CANNOT BE SEEN

XxX

Chapter 12

"In this great future you can't forget your past." Bob Marley

XxX

The day had given way to evening as the sun melted slowly from the sky. It slipped down behind the horizon and disappeared behind the line of forest trees. The stars and the moon were visible only in the top half of the darkened sky while the bottom half was sullied by the diffusing light of the hidden sun. The whisper of the wind blew through the village and murmured its secrets into the ears of the trees and the open windows of the homes. It was a beautiful night, a night of still silence, broken only by the hammering and shouts of the men at work on the new house. They were trying to get all they could done before the light completely diminished. The wedding was looming closer with every day and the workers were put on a short time line, they had started late because of what had happened to Lucius and the funeral and finally the rain. But now they were well under way. The crickets had just started to accompany the other sounds of the night and they could be heard distinctly from the front room of the Walkers' house where Mrs. And Mr. Walker now sat.

There was a comfortable silence that hung in the air until it was broken by the hesitant voice of Mrs. Walker.

"Edward, I talked to Ivy today."

Edward Walker looked at his wife, not sure what to say to that for he was certain it must have ended in a fight. So, "Is that so?" was all that he said.

"Yes, I think that it went well." she answered with a dull happiness in her voice.

"Well, that is good. What did you speak of?"

"Her marriage. Lucius is a nice boy is he not?" She asked, a sly prompt hidden beneath her tone.

Edward blinked and turned to look at her, wondering what she was up to for it was certainly an odd comment for her to make. "He is."

"You do think so don't you? And his mother. You think she is nice too?" The manner in which she spoke brought question to Edward's mind, wondering what it was that his wife was up to...for it was surely something. His mind stopped briefly on the thought that she had found out about his slight...feelings for Alice, but he did not want to believe that for a moment.

"Uh, yes, yes, Alice is nice." He said after clearing his throat gently.

"I thought you might think so." She went on, her voice becoming all the more ominous.

Mr. Walker did not speak for a moment, and then he took a breath and said firmly, "What are you saying, Tabitha?"

She turned to him sharply, looking at him incredulously. "I am telling you that I have seen the way you look at Alice, Edward. I have seen the way she looks at you. And I do not like it at all."

Edward just sat there, staring at his wife. She knew. For some reason that fact scared him. Fear held his heart in its grip and stopped his breath from leaving his chest. He did not know what to say so silence prevailed.

"What do you-?" Edward started finally but was quickly interrupted by his wife.

"You know what I mean, Edward!" Her voice rose. She did not want to get angry at him-well, she already was angry-she didn't want to show outward signs of anger, but it was consuming her, getting the best of her, and slowly she was starting to care less about the promise she made to herself. "I see the way she looks at you..."

Edward leaned forward, setting his elbows on his knees and dropped his face into his hands. He felt like his whole world was slowly collapsing around him and he was powerless to stop it. He took a moment to gather his thoughts and then he sat back up and looked straight into his wife's eyes.

"Tabitha, I love you. And I want no one to come between the promise I made to you. The promise we made to each other. You have no reason to believe any differently." With that he took her hand in his.

Tabitha Walker stared at her husband, trying to gauge his honesty. The very thought made her breath catch, she had never doubted him before. He had always been perfectly honest with her. Always. Why should now be any different?

"Edward, I want you to talk to her. I want you to tell her that you are married. That she needs to stop...her affection. That it will never amount to anything."

He sighed and looked to the floor for a second before looking back up and nodding slowly. "Okay."

XxX

Alice Hunt paced back and forth in the front room of her house. In her hand she fiddled restlessly with a metal key and her eyes were trained on a locked black box that sat on the table she walked in front of.

That box had haunted her thoughts all day. She could not seem to get past it. Every time she tried to get her mind off of it, it would come back to overwhelm her thoughts again.

Thinking about the future consequently had her thinking about the past. About her husband. About the life they had left behind. And when she thought about her past, the box loomed before her. The box held her past captive. Close, but not forgotten. The secrets of everyone's pasts lie in their black boxes. And Alice had been battling about whether or not to open hers.

She really didn't like opening it. It seemed that when she did, the flood of emotions of her past would overtake her and afterwards she would tell herself she would never open it again and would instead live in the present and refuse to dwell on the past. But now...she thought maybe it was best if she looked through it and then put it behind her again for a time, instead of letting the thoughts she was having now seep into her mind. Yes...She would just open it...deal with her lingering thoughts and feelings now and then lock it back up again.

Alice stopped in her tracks and then took a deep breath before stepping slowly up to the wooden table she had set the box on. Without hesitating, she placed the key into the lock, turned it until it clicked, and then pulled it out again. She set t he key on the table blindly as she slowly started to pull the top open. Just as she had gotten it an inch open with her slow movements, there was a sharp rap on the door.

