"It Came From Outer Space"
Act II
"More pumpkin treats, Beth, dear?" asked Binkie Muddlefoot.
"No thanks, Binkie, I've had my fill," said Beth. The plate of the strange hors d'oeuvres lingered in front of her for a second longer, and then Binkie moved on with her overly sweet creations. "Gag," said Beth to herself when she was sure Binkie was out of earshot.
"How you doin', sweetie? Havin' a good time?" said Herb, leaning over towards her.
"Great, Herb! These burgers are just... great!" she said, grinning. She meant it, of course- she just wasn't entirely sure of what else to say. The Muddlefoots were sweet people and all, and having them as next door neighbors was-- well, interesting-- but they weren't exactly civilized. Especially Tank. One morning Beth had woken up to find that Tank had gone through her trash, looking for something his mother had thrown out by accident. Beth had yelled at him, and then wondered aloud why he had gone through her trash and not his own. Tank hadn't bothered to answer her, just grunted and walked away.
Honker was the exception in the family. It was strange to think that such a brilliant kid could come from a family like this. But Beth understood. Her own home life had been very similar. While she'd actually been at home, in any case. Speaking of Honker--
"Say, Mr. Muddlefoot, where's Honker?" said Beth as Herb began to turn away.
"Oh, he's upstairs. He was gonna be eatin' with us, but he got a headache a little while ago and wanted ta go lie down."
"Oh, that's too bad. Well, I guess I'll see him tomorrow," said Beth, smiling politely. Inwardly, she wondered about that excuse-- it sounded quite a bit like Gosalyn's reason for not attending. She and Honker were best friends, and Gosalyn was quite adept at bending his will to get him to help her...
And meanwhile, up in Honker's room, Beth's suspicions proved right.
"But you've gotta help, Honk!"
"Gosalyn, I find it a little hard to believe that your father is an alien!" exclaimed Honker, pushing his glasses up.
"He's not an alien! But that thing down there pretending to be him IS!" said Gosalyn urgently.
"But, Gosalyn...," said Honker, his will beginning to falter a little.
"Honk, I need your help! You're the only one who'll believe me! The real Darkwing Duck is depending on you... Maybe the whole world is!"
This comment would have had a suitably ego-boosting effect on any other person, but for Honker, the idea was almost too much to bear. "But-- but-- Oh, Gosalyn, what can I do? If it already beat your dad--"
"Yeah, but it took him by surprise! We've got an edge so far, Honker! Come on! We'll think of something!" She glanced out the window to make sure the alien was still there and hadn't gone back to the house. Her heartbeat sped up when she saw it rise from the picnic table and start back towards the house.
Outdoors, Agrajag waved to his hosts as he walked next door. "Excuse me, I forgot something in the house, Herb," he said. "Back in a few!"
Gosalyn turned back to Honker. "Listen, I gotta get home before the alien finds out I'm here. Call me and we'll figure something out!" she said, and grabbed ahold of the pulley system she had devised from his window to hers.
At the door to the house, Agrajag's eyes widened. The child from earlier was hanging halfway out the window above! No more time could be wasted, he concluded. He entered the Mallard house and started up the stairs. As he moved, he transformed to a slimy, jelly-like substance and then assumed the form of Beth Webfoot. Reaching Gosalyn's door, she raised a fist and knocked.
"Gosalyn?" she called. Inside, Gosalyn had her trap all rigged. At the sound of Beth's voice, she paused and lowered the trip-cord. After a moment of thought, she let it go all the way and said, "Yeah?"
"Gosalyn, can I come in?" said Beth.
"Um... sure, I guess so," said Gosalyn, and let her in.
"What was that all about?" said Beth, glaring at her sternly.
"What?" she asked innocently.
"You know... that whole hanging-out-the-window thing. If Drake had seen you--"
"You mean he didn't?" asked Gosalyn.
"No, lucky for you. You can't imagine the trouble you'd be in if he had." Gosalyn, relieved, turned away from Beth and looked out of her window. Beth continued. "I can't believe you'd pull something like this, Gos! I mean, telling me that you're sick and all... that's just--"
"What?" said Gosalyn, freezing at the window.
