Who Lies Beneath

Disclaimer: I own nothing, so therefore don't sue me. Gilmore girls belongs to ASP and the WB.

Summary: LL. "There's only one thing that can stop me." She told her best friend... She's made many mistake before, but which one's the mistake this time? The wedding, or the night before?

Authors Note: Here we go again! First off, so sorry for the incredibly long update. I had a really hard time starting this chapter cause it's got a lot going on but alas, it's finally here. Secondly, big thanks to everybody that's reviewed! It would be great to personally thank all of you but I'm afraid it's almost 2 am and I don't have the strength to do that. But you guys all are amazing so thank you again! Keep leaving us feedback, we love to know what you think! I'm hoping that the 5th chapter won't take as long as this one but thanks for being patient and wanting to wait! Take care.


She couldn't drive any faster even if she tried.

Well, she probably could but there's a chance some stupid Hartford cop might pull her over and then who'd know where she'd wind up that night.

She probably wouldn't end up back in her town, yelling at Luke about how she is sad and angry and pissed and crushed that he didn't come after her. She wanted to blame him, to rub it in his face, that what they did that night—despite how earth shattering it was—has made her absolutely miserable.

It hadn't hit her yet; hit her that it really wasn't his fault, hit her that the visit soon to come was probably going to be a disaster if she said everything she wanted to say.

And oh, she had a lot to say.

xx

It wasn't until she reached Stars Hollow when she realized it was raining.

Not the kind of 'I'm singing in the rain' rain. It wasn't soft, warm summer rain which she loved. It was dark and cold and thunder was crashing threw the sky as she drove the familiar streets. Lightning struck occasionally, but wasn't as constant as the roaring crashes that at this point, drove her nuts. Though the wind blowing in threw her cracked window didn't bug her very much.

Her face was somewhat calm (which was relief) and content. She tried to concentrate on the road as much as possible but it was tough with everything on her mind.

xx

It only took about 20 minutes to get into town this time. It wasn't until she passed her old house when she realized how serious she was about all of this. She was going to tell him how she feels.

She pulled into a parking spot far down the street from the diner just so she could make sure if she chickened out that he wouldn't spot her, at least right away. She turned off her engine and sighed loudly as she stared out the window at the Luke's Diner sign.

Her eyes quickly averted to his apartment. Her stomach fell to a pit when she realized, she had to do this because it has been haunting her mind, day in, day out. Plus, she ditched her own comfort party to come here.

She sighed, taking the keys out of the ignition and opening her door harshly. She slammed it shut and started running threw the rain as quick as possible. It wasn't too far but it was wet and slippery and her running was a bet delayed.

She ran facing down, afraid she'd see somebody she knew and embarrass the hell out of herself. It only took her a minute or so until she was crossing the alley near Luke's and was running onto the beginning of the sidewalk near the building.

An abrupt noise caused her to look up when she did. She swung her head to the front and glanced at Luke who was facing away from her, putting the 'CLOSED' sign on the door. Her heart beating faster and faster as she approached the diner, legs threatening to give up, she make it to the front near the door.

It wasn't until she was only a few feet away from him that he realized somebody was near by. He turned around and was clearly speechless, as was she. The both stared at each other as she took her final steps towards him. She was still being drenched by the rain unlike him who was standing on top of the steps.

Lost for words? Yes, but it was honestly now or never.

"Why didn't you come after me!" She screamed over the rain, her breath still heavy and rapid.

Her voice almost sounded like she was begging. She wanted her answer though; she didn't come here to play silent treatment with Luke.

After a few minutes of no response, she sighed heavily. He wasn't going to say something? No, after all she had been threw to get here she was going to get her answers.

"Why didn't you come after me Luke? I waited for you!" She shouted again, hoping it would permit some sort of facial expression at least, but nonetheless, it didn't. "I waited for you ever since I left your apartment that morning and you never came!"

Her breathing was becoming more and more labored from having to scream over the rain. He wouldn't come any closer to her though and she wasn't going to be the one to run up there and wrap her arms around him.

She waited for what felt like forever for her response. She wanted her answers and she wanted them now. She kept steady eye contact with him, hoping that she could get some answers from at least the look he shot her way. But never put it past Luke to make this the most complicated experience of her life. She had no idea what he was thinking or how he was feeling. She wanted to know everything though. She wanted to know the answers of her questions most because she never expected to ask him these things in the first place. This wasn't what she had planned as to be her first words.

Complete opposite actually.

"Say something, Luke!" He had no words though, no answers for her.

Nothing that she'd want to hear at least.

"Didn't you get my note?" She yelled.

She begged him this time, with her eyes to answer her. She needed it like it was coffee. Besides the idiotic feeling of embarrassment, she wanted to know what she did wrong, what she did to make him keep his distance.

"Of course I got your note, Lorelai! I must have read it over 50 times that day too!" He finally spoke. His voice was loud and sounded bitter. It wasn't the kind of voice she wanted to hear coming from him but hey, right now, it's better than nothing at all.

