QUESTIONABLE ALLIANCE
Authors: Wicked R and Charmed-Snow

A/N: Thank you for your reviews! Here is the next chapter.

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Chapter 4: Masculinity

He pulled her down on the bed, unbuttoned her clothes and persisted with covering her with kisses on her breasts and sides. He continued to kiss downward, till he reached her most sensitive parts. God, he was good. If this was strictly about sex, he was better than Cole. And all this could be was strictly physical, since she herself had vanquished Cole, the love of her life, no matter what. Just like with every other man than Cole, she wanted him now to fk her senselessly. There was no point to teasing, no man in this world would satisfy her anyway. She reached up and pulled his trousers down, "Come on, in me, now!"

He fumbled with his boxers for a few seconds, then tried, only to find that his erection wasn't hard enough to slide in, "I can't believe this, I'm sorry. It's not that I don't fancy you, it's just…this kinda thing had never happened before, I swear…"

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. It's not you."

"We could try some more foreplay," Phoebe offered and moved to grab his sexy buttocks.

"No! I mean…I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Phoebe started to button herself up. It's not as if she wanted HIM. But she did worry about the confused and slightly distressed man next to her, "you can tell me. I won't write it into the paper, I promise," she tried to joke her way out of it.

"The Carver…" Christian whispered. Even if that meant giving away something personal, it was better to give her a reason after all, rather than let her think he did this non performance all the time. Such an important thing as his masculinity had to be defended.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," Phoebe understood right away. After all, life was even crueler, than most people knew. She put a hand on his shoulders, "I was too pushy. I apologise."

"You, pushy," Christian snorted sarcastically, "I took women to bed in less then five minutes of meeting them."

"Ah, you…getting any help with this? You know your reaction is very normal? Sexual assault is a trauma, it almost always causes some confusion or questioning about sexuality. It is important for you to know that your reactions are temporary reactions to an abnormal event," the psychologist uncontrollably came out of her, "the fear and confusion will lessen with time, but the trauma may disrupt your life for awhile. Talking about it will help you feel better…"

"I got it covered. I have friends."

"Well, you can choose when, where, and with whom, but you need to talk about it and express feelings. There's also a telephone Counselling service available if you'd prefer to remain anonymous or don't feel comfortable with going into a Counselling Center."

"I know, I know."

Phoebe also wanted to tell him how victims frequently see their assault as a loss of manhood, but she understood he didn't want to share anything with a practically stranger right now. Nevertheless, she couldn't ignore her motherly instincts and brought her arms around his neck, leaning her head on his shoulder. He let her, and they cuddled sitting up in silence for long minutes, the way she used to with Cole, memories taking her away again, "Don't you ever worry about whether you're in danger of never finding your happiness?" She asked suddenly, obviously directing the question as much as to herself, than the man.

"Of course," Christian opened his eyes wide and looked at her, "I tend to…mess up a lot. But I do want a family one day. When I find the one that will love me, childish, harebrained me. I mean, who doesn't?"

Phoebe nodded, "I appreciate your honesty. I turn, I gonna be honest too. I don't know if I will ever be that one you are looking for, but I'm willing to give it a try. But you have to know, before you find out some other way and get hurt in the process, that I went out with you because you remind me of my ex husband. I can't have him. He's dead anyway, but besides, it never worked out between us."

"Why?" Christian wanted to hear the other side's point of view, not just his father's.

"Trust issues."

"Yeah, trust issues. Same here. They are biggies. Okay, how about a trial? We go out with each other for a few weeks and if everything is going well between us, we will tell our fears to go and take a hike? And I know what we do tonight. Wait here. You want me. We don't have a condom," he lied, always having kept tones of them in his luggage, "If you still want me when I come back with it, I'm sure everything will be different. I just…need to get myself together. Don't go anywhere," he shot the door behind himself. Quickly, he shimmered down to a shop, picked up a packet of condoms as promised, not bothering to pay for it, then shimmered right to a monastery in Vietnam, finding that not even that big journey made him nauseous anymore.

"Dad?" He handed the condoms to a very confused Cole. His voice echoed in the spacious hall of the monastery. He looked around to find himself in the middle of a gathering of monks, all quietly mumbling to themselves, some casting strange looks at him. It was the surgeon's turn to be confused at the scene before him.

