Disclaimer: I own nothing; it all belongs to J.K.Rowling. I'm just borrowing the characters to play with for a while. This is for pleasure only, no profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Nicholas began, "Professor Potter?"
Harry raised an eyebrow. "Alright, but be careful."
"You know me," Nicholas said with a guilty smile.
"Yeah, I kinda do," Harry said with a smile. He turned towards the armed staff members, "Okay guys. Headmaster, Professor Granger, Professor Snape, Professor Malfoy. You all come with me. Old St. Nick and Professor McGonagall can keep the kids busy." Harry got one of those smiles that would make Death Eaters wet their pants. "You guys want to feel something cool?"
Professor Snape remembered that question from his youth and blurted out "No!" as quickly as he could. Albus, Hermione, and Draco were all in the process of replying negatively when the five staff members all fell through the solid floor, only to come freefalling from the enchanted ceiling. The students all stopped and stared at the sight of their professors and Headmaster shrieking like little girls, with the exception of Professor Potter, who was whooping with delight. Professor Snape managed to invert himself and fall face first back through the floor, while Professor Malfoy did his best to run in place on air. His efforts were futile, though extremely comical for the rest of the staff and students. This time when the five staff members fell through the floor they did not come back, but the absence of girlish shrieking seemed to trigger the laughter many students were holding in.
Nicholas allowed the students to settle down. He then instructed Dobby to inform the house elves of what was happening and to ask him if they needed help preparing meals the muggle way. He conjured up many muggle board games, even setup a poker table, and advised all the students that were falling behind in their studies to take advantage of the current situation. When it became apparent the students had accepted the absence of magic and were entertaining themselves, he approached the Deputy Headmistress. "Professor McGonagall," he began slowly. "A situation beyond Hogwarts next two days has come up and I was hoping to discuss a delicate matter with you."
Minerva couldn't help but blush in shame. "Wouldn't this be better postponed until we have some privacy?"
Nicholas smiled. "Perhaps, but I think we can get by with a localized silencing charm, while keeping an eye on all the little miscreants here. And before you get too scared, it is not at all about what you're thinking."
Minerva acquiesced and sat down next to Nicholas at the staff table.
Nicholas cast a couple spells around them and began. "Forgive me for prying, Minnie, but you do so well with children. Your cat instincts have you completely protective of your Gryffindors and I wonder why you've never had children of your own?"
Minerva looked surprised at the conversation. "Well, I'll be honest, Nicholas. I loved my husband John very deeply, God rest his soul. And in truth, I believe my desire to have children left with him. I'm not opposed to children, but I doubt I could ever love anyone the way I loved John. And I wouldn't want a child to be the product of anything but a deeply in love couple. Of course, that's not to say," Minnie began blushing unconsciously. "Err, that is, I mean, I have needs and…"
"I've often wondered if cats will go into heat even after menopause," Nicholas said with smile. "Maybe once you're old enough, Minnie, you can tell me."
"Dear Merlin, Nicholas. You have the candor and restraint of a giant." Minnie said after paling dramatically followed by a blush.
"I am a bit blunt, aren't I?" Nicholas stated. Minerva agreed with a frown. "Well, since that is about as perfect a cue as I can find, I'll take advantage of my bluntness. Minerva, I think you should have a child."
Minnie looked left and looked right. "Right now?"
Nicholas paled. "Umm, crap. Let me rephrase that. Minerva, there is a child in need of a good home, and I believe you are uniquely qualified to raise him."
Minerva raised an eyebrow. "I teach full-time and live at a school ten months of the year."
Nicholas was ecstatic she made no effort to refuse. "That won't be a problem, as he will most likely be a student here in less than two years."
"Why me?" Minnie asked. "And why is it your responsibility to try and find a home for this boy?"
Nicholas sighed. "Because he has no one else. His parents died when he was quite young, and he has been living at St. Mungo's for years. Harry did his usual breaking the rules of magic and has managed to help heal the boy and so now most likely, the burden of keeping him from a muggle orphanage would fall to Harry. I don't think he would be the most responsible of parents, and from what I hear Simon really liked you." Nicholas ended with a hopeful shrug.
"Simon?" Minnie said with a slight smile. "He's healthy?"
Nicholas was jumping for joy inside at the slight smile. "He will be soon according to Healer Halper. And with a healthy lifestyle, he won't be welcome as a permanent resident at St. Mungo's anymore. I wish you would consider the idea. And once Mr. Potter is conscious again in a few days, he'll be going to visit Simon. Simply meet with the boy, and think about it."
"Professor Potter is unconscious?" Minnie asked with a smile.
Nicholas shook his head. "Not at the moment, but even his reserves won't hold up to completely redoing the wards around here."
"Are you sure there aren't any proper wizarding families looking to adopt?" Minerva asked carefully.
Nicholas shrugged. "According to Healer Halper, he doubts it. And there is another reason Harry and I immediately thought of you for Simon."
