Time to bring in the goody-goody two shoes... BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! And I mess a little bit with the time line and story line. Sort of. Don't hurt me, please. Oh- and why is Alister watching Sailor Moon? I don't know... Just seemed like a good idea at the time... OH! And I owe Shirlanka-San for this idea. Told ya I'd use it! Thanks!
Part Four: Mayday, Mayday... The Mail is Going Down- Repeat, the Mail is Going Down...Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! or the Post Service. Or Alice in Wonderland. tiny reference Or anything else except what I DO own.
Clang! Shuffle... shuffle... shuffle... Rusty squeak. Sort through papers... Clang! Shuffle... shuffle... shuffle...
Dang wind! Abandoning the bag at slung over his shoulder and bouncing against his hip, Alister grabbed onto the hat worn only by those working in postal service. Dartz, the tightfisted clod, didn't pay them enough, so the three of them were forced to do other meaningless, humiliating jobs.
The wind died down and he continued on walking down the sidewalk to- thankfully- the last street. And there was only two more houses left... Smiling, for various reasons, Alister filled another mailbox full of various sizes of magazines, bills, and who know's what else. At least he didn't have Valon's or Rafeal's half-time job. Somehow, cleaning restaurant restrooms or take down snooty customer's orders in a fast food place wasn't his idea of fun.
Of course... neither was this. Being chased and ridiculed by kids or/and yapping dogs hardly bigger than one's fist was no treat.
Yes! The last house! With a triumphant, clang, the redhead hurried as fast as his aching feet would go back to the mail office where he could rid himself of the stupid canvas bag and the uniform and do some real fun... like dueling... or trapping Kaiba in an Orichalcos Seal... Or at the very least hide the uniform away before the other two got out of work.
Finally he left! And about time, too.
Typing in the order, Valon couldn't help but let his mind wander to what he'd love to do to this place... and its customers. It was actually a wonder that he had kept this job for as long as he had. "Excuse me. Hey- excuse me!"
Whipping the paper hat back over his head- dang thing NEVER stayed in one place for long- Valon glared at the annoying kid. "What?" he hissed. This shift was taking far too long. Much longer than he was used to, anyways.
"Well, geez! You don't have to be so RUDE!" The girl replied loudly, drawing the attention of nearly everyone in the fast food place. She shook her head to clear her face of brown hair and she matched the brunette's glare with her own. "Anyways- I'd like to order."
"Alright... And what do you want? Girly." A fellow coworker and cashier shook his head- their boss was going to kill Valon if he didn't learn to keep his comments to himself.
The girl's blue eyes narrowed to a slit. "What did you call me?" she hissed.
"Are you goin' to order o' not?"
Gesturing to four guys behind her- one brunette, two blondes- the girl answered 'simply,' "Four cheeseburgers- two no mustard, one without pickles, and one without both, three cokes, one diet coke and four french fries. Got all that?"
"Four cheeseburg'rs, four cokes an' four fries. Yep. Go' it," Valon replied, receiving glares from the four kids. "I'll be back in a moment- thank you for your... loud patience." Enjoying the protests- loudest coming from the girl, he turned to the kitchen workers... to find his enraged boss behind him.
"A word... Valon- if you please," Mr. Rhiney growled, eye visibly twitching.
"But Mr. Rhiney! I hav' ta fill the orders!" Valon protested. "An' you said the other day that the customers come first. Ain't that right? Hey, Bri'n- you remember, don'tcha? Right?"
"Brian can fill the orders for you. Now c'mon, kid." Just short of being physically guided to the manager's office, Valon was half guided, half pushed, to the office.
There was no way he was going anywhere near it. No way. Never in his life would he go into stall number three- where the worst that needs to be cleaned is always there.. Sorry, I can't find any better way to say that.
With a sigh, Rafeal reluctantly opened the door to the restroom stall. Thankfully, this was the last one. If the worst to clean. Adjusting the rubber gloves and mask over his face, the blond took the one bold step needed to finish with his shift.
The little pep talk went by quickly- thank goodness. He might not have his job the next day... but... oh well. Whistling his way back to his post- exchanging insults and witty comments with his boss always got him back in a good mood- Valon couldn't help but overhear the conversation of his last group of customers... Or should he say the girl's..?
