents blurred into an olfactory miasma that was mostly Jubilee along with various beauty care products. Thankfully the bed was a full, or else this would be a bit trickier considering the differences in their body mass, adamantiumless or not.
Her slender body was cold, so he was not hesitant in shifting up behind her to give her warmth. Draping his arm around her, he folded the other behind his head. His arm curled around her belly just under her chest, feeling the rising and falling of her breathing and the beating of her heart. Hopefully he wouldn't lash out in the midst of nightmares and end up waking her in a dead panic. The night before he had slept without much incident.
Weight shifted on the bed as she backed into him. This brought a wave of fear simultaneously with a smile on his lips. Although his sensible side was screaming at him to leave, his instinct told him this would work out somehow. Relationships were messy things, and he had bitten off more than he thought he could chew. Yet the possibility of losing her to something as stupid as what almost claimed her would be far worse than sorting out a relationship in transition.
Better by far to try dating and fail, then to lose her friendship forever. Just what Miss Frost and Gen X would think if they found him there next morning would be a huge challenge. Half of him wanted to see the look on Everett or Angelo's face when they walked in and saw him still sticking around.
Warmth surrounded her on all sides it seemed. A weight pinned her side down so she had difficulty shifting in the bed. Half asleep, she debated turning over or continuing to face the wall. In that boundary between dreams and alertness she drifted. Not wanting to wake up because in dreams everything was passable. Nobody questioned her decisions or second-guessed her.
Afterimages and half memories stirred with the dimness of morning light visible when she opened her eyes slightly. Tears burned hot at the realization she would again be alone, with that ache she wanted so badly to ignore. Gritting her teeth she began the process of stuffing it all into the little box where all the other hurts hid. Instead she focussed on how deliciously warm the cocoon had grown around her. Parts of her dreams were still clinging to her, and she did not want to wake up just yet.
Steps creaked, and branches tapped against the window. She shifted a bit, then gave up because she did not want to move. Another sensation tugged at her attention. Hot bursts of air fanned the back of her neck through her long hair. Against her back something moved, and she became aware that she wasn't alone. Massive solidness surrounded her and she flinched momentarily. Had Everett or Angelo… They wouldn't dare. Maybe Jono perhaps, but he often did not wish to risk extended contact. Anyway, he would be in Paige's bed naturally, not hers.
Voices echoed distantly in the hall. A southern drawl chattered nonstop to a Hispanic accent. Voices grew in intensity, then faded. Must be Paige arguing with Angelo over something again. Just what she had no clue? Squeezing her eyes shut, she shifted under the weight restraining her, and turned over. Something tightened around her, and Jubilee yelped before a hand clamped over her mouth and jolted her wide-awake.
Her first inclination was to struggle and fight, but the feel of the hand was so familiar. Fingers reached out to touch the person lying next to her in bed. Both were fully clothed in respective bedclothes, but that was all that separated them. Her legs had tangled with muscular masculine ones, while an arm slid under her body and crushed her close.
Inside that small cavity between her lungs her heart pounded fiercely. For a moment she could swear it had skipped a beat when she realized just who was there. Lying next to her, and pressing that hand over her mouth to stifle her scream was literally the last person on the face of the earth she had expected to be there.
"Shh, easy darlin'… it's only me…" he rasped into her ear. A muffled squeal of outrage and surprise answered, which caused him to press his hand a little more firmly over her lips. Anger caused her to squirm, despite her shock, but faded with the feel of his arms hugging her tightly.
"I know yer probably pissed at me fer bein' a jackass last night, but please don't make a sound or else someone'll poke their nose inta here an' that's the LAST thing I want," he implored.
"You son of a bitch," she hissed as he released her mouth. "What the HELL are you doing back here…"
"Tryin' to make up for one of the most royal screw ups I've made," he mumbled.
"But you said… you said…"
"Yeah, go figure. Turned out I was halfway to the city, an' something just told me to turn the scoot around an' get my ass back here before ya ended up hatin' me for bailing on ya," he whispered, kissing her cheek.
"You are such a royal ass," she sniffled, burying her head into his shoulder. "I don't know if I should kick your butt or kiss you…"
"I'd prefer the latter, but wouldn't blame ya if ya wanted the former," he muttered. "Just couldn't bring myself to leave. Guess I'm getting' soft in my old age…"
"Shut up," she cried, muffling her sobs into his neck. Her whole body shook in his arms, causing him to hug her all the more against him.
"What was all that stuff about needing to sort things out, huh?" she asked, sliding her arms around his neck in a death grip that would have strangled lesser men. "Makin' me spaz out here… I mean Jeez you're gonna give ME a heart attack…"
"You've had enough let downs fer one lifetime. Figured we both needed a break," Wolverine whispered, kissing her forehead, and then rubbing her back in comforting strokes. "An' I needed to stop runnin'…"
"And deal?" she completed, laughing through her sobs. "Oh I hate you, you dorkbrain! God… you drive me NUTS."
"Same here, darlin'. Thinkin' about how close I came t' loosin' ya is what did it. It ain't gonna be easy figurin' all this out, but maybe it's better if I did it around ya instead a' rabbiting again…"
"Get a clue, you jerk… sheesh," she rolled her eyes. "What changed your mind?"
"Dunno fer sure, but it don't matter does it? Couldn't stand the thought of ya hatin' me, and losing ya in my life, Jubes," he whispered.
"I said I'd wait… an' I meant it," she said, and kissed him quickly before he changed his mind. Before she could draw away, he tuned his head slightly to the side and deepened it.
"I won't lie to ya… I'm scared to death…" he admitted, a slight frown wrinkling his features.
"Why?" she asked. "You scared of me…"
"Yeah," he whispered. "But I realized somethin' else. I was runnin' away from a fight. An' that was the worst kinda thing t' be doin'. Thought of this whole sitch all the wrong way… just hope ya can bear with me in all this…"
"If you're scared that you'll lose me or screw up, it's okay," she said. "I can live with that… I just… if you run out of me again I'll hunt ya down and kill ya."
"Fair enough. But there are some things that gotta be dealt with. An' the least of 'em involve yer friends an' Miss Frost. One of my reasons for leavin' was cause I didn't wanna make any more problems for ya then yer in now…"
"Well, you COULD tell her that you've decided to stay with me here for a few days," Jubilee said thoughtfully. "And we can work out the rest… I mean I DO have two more days till class starts on Monday… and there IS one other thing you won't haveta worry about…"
"Meaning…"
"You aren't the only one who can block her. I sorta learned a few things myself. I'm sure if we put our heads together we can get around ol' Frosty…"
"Need t' figure out some way we can talk about all this, without those yahoos buttin' in," he mumbled, kissing her cheeks lightly. "Get some privacy…"
"Well technically I'm on detention, so if I pretty much stay up here… but she's expecting you to be in your room…" Jubilee said, tapping her chin with her finger. Various scenarios for concealing Wolverine flickered through her mind. Most of them involved some rather mischievous possibilities, which made her blush.
"Simple enough. If I can figure out how to get past the best security systems in my past missions, I can sure as hell evade a psychic," he whispered conspiratorially.
"Well I could just keep you locked up here so you wouldn't run away again," Jubilee teased, leaning forwards to kiss him again.
"Ha ha," he snickered, resting his forehead against hers. For the next few minutes he let himself kiss her soundly. Enjoying the warmth of her body pressed to his before they were discovered.