"Lying to me like that, Gosalyn! That could get both of us in a lot of trouble!" The eyes! Why hadn't she looked at the eyes!
Gosalyn tried not to let anything show through her body language as she turned and walked towards the alien. Then, as quickly as she could, she grabbed her bow and arrow set, nocked a glue arrow, and let it fly at the alien. As usual, it was right on the mark. Agrajag's face tightened into a mask of fury.
"Why you little--" she cried, in Beth's voice but different tones.
"Take that, you alien scum!" said Gosalyn smugly.
Agrajag spread her arms and the glue stretched, entangling her more. Then she shimmered and her form lost its solidity, almost seeming to melt. The glue became a part of the giant mass of slime, absorbing into Agrajag's natural form. Then its body reformed, again as Beth, and she smiled coldly. "Now, Gosalyn," she said softly, "Come to Aunt Bethie..." She moved towards Gosalyn slowly, almost sluggishly, as though the glue were still affecting her.
"Hey, Gosalyn, what's going on up here?" said another voice. Beth walked into the room, and froze. "Oh, my God...This can't be possible!" Realization dawned on her. "Oh, no-- if you're... Then that means-- Oh, no..." she blurted, remembering what she'd done earlier to Darkwing.
"Shut up!" shouted Agrajag. She shoved her counterpart into the wall, and then cornered Gosalyn. "You're trapped, you little waif... There's no escape for you this ti-" She was cut off as Beth threw herself at her legs.
"Get out, Gos!" said Beth as she struggled with herself. "Boy, this is too weird...," she muttered under her breath.
"But-- But, I can't just leave you!" said Gosalyn, rooted to the spot.
"Yes, you can! Go! RUN! Get help," she cried, as the alien was able to slam her down to the ground, "get Launchpad!"
Gosalyn broke and ran, and didn't look back.
Agrajag hummed as she carried Beth, over her shoulder, to the "containment unit" in the front hall. She had been more affected by that glue bomb than she cared to let on, but refused to let that spoil her mood. "You earthlings are all such fools," she said as she tried to balance Beth on her shoulder and open the door at the same time. "Well, here we are." She stopped and looked at Darkwing, then smiled coldly. "Why, Darkwing Duck, are you trying to wriggle your way out of this little trap? Shame on you!" She set Beth down and put a foot firmly on her back, then bent and retied the knots holding Darkwing. He glared at her, and she blew a kiss at him. Then she picked Beth up, lifted her, and threw her down across Darkwing's stomach. "I know the two of you will have loads to talk about... Must dash, ta!" she said, slamming the door shut.
Beth squirmed, trying to comfort the pain in her back. In doing this, she accidentally elbowed Drake in his chest, and he groaned. She smiled guiltily. He glared at her, silently, trying to catch his breath.
Launchpad, true to his word, was at the tower that evening, working under the hood of the Thunderquack to keep his mind off of Beth. It was working pretty well, too. He paused and looked out a window. It was dark out already! Boy, time was going fast! He spoiled it by wondering suddenly what Beth was doing right now... He sighed. It was probably a good thing he wasn't around her, but he did miss the picnic. He'd been looking forward to it for several days. Suddenly he heard a noise behind him. A footstep. He turned to see Beth approaching him.
"Hi, Launchpad! What's up?" she said sweetly.
He couldn't help being happy to see her, even though he did feel a little odd around her. "Hi! Not much, I'm just givin' the ol' TQ a tune- up!" he said, trying to act casual. "So, what'cha doin' here? What about the party at the Muddlefoots'?"
"Oh, you know-- the Muddlefoots are real nice people and all, but... their party is still kind of dull," she said, still smiling at him. The smile was so unsubtle it was almost predatory, and it wasn't Beth's style at all. It made Launchpad a little nervous.
"Really? Ya think so? 'Cause I always thought that they give real neat parties! ... I mean, last year--before you knew them, y'know-- they gave a party with a 'Pelican's Island' theme," he said, starting to stutter a tad out of nerves. "See, Drake was Pelican, and Herb was Flipper... it was, y'know, it was... great."