"Well did you understand what I was saying?" She asked. "I told you that you could stop me, Luke, I told you."

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but you gave me permission to ruin your wedding." Luke stepped down the steps and approached her. "You gave me permission to stop you from saying yes to Max who thought you wanted to be with him. You gave me the opportunity to humiliate myself in front of the whole town…"

"But--" She started but he cut her off.

"No, just…listen for a second Lorelai. You spent the night with me and left the next morning with no word but a one sentence note that could possibly be the most confusing note I've ever received in my life. You told me I could be your…your hero and save you from the disastrous wedding you claim you didn't want to be apart of. But you know what Lorelai? That wasn't my job! It wasn't my job to save the day and sweep you off your feet at the alter. I told you how I felt that night; I told you what you meant to me. And you had nothing to say in return."

She searched for words but they just weren't coming to her head. Luckily, he still had more to say.

"How do you think that made me feel? Not too good in case you were wondering. You knew where I was in the game. You knew I wanted to be with you more than anything so it was your decision to make. Not mine. Because to me, the impression you left me with was that…that was your last scheme while being a single woman. That, that night was a joke and meant nothing to you. It was just your final time having fun and enjoying life without being married to someone."

Lorelai's heart sank and eyes widened as she heard what he was saying.

"You thought it was a joke, Luke?"

"It sure as hell seemed like it!" They were back to screaming because the rain was coming down quicker and louder than before.

Lorelai couldn't believe it. Was he insane? He ought to be to have a thought like that.

"Great, I'm so relieved to know that you thought it was a joke. I'm so glad that you realized me spending the night with my best friend of 4 years, the night before my wedding, risking everything I had going for me was a joke!" She said in absolute sarcasm. "I'm so happy you realized that it meant nothing to me when it meant more than anything in the world to me, Luke! I'm not that kind of girl. I'm not that kind of girl who makes love to somebody else the night before her wedding. I don't know what kind of impression you've gotten from me these past 4 years or so, but it doesn't seem like a pretty damn good one." She took a deep breath before continuing. "But just know this, I don't go waltzing around sleeping with anyone I can find as my final plead as a single woman. I'm not that woman and of all people to know that, I thought you'd know that best."

The words made sense to him which of course left him feeling bad. But he didn't know how to defend himself in this situation past what he had already done. He made it clear that it was her shot to take, her decision. He made it clear he wanted to be with her. He made it all clear.

Including the fact that he thought she thought it was a joke.

Bad idea cause now, he didn't have words to defend himself.

"Why did you do it?" He asked.

"What?"

"Why did you come over that night?"

"We were fighting!" She said as if she should have known that, well, because he should have. "I wanted to apologize to you! I wanted to make things better with us before they could get even worse!"

"But why did you want me to kiss you?" He shouted. "Why did you sleep with me that night?"

She looked into his eyes and shook her head to the side. "I wanted to be with you."

"We're you scared?" He asked in general. Scared to marry, scared to be with him, scared to experience this new side of him she's never seen before.

"To death," she said loudly, "but do I regret it? No. Luke, I've been going crazy recently. I don't know what inspired me to come here but I missed you! And I wanted you to come to my party tonight, I know you were invited, Rory told me. I don't know why I thought you'd show. And when I saw you weren't coming, I knew I had to come here because I needed to talk to you since we never did talk about it before I moved away. And now, I don't know what to say. I came here with a completely different plot in my head, different things to say and people to blame but there's a reason these things came out of my mouth instead."

"I let you know I was in Lorelai. It wasn't my choice to make." He said completely avoiding everything else she had said.

It wasn't until then that she realized it was just about all her fault. It wasn't until a solitary tear rolled down her cheek that she realized it really was her fault.

"I know Luke. I know." He couldn't really tell the tears from the rain but he knew she was crying by the sound in her voice.

They spent the next minute or so looking deep into each others eyes, not sure what to say next. They had cleared certain things up, yes, but there was still plenty to say. But there are times when situations are too intense that words can't be spoken. Every possible thing sounds wrong in your head.

There are times you don't know what to say and only actions can speak for you.

She breathed in deeply before approaching him. She kept steady eye contact with him as she walked closer to him and threw herself in his arms. She pressed her lips hard against his, wrapping her arms around his upper half, making him hold her. The power of her body against his almost knocked him off his feet. She pushed her body into his, wanting to be closer than ever to him.

She didn't want to let him go and made sure to see that didn't happen.

The rain was getting in the way of things but it didn't bother them. They spent the next few minutes in that same position before Lorelai opened her mouth and increased their level of kissing. That—that—exact feeling rung threw her body again. The same feeling she felt when she was with him before. The feeling only he could give her. The feeling she thought she'd never experience again.

