Adam walked up to the front door of Joan's house but couldn't bring himself to ring the bell.
He sat down on the porch to think.
Thoughts raced through his head faster than he could process them.
…How could I cheat on Jane like that?...
…She saw me at the bottom, helped me read my mom's note….
…She smashed my art, but then again, if she didn't I would have dropped out of school….
…How could I not believe her when she said she talks to God?...
…Was that really an angel I saw today?...
…What did she mean about Joan needing me?...
…Joan hates me, she doesn't need me….
…I'd probably just hurt her again….
…Why did I ever hook up with Bonnie in the first place?...
His thoughts continued like this for a long time until he realized the door was opening.
He stood up and looked to see who was coming out.
"What are you doing moping out here?" Grace asked.
"I came to talk to Jane," he said, adjusting his beanie.
"She's inside," Grace answered, pointing at the door.
"I know, but I can't talk to her," he replied, looking confused.
"Huh? Lemme get this straight, you came to talk to Joan, but not to talk to Joan?" Grace frowned and looked at him for an answer.
"I just got scared," was his reply after a long pause.
"I agree, she's a little wacko, but she's still stupid about you. Go talk to her," Grace said, starting to walk away.
"She is?" his faced brightened a bit as he turned to walk with her.
"Duh!" Grace said glancing at him.
"Not today, I just can't after all I did," was all he said.
"Understood," she said, falling into step with him as they headed down the sidewalk.
"What's that?" he asked as he pointed to the box.
"Luke gave it to me," she said, showing it to him.
"You really like him Grace?" Adam asked, thinking about Joan.
"Yeah," she finally said with a sigh.
"But I loved Jane, I still do, how could I screw things up like that?" he said, more to himself than to Grace.
"I don't know dude," she said without looking at him.
They walked along in silence until they got to Adam's shed.
Grace sat down on a stool across from Adam and watched him twist metal.
She could tell there was something he wasn't telling her.
For now she just sat with him, hoping he would be okay again.