"What were you?" she asked, moving a little closer to him and sitting on the edge of the plane. She crossed her legs slowly.
"M-me? Oh, well, I wasn't really anything. 'Cause it was really just, uh, well--"
She held a finger to her bill in a shushing manner. "It's okay, Launchpad," she said soothingly. Was it his imagination, or did she sound almost... seductive? "I'm not here for small talk. I know how you feel."
"Ya do? How? Uh... what feeling exactly are you talking about?"
She didn't answer, just looked at him.
"What?" he asked, genuinely confused. She kept looking at him patiently, waiting for him to catch on, but he remained lost. "What? No, really, what?" She sighed, and poked him in the chest and then pointed at herself. "Oh," he said, and started to work under the hood of the Thunderquack again.
She laughed a little. "Launchpad-- Launchpad, it's okay! Come out of there, I want to talk to you! Come on...," she said, pulling him out by his scarf. "Listen, it's okay... I... I feel the same way."
He couldn't speak for a moment. "You- you do?" he managed to say softly.
She nodded. "I always have. That whole thing with Drake was just to get you jealous so that you'd make the first move... but today I finally saw that it's not going to work that way. I thought I'd better do it myself, or else we might never get together." She smiled again, more tenderly than the first time, and said, "I... love you, Launchpad."
Launchpad found that he couldn't answer at all. She- loved him? Wow! He'd never even guessed! Was he supposed to say something now? From the way she was watching him, he figured that he was. "Ah... gee, Beth... I- I don't know what to..."
"Shhhh. Don't say anything... Just be quiet and kiss me," she whispered.
He was sort of taken aback by this forwardness on her part, since it wasn't something he'd expect from her. Meanwhile, he suddenly shut down completely about what to do. Sure, he'd dreamed about kissing Beth, but at the moment Launchpad was far too nervous to really go through with it. There was still something slightly intimidating about her just now, that he hadn't accounted for. In the end, it was his hesitation that saved him. ALMOST.
After several moments of stuttering, sweating, and deliberating, he looked down at her face- lips puckered, eyes shut, awaiting the moment. That was it- he couldn't disappoint her. 'Well, here goes nothing,' he thought to himself. He whispered, "I love you, too, Beth," and leaned towards her.
"No, Launchpad! DON'T TOUCH IT!" cried Gosalyn, making her delayed entrance, with Honker hot on her tail.
"Huh? Don't touch what?" he said, and jumped back from Beth, startled.
Beth scowled violently, in a manner that was most unlike her in every way. "You little brat! You're too late!" she cried to Gosalyn, and grabbed Launchpad by the bill. This was extremely uncomfortable for him, and Agrajag knew it. Psychological games were usually her favorite modes of defeating a victim, but if she was thwarted in those she was just as happy to cause the victims physical pain. Having made contact with Launchpad, she brutally shoved him aside and assumed his form.
"Beth?" he said, sitting on the floor, stunned.
Agrajag turned to him and leered at him cruelly. "You're just plain PITIFUL," Launchpad heard himself say, although the tone of voice was one he would never have thought he'd possessed. Not knowing what to think, he sat on the floor motionless.
"Come ON, Launchpad! We've got to get out of here!" cried Gosalyn, running to him and grabbing his hand.
"Gosalyn-- I don't believe this! You were right!" said Honker.
"DUH!" exclaimed Gosalyn, rolling her eyes as she tried to think of a way of getting past the alien. "Okay-- Honk, you go to the left! Launchpad, you take the right, and I'll go straight down the middle!" she said. All three of them split up at once, and, just as she'd wanted, the alien didn't think to stop her as she dove straight at it.
Instead he went for Honker.
Catching him by his bookbag, Agrajag grinned and said, "So, I hear you're a genuis, Honk-man! You guys tend t'be pretty level-headed when the crunch comes in. I can use that."
"Honker!" said Launchpad, screeching to halt. The poor kid looked terrified. Without even a moment's thought, Launchpad decided to go back and rescue him. After all, what could the alien do to him? Look like him? Fighting himself would be an interesting situation.