It startled Alice so that she jumped where she stood. After a moment, when her heart settled back into a natural rhythm and she laughed at herself for being so jittery, she went to answer the door. To her immense surprise it was Edward Walker.

"Edward," She greeted him with a smile. He smiled back though it seemed strained and even melancholy.

"Is...something the matter?" She asked with concern. His tight smile didn't waver as he ignored her question.

"May I come in?"

Alice nodded and stood back to let him in and then shut the door behind him. "Is something wrong?" She asked again as she stood uncomfortably by the door.

"I would say so. Yes." He answered, his back to her.

Alice regarded him carefully. "All right...What is it?" He didn't answer, just stood, turned away from her and she brought her hands together as she wrung them with nervousness.

"Tabitha talked with me this evening...she-uh...she thinks that you have...feelings for me." He could barely push the incriminating words past his lips, his speech stilted.

Alice stopped moving, stopped breathing, wondering if she had heard correctly. It had been Lucius who had noticed first that Edward had had feelings for her in the first place. And now he stood accusing her of...having feelings for him. And not even admitting that he had started it.

Edward turned finally to look at Alice, but his eyes did not meet hers. In fact, he did not even look at her, he held his gaze to the floor.

Before Alice could stop herself she had blurted out, "Lucius told me that he was aware of your feelings for me. He told me so before he and Ivy had decided to marry...before everything...was he mistaken?"

Mr. Walker, surprised by her words, pulled his eyes up to meet hers and simply stared.

"I am sorry, Edward. Forget I asked." Alice broke the gaze and looked away, ashamed of asking what he could never admit to.

"No, Alice."

It was then that Alice noticed their close proximity. Before she could speak again, he went on, "I won't forget it, Alice. You speak what you feel. I understand your anger...do you think that I led you on?"

Alice turned so that she faced Edward, and uncomfortable with how close he stood, she took a half step back. "This isn't your fault," was all she could think to say.

Looking back to him, the need to explain overwhelmed her. "Lucius just said...and I just got carried away. I never thought...I just...I am sorry." She shook her head and closed her eyes in frustration at her inability to form her thoughts into complete sentences.

Edward unthinkingly put his hand on her arm but she stepped back desperately as if his touch had hurt her. And, oh, it hurt so much.

The tension in the room was palpable. The two wanted nothing but to escape or to stay right there forever. The last was unthinkable...so escaping was what they both prayed silently to do, yet neither moved even an inch.

"Forgive me." He whispered into the thick silence. Alice said nothing in response. Mr. Walker sighed. "Lucius said that I had feelings for you?"

She nodded. "He said he thought so because you...never touched me...and something about how we never do that things we want to...because we do not want others to know we want to do them..."

Edward smiled a little at the boy's observation, but the smile was sad with the weight of all that was happening. "...maybe he was right." He whispered so softly that Alice had to strain to hear it.

Her body immediately stiffened, as she knew that was the closest admission to his feelings that he would willingly provide to her. 'Maybe he was right.'

Still, Alice could not help the feeling of anger that she couldn't explain...and the overwhelming despairing sorrow. Her eyes welled up with tears, but she held them at bay. "And...maybe Tabitha was right."

Edward looked at her with a flash of something like pity on his face...and it brought a flare of anger to Alice. A tear rolled down her cheek and she made no move to wipe it away as she looked at Edward firmly in the eyes. "Do not look at me like that, Edward." She choked out...suddenly feeling that she did not know the man that stood before her.

"Like what?" He asked softly, his heart breaking at the pain this was causing Alice.

"Like you feel sorry for me." She whispered.

"I never wanted any of this to happen." He went whispered back, as if it would make the words sting any less than if he had said them shouting.

Alice closed her eyes tightly and turned her back, more tears slid down her cheeks and she didn't want him to see. First he admitted to having feelings for her and then he said he didn't want this to happen...he didn't want to have feelings for her. That he was sorry he ever had them. She never expected him to say anything about his feelings for her...but she never expected he would say he wished he didn't have them. It made her feel even more alone and she tried desperately to compose herself.

"Edward, go back to your wife...there is nothing between us."

He took a step closer, standing right behind her. "Do not be angry at me Alice, please." He pleaded.

She, against her better judgment, turned back around to face him as she wiped her damp face. "Edward. I never thought that you would ever act on your feelings...not ever. I never wanted you to...leave your wife, or anything of the sort. When you sent Ivy to the...towns...you said that it was all you could give me. And it saved my son. You did. And I could not ask for anything more. I never thanked you, Edward." This time when she looked at him, there was no anger evident in her eyes.

Mr. Walker shook his head and held up his hands. "I did nothing. The doctor saved Lucius...Ivy saved Lucius. I did not."