They were too distracted to realize that the rain was coming down harder. When it thundered again, they both snapped out of it. They still remained kissing, but realized where they were and what exactly they were doing, a mere five minutes after what they were last screaming about. But when it thundered, Lorelai realized she couldn't separate herself away from him because she was terrified that he'd think he was making a mistake, being with her again, only this time while she was married. But truth has it; he was just as terrified of letting go as she was.

They tried staying that way as possible but after a good handful of minutes, they knew they had to come to an end sooner or later. At least out here.

Surprisingly, it was Lorelai of the two to pull away first. She quickly separated her face away from his and grabbed a hold of his hands and wrapped them around her waist. She leaned into him, hugging his waist as she pressed her face against his, kissing him quickly. She moved her mouth over to his ear and kissed the side of it.

"Take me upstairs." She whispered, breathlessly.

He kissed the side of her cheek before leading her into the now closed diner. It sure was early to be closing up but she realized the rain—and her party—probably prevented a lot of people from coming in. She held his hand, walking quickly behind him up the stairs to his apartment door. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before walking in with him. But to take the awkwardness of being here yet again, he kissed her as soon as the door was shut. She closed her eyes and tried to relax. She tried to forget about what a horrible wife she was being and most importantly, she tried to ignore the feelings that things might end up the same way as last time and that was the absolute last thing she wanted.

Luke guided her to his bed and lowered her gently down onto it. He leaned his body over her but she pulled him down on top of her and flipped positions so that she was lying on top of him. She wanted to be as close as possible to him and that's what she was going to do. They adjusted themselves against his pillows so they were leaning up a bit more making it easier for the both of them. Luke rubbed her arms slowly before removing her soaking wet coat. It was then that Lorelai noticed how wet they both were.

"Wait." She said pulling away.

Luke's stomach dropped, afraid that she was going to say this was all a mistake. He tried to deny the words soon to come out of her mouth as much as possible. He bit his lip from protesting.

She started stripping off his clothes as quick as possible in attempt to warm the both of them up. He got her clue that she wasn't going any where, just trying to make this more enjoyable for the both of them because right now their freezing cold clothes weren't any help.

It was only seconds till they were stripped down to nothing and situating themselves on the bed. She took one last look at him before closing her eyes and just letting everything go for once.

xx

It was nice to be carefree once in a while.

It was nice not worrying about one main thing non-stop.

It was nice giving things a rest for a while so she could enjoy something else.

She cuddled close to his body as his arms were tightly wrapped around her, pulling her in closer to him. She had her head rested against his chest, enjoying the impromptu kisses on the top of her head. She looked up at him and smiled, kissing him softly on the cheek.

"Hi." She whispered, still smiling.

He was glowing. Or gloating. Or maybe it was both. But whatever the hell it was, she loved it.

"Hi back." He said quietly.

"Still cold?" She asked.

He shook his head and tightened his grip around her a little bit more.

"Are you?"

"I think I'm about right." She said grinning up at him.

She turned her head and glanced at the clock. It was almost 10:00. It wasn't that late but it was late enough for her to be getting tired. She closed her eyes and buried her face in his neck.

"I'm tired." She mumbled.

"Go to sleep." He said rubbing her back.

She was already headed down that road. Her eyes already closing on her, but she wanted to tell him something before she fell dead asleep.

"I'll be here in the morning, Luke." She whispered.

He closed his eyes and sighed peacefully.

"I promise."

With no response back, she quickly drifted off into sleep right in his arms.

xx

It was probably the best night of sleep she's gotten since the night before her wedding. She spent the whole night in that same position, wrapped in his arms.

She opened her eyes slowly, preventing herself from being blinded by the sun. She moved only her head to see if Luke was up but he was still soundly sleeping. It wasn't going to be like last time though. She wasn't going to wait over a month to see him wake up.

She sat there for over 30 minutes watching him sleep, filling her head with thoughts about what would happen next. She never really figured that out. She had an idea, a plot, as to what she wanted to happen. She knew she had it all laid out but it was making it happen, making it work, that was what she needed to figure out.

She was getting anxious waiting for him to wake up. She had been waiting over a half an hour and realized…she had no idea what time it actually was. She glanced at the clock, it was 11 am. It had been over 12 hours since she went 'missing' last night. She just realized that she never called last night and they were all probably worried about her.

But then she looked at Luke and suddenly everything seemed okay, except for the pang of excitement in her side. She kissed his neck a few times in attempt to wake him up but clearly it took more than that.

"Luke." She said quietly, shaking him awake. "Wake up, Luke."

Slowly, he began opening his eyes, trying as hard as possible to avoid the sunlight just like she did.

"Morning sleeping beauty." She said giggling a bit.

"Mmm," he moaned and kissed the top of her head, beginning to wake himself up even more so, "morning."

"Sleep well?" She asked. She sat up and straddled her arms on either side of his chest, lowering her upper half against his.

"Better than well." He stretched his arms over his head and grinned to himself, loving the fact that she was still there.

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"It's 11:00."