"Honestly, Yugi- do you really think that Pegasus wishes us well?" The girl asked, taking a sip of her non-diet coke.
The shortest of the four- Yugi ,and hence the one that kept Valon's attention, shrugged and answered, "Why would he want us over at Illusion Headquarters for any other reason than to help us with this... problem..?"
"To try capt'ring our souls hisself?" the other blond muttered. The brunette next to him shivered at the thought.
Yugi rolled his eyes. "I don't think he's going to try."
"Besides, Joey, Yugi beat him once before, he can do it again!" The girl chirped, giving Yugi a warm glance that almost made him go completely red in the face. "So don't get too worried. Tristan- get yer hands AWAY from my French fries!"
They're going to see Pegasus! Ha! That bloke's already been takin' care of! Valon thought triumphantly to himself, adding a few snickers for the evil effect. The couple in front of the cashier looked at him warily and finished saying their order in record time- just to get away from him. But Wheeler... 'Ere- Perfect!
"So we'll be meeting him tomorrow morning at eight? And then leaving at noon again?"
Heh?
"Yep, so we should be there by seven-thirty. So try and wake up on time for once, Joey," Yugi replied dryly, ignoring the look on Joey's face.
"Seven-thirty, Yug? But I nevuh get up before noon!"
Hm. That's a problem. Valon didn't get up before noon himself. "Cost is five sixty, please," he muttered absentmindedly, trying to get this little problem fixed. "Le's see... If I use a wrench- 'ere's yer change, 'ave a nice day- to sabotage the plane... No... Oh- 'ere's yer order, enjoy. Next!. Whad about Alister..? He's off for today. Hmm... Hmm... AHA! I GO' IT!"
"Uh, sir? Are you goin' to take our order or not?"
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Alister looked up from his magazine- or should we say Rafeal's? Strange, the poor guy can hardly keep his magazines under check, huh- as the door to the room slammed open and shut in under three seconds. A very hyper, very pleased with himself Valon stood in front of him, smiling. Somehow, it was that smile that freaked the redhead out.
"What do you want, Valon?"
Valon plopped himself down on the couch next to Alister, smiling like the Chesher Cat all the way. "I 'ave a lit'le proposition for ya, Alister. Want ta 'ear it?"
"What is it?"
Smiling even more, the brunette opened his mouth to reply... and was cut off as the door sounded its slamming battle cry again. "Alister! Your 'boss' wants to talk to you!" a very annoyed Dartz growled, eyes blazing fury. Holding a hand over the receiver end, he continued in a lower voice, "He has called multiple times in the last four hours... Why the # did you give THIS NUMBER!" Still growling, he handed the phone over or should we say, thrusted it into Alister's hands?. "Please make this call short... son..." With a swish of his hair and Dartz was stalking back to wherever he had been hanging out for the day.
Ignoring the look on Valon's face- and dodging Dartz's swished hair- Alister spoke into the phone, "Hello?"
"Alister?"
"Yep. I didn't forget anything this time, sir, so what it is?"
"Your father didn't sound so good- does he have a cold or something?"
If only he did, Alister thought, but answering instead, "Uh... yeah... a pretty nasty one too."
"Oh. Well, tell him to get plenty of rest."
"I will, sir. But why'd you call?"
His boss on the other side gave a sigh, "Well... you see, Carl's gotten ill- a nasty flu, I'll bet. There's some bug goin' 'round, that's for sure- and I need someone to deliver the out-of-town mail to... Domino City. Normally, I'd have someone else do it... but they're sick too. Or fired. One of 'em."
"Uh-huh..."
"So- can you do it?"
"You want me to go to Domino City- on the other side of the country...?" What is wrong with you! "Uh... for how long..?"
"Only for a day- no longer."
Yeah, just long enough for Dartz to kill me... "Do I even have a choice in this?"
"Hmm... Nope! Looks like your goin' to Domino City, kid! Have a blast! Bye now!" Click. Alister held the phone in his hand limply- this wasn't good. If he was lucky enough not to die by Dartz's hands for lying in his mailmen job application over the home phone number and parent/guardian, then he'd die by Dartz's hands for leaving the city when the 'chosen duelists' are here. Great.
