A/N- Nothing to say right now, except yes, I'm working on an alt. chappie,
and yes, I'm updating as fast as I can. This is so much fun. Unfortunately
I have (late I know) midterms coming up. So I have to deal with those and
it may take me until a week or two to update. I'm sorry about it, but
there's not too much I can do unless I want to fail. Keep reading, R/R!
"There is no such thing as a subtle hint when it comes to Ron," Ginny pointed out to Harry when he suggested that they just subtly hint to Ron that he and Hermione would made a good couple, "I've been trying to subtly hint it to him for ages. He doesn't get it."
Harry had to admit that she had a point. When it came to Hermione, Ron was completely clueless. And in general, he didn't often pick up on things unless someone almost spelled them out for him.
"Okay, then why don't we just come out and say it. We could just tell him that we think Hermione likes him and that he should ask her out," Harry tried again. Ginny shook her head. "We can't just tell him! He might get mad at us for meddling in his nonexistent love life!" she said. It almost sounded like she was directly quoting her brother.
Harry threw up his hands in exasperation. "Well then what do we do? We can't hint, and we can't come right out and say it! What other option is there?" he asked, losing his patience. He would much rather have been dancing with Ginny right now than arguing with her over how they were supposed to help Ron and Hermione hook up. However, he was too good a best friend to Ron to do that.
Ginny had to think before answering. She had never thought getting Ron and Hermione together would be so hard. They were the most obvious couple ever; it shouldn't have been this much work. Suddenly, her eyes got a glint in them. "What? What is it?" Harry asked, seeing the look.
"We can't hint. And we can't come right out and say it," Ginny repeated, "But we could get someone else to do it for us. And we could get someone who wouldn't do either of those things. Think about it. Who is the one person Ron is most likely to do exactly the opposite of what they say? Who could use indirect logic to get him to do it?"
Harry looked at her, a little confused. She clearly had a good idea, but he didn't quite get the wording. "You lost me there, Ginny," he said, "Just tell me the plan." Ginny grinned, enjoying her new role as the brains of the operation. "No problem," she said, "All we have to do is talk to one person Ron Weasley can't stand. It's time to pay a visit to Draco Malfoy."
"Woohoo," Harry commented, thinking of how much he was going to hate being in Draco's debt, "This is going to be a fun conversation." Ignoring Harry's lack of enthusiasm, Ginny grabbed his hand and they started walking over to where Draco was happily dancing with Pansy, who hanging all over him.
Meanwhile, Fred and George were plotting as they were dancing. "There has to be some crazy thing we can do to be remembered at this dance," George said, deep in thought. But it was harder than he thought it would be to think of an idea. "Fred, have you got anything?" he asked after a few minutes had gone by and he hadn't had any success.
Fred shook his head, looking a little dazed. "Are you wearing perfume?" he asked, inhaling Angelina's hair. She laughed, and shook her head. "It's probably my piña colada shampoo," she realized, brushing her hair out of her eyes. Fred didn't respond for a minute.
"Piña colada," he said dazedly. It should have been a question, but it was more of a statement. "Fred Weasley, what are you thinking?" Angelina asked, staring into his eyes trying to figure him out.
"Piña colada," he repeated, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Angelina and Alicia looked at him in confusion, but George suddenly looked like he understood. "Brilliant!" he said, clapping Fred on the shoulder, "Bloody brilliant!"
"Oh, just tell us what you're on about!" Alicia exclaimed, sick of not understanding what the twins were talking about. Fred grinned the same grin he always got right before he played a great prank. It was also the same grin that came before he got a week's worth of detention from McGonagall for 'unseemly disruptions' in Transfiguration.
"Do any of you remember the party we had at my house over the summer? The one where we turned the backyard into a beach and served piña coladas?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. The two girls nodded, not really seeing where he was going. "Well, do you remember Bill and the piña coladas?" he continued impishly.
It took a minute, but it eventually dawned on them what Fred was talking about. "You mean when Bill was trying to spike Percy's piña colada and he accidentally spiked his own and got totally sloshed and made a complete fool of himself and Fleur wouldn't speak to him for the rest of the evening?" Angelina asked, summarizing the story.
Fred and George nodded together. "Well, what do you say we add a little spice to this shindig?" Fred asked, sounding completely ridiculous. "As stupid as you sound, and your idea is, I'm in if everyone else is," Alicia was the first to agree. Angelina and George, after thinking about it for a second, agreed as well.
