Muggle Life... Or Not?

By hedwigmail

A/N: Okay this Chapter is going to make a major change in the course of this story. My friend gave me this idea on a bus ride during a Field Trip. I was explaining this story and she says "Oh, how bout this..." Won't tell you though. Don't want to ruin this chapter. :0D Okay he looks like a pig... :oD that's better.

Last Time on Muggle Life... Or Not:

"So what's this year been like for you?" Draco asked calmly, flashing her a pearly grin.

"The usual. You know I think Ron likes me."

"No, really?" Draco's voice dripped with sarcasm. "Well he better not touch you. You got that? Your mine!" Draco laughed. He reached over and pulled Hermione to him.

"I don't know," Hermione said glumly, "How am I supposed to tell him to back off without lying to him or talking about you?"

"I don't know. Tell him you have a boyfriend back home or something. Just don't let him try anything, okay?"

Hermione didn't answer because they had finally reached the Malfoy Manor. Draco opened the door.

Hermione and Draco gasped.

Standing in the doorway was Lucius Malfoy.

Chapter 4: Not Everything Is What It Seems

Draco gave a sigh a relief "You almost gave me a heart attack, Dad!"

"Yeah Mr. Malfoy. You scared me!"

"I'm so sorry, I just wanted to greet you. How are you Hermione? And please, call me Dad." Flashing what was supposed to be a kind smile but as he wasn't used to this kind of stuff it ended up looking very evil.

Hermione trembled and slowly moved behind Draco, before saying, "Um, I think I'll stick with Mister Malfoy but thanks for the offer."

Lucius' grin slipped a notch. "Okay. Please, come in."

'His voice sounds different,' thought Draco. 'It's sweet. Almost too sweet. Oh it's probably just my imagination.'

Draco and Hermione followed Lucius into the Entrance Hall from where Hermione and Draco proceeded to walk down the long hallway past the portraits of Draco's ancestors, past the cozy little sitting room Hermione had been in when she was 12. On to a little tea room about another twenty feet down the hall.

Hermione entered the familiar room to find the now normal color scheme for the household.

The same pale faced woman that had greeted her; the first time she came to the mansion was sitting on an overstuffed black sofa. "Narcissa." It's so much easier to call someone you know that. Narcissa looked up and saw Hermione and her son Draco standing in the doorway.

"Oh your here. Sit down I'll get some tea."

Mean while in the next room over...

"Why did my son have to fall in love with a mudblood!" Lucius Malfoy's voice echoed through-out the room.

The room would have been completely dark if it was not for the torches that had been bolted to the walls. In the middle of the room was a cauldron, with steam slowly rising from it. Next to the cauldron was a table covered in an assortment of potion ingredients, like dead spiders, shrivel figs, and other disgusting things I'd rather not mention. In the mix of all of the ingredients there was a book entitled Most Potent Potions.

"Well she'll be gone soon. Muah-ha-ha. Muah-ha-ha . Muah-ha-ha. Muah-cough-cough."

Back in the Black, Silver and Green room...

"What was that?" Hermione questioned while sipping her tea.

"These walls are like paper. We must get them sound-proofed. Draco, honey go see what that was." Narcissa responded absentmindedly, before returning to her conversation with Hermione about her school year.

Draco carelessly got up and strolled down the hallway. Unbeknownst to him what his father was planning.

Back in the Dungeon-like room with Lucius...

"Merlin, I hate asthma," Lucius said in his normal cold-hearted voice.

"Well let's go over my plan! First I will brew this evil potion. Then I will give it to that mudblood as a drink. When she is done there will be no more of the mudblood Hermione! I am such a genius!"

Back to Draco who is conveniently standing outside of a particular dungeon...

Draco was carefully examining his fingernails. I need a new manicure. I'll have to get that scheduled.

Then he heard Hermione's name and gazed around the rock wall. It took a second for his eyes to adjust to the light but he soon saw his father standing over a steaming cauldron calling himself a genius.

"Dad?" Draco asked haphazardly, "What did you say?"

"Oh nothing." Lucius said flashing that strange smile.

"Okay. Um... what are you doing?"

"What? Oh, this stuff? It's um... uh... er... a head...ache potion? You know to heal headaches. I'm having a... uh... giant migraine."

"Oh... Okay catch you later Dad!"

Right after Draco left the room Lucius let out a sigh of relief. "That was close. Good thing I'm so amazing at coming up with excellent excuses and lies. Mostly lies, though."

A/N: So you guys. How cheesy was that? Oh well tell me how badly that sucked, I can take it!

Oh before the reason for the name "Urfs" and the urfs themselves I have to tell my wonderful readers and reviewers something. I just had my Birthday two days ago. (the 17th of December!) Yea aren't I special!

Okay now that that's over with, I have a new idea! For every chapter I'll come up with a new reason for the name Urf like for example this one could be:

United Readers Fart

Now onto the Urfs.

Uranus Reads "Freakizoids welcome":

Areida Rivers: Sorry, but I'm just trying to get you guys used to the idea and at the same Time get you through the first day. This chapter was mostly about the plot.

Dice123: I know you don't like this pairing and I probably wouldn't either if it weren't for the fact that the first random fanfic I read was Dramione, so sorry! Thanks for explaining that though, as I'm not Christian.

american-born-confused-desi: Thank you so much. That the nicest review I've ever gotten. You rock my socks.

alBBie: Thanks! I hope this chapter wasn't a let down then. I love your stories. Keep writing!

anniePADFOOT: Thanks so much for reading this one. See you online (email).

Bea (Whoever you are): :) I tried. Thanks for reviewing!

NotreDamegirlie: I know and I'm so sorry, but it fits the purpose of the book. I'll try to sort it out and explain everything later.

Happy Holidays! I only need one present from you to make my holiday since I have such a small wish list. Here it is:

Hedwigmail's Wish list:

1. Reviews

2. Nice Reviews

3. Mean Reviews

4. Any reviews!

5. R

6. E

7. V

8. I

9. E

10. W

11. S

12. !!!!!!

And that's all I really want. :o) I don't ask for much. Please! Consider both a birthday present and a holiday gift!