"What was that 'son' thing abou'?" Valon ventured, shock slowly, slowly, slowly wearing away. The very thought of Dartz- their BOSS- being a father was... well, disturbing. "Or did you lie on your job application too? Alister? You okay?"
"I'm going to Domino City..."
"Wha'?"
"I'M GOING TO DIE NOW OR LATER WHILE GOIN' # TO DOMINO CITY!"
"Oh... okay..." I'll take the 'lying on your application,' then...
No... there was no way he was going to make it- the fumes... too strong... Ugh... So rationalizing, poor Rafeal passed out, trying to finish his job.
Twenty minutes after takeoff, and Valon was just starting to consider asking Alister to move over so he could go search for Wheeler. He had been bugging the redhead since they had gotten on and had nearly gotten his head literally bitten off for it. Twice. As of now, he was 'resting his eyes.' Or should one say: 'trying to sleep?'
"Hey, Yug! Lookit that cloud!" The voice broke right through the brunette's thoughts, right to the very core. And echoing... echoing... echoing... echoing... It sounded... familiar...
"Which one, Joey- you already pointed out about twelve..."
Gee, that sounded familiar too... Sliding over towards the window, Valon tried to- successfully- see down part of the aisle. The two voices sounded way too close for their owners' good. Wait... that jacket looks familiar... and so does that hair style... WHEELER!
Valon straightened back in his seat, absentmindedly listening to the rest of the two's conversaiton. How did Wheeler and the Pharaoh manage to get by them without being seen? Nevermind- not important. At least he didn't have to bug Alister anymore.
Punching the back of the seat once to get the blond's attention, the brunette issued the one challenge he'd been waiting for.., "'Ey Wheeler- I challenge you to a duel! Do you accept... or are you a pansy bloke?"
"Wha? Hey!" Clearly annoyed, Wheeler swiveled around in his seat to catch sight of his challenger. "I'm not dueling- leave me 'lone, kid."
"KID!" That easily woke up Alister and alerted Yugi. "Don't you know who I am, Wheeler!" Valon demanded, oblivious to anything else. Even the other annoyed passengers.
Joey winced- that shout went right through one ear and out the other. "No, I don't know and frankly... don't care..."
"Whaddaya mean you don't care! I'm challengin' you 'ere, ya pansy!"
Joey's companion, pulled on his sleeve, easily getting his attention. "Calm down, Joey- no need to make a fuss over a little challenge..."
"Little!"
Alister gave the Australian a frosty glare and growled out, "Will you shut up, Valon, or do I have to use some duct tape?"
Valon jumped a little- ACK! Not that- and asked cautiously, "You don't 'ave any o' that with ya, do you?"
"Do you want to bet?" The redhead held the mailbag aloft slightly, grinning triumphantly. "A mailman's prepared for anything!"
Being one to be oblivious to everything, Joey glanced down at Valon, studying his face. "Hey- aren't you that cashier in Greasy Bob's Cheeseburguh Outlet?"
"So remind me again why you're sitting with little ol' us?"
Growling- these midgets wouldn't leave him alone- Seto Kaiba finally acknowledged the existence of Tristan by opening his eyes and glaring at him. NO! They're getting immune to my glare! "I'm not going to justify Mokuba's and my own presence here to you. Deal with it and leave me alone."
Tristan made a face- he's starting to compete with Wheeler who's the bigger mutt- and replied, "Geez, you don't have to go all... Kaiba on me."
"And what is that supposed to mean!"
Next to his older brother, and trying desperately to ignore the new argument in a long string of arguments, Mokuba winced. That was a sore spot- Seto loathed being compared to thier stepfather. There was only one chance that he could think of to end this now... "The Blue-Eyes we usually use to travel is broken down, Tristan- that's why we're here."
"Mo...ko...ba..."
"Sorry, bro."
"Sigh"
Tristan's brown eyes flicked back and forth between the two Kaiba brothers and a slow smile stretched across his face. Tea Gardner, who had been up to that point trying to ignore the fight and read her Seventeen magazine, shook her head. Tristan would never leave Kaiba alone when he 'got him on the run.' Which wasn't often. "So... does that mean you two are going to travel with us from now on?"