Alice sighed and looked out the window, transfixed by the swaying, now lit, lanterns. "Ivy would never have gone without your permission. It was hard letting her go. You stood up against all of the elders...all to save Lucius. And I appreciate it, and it is more than I could have asked of you. When you said it was all you could give me...I believed you. I knew it was all you could give me, and I know it now. I want nothing more of you, Edward. You need to go back to your wife...you need to tell her there is nothing between us...because there is nothing. I know you made a commitment to Tabitha and you love her. You need not to feel, in any fashion, any sort of...obligation to me. Just go to your wife...and forget this ever happened. I want us to be friends, Edward. Like we used to be. When we were comfortable around each other. Can we not have that again?" With those last words, Alice turned to Edward and looked at him with an unreadable expression. They stood mere inches apart and she could see in detail the different emotions flickering over his face.

Edward nodded after a short pause. "Of course we can, Alice. I want that to. I want us to be friends."

How ironic it was then, that in the split second after agreeing that both wanted only to be friends that their faces moved closer to each other's until they could both feel each other's breath on their faces.

Emotions welled up, flooding through both of them and shutting off their thoughts. Before either could think, speak, or even breathe, their lips met.

It was a passionate kiss of long suppressed emotion and it was completely uncertain as to who had initiated it. Perhaps it was neither...and it just happened. Like it was something that had to happen for the world to keep spinning. Alice moved her hands to Edward's chest and his hands moved to hold her waist. The fire consumed them both in a burst of heat.

It wasn't long though until Alice's brain started to work again. And when it did, an alarm blared through her whole body. She pulled away from Edward and stumbled slowly backwards, pressing her hand to her burning lips.

"I am so sorry." She whispered, staring at him. "I am so sorry. What have I done?" She shook her head, thinking of the married man she had been kissing and before he could respond she was drowned by the need to get out and she turned and fled, running down her steps and away from her house.

Edward just stood in the middle of the front room, not moving. He couldn't believe that they had...kissed. Everything was happening so, so quickly. He was married. It was not Alice's fault, he knew, he had wanted it too. But he had never thought it would happen. He smiled slightly beside himself for it had felt good. The spark that passed through them. But he could not feel the comfortable love in it that he felt when he kissed his wife. He nodded slowly to himself, realizing that he was going to be with his wife and that he and Alice were going to be good friends. Just like they used to be. The kiss they had just shared had killed all the tension between them, he could feel it even now. And he knew that they were going to be friends, just like she wanted. And he was going to go home to his wife now.

Edward Walker turned and walked out the open door, shutting it behind him, and he jogged down the steps, walking back to his house in the dark, knowing that Alice would want to be alone, and there was nothing he could do to make her feel better now.

XxX

Lucius knocked on the door of Mr. Nicholson's house with one hand as he balanced the pile of wood on one arm.

It opened soon after and Mr. Nicholson smiled at Lucius, letting him into the warm house.

As Lucius stacked the wood he had chopped next to the fireplace, August Nicholson came and sat down in his chair by the fire. "Thank you, Lucius. I have not been feeling well these last couple of days." He admitted.

Lucius nodded. "You are welcome."

August smiled at the words, not used to Lucius speaking to him. It reminded him painfully of his son, but he kept the smile on his face despite the sorrow that coursed through him, as it did the last few days.

"I was so pleased to hear of your engagement to Ivy. The wedding is soon, is it not?"

Lucius did not smile so to speak, but his eyes lit up and they shone in the firelight. "Yes. It is."

August nodded, his smile crinkling the skin around his eyes. "That is wonderful." He watched as Lucius went on stacking the wood. "And how is your mother?"

Lucius stared into the fire, remembering what he and his mother had talked about this morning. "She is well, sir." Lucius answered quietly.

"That is good." August nodded, his gaze stayed on Lucius. "I would wager that she is very excited about the wedding."

Lucius looked at Mr. Nicholson, thinking of how his mother would tell him so everyday; how she went by the house they were building several times a day to see how it was progressing, the way she helped to organize the plans of the wedding day. August chuckled at the expression on Lucius's face and nodded. "Mothers will be like that," he said knowingly.

Lucius turned to continue stacking but August stopped him. "That is enough, Lucius. Why do you not take the rest home for your mother to use?"

Lucius simply nodded in agreement and stood to leave.

XxX

As Lucius walked slowly to his home, he hoped his mother wasn't worrying about him, he wasn't quite certain if he had told her he was going to be out this late. But he was with Ivy and he sort of lost track of time, and then he realized he needed to bring Mr. Nicholson firewood like he had told his mother he would.

He was walking by one of the sheds when he saw the silhouette of a person leaning back against one of the sides, their head bent. Lucius stopped and stood looking at the black shape, wondering if he should go up to them. He decided to and, with his arms still full of wood, he walked slowly up to the figure.

