PAY ATTENTION TO THE DISCLAIMER THAT APPEARS BELOW. IT WILL NOT BE REPEATED! IF YOU MISS IT BY SKIPPING AHEAD TO THE LATEST CHAPTER, THAT'S NOT MY FAULT!
A/N: Two or three years ago, my brother (the Heel Killer) began writing what I believe will be his life's work. Okay, maybe not, but he's been working on it for nearly three years, so there must be something to be said about that. Anyway, due to circumstances beyond our control (the hard drive in our three year old computer finally died) and reasons originating in our natures (he and I are both self-proclaimed perfectionists), the story was removed from on the basis that it had too many plotholes. This is, mostly, true: his story was positively up to its eyeballs in plotholes and incontinuities.
In the beginning, I had a story to go along with his, but in a different character's point of view. My story, believe it or not, actually began and existed prior to my brother's work. The main difference was in the author: I perceived that my/our work was ridden with too many faults and imperfections, and so I desisted, letting my side of his story disappear.
Eventually, I became involved in his story once again, this time as co-writer of his version. That, in essence, meant that I wrote the parts depicting my character and supplied his lines: he was still in control. Gradually, I was given a little more leverage until we were of about equal rank, and that's around the time he decided to revise the story. However, by this time, the blasted thing was so huge, simple revision of the thing would be, frankly, quite impractical. (Data loss around that time didn't help matters any.) Therefore, we decided to trash the thing and rebuild our efforts, anew. I also decided that trying to construct a parallel novel beside his story would be worth another shot, and that brings us to where we are.
Each of our stories will seem to stand well enough on its own in the beginning, but I don't doubt that, as we go along, you will need to have read each to understand some of the references or jokes contained within. Therefore, I must urge you to read the Heel Killer's work, The Story of My Life, I Think as well as my own. If you won't do this, at least read his prologue. With that said, the disclaimer appears below. I WILL NOT REPOST THIS DISCLAIMER. UNDERSTOOD? Good.
Disclaimer: The only character that I own is Kaji Fireson. All others are the property of some other person or entity, such as Square Enix, World Wrestling Entertainment, Kazuki Takahashi, Akiro Toriyama, etc., etc. The Heel Killer is the property of himself (I hope), and, if any other original character pops up, they are either the property of myself, the Heel Killer, or themself (and I will notify you as to who they belong). How about we get on with the show?
Chapter One: The Battle with Diablo
"There," I said with great satisfaction as I smashed the stone with a particularly large hammer. "Now there's only one thing left to do." With that, I pulled out a large, blue book, read a few words from it, and stepped through the blue portal that appeared. When I arrived at the new location, I looked around at the bland, metallic grey walls and fortifications that had become all too familiar over the past few days.
A few moments later, a familiar face lifted my spirits somewhat as he rushed up to me while leaning on his walking stick. "Excellent work, hero!" he exclaimed. "Surely, even in his sanctuary, Diablo felt the fury released when you smashed his brother's soulstone!"
"I don't doubt it, Cain," I replied. "And I'll make sure that Diablo meets the same fate."
"If you manage to defeat the Lord of Terror, it will be quite a feat, indeed! Mephisto may have been a challenge, but Diablo will be ten times more difficult to defeat in battle. You need to be both physically and mentally prepared for this battle like never before! Therefore-"
Suddenly, an explosion rocked the Pandemonium Fortress.
"I don't believe our friend here will get the chance to prepare, Cain," Tyrael, the Archangel who is known for looking out for the mortal men, announced. "Diablo has assaulted the Fortress!"
"Looks like it's go time to me," I declared. I stopped by the resident healer to restore the energy I had lost in the previous battle, then moved to the head of the stairway leading from the Pandemonium Fortress, Heaven's Final Fortification, to the Outer Steppes of Hell, the site that would be the location of my battle with Diablo.
Before going any further, I suppose I should probably explain the situation. My name is Kaji Fireson. I am, primarily, a sorcerer, and it is my main goal to purge the world of the three Prime Evils. I have already disposed of Mephisto, the first. The second, Diablo, stared up at me from the foot of the stairs. The third, Baal, currently eluded me completely. Assisting me in this quest is the last of the Horadrim, the venerable Deckard Cain, whose knowledge of magical items is unsurpassed on this plane. There's also the archangel, Tyrael.
"Hello, down there!" I called down to the King of Demons as if he were a fellow man I was conversing with. "Give me a little room, will you, so that I can come down there and fight you!"
"That's what I'm here for, isn't it?" he replied cockily before backing off several hundred yards, giving me room to descend the steps.
"You must be pretty confident, Diablo, if you're going to fight fair," I retorted, allowing my voice to be tinted a bit by cockiness, as well. He said nothing, however, and I charged down the steps into battle. I stopped about two stairs from the bottom and realized that if I dove headlong into battle, Diablo was going to pounce on me...and that is NOT a good thing. I needed to be more cautious. That, or...