Still holding Honker, the alien turned around and went in Launchpad's direction. "Guess what, LP?" he said as he slowly walked forward. Launchpad gulped, but kept a tough expression on his face as he rolled up his sleeves. Agrajag changed form, resembling Beth now. "She never loved you. She doesn't even know." He was hurt for a moment, but then the hurt just strengthened his resolve.
Gosalyn, seeing the peril her friends were in, stopped short. "Launchpad! Don't try to fight it! Just RUN!" she cried.
Launchpad shook his head, a determined look in his eye. "No, Gos- - this is somethin' I gotta do," he said. The alien had made him mad. There was no way he was backing down now. This was for DW, and Beth, and Honker. Anyone who saw Launchpad McQuack at this moment would never think of him as just a sidekick. There was no doubt that he was every bit a hero in his own right.
Agrajag stopped walking and put Honker down in the front passenger of the Thunderquack, and tied seatbelts all around him. His form changed back to Launchpad as he looked at him with no trace of emotion on his face, except for a cool sort of superiority.
"Well!" said Launchpad. "What are you waitin' for?"
Agrajag shrugged, rolled his eyes, and switched into his natural form. In a second, the slime monster enveloped Launchpad and smothered his scream. In the seat of the Thunderquack, Honker was feeling very queasy and frightened, but was forcing himself to pay attention.
"NO!" yelled Gosalyn. Too many friends were gone. She more alone than she'd ever been. Gosalyn made up her mind right then not to let the alien get away with this. This alien was going down. As she finished her scream, it looked up at her.
"You are still here?" it said in a frightening combination of Darkwing, Beth, and Launchpad's voices. "By my understanding, any earthling with common sense would have realized the futility of the situation and have fled by now. If you are truly so foolish as to remain here, however, I will not stop you. A personality like yours- with so much, as your father calls it, 'spirit'- can always come in handy in overthrowing the world."
Realizing that she didn't have anything even remotely resembling a plan, Gosalyn revised her outline for attack and pledged to return later. For the moment, she made her escape. Agrajag watched her go. It was still working the glue out of its system, and if it had tried to catch the child it would probably have exhausted itself. It was a hunter; it knew its limits. The two males had made their capture quite easy, by simply standing still or even running towards it.
Turning back to the unconscious Terran lying at its feet, Agrajag shifted forms again, to the strongest physical Terran form available. He bent and picked his prototype up from the ground, and stuck him in the backseat of the Thunderquack. This form came in more handy than he'd expected, he realized, as it included the knowledge of how to operate a Terran flight vehicle. This would allow him to blend into Terran surroundings until his superiors arrived on Earth. Agrajag considered his future- it was looking pretty good. At the rate he was going, he'd be in line for a promotion in just a little while... He was humming to himself as he started up the engine.
"Wh-where are we going?" asked Honker timidly.
Agrajag looked at the boy in surprise, apparently not expecting him to talk. "Oh-- I thought you were asleep or somethin'. Oh, well. At the moment, little Honkster, you an' our big dumb buddy here are takin' a trip to the containment unit where I'm keepin' the others. Then I'm gonna look around a little more for Gos, to make sure she doesn't get help from anyone an' stuff. If she doesn't show by morning, I'll forget about lettin' ya all die together, and just get you guys outta the way." He grinned at Honker coldly.
"Well- what if you don't find Gosalyn?"
"We can do just fine without her," said Agrajag, temporarily shifting to Beth. "After all, her intellect certainly isn't necessary to us. And," she added, becoming Drake, "I don't need anyone but myself." He switched back to Launchpad in a hurry, in order to get the plane out of the nosedive it had fallen into.
"Stupid Terrans... Why can't they all do the same things! To fly a plane, I gotta be him. To speak straight, I gotta be her. What a crock," he muttered under his breath. Honker noted this silently.