Muttering various curses in various languages under his breath, Seto Kaiba mumbled something about going to get a walk and left. Leaving Tristan calling after him and both Tea and Mokuba shaking their heads with one common thought in mind: Immature kids...
"Hey Alister... ain't that Kaiba back there?" Valon asked slyly. That ought to keep Alister from duct-taping his mouth shut.
The redhead did a double take in the direction Valon had pointed out, spotting out Seto Kaiba easily. The head of Kaiba Corps. was stalking his way down the hallway, murmuring under his breath. "Here's your duel disk, Valon- enjoy."
Yugi and Joey exchanged glances as the mailman whipped out two strange looking duel disks and handed one to his friend. Kaiba stalked past without a glance down at the four- conversing with Wheeler or Yugi was like talking to two worms; no, make that two DEAD worms- and was followed closely by Alister.
"WHEE!" the two blond's heads swiveled back down to the Australian brunette. Suddenly feeling uneasy, they watched in silence as the guy put the duel disk over his wrist and snapped a deck into the slot. "So, are ya ready, Wheeler? I challenge you to a duel for your soul!"
"Uh..."
The next part of the plane was almost entirely empty. There was only two stewardesses yammering away over their coffee, barley giving the two a glance. They had already gotten their glares from Kaiba when they first tried to... talk to him... Deciding that they ought to make sure the pilots were still alive, they left the room, leaving it completely open. Bad stewardesses, huh?
"Kaiba!"
The person in question turned around smoothly on his feet. Hmm... the guy didn't look familiar... of course, Seto Kaiba didn't usually bother talking to mailmen... "What do you want?"
Smiling, Alister put his duel disk over his wrist, wishing that the stupid mailbag wasn't necessary for his other job. "I challenge you to a duel- winner leaves with his soul!"
"Go away, you crackpot."
"I'm not a crackpot, Kaiba- this challenge is for real. And your soul is on the line!"
"Don't you think you're enjoying this too much? The answer's no."
"Not even a short duel?"
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
"You're forcing to do something I really don't want to do..."
"Go away."
"You're in for it now!" It was time to put his knowledge of Valon's 'annoy' methods and mail to good use... Ignoring the inconvenience of the duel disk still on his wrist, Alister ducked his hand into the mailbag and came up with some good, thick mail. "Duel me!" With expert aim, he threw one piece, hitting Kaiba in the forehead.
"Ack! What is with you!"
"Duel me!" Another thrown.
"Would you stop that!"
Smiling to himself, Alister dug through the bag's contents for more mail. This was fun! "Beware the bills!"
"That's it! It's war!" Kaiba ducked the bill hurtling at him, and got behind a seat. With a smooth, graceful swoop, he had his deck in his hand, ready to whale the stranger in the head. Wacko. "Go! Hitotsome Giant!"
Alister ducked- barely- and got behind a plane seat himself. "Electricity Bill!"
"Noooooo! Not that!"
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Are you okay?" Struggling back to consciousness, Rafeal opened his eyes to see someone standing over him. Gee, was this embarrassing.
"Um... yeah, I'm fine... Just... fell asleep, I guess," the blond muttered, trying to get up to his feet; they felt like jello.
"Are you sure you're okay? You looked a little green..."
Rafeal nodded his head- his boss was going to kill him for 'sleeping' on the job, although he wasn't exactly asleep- "Yeah.. I'm fine... Uh- if you'll excuse me.." Feeling utterly foolish, the blond gathered up the equipment, preparing to leave. He'd get to this stall tomorrow. Maybe.
"Yer turn, Aussie," Wheeler muttered, trying to find a more comfortable position. This was getting a bit ridiculous! He just knew that whomever had thought airplane seats up had taken dueling in accountant, and had apparently tried to stop the passengers from dueling...
Valon was just as uncomfortably pinned to his seat like Wheeler was squished between the two chairs. They weren't using any holograms, thank goodness, or else this would be even more uncomfortable... Hmm... maybe this wasn't such a good idea... "Al' right then... Take this! I'll play Metal Ar- what in bloody blazin' #!"