"Can I ask who we're targeting?" George asked, taking in all the people in the Great Hall and realizing that it would be better to tackle one or two than the whole crowd. Fred had to think about that. His one weakness in pranking was sometimes not thinking his ideas fully through before announcing them.
"Well, I don't think it would be a good idea to go after Snape after what he went through already. He might rather kill us than give us detention as punishment. But it would be way more fun to go after an adult than a kid," Fred pointed out. He was right, though. Seeing someone like McGonagall drunk would be so much funnier than seeing someone like Harry drunk. It would be more unexpected.
"A professor or a guest?" Alicia asked, getting into the fun. It was a good question. Although both Fred and George would have loved to get Lucius Malfoy back for all the times he'd insulted their father, they knew that that was not a smart move. "I think a professor would be funny," chipped in Angelina, "Not McGonagall, though, because she'd give us detention for ages. I'd rather not get more than a week."
Suddenly, the perfect answer dawned on them. It would be unexpected and funny, but they would probably get a less serious punishment. "Professor Lupin," Fred said naughtily. The other three nodded. "Perfect," they agreed, "Should be interesting."
The soon-to-be prank target and his crazy best friend were over at the punch bowl while all this was going on. "What are *you* doing here?" Lucius asked disdainfully, taking a sip of champagne. Sirius was reluctant to make a comeback now that he was actually over here. He was full of talk, but he'd rather spice up the dance while retaining all his limbs.
"I'm *here* to get some *champagne*," he said coolly. Lucius looked at Cissa, and they both laughed. "Lupin, you're actually planning on letting Black drink champagne? Is that really in your best judgment after what happened during I Never?" Cissa asked, looking at Sirius with contempt.
Sirius made a face. He had never liked Cissa. She had always been such a snob, and marrying Lucius had only intensified it. "What exactly happened during I Never?" Lucius asked, curious about any embarrassing information on Sirius. Cissa grinned. "Sirius had a few too many shots and got so drunk Lupin had to piggyback him down the hall," she said, sniggering as she remembered it.
Sirius burst out laughing. "Aw Remmie, I forgot about getting a piggyback," he said, "Don't worry, I won't get so drunk you'll have to piggyback me this time." Remmie eyed him warningly. "You won't get drunk at all," he said, picking up a bottle of champagne and pouring some into a glass, "I'm trusting you, Sirius. I know you can handle one glass."
Lucius and Cissa exchanged glances. They had had enough experience to know that trusting Sirius was never a smart idea. "Well, if you're planning on hanging around the punch bowl, then we're certainly not. We'll be talking to Snape. If you do anything embarrassing that would make great blackmail, come on over. If not, do us a favor and don't bother us," Lucius said, flipping his hair as he took Cissa's arm and they walked off.
"Remmie, aren't you going to have any champagne?" Sirius asked, noting that he hadn't poured himself any. Lupin shook his head, and Sirius rolled his eyes. "Oh come on Remmie, don't be a party pooper," he said, making Lupin feel as if he was having déjà vu, "Just have one glass. You know you can handle one glass!"
Sighing, Remmie decided there was no use arguing with him. One glass of champagne couldn't hurt anyone. Besides, it wasn't like having a glass of champagne himself would influence how trashed Sirius got.
In a secluded corner of the Great Hall, Snape and Ally were standing trying to remain inconspicuous. Neither of them had their wands on them, so they couldn't summon any clothes. And it would be far too embarrassing to ask anyone else to do it for them. That meant Ally was stuck in the slip to her dress, and all Sevvie had to wear was his makeshift sheet-toga. Without it, he would certainly be in trouble.
"Sevvie, Ally, how have you been?" Lucius asked as he and Cissa breezed over to them. Ally smiled briefly at Cissa, but Sevvie glared at Lucius almost as evilly as he often looked at certain Gryffindors. "What?" Lucius asked resentfully, taking another sip of champagne and giving Sevvie what he intended to be a winning half-smile.
Of course, Sevvie being Sevvie, it had no effect on him. "What?" he spat in shock, "You think you can just summon your boxers right off me in front of almost the entire school, forcing me to wear a sheet-toga, and then waltz over here and act like everything is okay?"
"They were my boxers in the first place!" Lucius argued, resisting the urge to take them out of his pocket and slap Sevvie across the face with them, just for fun. "What kind of man wears that kind of boxers, anyway?" Snape pointed out, shaking his head.
