Secretly Yearns For Heaven
Somehow in his suffering, as an instinct I imagined, he managed to raise his hand to cover his face. I gasped in awe at his endurance. Christophe was attempting to hit him, but I clung onto his arm and would not let go. After much of a struggle, he shook me off and I fell to the floor next to Erik. Christophe stepped back and grabbed his pistol as I turned towards my love. Our faces were inches apart, and his deformity was indeed horrendous, but I could tell that he was close to death and nothing would cause me to recoil from his love now, after all he had done for me.
"My love, I am sorry…I tried so hard to free you…" he rasped out. It was so difficult for him to speak because of his labored breathing. I raised a shaking finger to his lips. Once I silenced him, I could not help but run my hand along the distorted half of his face. He closed his eyes as I felt the parchment like skin that covered bone. His body jolted again and I could sense the warmth of his flesh beginning to diminish slowly. "Perhaps…it is……best…that it will end…this way…I know you could…never…love me…now that you have…metthe monster that is truly me…" Christophe was aiming the gun at me, but he was far too interested in our exchange to kill me yet. I still had time to tell Erik what had been in my mind since the day I awoke to him above me.
"Erik…my love…Make no mistake, for you were never the monster in my life…I have always known and loved the man. I never knew a monster. No, perhaps that is a lie…" I kissed his misshapen cheek, then got to my feet and walked up to Christophe who was showing a sense of disbelief at my sudden boldness. I was directly in his face and his gun was now jabbing into my stomach. I spoke with venom in every word.
"You broke my soul twice, but never again! I don't care ANYMORE! Erik is my true love, and I now know you never were, nor could you have ever been. If you kill me now…FINE…I will be one with him in heaven…angel beside angel. But it should terrify you, for God will heed the warning of two angels…and believe me when I say, your eternity will be consumed by flames in hell!"
"He could never be accepted to heaven…even now he begins his journey to hell…a demon in heaven? A repulsive creature such as him…being accepted by God? Oh no, I think not! He is grotesque!"
"No Christophe…you lie…he is pure in heart. That is much more than can be said about you! You are the GROTESQUE MONSTER!" I tackled him to the ground and smashed my fist hard into his nose. His nose audibly snapped and he shrieked out. Before we could end our scrabble, he was held but a pair of arms as was I. I looked around to find that my family's tomb was filled with over ten policemen. I let all tenseness leave me and they let their hold on me diminish. Quickly I arranged Erik's cloak on my body so it served as more of a robe and then ran to his side. A few of the officers were speaking around him. Erik was still conscious and alive as he stared into my eyes.
"I had … to inform… them…by letter…they…come…here…save…you…live…love…MY angel…MY love!" The thoughts he wished so badly to share with me were reduced to fragments of sentences…words…that to others meant nothing, but to me, they meant the world. I gave him as loving a smile as I possibly could which seemed to content him and he closed his eyes. His breathing became more forced and he closed his eyes tightly. I could only relate all to well at what this intensive kind of pain felt like to him. I owed him my life, and both he and I knew that, but yet, I knew he would never hold that against me. I loved him all the more for that.
The police were softly discussing what was to be Erik's fate. They knew that he was a wanted man and destined for the gallows, but they were also aware of his heroic acts towards me. It seemed that they were unsure as to whether they should send for medical assistance. I approached the men and made my plea.
"Monsieurs, PLEASE, I beg you…call a doctor! This man may have once been...misguided in life, but please…I owe him my life and SO much more. I…I love him dearly! He deserves to live. Believe me when I say that if he dies, everything inside of me will die with him…Please, what is your decision?"
The men looked at each other and when their eyes met I knew that I had won. The man who must have been in charge told the other to go get a doctor. He left quickly and I sat down beside Erik. Erik's eyes opened slightly and I held his hand gently. The police chief came and sat next to me on the ground. His eyes rested on Erik's. They showed no anger or hate towards each other, merely a mutual understanding. Erik spoke very softly, his eyes residing on the officer's.
"Take care of her…NEVER let that demon touch her!"
The officer merely smiled and replied, "Do not fear…rest easy…she will be well taken care of."
Erik was very pleased at his response and his eyelids trembled shut. I was petrified that he would die if he did not remain awake. I could not help but be selfish. I didn't care how much pain he was in and how much he needed to rest, all I wanted was him to remain awake, so I was sure he was living still.
"Erik…they are getting a doctor…it will be alright! The doctor will come shortly. He will patch you up in no time and then nothing will stop us from being together. We can start our lives together….we…," but the look he gave me devastated me to silence. His eyes were no longer the green and gold, but a hazy amber and gray mixture.
"My angel…stop this…you…are…and…need…to remain…so strong! Go, love…find another…love him…have his…children…name one…after me…and I…will be contented…"
I starred at him and shook my head, sobs clogging my throat. "I could never…I love you! You alone can make my life worth living. I love you! You and only YOU!" He was pushing me away once again. I felt some of the emotions from the night I first left him return and they now mixed with the fear of his possible death. "Oh, Erik!" I collapsed next to him on the floor and snuggled up against him, all the while being careful not to make his pain more intense.
I saw the doctor and his policeman escort approaching though my veil of tears. The doctor kneeled beside us both and started to unlatch his medical bag. He had many bottles of various colored medications that he started aligning on the stone floor. I watched until the head of the police came and attempted to take me away from Erik. I clawed at him, my sobs growing more violent, in an attempt to stay at Erik's side. Erik raised his hand in the air which was obviously a major exertion for him. I froze and waited. His voice was soft and barely audible. He first spoke to the officer.
"Take…her……she…needs…care…take…her…" I shook my head at the officer and refused to move. My love then spoke to me. "I…love…you…we…will…never…ever……part…go…they…will…
care and….protect…you…It's …what…I…want…for……my angel…!" I couldn't deny that I loved him and wanted to please him. I sobbed and left with the officer, still somewhat reluctantly. The sound of my feet on the floor was alien to me. My toe hit something solid and I looked down. There on the floor lied the white porcelain mask. I picked it up and held it to my chest, adoring the memories it held, but despising the ghastly appearance of it when it was isolated.