"What?" He shot up in bed.

"It's…"

"The diner's supposed to open at 6!" He explained.

"Don't…don't worry about it." She said slowly, trying to get him to lie back down.

"I'm sure every lunatic of Stars Hollow is lined up in front of the diner right now."

"Not to worry my dear, I got everything taken care of." She said putting her finger to his mouth, trying to hush him up.

"What do you mean?" He said removing her hand and holding it in his.

"I called Caesar this morning. I asked him to let everybody know that the diner wouldn't be open till this afternoon. He came here this morning and put a sign up on the door."

He smiled genuinely at her. "Thank you."

"It was my pleasure."

They both new their conditions were awkward. They both understood the circumstances they had both put themselves in yet again but this time it was different. This time something better was going to happen.

"I should probably start getting things ready for today." He said, not wanting to.

She grumbled upon realizing her time was probably up. For today at least.

"I should get going."

"Uh, yeah, sure."

They both glanced at each other, a confident smile in tact. They got out of bed simultaneously and both got ready to do their own things.

They slowly got their acts together; Luke made her something for breakfast before she left while she took a shower.

xx

"So I should probably get going, huh?"

Luke wiped his hands on the sides of his pants, adjusting his baseball hat afterwards. "Yeah, well…"

"I should get home already, I'm sure people are…"

"Yeah, I understand…"

Everything was extremely awkward between the two of them. But for some reason, neither was mad at each other. Neither wanted to make this any weirder than it already was so that's how it was going besides just being awkward around each other.

"Come here." She wagged a finger at him and stepped closer to him. She wrapped one arm around his waist, one around his shoulders. "We will talk." She said confidently. She kissed him quickly. "You know," she mumbled against his lips, "Luke, we'll…we will figure something out."

He wrapped his arms around her and remembered their conversation from the night before.

He kissed her back passionately before responding. "I know."

"Have a good day, okay?"

"Back atcha."

She smiled and backed up towards the door still staring at him. "See you later."

He smiled and waved before she walked out of the door.

One day at a time, they both thought. One day at a time.

xx

The whole ride home Lorelai was gloating like a little girl. She never once thought about what she was going to do or say when she actually got home but for some reason, that wasn't what she cared about right now. The only thing she cared about and was currently thinking about was when the next time she'd see Luke again.

She pulled into the driveway behind Max's car. It suddenly hit her that she had to face him right now. And it was bad…because, she didn't know what she was going to say. Suddenly, guilty feelings took over her again and she didn't have the slightest idea how she was going to get out of this.

She slowly got out of the car and walked up to the stairs, searching for her keys inside her messy purse. By the time she had found them, Max had already swung the door open to greet her.

"There you are!" He practically shouted before taking her inside the house. "Where on earth have you been?" He sure wanted his answers, she thought.

Crap, she should have thought about this before. She knew something like this would come up but she still didn't have an excuse ready.

"Lorelai?" He asked, trying to get her to snap out of it.

Lorelai shook her head and tried to explain but nothing came out.

"I was starting to get really worried about you. I told Rory you just stepped out and sent her back with Lane so she didn't have to worry about you."

"Thanks." She said weakly.

"Where were you, Lorelai?" He asked a bit more seriousness in his voice.

"I…"

"You? You left your own party and didn't show up again. I had no idea where you were. I tried calling your cell phone but it was off."

"I'm sorry Max." She said quietly, trying to avoid eye contact with him.

"Is everything okay?" He asked, grabbing her hand and pulling her closer to him.

She tried to keep her distance. Yes, she had showered. But she still felt like somehow he could smell some sort of guilt on her.

"Everything's fine. I just…something came up."

"Well what happened?" He asked, curious to know where his wife was.

"I had to help a friend out with something." She blurted. It was just the first thing she could think of though.

"Who?" He asked confused. "All your friends were here at the party."

"That's not true." She said getting offended for no reason. She started walking into the kitchen hoping a fresh pot of coffee would be sitting there looking all pretty for her.

"Well you're not giving me much to base my assumptions off of."

"Well, don't assume." She rubbed her head in slow motion.

"I think I'm being pretty mature about this." He said starting to get upset. "You just left last night and I had no idea where you went. I'm not going to ask you questions. I can tell you don't want to share your answers with me but it didn't hurt to ask."

"No, it didn't." She looked up and him and smiled softly. He really was being understanding about the whole situation. Way too understanding if you asked her.

Of course he was going to be understanding about it though, he's Max after all. Absolutely crazy about her, he wouldn't dare jump on her nerves when he knew she didn't want to be bugged. She felt guilty yet again, for being so horrible to somebody who was so great to her. But, she just couldn't put forth with him. She couldn't be honest about it either because honesty equals truth and she still hadn't gained that confidence.

"Hey come here." Max walked over to her and she kissed him on the cheek. "I'm sorry. I just had to help a friend out with something, that's all. I should have called, it was wrong that I didn't but my phone died and…I was just, helping a friend."

