August 27, 2005
Today it was a little easier. And last night, I actually fell asleep after a nice long conversation online with an old friend. One who didn't know my past and so it was random, and not bombarded with all the emotions of the rest of my life.
It was a nice feeling, even if it didn't last long.
I went to a baseball game tonight. My sister, Samantha, was there, with her boyfriend. It seems to give her joy to call me a whore for whatever reasons.
Maybe she'd stop if she knew I was single.
Maybe if she knew just how we ended.
But I'll give her the joy of not knowing, of being able to insult me like nothing is wrong. Why should she have to worry about how her big sister feels?
That… and I don't want to hear any of the shit she might try and tell me. She never liked him, but like most people… she didn't know him.
Where was I? I ended last time about how we met. So I guess I'll go into the next few times we hung out.
It was one week after I had first met Darien and Andrew. Lita, Ken, and I were back at the bowling alley (our soon to be new Friday and weekend routine) and once again, I had left Seiya behind. I told him it was friend time again, and truly, it was. I really just wanted to hang out and yea… I wanted that hanging out to include my two new friends. And with the way they joke about me, it just made sense.
It was a while before we ran into them, but honestly, once they get there, you don't miss them. Darien is just so… tall! And Andrew, well, with his mass of hair, they make quite the site.
"Hey Batman," Andrew said, giving me and Lita hugs. This boy is so friendly!
"Hey Andrew. Hi Darien." I greeted both of my newest friends.
This time we spent more time in the arcade than the actual bowling alley. Andrew had a thing for the game "Hydro Thunder," a boat racing game where the seat vibrates. And since Lita had a thing for Andrew, we followed.
I got some tokens after Andrew's race and played. Lita made fun of me because I got the chair that didn't vibrate… very nice friends, huh? She also took immense pleasure in once again reminding that I could look, but I couldn't touch. Something I was finding more and more irritating as time went on.
Later that night, the Batman jokes took a turn for the worse. Well, worse might be the wrong word.
"I'd like to get in Batman's utility belt."
"…"
"Hmmm, batcave….!"
"…"
Now, don't normally, I have a comeback for every dirty joke. Most people tell me that it'd be an improvement if I got my mind UP to the gutter. But there was something about Darien in which I was at a loss for words. I'd awkwardly smile as Lita, Andrew, and Ken roared with laughter. What was I to say? I had a boyfriend. So I could only look.
That night ended with more hugs from the two boys and more jokes made about me. It seemed that I was Darien's… fixation for sexual innuendo. He wanted to get into my batcave and try out my bat toys. The problem being I didn't own any and if I did, the right to use them went to my boyfriend, Seiya.
That was the other weird thing. I couldn't blame Darien for anything he said because I hadn't mentioned Seiya at all to him or Andrew. And as cute as I found Andrew, I knew I had to lay off. Though I thought at first he might like me, I found him and Lita in the starts of something.
And in contrast, I mentioned Darien and Andrew a lot to Seiya. But I didn't tell him everything. He was so down; I couldn't find myself telling him what a great time I had. I have found myself apologizing for things I'm not sorry for because I feel like I should. I don't know.
All I know is that Lita and I had plans to meet up with Darien and Andrew Saturday night (tomorrow) and 9pm. And I wasn't bringing Seiya.
We got there a little early the next night, because I knew my mom wouldn't be thrilled at me leaving at 9pm. Plus, I had a midnight curfew and I wanted to spend as much time out of the house as possible.
That night was hilarious. I met Lita's friend Eli after Darien and Andrew showed up. I was introduced as "Batman."
"You're my hero!" Eli exclaimed as he hugged me and pet my hand. My eyes bulged as he finished petting my hand and brought it up to his mouth and kissed it. I was laughing out of slight embarrassment, but also once again secretly glad with the absence of Seiya.
However, Darien was there and who knew how happy he was about it. I was still the butt of all his sexual jokes and I still didn't know what to think of it. There was still the hot tattooed girl. But all I knew was that I was going to be seeing him and Andrew on a weekly basis and that I wasn't bringing Seiya.Ever. Because... boys don't mix well.
The only part I felt slightly guilty about was how much I found myself looking forward to Friday. Looking forward to seeing two boys who were not my boyfriend. Even though nothing had happened… I was starting to feel bad. Why wasn't I this excited to see Seiya? Especially with Valentine's Day in a week. You'd think that with my favorite holiday coming up (even though I had never had a special one) and me with someone to share it with for the very first time, I'd be looking forward to that more than anything. Wrong.
After we left that night, Lita and I talked on the phone, like we had been doing for a while now. I found out that Darien and Andrew were living in a tent in town, because they both had been kicked out by their families. It was just… wow. I didn't change my opinion of them, but I just got reminded of something most people don't think of every day. Be thankful for what you have. And be aware of how things like this stick in people's minds… and not always in the best way.
I know this chapter might be kind of confusing…I don't really know. I know a lot of detail is missing, and I'm sorry. It took me a little bit to write it because I'm writing this story from my past (I just thought I would mention that, because I want to try and be as accurate as possible) and I had to search through boxes to find my journal from that period of time. So yea. All reviews are welcome; I won't take offense if it's constructive. You can take the time to tell me I suck if you really wish but I'll let you know now that I won't care. Hahaha. ;) I hope you enjoy this, and I will reiterate that the more feedback I get, the more inspired I will become. Hope to get out more in the next week or sooner, but no promises, as I'm moving in the next ten days. But I'm an insomniac, so we'll see.
Thanks to lonewriter66 and tkdl for your reviews. You two alone took the time out to review and that means a ton to me.
And oh, disclaimer for this chapter and the last… maybe future to: I don't own the character names that you recognize from Sailor Moon. However, I do own the story, as it is from my own life. All other names may or may not have been changed.
