Disclaimer: Maybe I'll own the Phantom of the Opera once I finally get paid for my cashiering services, but until then, I do not. u.u

This chapter will be shorter than normal, just because I haven't had as much time to type as normal.:

Christine was having a lovely dream. She and Raoul were in a snowy forest, listening to her father tell them stories of his travels from before they were born. As they listened to her father's words pour from his mouth, Raoul held her hand in his, so that she was warm despite the snow. Everything was perfect, and it just seemed to keep getting better, as her father moved on to a story of Little Lotte and the Angel of Music...

Until she was abruptly awoken by a loud crash and some high-pitched screaming.

Startled, she immediately pulled a robe on over her nightgown and hurried out to see what the commotion was. She walked quickly, hoping that no one was hurt, and wondering whether Raoul was alright.

She was greeted by a rather peculiar sight.

Raoul was lying on the floor, his lip gashed and puffy, and one of his eyes was turning a rather nasty black and blue. Erik was crouched on the ground, his Punjab lasso discarded to the side. He seemed to be trying to decide to help Raoul or run from the Sue, who was holding a large chair above her head in a rather menacing fashion.

"DIE, YOU LITTLE FOP!"

And with that, the chair sailed across the room, nearly hitting Raoul square in the chest. Instead, it flew harmlessly over him and landed a few feet away.

Christine stared at the scene with wide eyes. "What on earth is going on in here!"

Raoul, noticing Christine, looked at her pleadingly. "She's trying to kill me! Help!"

"DEATH TO YE!" And with that, the Sue lunged at Raoul. Thankfully, Erik managed to grab her and yank her away so she couldn't cause any more damage.

Christine hurried over to her husband's side, completely bewildered. "What the...?"

Erik, still struggling to incapacitate the Sue, tried to explain. "She showed up...and we were trying to get her to leave, but all of a sudden she started attacking the vicomte..."

"Why!"

"I don't know!"

To be honest, even Raoul didn't know. One second, the Sue was asking for a room to stay in, and the next, she was trying to bludgeon him with a lampshade.

Christine stared at the Sue, wide-eyed, as the non-canonical insert struggled to be free of Erik's grasp. "Why don't you just use the lasso!"

Erik, struggling as well, called back, "I've tried! It won't work for some reason!"

Just then, Damien and the Persian rushed into the doorway, wondering what the commotion was about. Upon seeing the chaos of the room, they blinked and stared for a few seconds until Erik snapped at them. "Don't just stand there! Do something!"

The Persian thought quickly about what to do, and tried to remember everything he knew about Sues. Suddenly, he was struck with an idea.

"Quick! Orlando Bloom is running past out house!"

"What!" The Sue paused for a second, wide-eyed, giving Erik just enough time to wrench her arm behind her back.

"Merci, daroga."