I stepped out into the Outer Steppes and, as I had suspected, Diablo charged me. Luckily, I knew how to teleport out of the way. "You'll have to work harder than that to hit me!" I taunted. Diablo answered by swinging his tail back at me, forcing me to jump out of the way. Even so, one of the spikes on his tail nicked me on the way by. This will not be easy, I thought.
"Not so cocky anymore, are we?" Diablo taunted in return, turning around. I answered him by blasting him in the face with a Fire Ball. A couple of char marks appeared, but he was, overall, unharmed. "But you still have some fight in you? That's good. I wouldn't want to think I was the only one taking any pleasure from this fight!"
I smirked. "You needn't worry about that, Diablo," I replied. "The pleasure is all mine!" I charged him, teleported just as he swung at me in retaliation, and launched a move that I had dubbed "Infer-nova". I watched as the ring of fire approached Diablo, then smirked when it connected. However, the smirk soon turned into a frown, as Diablo, once again, was largely unharmed. This will not be easy OR quick... Then, Diablo did something I couldn't believe: he used an Infer-nova of his own! I simply waited for the right moment, then teleported inside the ring of fire, avoiding harm. I also teleported out of Diablo's reach when he tried to punch me again.
My strategy for the battle was simple: get in a hit with a Fire Ball or Meteor when I could, teleport out of the way of Diablo's attacks, hit him with another Fire Ball, dodge, wash, rinse, repeat, repeat, repeat. This worked well for awhile. However, the strategy, used over a long period of time, took its toll, and I was hesitant to use my sole remaining Rejuvenation Potion. Therefore, when I ran low of mana, I started attacking Diablo with my staff to give myself time to recover. Near the end of our battle, I was even using the telekinesis skill I had learned to make my staff fly around and whap Diablo in the back of the head before zipping out of reach. This was refreshing for me, but Diablo didn't like it that much...of course, he was thrilled when he finally figured out my attack pattern, turned around at just the right moment, and blasted my staff with a demonic punch, shattering it into about a thousand chips. He followed up quickly with a Bone Prison, trapping me within. I tried to teleport out, but found that I had run out of energy playing around with my staff. When Diablo saw me struggling to escape, he laughed.
"Oh, how the mighty have fallen!" he cooed. "No mana left to teleport away? Too bad for you. I was just beginning to think-"
At this point in his tirade, he was so confident that I was doomed that he turned around, allowing me to down my last potion. I got the container back into my belt before he turned around again.
"-would have been only the second person to ever accomplish that feat, but now, all your hard work will come to naught! Any last words?"
This is going to be cutting it close...this skill takes a lot of mana out of me... I thought as he spoke, but I now replied, "Yes...just one."
"What is that?" Diablo asked out of curiosity, raising his hands in preparation for the move that would seal my fate.
"Teleportation."
I teleported out of my prison and behind Diablo. Not fooled, he turned around quickly, threw his hands forward, and yelled, "LIGHTNING INFERNO!"
I matched him with "FLAMING INFERNO!"
The two streams of hot death flew at each other, met about half-way, and began fighting one another for dominance.
I can't afford to have him stall me like this! I don't know how long I can keep this up...
"It appears we are evenly matched, mortal," Diablo stated with just the slightest hint of strain in his voice.
"Thank you, Captain Obvious," I replied in much the same tone (though I fought to keep my struggling out of my voice).
"Even the one who defeated me last time could not boast the feat of matching my Lightning Inferno," Diablo began again, effort becoming slightly more evident in his voice.
"Yeah, well, I worked hard on this spell," I answered, still keeping as much strain out of my voice as I could. The two spells were still pretty much even.
"Do you think you could possibly outlast me?" he asked viciously, though it was obvious the battle had taken its toll.
"I'll certainly try," I replied in much the same tone. The effort was now obvious in my voice as well.
"Well, then I'd better end this NOW!" he cried as he poured all his remaining energy into his Lightning Inferno, and it began winning against my Inferno.
Oh, no you don't! I thought, and I threw all of my remaining power behind my Inferno. My spell began inching back toward the middle and beyond.
"No!" Diablo cried as my Inferno inched ever closer to him. "This isn't possible! I refuse to believe it!"
"Believe it!" I replied. I remained constant in my efforts, even as I began drifting towards unconsciousness. Soon, my Flaming Inferno had completely defeated Diablo's Lightning Inferno and began destroying Diablo's life. His cries of agony were music to my ears. Just as they died down, I lost consciousness. However, I managed to construct one final coherent thought before doing so: It's finally over.
Well, there it is: the first chapter of my story. If it seemed too short, don't fret: future chapters will almost certainly be longer. Comments and feedback are most welcome. Constructive criticism is definitely welcome, but flames will simply fuel the fire, so don't bother.