She felt awfully repetitive but she hadn't planned some perfect plot as to why she was out. She probably should have thought about that before but she didn't have the time to think or worry. She had Luke to think about instead and that's exactly who she was thinking about on her way home instead of thinking of a golden excuse.

The rest of the day was okay. They had cleared things up without her actually explaining where she was. He wasn't going to ask questions though he had a million. But he knew better than that and if she didn't want to tell him, he wasn't going to ask.

They spent the day working on things around the house. Rory was at Lane's for most of the day so it was just the two of them. But truth has it, the whole day her mind was on Luke and how she wanted to see him. She didn't want to be home right now, cleaning up the living room with Max despite how filthy it was. She wanted to go back to Luke's and think of something, anything, to make these conditions they were in okay.

And as great and amazing as that sounded, it was completely unrealistic.

xxx

The next day, Max had a meeting most of the day. Rory was out with Dean for the day because they hadn't spent some alone time in a while so the house was left alone to Lorelai once again.

She had been thinking about going to see Luke. She thought to herself, why not? They ended out on good terms so there shouldn't be anything 'between' them. She looked at the clock; it was already almost 7:00. Rory probably wouldn't be home until at least 10 and Max was supposed to be out until around then as well.

After planning out a small pro-con list in her head, she grabbed her keys and headed out the door, driving in the direction of the diner.

Because of the traffic, it took her almost 40 minutes to get there. She parked in her old spot which wasn't being taken by an actual citizen of Stars Hollow.

She had to admit it; it was great being back in the Hollow. It was absolutely nothing like Hartford. Hartford isn't homey and small, where you can borrow a cup of sugar from just about anyone. It was more high class and business related. Huge corporate offices and rich private schools dominated the town. Not friendly diners and dance studios. And to be honest, she really did hate Hartford. She'd pick living in Stars Hollow any day of the year for as long as she lived. It just wasn't the same there. Hartford reminded her way to much of her childhood, which half the time she didn't even want to remember.

She crossed the street and walked up the stairs in front of the diner. She got nervous when she saw Luke taking an order from somebody at the counter. But she figured since they were in the public eye, they were going to have to act normal. At least as normal as possible. She casually walked in and he looked up right as she walked in. They both smiled slightly at each other as she walked up to him and approached him at the counter.

"Luke." She cooed.

"Hey." He smiled grabbing a cup of coffee and pouring her a cup.

"How are you?" She asked casually.

"Not to bad. How about yourself?"

She liked that they were normal. But she felt they were being too normal with each other and she had just gotten there. She just hoped that they weren't back to normal because despite how wrong and messed up everything was, she still wanted there to be something with them.

"I'm good." She took a sip of the coffee and made steady eye contact with him while she took her first sip. "Still good as always. I see you haven't lost your touch." She said, laughing to herself because she realized that sounded a little bit more different than intended.

"No, I haven't." He said seriously.

She grinned and took another sip.

"So things are good?" She said somewhat quietly.

"Things are good. How are things in…Hartford?" He said sort of uncomfortably.

"They're fine." She said in all honesty. They weren't good, they weren't bad. They were just…fine.

"Good, good."

They didn't really know what to say. She knew one thing though; she wanted to be alone with him right now. She wanted to go upstairs and have him to herself, to talk to him, to be with him, just…not down here with everybody watching. Because personally, the people just made it even more awkward.

"Excuse me; can I get some more coffee?" A customer in the back asked.

He broke her eye contact and grabbed the coffee pot.

"Me too, please." Another customer called out.

"Hey, why don't you take your stuff upstairs? I'll meet you there in a few minutes."

She grinned, appreciating the fact that he was trying to make this easier on the both of them. She grabbed her cup of coffee and walked up the stairs to his apartment.

She opened the door and looked around. Still looked the same as the other day. Not like she expected it to change or anything. She took a seat on the couch and rested her coffee on the table, waiting for Luke to come upstairs and join her.

It only took him a few minutes before he was able to leave the diner and come upstairs. He walked in with his hands in his back pockets, smiling nervously as he approached her on the couch.

"Sorry about that, small little rush." He explained.

"Don't worry about it."

He nodded his head and took in the awkward silence.

"So, what brings you out here?" He asked.

She turned around to face him and bit her lip nervously. "Wanted to see how you were doing." She said honestly. "You're good?"

"I'm good. You're good?"

"Yeah, I'm good."

"Well, now that we've gotten that figured out." He said slyly.

"Can you get off for the night?" She blurted.

"Me?"

"No, the other backwards baseball hat, flannel shirt wearing man in back of you. Yes, you."

"Don't you have to…?"

"Everyone's out for tonight. I've got a few hours to spare before I should probably go home."

"Yeah, well, uh…let me go tell Caesar."

"Okay."

Luke went down the stairs to clear up everything with Caesar. Since the diner was pretty dead, he trusted Caesar with the diner and told him to come upstairs if he needed anything.

