Chapter 2 - Strategy Session

Smoker sneered. "It's a party where the women have more jewelry than common sense and the men have no chins. They pose danger?"

"This is more than a party, sir." She held up the invitation and regarded it like she would a particularly disgusting but dangerous bug. "This is a cotillion."

"I was wondering how you said that." A line of smoke streamed out of the corner of his mouth. "It's a fancy name for torture. What's your point?"

A flicker of fear passed behind Tashigi's eyes; not fear for herself but for her superior. "It's a coming out party."

Smoker paused then asked, "They have parties for that?"

"It's the easiest way to find matches," she said.

Smoker frowned. He had wondered what Brandnew meant by sending his 'regards' to Lord Fop. "What people do on their personal time is their business, but they shouldn't go around flaunting it, and I sure as heck shouldn't have to be there to witness it."

"'Coming out' in the sense that they are eligible for marriage, sir," Tashigi explained patiently.

"Oh. Well good for them." He stubbed out his cigar and reached for another one. He had just struck a match when something occurred to him. Tashigi watched as his normally stoic expression changed to barely concealed horror. "You don't mean."

"It's a meat market, sir."

Tashigi described the lives of debutantes. There were countless hours taking lessons from etiquette instructors and ballroom dance teachers, perfecting glamour and style and insipidity, but those were just the outer trappings. The gossiping and fan-tapping and giggling hid minds like steel traps that were devoted to one purpose alone - attaining a husband with money or connections. Once ensnared in the charms of a debutante, it was only a matter of time before a man found himself walking down the aisle about to marry a young lady with too many middle names and a closet with four hundred pairs of shoes.

As Tashigi spoke, she realized that all the blood was draining from Smoker's face. When she was finished, the stub of his cigar was dangling out of the corner of his wide-open mouth.

Smoker didn't know what to do! He always knew what to do! She was on the verge of panicking when her boss suddenly growled, "If this is a joke, Tashigi."

Whatever moment of crisis he had was passed. "No joke, sir," she said.

He crossed his arms over his chest. "You read the letter from Headquarters. There's no way around it."

"But you can go into it prepared, sir. If I may?" She didn't wait for permission and took up a pen and paper from his desk. She began to scribble notes furiously. "We'll need to make arrangements for your clothing and transportation. We need find out what the menu is and who the other guests are as well and.."

She looked up to see Smoker raising an eyebrow. She felt she should explain. "My mother had Firm Views, sir."

Those Views involved what a girl should and should not do -and a girl should definitely not waste her time at swordplay when there was a world of rich men waiting to be entrapped by feminine wiles. Tashigi had spent a better part of her youth hiding from her ballroom dance instructors and her etiquette teacher.

Strangely enough her mother wondered why Tashigi never came home on leave.

While his subordinate wrote, Smoker considered what he would do to Brandnew the next time they met. Hot pokers would be a good place to start. "Pencil in something for yourself, Tashigi - unless you happened to pack a dress with all those swords."

It was Tashigi's turn to pale. "But, sir - "

"It says 'Captain Smoker and a guest,'" he said pointedly.

Tashigi grasped for an excuse. "But there needs to be someone on the ship - "

"That's an order." Smoker wasn't looking forward to it anymore than she was.

Tashigi let the idea roll around in her head for a moment. "Tactically it's not such a bad idea, is it sir? My appearance will keep them away for awhile. Since they judge people by the size of their bank accounts, once they realize that you don't have any money to speak of, there won't be a problem. What do you think, sir? Sir?"

He wasn't looking at her and Tashigi got prickles on her neck. Of course. Smoker was a captain so he'd be getting an ample paycheck. Room and board was covered since he was living on the ship. The only thing she ever saw him buy were cigars and his three-wheeler that he doted on.

"A guy's got to retire on something," he said.

Tashigi blanched. An officer with pots of money who spent all of his time on long sea voyages away; what society girl on the hunt wouldn't love that?

Captain Smoker was Grade A prime rib about to be lowered into a shark tank.

A Marine called through the door. "If the weather stays fair, we'll be arriving in port in six hours, sir."

Smoker stood up. "Get some coffee, Tashigi. We have a long night ahead of us."