Lucius gaped at him, insulted as he always was when people said anything bad about his style. It was something he prided himself on almost as much as he did his hair, and he always got very distraught when it was criticized. Cissa had learned this over the years, but Sevvie had either never caught on or decided to ignore it.
"Look, Lucius honey, Sev obviously isn't in the mood to talk," Cissa put in, trying to avoid a huge scene in front of everyone, "Why don't we just go back to your room?" Lucius was all set to agree, but Sevvie shook his head vehemently. "No!" he said nervously, "I mean, no that's not a good idea. I mean, how about Ally and I go back to the room instead."
There was no way Lucius was going to agree to that though, even if it was solely because it was what Sevvie wanted. "No. If we can't go back to the room, then neither can you," he said, sounding very spoiled and immature.
"For Merlin's sake, Lucius, you are impossible," Snape retorted. Lucius mimicked him, making both Cissa and Ally start to laugh. "Are you making fun of me?" he asked indignantly.
The two girls shook their heads. "You know what, let's compromise," Ally suggested tentatively, "Why don't we all go back to your room?" Cissa agreed, and after some persuading, Lucius and Sevvie relented too. They started walking toward the doors, Sevvie blushing and holding his toga tightly around him.
Just as they were about to leave to go down to Snape's dungeon room, however, Professor Dumbledore managed to stroll right in front of them, blocking their exit. "Excuse me," Lucius said coolly, trying (and failing) to brush the Headmaster aside.
"Yes, excuse you," Dumbledore chuckled, not moving in the slightest, "If I might be so bold as to make a request. As you can see, most of the school is now in the Great Hall. I think it would be in everyone's best interest if you would all just stay, mingle, and keep an eye on things. Would you do that?"
Lucius refrained from cursing the Headmaster for ruining his fun (or slapping him across the face with his boxers), but he was certainly thinking about it in his head. "Of course we would," he said, gritting his teeth and smiling so that he wouldn't lose his reputation as a respectable school governor. Of course, the Too Sexy boxers couldn't have helped him much, but he didn't want any further damage done.
"Excellent!" Dumbledore said, clapping his hands, "I appreciate your cooperation. Thank you." Snape managed a small smile. "Not at all," he said, turning on his heel and walking back towards his corner with Ally, Cissa, and Lucius following behind.
"There is no such thing as a subtle hint when it comes to Ron," Ginny pointed out to Harry when he suggested that they just subtly hint to Ron that he and Hermione would made a good couple, "I've been trying to subtly hint it to him for ages. He doesn't get it."
Harry had to admit that she had a point. When it came to Hermione, Ron was completely clueless. And in general, he didn't often pick up on things unless someone almost spelled them out for him.
"Okay, then why don't we just come out and say it. We could just tell him that we think Hermione likes him and that he should ask her out," Harry tried again. Ginny shook her head. "We can't just tell him! He might get mad at us for meddling in his nonexistent love life!" she said. It almost sounded like she was directly quoting her brother.
Harry threw up his hands in exasperation. "Well then what do we do? We can't hint, and we can't come right out and say it! What other option is there?" he asked, losing his patience. He would much rather have been dancing with Ginny right now than arguing with her over how they were supposed to help Ron and Hermione hook up. However, he was too good a best friend to Ron to do that.
Ginny had to think before answering. She had never thought getting Ron and Hermione together would be so hard. They were the most obvious couple ever; it shouldn't have been this much work. Suddenly, her eyes got a glint in them. "What? What is it?" Harry asked, seeing the look.
"We can't hint. And we can't come right out and say it," Ginny repeated, "But we could get someone else to do it for us. And we could get someone who wouldn't do either of those things. Think about it. Who is the one person Ron is most likely to do exactly the opposite of what they say? Who could use indirect logic to get him to do it?"
Harry looked at her, a little confused. She clearly had a good idea, but he didn't quite get the wording. "You lost me there, Ginny," he said, "Just tell me the plan." Ginny grinned, enjoying her new role as the brains of the operation. "No problem," she said, "All we have to do is talk to one person Ron Weasley can't stand. It's time to pay a visit to Draco Malfoy."
"Woohoo," Harry commented, thinking of how much he was going to hate being in Draco's debt, "This is going to be a fun conversation." Ignoring Harry's lack of enthusiasm, Ginny grabbed his hand and they started walking over to where Draco was happily dancing with Pansy, who hanging all over him.