Darkwing had tried his best to communicate to Beth, without being cruel, that she needed to roll off of his stomach. She hadn't taken any of the hints he'd dropped (which mostly consisted of looking at her and nodding his head in a jerky motion- she'd thought he was having a seizure and panicked), so finally he'd rolled over, and knocked her off of himself. Then he'd set about his activity from before, straining at his bonds. He'd noticed that, unfortunately, Beth's glasses had fallen off of her face when she'd been pretty much flipped over. He hoped he'd remember to apologize when he got them both out of there.
He hadn't even made it halfway this time before the alien came back, and unceremoniously dumped both Launchpad and Honker in the closet. Darkwing noticed with what was almost amusement that Launchpad's still-unconscious head was resting against Beth's chest. Wouldn't he be happy when he woke up, Darkwing thought, although Beth looked fitfully embarrassed. Darkwing noted these things mostly to take his mind off of the fact that both Launchpad's legs and most of Honker's body were pinning his arms to his chest, making it impossible for him to get out of the vacuum cord. He'd failed Gosalyn, his own daughter. What good was he?
Gosalyn spent a while arguing with herself as to whether it was worth it to go home and get her arrows to defend herself; after all, the glue arrow had slowed it down before. But if the alien was at the house, she'd REALLY be in trouble. Finally, she gave a mental shrug. It had been awhile since she'd run away from the tower; if the alien had checked the house for her first, there was a decent chance it wouldn't be there now. The house was dark as she let herself in through the back door, and her heart pounded every time a floorboard creaked.
She successfully made it to her room, grabbed her quiver of arrows, and was on her way back out when she heard a noise from the hall closet. She nearly had a heart attack, but once she caught her breath, she thought, 'What am I so scared of? I'm the QUIVERWING QUACK! Beating up villains is my JOB!' With that, she nocked another glue arrow and advanced on the door. She hit a snag when she realized that she couldn't open the door while she was aiming. Briefly, she considered running away, but the noise came again, and it occured to her that she could catch the alien by surprise. She took a deep breath and quietly turned the doorknob, then got her arrow into position and pried the door open with her foot. The arrow nearly fell from its position when she saw the group huddling in the enclosed space.
"Guys?" asked Gosalyn, hardly daring to hope. At first she thought maybe it was a trap laid out by the alien, but then she remembered that it was unable to duplicate more than one person at a time. "Guys! I found you!" she yelled, and she set about untying them amidst their muffled yells of excitement.
"Gosalyn! Thank God! Wow, how'd you do it?" asked Beth, as put her glasses back on, then stood up and stretched her legs. Interestingly enough, however, she kept her arms crossed across her chest almost from the moment she was freed, and occasionally looked at Launchpad and blushed. Launchpad did much the same thing.
"Um... Oh, you know, instinct, I guess," she replied.
"It was an accident, huh?" asked Darkwing teasingly.
"Hey, hey, hey... just cause I didn't mean to do it doesn't mean I didn't do it, right?" asked Gosalyn.
"That's my daughter," said Darkwing, giving her a warm hug.
"Way to go, Gos," said Launchpad. "Looks like we were worried about ya for nothin'!" He ruffled her hair. She squirmed and ducked her head, grinning.
"Dad... I always knew the alien wasn't really you," she said.
Beth looked guilty. "Oh, heh heh, about that... Um, I'm really really sorry, Drake... it was an honest mistake, right?" She looked at him with the most innocent face she could muster. It wouldn't have had any effect on Darkwing except that he suddenly remembered what the alien had told him: Beth was in love with him. Even if he didn't WANT her to be, she was, and she'd had an awfully rough time with him so far. Maybe... just this once, he owed her an apology.
"Well, heck, it could have happened to anyone. No hard feelings," he said, offering her his hand. Beaming, she took it and they shook firmly.
"Uh, say, DW, shouldn't we try to do something about the monster?" asked Launchpad. There was an anxious quality to his voice that didn't seem to have anything to do with the alien. His attention was firmly riveted on Beth. That was when it dawned on Darkwing that maybe Launchpad had more than just a crush on Beth. She remained oblivious, clutching Darkwing's hand as if it were her lifeline. He sighed. This made things a bit more difficult to handle.
"Well, guys, unless you know more than Agrajag told me in its personal life history that every villain seems to feel obliged to tell me," said Darkwing, gently removing his hand from Beth's, "you'd better listen for a few moments while I tell you what I know."