"Kmm…" Cole started. "You forgot you meant to make sure nobody sees you when you shimmer in. Thankfully these people are aware of demon kind," he pulled his son out of the hall and onto a similarly large corridor, "Now could you tell me what am I supposed to do with this?" He held up the pack of condoms, "It's not as if I'm in the middle of making a sister or a brother for you…"

"Phoebe's waiting for you." Christian said straightforwardly.

"What?" Cole uttered. He decided to live in this country to keep himself far away from her, and everything he'd ever known. Since there was no way he could end his own life, he'd joined Zen sect in a hope he could find peace of mind. It's not very successful though, he wasn't able to get rid of Phoebe's image and all the sweet memories they had shared. At least he could stay calm and accept the fact that she didn't want to rekindle their love now.

When the world had been converted into a utopia, Cole had come back in case they would have not realized their mistake. But Leo had helped them to find out, he was wiser than the whitelighter Cole'd known 3 years ago. Nevertheless, his Phoebe had lost faith in love, it must've been all his fault. That was when he had come to see Drake and asked him a favor considering he'd shown him a way to fulfil his wish of being mortal last year.

"Basically, she's waiting for me." Christian explained, he did know the way he said just made his father more confused, while they didn't really have much time "I'm staying in San Francisco on business. And she wanted to make an interview with me, and my partner. The point is she's right now waiting in my hotel room, and one of us should return there."

Cole was surprised, he hadn't thought they would meet each other, or Phoebe would go out, much further than going out, with a man that looked exactly like him.

"Don't you get it, dad? She's still attracted to you. If she detested you utterly, she wouldn't let me touch even her smallest finger. Who knows if you come to her with another identity, you'll get what you wish for." Christian persuaded "I bet it'll be better than sitting in meditation here."

"It's been a long time. I didn't plan to see her again. How should I do?" Cole contemplated. On one hand he wanted to jump at the chance to be with Phoebe, he's afraid he would lose himself again on the other hand.

"Oh I didn't know you have trouble with it." Christian frowned "Forgot you're older than me."

His father glared at him. He hastily defended "I mean, take your own advice. Don't hold yourself back.", realizing he had misunderstood Cole's words in a sexual way.

The half demon thought for a minute, then nodded.

"Great, now you're me. You're in San Francisco for the surgery of the major's hand. Your partner is Sean McNamara. And you're staying at Grand hotel, room 808"

After Cole shimmered out, Christian sighed in relief. It turned out to be good finally. He was glad that he could help his father a chance to pursuit of happiness.

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Cole opened the door seeing Phoebe sitting on the sofa. Hesitation glimpsed in her beautiful eyes. She'd had enough time alone to think about what had led her to his room in the first place. She hadn't totally been honest telling Christian that he looked like her ex husband, so that she wanted them to have a try and see if they matched each other. She didn't really expect to fall in love with him one day, she's only looking for the human Cole in him, she considered him the one she wanted Cole to be. A substitute, that's all she needed from Christian.

As much as her heart was pleading her not to leave, her mind told her it wasn't supposed to work out. If it kept going on, she would just get herself hurt, and hurt him along with it. She should find a completely different man and love him for himself. Speaking of getting hurt, Christian's having problems with sexuality, he's in the process of recovering from the attack, Phoebe wondered if tonight was the first time he wanted to try it again, she couldn't walk away after having turned him on. However, it devastated her when wanting him badly for her desire and realizing him not being Cole in each of his movements at the same time.

"I'm… back." Cole held up the pack.

Phoebe was fascinated, finding a familiar expression flash on his face. If it wasn't for Paige drenching him with the potions earlier, she would've wondered again. She stood up, walking towards him, pulling her arms around his neck, meeting his lips.

Before it got more passionate, Cole suddenly broke free, feeling unsure.

"Relax!" Phoebe whispered, caressing his cheek with her fingers. It wouldn't matter if she was with him tonight only, so she let herself take advantage of this chance.

They resumed their kiss softly at first, then made it deeper until all of her body started rousing when his tongue danced in her mouth. It's Cole's way. Phoebe ran her hands down, rubbing his biceps, then making her way to his buttocks, thinking Cole would hold her tighter. And the man with her tonight was tightening his arms on her waist. Her sex arose a craving for being filled. She wouldn't rush this time, they took their clothes off, getting on the bed. Phoebe made him lay down, offering him her secrets, while bending her head down to his privates. Her heart skipped a beat at the first touch, 'They're alike on any parts.', she thought. It didn't take a long time until he got fully hard. Phoebe guessed she knew his sensitive spot, no, she knew Cole's, and she just teased him right there. Yet he responded great.