By the time Luke had gotten back into the apartment, Lorelai was just sitting down, remote in hand.

"Perfect timing. The movies just about to start."

"The what?"

"Movie. I went digging threw your collection and put in the first appealing thing I saw."

Luke turned out the lights before walking back over to the couch and sitting next to her just as the opening credits came across the screen.

The movie started out fine. They sat close to each other but not nearly close enough. Lorelai wasn't paying attention much. Her mind was on other things. Things about Luke. Dirty things about Luke. Things she shouldn't be thinking about at all but she was and couldn't help it.

She wanted him to touch her. It seemed like he was a thousand feet away from her and there was nothing she could do about it. She watched him from the corner of her eye, curious to see if he would make a move in this lifetime. But the more and more she looked at him, the more and more she got the feeling that nothing was going to happen.

By the time the movie was half way threw already, there still hadn't been any progress. Of course she didn't go to his place to 'get' with him. Because it wasn't just some casual hook-up. It was more than that, something completely special and it only happened with him. She reached out her hand into the center of the couch between where their legs were but he made no recognition of her being there.

She wasn't mad. She couldn't be mad because of that. She should probably be glad that she wouldn't have to go home that night feeling guiltier than she already does. Maybe Luke wanted things to be normal with them until they thought of a solution to their problems. At least that's how he acted.

When the ending credits came on, there was still no progress between them. Lorelai turned the movie off and turned to Luke, smiling.

"Did you enjoy that movie?" She asked.

"Yeah it had been a while since I saw it."

She nodded her head wondering where to take this awkwardness next. She looked at the clock and saw that it was already 9:00.

"I should go." She said quietly. "I've got to get home."

Luke walked over and grabbed her jacket from the chair, helping her into it.

"I'm glad you got to come by." He said.

"Me too. Thanks for taking part of the night off to be with me."

"Of course."

"So…" Lorelai said.

"So…" He repeated.

"I'll see you soon?"

"Yeah, definitely."

"Okay then." With one last smile, she walked out of his apartment and closed the door shut behind her.

That was a little weird.

Certainly not how she imagined their visit to be, especially after the last. She thought about it, trying to figure out how Luke was thinking. She wanted to know what he thought about everything without directly asking him but sometimes it was just way to hard to be able to determine what somebody's thinking. Plus, she knew she'd need lots more information to base her judgments after.

During her drive home, the only thing she could think of was that he was trying to just make it normal for them. And by making it normal, it only led to more and more awkwardness but it would all be okay eventually.

At least they hoped so.

xx

Right as she was pulling in the driveway, Max pulled up right behind her. She got out of the car just as he was getting out of his.

"Fancy meeting you here." She said sarcastically.

"Hey," he gave her a quick kiss, "where were you?"

"Oh you know," of course he didn't know… "I was just out shopping around." Yes, at 9:00 at night, that's exactly where I was.

"No luck in that department, I see." He said referring to her empty hands.

"Yeah, no good sales. What can I say?" She said laughing as they walked into the house.

Lorelai walked over to the phone and saw there was a message. She listened to it and followed Max up into their room.

"That was Rory; she told us Dean would drive her home after they're finished with a movie so we should leave the front door open." Lorelai said.

"Not a problem." He changed out of his suit into his tee-shirt and shorts.

"How was your meeting?"

"Oh, long and tiring. We still haven't come up with an agreement as to what we're going to do with the money."

"You'll figure something out." Lorelai said changing out of her clothes as well.

"Yeah, we will."

As they both got finished getting ready for bed, the both slipped underneath the covers and turned the lights out.

"So you're going to drive with Rory tomorrow?" She asked.

"Yeah, poor girls going to be dead tired if she doesn't get home soon."

Lorelai glanced at the clock noticing that it was only 10:00. "She'll be home soon. She'll be okay. We're prone for staying up late and getting up early. It's yet another something we just win in."

"Don't I know it?" Max said laughing as he leaned over and kissed Lorelai on her lips.

"I love you." He said staring at her.

She smiled guiltily. "Love you too."

She turned over facing away from him because she simply didn't want to have to face him. But of course, he took the time to wrap his arms around her from behind and pull her in close to his body. She wanted nothing more than for him to be on his own side of the bed like he usually is but no…he just insisted to be with her.

It was only about 20 minutes until she could tell that he was fully asleep. He was still wrapped around her and she still wanted to get out of his grasp. She sighed loudly, rolling her eyes as she turned her head back to make sure he was absolutely sleeping.

Luckily he was a pretty dead sleeper. Once he was out, it took some convincing to get him out of bed. She lightened his grasp around her and slipped out of his embrace, getting out of bed and sneaking out with the phone. She walked downstairs and sat on Rory's bed in her room. She closed the door, leaving it cracked a little bit and kept the lights off. She sat on the bed and pulled out the phone, dialing a familiar number.

