Chapter 4 – Behind These Hazel Eyes

The walk to Sean's house was quiet. It felt weird walking with him at night. Not because I was afraid of him or anything, but because he was Sean Cameron. Not the "thug" people tend to refer to him as, but the guy who could get any girl he wanted. He was gorgeous, I'll admit it, but he wasn't arrogant like the others.

Sean Cameron was a gorgeous and thoughtful guy.

I just wish he knew it.

x-

I opened the door and let Terri in first. I took my jacket off and threw it on the counter while Terri made herself comfortable on the couch.

"Nice place you got here."

"Thanks," I laughed, "It's not much, but it keeps me going."

I took ice out of the freezer, put it in a plastic bag, and wrapped it in a thin washcloth.

"How are you and Ellie doing?"

My heart felt like it had stopped beating. Hearing her name made me feel terrible. The way I treated her…

"What do you mean?" I asked, walking over to her and handing her the ice.

She put it to her lip and continued talking.

"Aren't you two dating?"

"Yes, well, sort of, I mean… we broke up."

Damnit Cameron! Why did you tell her that? You barely even know her. What if she goes and spreads it around the school. I mean, she is friends with Paige, and that girl can defiantly spread the word around.

"I'm sorry," Terri said sympathetically, "Do you mind me asking why?"

"No, I don't mind. I was just an idiot, and I let her go."

x-

I saw that he was upset talking about it, but I saw no true sadness in his eyes. I was confused. They were always together. Wasn't he in love with her?

"Do you love her?"

Damnit Terri! Why do you always have to be so straightforward? Think about what you say before you say it!

"Don't you think that's a little personal?"

"I know, I'm sorry. Sometimes I don't think about what I say before I say it, and I end up making a complete ass of myself."

Sean laughed, and sat on the table facing me.

"It's ok. I understand about the whole watch-what-you-say-before-you-say-it deal."

x-

It wasn't until now that I realized how truly pretty Terri was. I'd always noticed her, but hadn't really noticed her. Jay always referred to her as "the fat girl." I always defended her, but she never knew it and probably never would. Hell, I didn't even know why.

"I guess I should probably head home," Terri said ending the silence, "My dad is probably worried out of his mind."

"Yeah, he probably is. I'll walk you out."

I got up and walked over to the door. I then opened it, and held it for her to pass through. She was still sitting on the couch.

"Terri?"

She jumped at the sound of my voice and quickly looked over at me. I saw a tear slip from her eye before she quickly wiped it away, and try to hide it with a smile. She got up from the couch, setting the bag of ice on the table, and walked over to me.

"Terri? You okay?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I'm--"

Terri jumped forward and I grabbed her before she fell to the ground.

x-

I held onto Sean's shoulders and pulled myself up. I looked at him with my cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

"Shit, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I think I tripped over a—" I stopped talking for a minute and looked down at the open beer bottle on the floor. "—a beer bottle."

I looked back at him and saw his face turn bright red with embarrassment.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry! I thought I cleaned everything up!"

"It's ok. Don't worry about it."

"I know, I know. It's just--"

He opened his mouth to continue what he was saying, but quickly closed it.

"It's just what?" I asked.

He shook his head and looked down at the floor. "It was nothing. Never mind."

I sighed and we stood there for almost a minute before I broke the silence.

"So, uh, are you gonna let go of my arms anytime soon?"

He looked at our arms and after realizing he was still holding onto me he quickly let go. I only tried to lighten the mood. I didn't mean to embarrass him even more.

I apologized. "Well, I'm gonna go. Bye Sean."

I walked out the door before he had a chance to respond and let the door close behind me. I sat down on the steps, and rested my head in the palms of my hands. I had embarrassed myself again. When in is this night going to end? I thought about when I had cried in his apartment. When he asked me what was wrong, he actually sounded…. concerned. Should I go back in there and tell him what was really wrong? I thought about it and decided I should.

I got up and turned around to knock on the door, but instead I ran right into the body of Sean Cameron.

"I, uh," I stammered, "I forgot something."

His faced leaned into mine. He whispered, "Me too."

I felt his hot breath on my cheek before he looked into my eyes. He leaned in again and before I had a chance to react he touched is lips to mine.

A/N. I know, I know. I'm a slow updater. I've just been really busy lately. School's a bitch. Anyway, I hoped you liked this chapter. PLEASE review! I'm begging. Graveling, if you will… If have any thought on the outcome on the story, criticism on certain parts you didn't like or were terrible written, let me know:D