Her moan choked in her throat, since her tender lips were still wrapping his erection. She went on titillating his spot deliberately, Cole shuddered, grabbing her waist "Stop, please!"

Phoebe paused, there was some game they had played in their happy time, that she would've asked Cole to hold on longer in despite of what she would've done next until he could've been allowed to come. She heard how his tone sounded now, it's hard to be convinced he was Christian. But she soon found out he had another reason for asking her to stop.

"I'm not quite sure." Cole mumbled, stirring a little.

Phoebe was disappointed, and angry. Granted this 'plastic surgeon' needed more time to regain his self confidence, it didn't mean he had all rights to play with her twice in the same day. Who was he thinking she was? Some slut? He must be thinking so, they'd known each other less than 24 hours, but she's so willing to sleep with him that waiting for him to get back and giving him the second chance to fool her again. Why should he buy the story that he looked like her ex husband? She got off, and was about to leave his bed when he grabbed her wrist.

"I'm sorry." Cole whispered, he did want to keep her on, he did want to make passionate love with her tonight, but it wasn't right. She was here because she thought he's Christian. She would never forgive him for luring her. More important than that, she would regret, and he didn't want her to regret such a thing.

Phoebe turned to look at his eyes. He didn't offend her on purpose. He was sorry, sad, and concerned. Those eyes reminded her of Cole's when she'd told him they'd been over after his return.

"It's okay." Because of this look, she forgave him.

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"Finally." Christian grinned seeing Cole materialize in his living room. He stood up, getting another glass of absinthe for his father "How is everything?"

"Good, in general." Cole answered, receiving the glass.

"Have you arranged a new date?"

"We'll go to the movies tonight."

"Sounds very promising. Your ex wife's certainly beautiful," Christian chuckled "but leading. Our tastes of women seem quite different. Plus, I'm not familiar with long relationships. Wonder why she can hold your heart that long."

"It wasn't my original plan." Cole bit his lip, "I was brought up in the world where love was considered a weakness. I had much more time than you for womanising, and I did enjoy it. Until the day Phoebe came to me. You'll never know till the woman loves you shows up. She's different from anyone before. She not only makes you feel satisfied, but loved, and happy. After that, you want her to stay, not to gather her stuff and leave. You'll never wish for anyone else, but her."

"Still trying to persuade me of finding love and building a family?"

"I just want you to think about that now and then. And don't miss your chance."

"In the light of that, I'm taking a vacation." Christian informed "I'd like to use my handy shimmering to travel around the world with Kimber. But tell everyone I'm staying in San Francisco. Then you can be Christian Troy there."

"It benefits both of us." Cole agreed, thinking about his opportunity "I surely need more time to win Phoebe's heart."

Christian refilled their glasses, "Yes. But I reckon you should read some books about plastic surgery first. Talk about appearance, I can't believe you're double my age, but you don't look a bit older than me."

"Double your age?"

"No?" Christian asked "Let see. I was born when you're in your early 20's, still at law school, right? So you should be 60."

"Double this age, yes." Cole said coolly.

"What?" Christian laughed "You're telling me you're one hundred and twenty years old? Are you ageless?"

"I do get old. But my lifetime is longer than human's. So I'm still in my young days."

"Why ain't I like you? Because my mother's human?" Christian was somehow disappointed "People will think I'm your father 20 years later."

"You just have a quarter demonic genes, that makes you almost human. Because I myself am half demon half human." Cole explained "Being ageless and having a long life are human's wish, but demons don't have freedom to enjoy this advantage and their powers. They've to serve The Source, the supreme demon of the Underworld. Furthermore, they don't have a heart to feel or love, their lives are nothing, but the succession of battles and competitions."

"I see. We all know what 'demon' means. But how come you live in a monastery if all of demons must serve their Source?" Christian questioned.

"Oh no, it's not an interesting subject to talk about. Trust me, you don't want to know."

"I do. I'm not merely curious. But it's my father's life." Christian insisted "You know I never wanted to look for my parents. I thought I was fine with my life, while my past was a nightmare, I didn't want to dig deeper into it, for fear of it being worse. Now you're here, you have me feel an attachment that closer than my best friendship. You planted a desire of having a family in my mind. After the vacation, I'll find out if Kimber is the love of my life, and I'll arrange for you to see your grandson, Matt. He's almost eighteen. We can tell him you're my brother, or cousin, but we should meet each other. And right now, I'd like you to show me the Underworld and the story of your life, father!"

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A/N : Please review!