The phone rang about 4 times before he answered.

"Hello?" He sounded sleepy, probably because she just woke up him up.

"Luke?"

"Lorelai?"

"Yeah, it's me." She said quietly.

"What's the matter? Is everything okay?" He asked concerned.

"Yeah, I guess." She said unconfidently.

"Why are you calling, Lorelai?" He asked, still unsure.

"Thanks for hanging out with me tonight." She said considerately.

"Uh, no problem." He responded, confused.

"Did you have fun?" She whispered.

"Of course I did."

"Good, good…so did I."

"Well, that's good. Listen Lorelai, I've gotta--"

"Luke, I wanted…well, I want to be with you. I need to be with you when we're together."

She didn't realize until afterwards how awkward that must have been…for both of them. She waited for some sort of response from him but so far, all she was getting was silence.

"But you're…"

"I know. But I want y—it just feels right when we're together."

"But…"

"Can I see you tomorrow? During the afternoon?"

"Yeah, I guess that's fine." He said.

"Perfect. Sorry if I woke you up tonight."

"It's okay."

They were both quiet for a second before Lorelai spoke again. "Goodnight."

"Hey Lorelai?" He asked.

"Yes?"

"I know how you feel." He said honestly. "I feel the same way."

She smiled into the phone.

"I just thought you'd like to know that."

"I did." She said nodding her head though of course he couldn't see that. "Bye."

"See you later, Lorelai."

xx

"I know. But I want y—it just feels right when we're together." Rory repeated in her mind. Who on the face of this earth was her mother talking too? She started brainstorming but realized she better make it known she was here before her mother walked out on her eavesdropping.

She opened the door and glanced at her mom sitting on her bed in the dark.

"Who was that?" Rory asked right away.

Lorelai practically jumped off her bed. "Oh my god, Rory, you're home."

"Yeah, I heard part of your conversation just now…I take it that wasn't Sookie…" She said leading onto something.

Lorelai's heart began racing, wondering how much Rory actually heard. She couldn't ask her though unless she wanted to make it even more weird and obvious that she was talking to somebody she probably shouldn't have been talking to.

She got up and gave Rory a kiss on her forehead. "Don't worry about it, babe. Did you have a good time with Dean?"

Rory looked at her mother skeptically before answering. "Yeah it was good."

"Alright well get some sleep. You've got sleep tomorrow."

"Night mom."

"Night sweets."

xx

It was near 1:00 when she was on her way to town. She didn't call Luke and notify him that she was coming. She figured she didn't need to. She warned him last night so that should be good enough, she figured.

She pulled into the parking spot, fixed her hair, and then hoped out of the car. She bounced her way up the stairs and at sight of Luke, her legs almost melted. After her phone call with him last night, she was ready to show him what she wants.

She walked into the diner and by the second they made eye contact, Lorelai averted her eyes to the staircase. She walked right past all the customers and walked straight up the stairs, Luke following right behind her.

As soon as he walked in the door and shut it behind him, she was already all over him. She pressed him against the door, attacking him with her mouth and body. She pressed herself against him and made him hold her again. They stayed that way for a few minutes before Lorelai cut to the chase and practically ripped his clothes off. He was taken aback, but didn't expect anything less than this, coming from Lorelai Gilmore. He couldn't help but smile threw a kiss while she fumbled with the buttons on his jeans.

They walked over to the couch, still joined together at the lips, neither one parting for a second. Lorelai pushed him against the couch and straddled his lap while he worked on throwing her shirt over her head.

When clothes were too a minimum, she pushed him down so he was lying down and rested her wait on top of him.

xx

It wasn't supposed to happen like that. But after the night before, sexual tension was buzzing threw the both of them. So it wasn't a mistake, they both new that. It just wasn't supposed to happen that way but neither was complaining.

They didn't complain when they got re-dressed, walked down the stairs into the diner, or when she walked out of the door. Only a handful of words were shared during their time together just then but Lorelai figured they could both live with that.

But when she got in the car and drove off, she realized she didn't know where to go. She needed to talk to somebody, somebody that new her well, somebody that would tell her that this whole thing she was doing was completely unlike her.

She turned at the light and headed straight to the Independence Inn.

xx

It only took her 5 minutes to get there. As soon as she walked in, she sped past Michel who didn't even notice she walked in. She walked into the kitchen to find Sookie stirring some conjunction on the stove.

"Sook, office, now."

Sure it was no longer her office, but it was a office and she knew she was still welcome just about anywhere in that place.

"Lorelai? What's the matter?" Sookie said trailing behind her.

As soon as they got into the office, Lorelai pointed to one of the seats. "Sit." She directed.

"Honey is everything okay?" Sookie asked concerned.

"Sookie," Lorelai took a deep breath, "I need you to listen to what I'm about to tell you. And I don't want to hear a word of a response from you. I don't know if I'm ready to hear what other people have to say but I just need to tell somebody and I figured you were the only one I could tell and want to tell."