Minerva raised an inquiring eyebrow.
Nicholas smiled and shook his head. "Oh no. That one's a secret for you to find out when you go with Harry to visit Simon. Now to help combat the students boredom, let's go see if Professor Longbottom has some of his mom's secret recipe."
The five staff members all abruptly but gently landed in the Headmaster's office. Well, as gently as Professor Snape could land on his face at least.
"You evil bloody…" was as far as Severus got before remembering he was armed. "Grapes! Grapes! Grapes!"
The effectiveness of the attack was summarized by Harry catching the third grape in his mouth and chewing it up with a smile.
"Oh sweet merciful heavens," Draco said as he kissed the solid ground he was grateful to be on.
Albus settled himself into his chair, only to discover the custom cushioning charm on it was ineffective and it was only as warm and comforting as a normal chair. His world came crashing down around him when he went to grab a few lemon drops from his magical dish and none came from it. He nearly started wailing in despair when Harry reached out and grabbed a few Hot Tamales from the other candy dish.
Harry saw the pitiful look on Albus' face and said "Oh for Pete's sake." A wave of his hand, and Albus' lemon drop dish was overflowing with conjured lemon drops.
"Praise be to Potter. A hundred points to Hufflepuff." Albus exclaimed.
"Enough!" An irritated Hermione interrupted. "Alright Harry, so just why did you decide to nggghh…" Hermione's eyes went wide and she slapped a hand over her mouth.
Harry looked curiously at Hermione. And all the other people around him.
Severus asked, "Why can't Professor Granger talk about aaaaoooooga."
Harry looked carefully at all the portraits and doublechecked with Hogwarts that no one else was hiding or spying on them. "Only if someone who doesn't know that secret is present or listening in…"
Finally Harry noticed Draco was looking a bit more nervous than the others. Harry stared at Draco until he looked up and Harry caught and held eye contact for just a second. "You've got to be freaking kidding me!" Harry burst into laughter.
Professor Snape and the Headmaster watched the Defense Professor curiously. Hermione stepped over towards Draco and was scrutinizing him. She tried to whisper to him, "Harry igggiggguhh." Hermione stepped back pointing viciously. "Who are you!" she demanded.
Severus rolled his eyes. "I realize muggleborns are naturally a bit slower, but honestly woman, you've been colleagues for over a year and went to school together for seven more."
Hermione snapped an angry look at the greasy man and was rewarded by seeing him jump up and start smacking his arm viciously.
"Oh for the love of Salazar! I get a two-day detention as a muggle but that still works!" He was scowling and angrily glaring about 'crotch rotter Potter.'
"Severus, behave," Harry scolded in between chuckles.
"Harry, explain," Albus requested.
Harry was still snickering some and put it best as, "I'm afraid Draco has been possessed."
"What?" Severus asked staring ashen at his apprentice who was now nervously backed into a corner of the round office.
Harry's laughs came back.
Albus chided. "I hardly think this is a laughing matter, Harry."
"Oh but that's where you're wrong, Albus." Harry explained. "Because it appears that Draco, here, is possessed by himself."
Hermione didn't expect that at all. "How is that possible? That doesn't even make sense."
Harry shook his head. "I didn't think it really was possible."
"Apprentice!" Severus snapped. "Explain yourself."
"Sorry, Sev," Draco shrugged. "I'm not sure how I got here either."
Harry nodded. "And it appears the secret in question is unknown to this Draco." Harry squinted his eyes and continued to observe Professor Malfoy. "Who is clearly our Draco, and not a dimension traveler, just perhaps a little… younger?"
Draco smiled and shrugged, unsure himself. "Sounds about right to me. I just kind of realized I existed a while back, but was on the wrong side of my body's Occlumency shields."
"Of course," Harry said with a grin. "And the nullification field took down the active shields for the first time." Harry frowned. "But that still doesn't explain your existence. Schizophrenics don't make back-ups of themselves, they create new personalities. Trust me. I've done some research on the subject."
Draco frowned in thought. "I'm not certain, but I think I came from my diary."
Albus guffawed loudly while Harry just looked at him in shock. Harry broke the silence. "You have got to be kidding me." Harry shook his head in exasperation. "Albus? Did Draco seriously manage to accidentally split his soul?"
Albus frowned but was chuckling. "It certainly appears so." He began waggling his finger at Draco. "This is why you should not practice Dark Magic! It's too dangerous."
Severus grumbled, "Only in the hands of idiots." He paused and added, "Or Gryffindors."
"Oi!" possessed Draco yelled. "I am not a Gryffindor."
Harry sighed. "Oh please, Draco. You're even more Gryffindor than I am Slytherin."
"Could someone please explain to me what's going on?" Hermione asked loudly, tired of being left out of the loop.