Meanwhile, Fred and George were plotting as they were dancing. "There has to be some crazy thing we can do to be remembered at this dance," George said, deep in thought. But it was harder than he thought it would be to think of an idea. "Fred, have you got anything?" he asked after a few minutes had gone by and he hadn't had any success.
Fred shook his head, looking a little dazed. "Are you wearing perfume?" he asked, inhaling Angelina's hair. She laughed, and shook her head. "It's probably my piña colada shampoo," she realized, brushing her hair out of her eyes. Fred didn't respond for a minute.
"Piña colada," he said dazedly. It should have been a question, but it was more of a statement. "Fred Weasley, what are you thinking?" Angelina asked, staring into his eyes trying to figure him out.
"Piña colada," he repeated, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Angelina and Alicia looked at him in confusion, but George suddenly looked like he understood. "Brilliant!" he said, clapping Fred on the shoulder, "Bloody brilliant!"
"Oh, just tell us what you're on about!" Alicia exclaimed, sick of not understanding what the twins were talking about. Fred grinned the same grin he always got right before he played a great prank. It was also the same grin that came before he got a week's worth of detention from McGonagall for 'unseemly disruptions' in Transfiguration.
"Do any of you remember the party we had at my house over the summer? The one where we turned the backyard into a beach and served piña coladas?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. The two girls nodded, not really seeing where he was going. "Well, do you remember Bill and the piña coladas?" he continued impishly.
It took a minute, but it eventually dawned on them what Fred was talking about. "You mean when Bill was trying to spike Percy's piña colada and he accidentally spiked his own and got totally sloshed and made a complete fool of himself and Fleur wouldn't speak to him for the rest of the evening?" Angelina asked, summarizing the story.
Fred and George nodded together. "Well, what do you say we add a little spice to this shindig?" Fred asked, sounding completely ridiculous. "As stupid as you sound, and your idea is, I'm in if everyone else is," Alicia was the first to agree. Angelina and George, after thinking about it for a second, agreed as well.
"Can I ask who we're targeting?" George asked, taking in all the people in the Great Hall and realizing that it would be better to tackle one or two than the whole crowd. Fred had to think about that. His one weakness in pranking was sometimes not thinking his ideas fully through before announcing them.
"Well, I don't think it would be a good idea to go after Snape after what he went through already. He might rather kill us than give us detention as punishment. But it would be way more fun to go after an adult than a kid," Fred pointed out. He was right, though. Seeing someone like McGonagall drunk would be so much funnier than seeing someone like Harry drunk. It would be more unexpected.
"A professor or a guest?" Alicia asked, getting into the fun. It was a good question. Although both Fred and George would have loved to get Lucius Malfoy back for all the times he'd insulted their father, they knew that that was not a smart move. "I think a professor would be funny," chipped in Angelina, "Not McGonagall, though, because she'd give us detention for ages. I'd rather not get more than a week."
Suddenly, the perfect answer dawned on them. It would be unexpected and funny, but they would probably get a less serious punishment. "Professor Lupin," Fred said naughtily. The other three nodded. "Perfect," they agreed, "Should be interesting."
The soon-to-be prank target and his crazy best friend were over at the punch bowl while all this was going on. "What are *you* doing here?" Lucius asked disdainfully, taking a sip of champagne. Sirius was reluctant to make a comeback now that he was actually over here. He was full of talk, but he'd rather spice up the dance while retaining all his limbs.
"I'm *here* to get some *champagne*," he said coolly. Lucius looked at Cissa, and they both laughed. "Lupin, you're actually planning on letting Black drink champagne? Is that really in your best judgment after what happened during I Never?" Cissa asked, looking at Sirius with contempt.
Sirius made a face. He had never liked Cissa. She had always been such a snob, and marrying Lucius had only intensified it. "What exactly happened during I Never?" Lucius asked, curious about any embarrassing information on Sirius. Cissa grinned. "Sirius had a few too many shots and got so drunk Lupin had to piggyback him down the hall," she said, sniggering as she remembered it.
Sirius burst out laughing. "Aw Remmie, I forgot about getting a piggyback," he said, "Don't worry, I won't get so drunk you'll have to piggyback me this time." Remmie eyed him warningly. "You won't get drunk at all," he said, picking up a bottle of champagne and pouring some into a glass, "I'm trusting you, Sirius. I know you can handle one glass."