After Darkwing's recap of what he'd been told, everyone began to speak at once about what to do. "We could lure the alien into a trap baited with butter and roses!" said Launchpad.
"Well, I...," said Honker, who was drowned out by Gosalyn.
"Butter and roses! What the heck are you talking about? We'd have to use brains for the bait-- there's nothing aliens like more than that!"
"But Gosalyn, I--" said Honker, and was cut off by Launchpad this time.
"Eeeeeeewww! Brains? Whose brains would you-- oh, no!" he said, keeping a firm hand on his flight cap.
"No, no, no! I meant that we'd get something that looked like brains!" said Gosalyn.
"But, but I--" said Honker, too quietly to be heard.
"Listen, this is something that we really need to think through," said Beth, who had just recently learned how to make herself heard. Honker sighed inwardly and wished she'd give him some tips.
"The alien thinks that it's much smarter than us. It would see through those kinds of ploys in a flash. We have to think of something better. If we only knew if it had a weakness..." she mused, cupping her chin in her hand and thinking.
"Hey, Honker's smart! Maybe the two of you can think of something together!" said Gosalyn enthusiastically.
"Right! Any ideas, Honker?" said Darkwing. Everyone turned to Honker, and with all eyes on him he found it impossible to speak straight.
"Um... um... I... um...," he stuttered. The others watched him anxiously for a moment and then rolled their eyes and started to turn away. "Wait!" he shouted, startling them. "I was thinking... Well, I mean, I watched the alien when it changed its shape a few times and I think I've determined the stages that it has to go through. It's not made of normal flesh, it's made up of some sort of slime- almost like a gel!"
"Yeah, we know," said Darkwing.
"Wait, I think he's leading up to something," said Beth. "Go on, Honk."
"Anyway, even though it spends most of its time in earthling forms, it can only do the things that a certain person is good at when it assumes that form... and to do that, it has to-"
"To switch to its transient state! I gotcha! We can catch it that way!" exclaimed Beth. "NOW, all we have to do is think of a WAY to catch it that way..."
"Hey!" said Gosalyn, and held up her glue arrow. "Earlier, I shot it with a glue bomb, but it got out by switching into the Cool Mint Gel body and sucking the glue into itself. Afterwards, though, it was moving kinda slow for awhile!"
Beth snapped her fingers. "I remember! It was going slowly, when I was fighting it! I didn't know you'd hit it with glue, though. Hmm... Hmmm! Hey, guys, are you thinking what I'm thinking?" she said, with a grin in Honker's direction.
"Um, I think so, Beth," said Launchpad, "but what if the alien doesn't fit in any jello molds?" Silence. Beth blinked. Launchpad blushed and said, "Ah, never mind."
"Well," said Honker, "I think what Beth was thinking was that we could hit Agrajag with a much higher-potency glue solvent to slow it down more effectively."
"Close, Honker! I was thinking, actually, that we should see if we can't freeze it completely- just sort of chemically cement it or something. The absorption of the glue really implies that it takes everything that touches it through itself- that chemical that it told you it secretes, Drake, maybe it really operates by absorbing the secretions of OTHER lifeforms, or something, I don't know. I'd need time to do much more than theorize. But if we could come up with a powerful enough glue solvent--" She turned to look at Honker, who was already flipping through a textbook he'd pulled out of his bookbag. Beth went and read over his shoulder. "This should work. This should work well enough to pretty much FREEZE it!"
"Keen gear!" said Gosalyn, contemplating the possibilities of giving frozen alien popsicles to Tank. "Heh heh heh... he'd probably eat 'em, too...," she said to herself with an evil chuckle.
"Great! So, Beth, you and Honker can team up and fix up this formula while Launchpad and I try to pinpoint the location of the alien," said Darkwing.
"What do I get to do?" asked Gosalyn.
"Oh, you can come with us...," said Darkwing.
"Woo-hooo!" shouted Gosalyn, leaping up into the air.
"...As bait," he finished.
"D'oh!" said Gosalyn.