Harry looked at her. "Remember second year? Ginny and Riddle's diary?" Harry asked rhetorically and continued. "Well, I would imagine Lucius taught Draco how to make a diary and Draco didn't quite realize what he was doing."
Draco's shoulders dropped and he was frustrated damning his 'wankerish bloody wanker of a useless ponce' father.
Hermione did a pretty good impression of Albus with just a shell-shocked guffaw at Professor Malfoy. "Oh Merlin. Someone needs to revoke his permission to practice Dark Arts."
Draco rolled his eyes. "One little mistake and everybody's a critic over every little thing."
Harry shook his head. "Were I not quite glad to be dating Ginny, I'd be tempted to see what fate would do to these two together."
Draco made a pained face. "It would take more than a flea dip before I'd even con- aauuuuuggghhhh!" Whatever else Draco was going to say was lost as he fell to the floor in unbearable pleasure.
Severus quietly observed with a passive face. "You know, it's so much easier to deal with pain, and to get used to it and block it out. Pleasure is far more devious and vindictive. I think I may have preferred Tom's Cruciatus even."
Harry and Albus shared an evil maniacal look. Harry's teeth were showing in an animalistic grin. "Amateurs."
Severus, Draco, and Hermione all shuddered at the emotions in the air.
"Anyways, Draco," Harry began. "I'm sorry to say we're going to have to get rid of you. The proper Draco who should be in control of that body has lost a piece of his soul by accidentally making you."
Draco gulped and said nothing.
"But we're going to have to wait until your, or his, shields and magic are back. So in the meantime, accept this hex or… or else." Harry finished with a shrug. He cast his familiar purple knowledge suppression hex and waited until the spell was complete and bound to him. Draco seemed to not even consider refusing the hex. "Okay we can talk freely again," Harry said.
It was as if someone just flipped a switch in Hermione. "What the hell are you doing bombing away the magic in Hogwarts!"
"Err good God Hermione." Harry winced. "You must have been bursting to say that."
A flustered Hermione nodded, while an amused Albus smiled.
Draco meekly raised his hand, not wanting to interrupt the scary wizard or downright frightening witch.
Harry responded to the unasked question. "I am Nicholas Flamel, and yes this situation was a semi-planned live testing opportunity of some of our, or if you prefer my, work on Dementor Blood."
"Semi-planned?" Albus inquired.
Harry shrugged. "I didn't know Tonks was going to come to me to help me prank me."
"Oww," Severus exclaimed clutching his head.
Possessed Draco was still processing Harry's exclamation. "Wait! So you're dating the mud-gleblood?" Draco forced a weak smile and hoped his slip wasn't too obvious.
Harry nodded solemnly, "Yes, Draco I am. And since you're obviously not up to date on what you, yourself, are currently doing, I should warn you that you're dating a muggle woman."
Draco paled to the point of being practically clear and hoarsely exclaimed, "What!" before his eyes rolled up into his head and he passed out.
Albus, Hermione, and Harry all started cracking up. Even Severus was highly amused at seeing his apprentice faint. "That was cruel, Harry."
Harry smiled. "I try."
Albus adopted his stern frown and said, "Harry, explain."
"Oh right," Harry replied. "Just testing out a few things, as well as seeing if there were limits on the nullification. If it brought down Hogwarts, then for all intents and purposes the answer is: No, there aren't any limits. Nicholas has probably sent the Unspeakables away, and he wanted to speak to Minnie about something."
"Harry," Albus reminded. "You're Nicholas."
"Very good," Harry said slowly nodding. "Tell me, Albus, were you using magic to boost your intelligence?"
"Oh shush, child." Albus scolded. "Talking about yourself in the third person sounds crazy. Well, unless you're a professional Quidditch player boasting about your skills."
Harry rolled his eyes. "It's shorter to explain it that way than it is to say, 'I wanted to talk to Minnie, but in my appearance as Nicholas Flamel, and preferably in an open public setting with a lot of witnesses.'"
"Oh yes," Severus sneered. "That sounds much less crazy."
"Anyways," Harry continued ignoring the older men. "I'm going to be doing the wards, and the strain will probably knock me out for a few days. I need you all, who know the big secret to make sure I can recuperate in peace. But before I do, I knew I'd need to answer your questions, so is there anything else?"
Albus inquired, "Won't Nicholas be here?"
Harry nodded. "Should be."
Albus carefully replied, "Then if any questions come up, I shall ask him."
Harry shrugged. "Alright then. I'm headed back to the heart of Hogwarts. You may feel some strong magical shifts in the air, but that means it's working."
"Wait, Harry." Albus interjected. "Before you go, please wake Professor Malfoy, and make sure he will be okay."
Harry agreed and cast a wandless Ennervate on the unconscious man.
Draco slowly woke up and took a glance at his present environment. He looked extremely confused until the events leading up to his fainting came rushing back to him. "Oh Merlin, Potter! Tell me it's not true! Tell me I'm not really dating a… a… a woman."