Lucius and Cissa exchanged glances. They had had enough experience to know that trusting Sirius was never a smart idea. "Well, if you're planning on hanging around the punch bowl, then we're certainly not. We'll be talking to Snape. If you do anything embarrassing that would make great blackmail, come on over. If not, do us a favor and don't bother us," Lucius said, flipping his hair as he took Cissa's arm and they walked off.
"Remmie, aren't you going to have any champagne?" Sirius asked, noting that he hadn't poured himself any. Lupin shook his head, and Sirius rolled his eyes. "Oh come on Remmie, don't be a party pooper," he said, making Lupin feel as if he was having déjà vu, "Just have one glass. You know you can handle one glass!"
Sighing, Remmie decided there was no use arguing with him. One glass of champagne couldn't hurt anyone. Besides, it wasn't like having a glass of champagne himself would influence how trashed Sirius got.
In a secluded corner of the Great Hall, Snape and Ally were standing trying to remain inconspicuous. Neither of them had their wands on them, so they couldn't summon any clothes. And it would be far too embarrassing to ask anyone else to do it for them. That meant Ally was stuck in the slip to her dress, and all Sevvie had to wear was his makeshift sheet-toga. Without it, he would certainly be in trouble.
"Sevvie, Ally, how have you been?" Lucius asked as he and Cissa breezed over to them. Ally smiled briefly at Cissa, but Sevvie glared at Lucius almost as evilly as he often looked at certain Gryffindors. "What?" Lucius asked resentfully, taking another sip of champagne and giving Sevvie what he intended to be a winning half-smile.
Of course, Sevvie being Sevvie, it had no effect on him. "What?" he spat in shock, "You think you can just summon your boxers right off me in front of almost the entire school, forcing me to wear a sheet-toga, and then waltz over here and act like everything is okay?"
"They were my boxers in the first place!" Lucius argued, resisting the urge to take them out of his pocket and slap Sevvie across the face with them, just for fun. "What kind of man wears that kind of boxers, anyway?" Snape pointed out, shaking his head.
Lucius gaped at him, insulted as he always was when people said anything bad about his style. It was something he prided himself on almost as much as he did his hair, and he always got very distraught when it was criticized. Cissa had learned this over the years, but Sevvie had either never caught on or decided to ignore it.
"Look, Lucius honey, Sev obviously isn't in the mood to talk," Cissa put in, trying to avoid a huge scene in front of everyone, "Why don't we just go back to your room?" Lucius was all set to agree, but Sevvie shook his head vehemently. "No!" he said nervously, "I mean, no that's not a good idea. I mean, how about Ally and I go back to the room instead."
There was no way Lucius was going to agree to that though, even if it was solely because it was what Sevvie wanted. "No. If we can't go back to the room, then neither can you," he said, sounding very spoiled and immature.
"For Merlin's sake, Lucius, you are impossible," Snape retorted. Lucius mimicked him, making both Cissa and Ally start to laugh. "Are you making fun of me?" he asked indignantly.
The two girls shook their heads. "You know what, let's compromise," Ally suggested tentatively, "Why don't we all go back to your room?" Cissa agreed, and after some persuading, Lucius and Sevvie relented too. They started walking toward the doors, Sevvie blushing and holding his toga tightly around him.
Just as they were about to leave to go down to Snape's dungeon room, however, Professor Dumbledore managed to stroll right in front of them, blocking their exit. "Excuse me," Lucius said coolly, trying (and failing) to brush the Headmaster aside.
"Yes, excuse you," Dumbledore chuckled, not moving in the slightest, "If I might be so bold as to make a request. As you can see, most of the school is now in the Great Hall. I think it would be in everyone's best interest if you would all just stay, mingle, and keep an eye on things. Would you do that?"
Lucius refrained from cursing the Headmaster for ruining his fun (or slapping him across the face with his boxers), but he was certainly thinking about it in his head. "Of course we would," he said, gritting his teeth and smiling so that he wouldn't lose his reputation as a respectable school governor. Of course, the Too Sexy boxers couldn't have helped him much, but he didn't want any further damage done.
"Excellent!" Dumbledore said, clapping his hands, "I appreciate your cooperation. Thank you." Snape managed a small smile. "Not at all," he said, turning on his heel and walking back towards his corner with Ally, Cissa, and Lucius following behind.