"What kind of magic card is that?" Wheeler asked, blinking in surprise. He had figured that Pegasus would at least keep card names G-rated... but no! That drunken idiot. His question was answered as something hit him from behind, making his vision go all wobbly. "Wha- wha was that..?" he got out, before delusion got the better of him and he muttered, "One mo'e minute, mama..."
Yugi glanced down at the heavy yellow paper that had gotten his friend in the back of his head. It looked familiar... it had writing... a stamp... and- and- whatwasitagain- and a return address..? "Hey, Joey- you just got hit in the head by a National Geographic Magazine Envelope!" Yugi cried out, pointing down at the National Geographic insignia. "See! It still has the magazine in it!"
"Wonduhful, Yug... Who threw it?" Awake now, and angry, Joey yanked his duel disk off his wrist and twisted towards the front of the plane again. "All right, who threw that! C'mon! Just try it again, you mangy- HOLY !"
"Joey! You're not supposed to curse on the show- what the #!"
Blinking in surprise- who knew the runt had it in him- Valon hid as more and more National Geographic Magazine envelopes and bills came hurtling at them- and the other passengers, for that matter- from the cut off room in the front of the plane. He had only seen one person with mail get on the plane... and that had been Alister... But why was he flinging the stuff around..?
His deck had run out of cards long before the mailman had of letters, bills, or even magazines, and so the war now had pieces of mail flinging back and forth between the two of them. Dodging behind the seat as a practically nasty looking magazine hurtled its way toward him, Kaiba moved out towards the aisle a bit to get a piece of badly aimed mail. Stretching his hand out to what seemed like an unadvisable distance when under fire, Kaiba vowed then and there to never get into another fight with a mailman again They. Were. Vicious.
Wincing as his hand was hit, Kaiba withdrew with mail in hand. This guy had good aim with mail... Duel cards were generally Seto's style, but practice with heavier objects couldn't hurt. He threw the mail... and cursed as it curved its way through the air to the room beyond. Cross winds- he hated them.
"You did a good job, Kaiba," Alister called out, feeling a little unhappy. The mail supply was starting to thin out... He smile come back, though, as his hand brushed against the secret weapon of all mail people around... "But now you must face... THE JUNK MAIL!"
"ACK! NOT THAT!"
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Feeling immensely bored- there was nobody around to torture. Even Rafeal wasn't back yet...- Dartz flipped through the channels of his spell until he found a rather... interesting picture. Valon was dodging bits of small, rectangular objects that were attacking a room full of various people. He was being followed by both First Most Wanted Soul and Second Most Wanted Soul in the entire world, and had yet to turn around and challenge them to a duel. What was wrong with that boy..?
The employee winced his way through to a room off the screen, only to be hurtled back by a very harsh tirade of objects. He crashed into the Pharaoh and the runt's friend, landing- dazed- on top of them.
Soon after that, the Third Most Wanted Soul crashed through, nearly tripping over the pile. In hot pursuit behind him came Alister, dressed in his mailman uniform, winging rectangular object after object, nailing Third Most Wanted Soul every time. He, however, did trip over the pile. Two ladies behind them- both dressed in a similar uniform- were shouting various things after the whole group. They were clearly enraged... and it looked like the fun was just about over...
With a sigh, Dartz let the screen go blank, and he fell heavily into his chair. Those fools. When they got back, they'll be working their butts off for this... humiliation. Flinging rectangular objects after one's opponent was no proper way to get a soul. For one, you had to get them in the head, repeatedly.
His thoughts were interrupted as the door opened, admitting a very tired looking Rafeal. "Sir... the mail came..." He placed the bits of rectangular papers in front of his boss and turned to leave when Dartz got an idea...
It had certainly seemed like fun to Alister... Hmm... "Oh, Rafeal!"
WHACK!
In case if you didn't understand the Most Wanted Soul Thang, a 'rundown':
First Most Wanted Soul Yugi/ Yami technically the Pharaoh, but since they share the same body
Second Most Wanted Soul Joey
Third Most Wanted Soul Seto
Thanks and please review! suggestions are always welcome, but once again: I might not use them, so don't be cross. But I'd love to get some ideas. hint, hint