It wasn't until he was a couple feet away when he realized that the shadowed figure was his own mother. He stood still, waiting for her to notice him standing before her. She didn't, it seemed. "Mother?" He asked quietly.

She finally looked up at him and the small pool of light cast from a nearby lantern highlighted the tears on her cheeks. "Hello, Lucius." She smiled through her tears.

He dropped the logs at his feet and took a step closer, not breaking eye contact. "Mother...what is wrong?" He asked gently.

Her smile widened at his kindness and she leaned away from the side of the building. "I am fine, Dear," Alice whispered as she wiped the tears from her face.

Lucius shook his head. "Why are you crying?"

She laughed quietly, though it threatened to turn into sobs. "Remember what we were talking about this morning?" She asked.

Lucius nodded.

"Well, Edward came over this evening to discuss the same thing."

He said nothing as he waited for her to speak in more detail.

"We just...talked. We are still good friends, and that is it." Alice was not going to tell her son about the kiss her and Mr. Walker had shared. Oh, no. She wasn't going to tell anyone. Ever.

"I am sorry." Lucius offered, feeling deep sadness for his mother. He knew she was lonely and he wanted her to feel better.

"I am fine, Lucius." She insisted, trying to convince herself as much as him. "It was stupid of me to have feelings for him. He is married."

Lucius did not say anything for a few moments as his mother stared off into the dark outline of the woods. "I want you to be happy." He said, his tone hushed.

She smiled again, turned to look at her only son. "I really am fine, Lucius. You make me happy." She took his face in her hands and kissed his forehead. "Do not worry over me any longer." He nodded only to appease her.

"So how is your future bride?" She asked, changing the subject before Lucius could say something more.

Alice had taken to calling Ivy that sometimes and Lucius blushed slightly at his mother's fussing. "She is well."

"That is good." Alice smiled genuinely with a tilt of her head.

"Are you going to Mr. Nicholson's with this?" She then asked, gesturing to the pile of wood at their feet.

"I already brought him his wood. I was bringing this home."

"Good. Why do you not go home and start a fire? I will be home soon. I need to go for a walk to clear my mind." Alice brought her hand to the side of her head slowly, as if there was a pressure building by her temples.

"All right." Lucius agreed, fighting the temptation to ask if she was all right again. "Be careful." He said after a moment, making Alice smile as she thought about how she would say that to Lucius before he left the house almost everyday when he was young...even thought he was most likely the most careful boy his age.

"I will." She promised as she turned and walked away.

Lucius watched her for a moment before, with a slightly heavy heart, gathering the pile of wood into his arms again and making his way to his home.

He had to push the door open with his foot and maneuver into the house, but when he got inside he easily stacked the logs neatly and then lit a perfect warm fire and sat, warming his hands that were numbed slightly from the cold outside. He couldn't get his mind off of his mother. She had seemed so sad to him. So lonely. And he couldn't blame her. He felt lonely now even though he knew Ivy was only a couple houses away from him. He hated to think of how his mother felt when she had loved this man who she shouldn't have. But, you can't help who you love, can you?

Lucius sighed as he sat back on his heels, his mind moving, as it always did, to the thought of the secret of the village. Whenever he had a moment alone he would brainstorm unconsciously about how they were to get more evidence. He was curious by nature, but the real reason it struck him so much, he thought, was how involved Ivy was in finding answers. She got so frustrated that her father held these secrets that he hid from her. He was fueled by that as well as his own inquisitiveness.

He could not help thinking that those books had been the perfect evidence and they would never get anything as good as what had burned in the fire.

It was just as he was thinking this that he turned to look out the window. Instead, his eye caught the sight before him. On the table sat the black box that usually stayed in the corner of the room. Not only that...but the top was propped open slightly. Lucius's heart had stopped beating and his breath had caught in his throat. He dared not even think as he stood up slowly and went to stand in front of the box. He saw the key lying on the table beside it and he abandoned the nagging feeling that what he was doing was invading his mother's privacy as he gently lifted the lid and pushed it up so that the contents of the box were revealed. He shook his head slowly as he just stared at what he had uncovered.

The boxes that the elders all had in their homes. Hiding their secrets. And here was Lucius's mother's box. Holding all of the secrets of her past. He couldn't believe he hadn't thought of the boxes before. Whatever was in them...was the secrets of the elders. It wasn't evidence of their secrets...it was their secrets. An extreme feeling of anxious excitement took over Lucius as he, with slightly shaking hands, touched a corner of a turned-over picture. This was what he and Ivy had been looking for. This is what they needed. Three little words rolled over and over in Lucius's head as he took a deep breath with tightly closed eyes: This is it.

XxX

TBC

Until next time...