"Are you sure something isn't wrong?"

"Sookie I think I'm having an affair." She blurted.

An affair. Yes, that's what it could be called.

"You're what?" Sookie shrieked.

"I said I think I'm having an affair."

"You…Lorelai, you…with who?" She finally managed to get out.

"Luke." She said quickly.

Sookies jaw dropped to the floor. Her eyes widened and focused in on Lorelai. "You…you…you're having an affair with L-Luke!" She asked utterly surprised.

"No comments Sookie."

She 'zipped' her mouth shut and waved a hand for her to continue talking.

"I mean, I don't know." Lorelai began, pacing back and forth. "I was with him, Sookie, the day before my wedding. That was our first time being together. And then, we didn't really talk until I told him I was moving. When I told him that, he took it really hard. We hung out together everyday for the last week but nothing ever happened. Then during my party the other night, I just couldn't take it anymore. I wanted to confront him, to yell at him for making me feel so guilty. I wanted to blame him so badly, but I realized it wasn't his fault. And we ended up staying together that night as well."

Sookies mouth dropped even more so.

"So we made up and when I hung out with him last night, nothing happened. And, I mean, I was so confused. I didn't necessarily think something was going to happen but I thought maybe, just maybe a little something would happen. But nothing did. So I called him last night and told him I needed to be with him when were together."

"You--"

"Not a peep." She reminded her.

"And right now? I just came from there and I completely just took advantage of him! He was just…there! So I took him upstairs and we had sex. Just now. For the third time. But I don't think the other two times count as "sex" but it doesn't matter does it! It's still something I shouldn't be having and I am. And for gods sake, Sookie I'm married! I'm still a newlywed and I've already cheated on my husband of nearly 2 months three times, sexually, with my best friend of 4 years! That can't be right."

She continued her pacing back and forth, watching Sookie's face practically explode with emotions. She wanted to say something so bad but she new she couldn't.

"There's so much more to the story Sookie." She said in a more calm voice. "I mean, I love being with him. I feel so…special when I'm with him and I know that sounds horrible but there are something's I just can't help but feel, you know? I don't know why I'm asking you these questions or even telling you any of this since I won't let you talk but that doesn't stop me from doing it anyways. I guess I just wanted to tell you these things. I needed to get it off my chest so there, I did. And maybe one day…pretty soon, I will let you tell me what you think."

Sookie nodded her head, clearly enjoying that idea.

"But until then, I've gotta go."

And with that, Lorelai practically bolted out the door. Sookie unclasped her hand and shouted wait but they didn't hear her.

xx

The next night, Max and Lorelai were out to dinner. They had been talking about going out for a few nights now and with Rory doing something for the newspaper until around 8, they thought tonight would be a great night to do.

"So, I've been thinking." Lorelai said, stabbing her salad.

"And?"

"I'm going to take this business class. It's on Tuesdays and Thursdays but this weekend, there's actually some type of seminar and it's an overnight thing in New Haven but it should be fun and worth it."

"I think that's great. I know you haven't had the best of times alone in the house recently…"

"No, I haven't."

"So I think that would be great if you took the class."

"I do too." She said smiling. "I really think it'll be nice."

xx

Saturday night rolled around quicker than she imagined. She had made plans with Luke to come to his apartment and stay with him during the weekend because of her "seminar." She thought it would be nice to spend some one on one time with him so she arranged it according to his schedule.

She told Max and Rory she'd be home late on Sunday. Maybe Monday morning, depending what time everybody else in the class would be leaving. She packed an over night bag and headed to Luke's around 8:00 and ate late dinner with him upstairs followed by some other activities for the too of them…

xx

Breathless, he rolled off of Lorelai and she laughed at the feeling of lightness after he removed himself from hovering over her.

"I'm glad you decided to stay here this weekend." Luke said, kissing her on her arm.

"Me too." She smiled.

He worked his way up from her arm to her chest, kissing her in the places he knew she loved.

"You're staying here tomorrow night also?"

"That's the plan." She said laughing because he was tickling her slightly. He kissed along her neck, back up to her chin, and up to her lips.

He kissed her and went back to her neck for a few more minutes.

Ring, ring. Ring, ring.

Lorelai's heart stopped for a second because the noise just about scared her half to death. She grabbed her cell phone on the side of the bed, swatting at Luke to stop kissing her because she was probably going to laugh on the phone.

"Move!" She insisted, grabbing the phone and opening it up.

"Hello? Oh hey, how are you?" She swatted Luke one more time but he kept kissing her neck. "It's going great, thanks…no I'm actually going to bed soon…yeah…I know…you too…soon enough though…" she sat up in bed and leaned against the backboard. "I know…sure of course…thanks for calling…you too…bye."

She hung up the phone and looked down at Luke who was smiling like a fool. She had a seldom sort of look on her face, very serious and poised.

"That was Max."

Oops.


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