Chapter 12: The Abby will fall

The loud sound of the bang sent Abby flying from where she had been sleeping. She ended up huddled now in the corner of the room near the closet, her arms covering her head as if that was going to keep the evil away. Her body trembled uncontrollably as she fought to stay in control. Control that was hanging by nothing more than a thin well frayed thread.

The walls of the room were closing in on her. Her heart began to beat faster in her chest and she could feel the sweat forming now upon her face, her hands, and she could have sworn she felt the color leave her cheeks. An empty shell of a woman was what was left huddled there in the corner.

Her stomach started to turn violently on her and she clawed her way to the bathroom. She leaned her head over and started to empty her stomach, nothing but air was the result of her body's reaction to the fear. She sat there coughing and gagging, trying to get the horribly feelings to come to an end but they were more than what she could physically and mentally handle alone.

After he had regained his focus Carter headed down the hallway seeing that the bed where he had left her was empty and he could hear her in the bathroom. He walked carefully and slowly inside kneeling down next to her, holding onto her as he tried to comfort her during what he thought was a time of need.

Abby had nothing left to fight with, all that she had, had been sucked out of her. She laid there in his arm, drained.

Carter picked her up when her body ceased it's retaliation, returning her to the bed from which she had so hastily fled from. And with the way that Abby looked right now, it just nailed home what Susan had been trying to tell him just moments ago that she needed more help that what he could give her. Something had to give, she needed to see what was happening to her, surely even as her world was unraveling around her, Abby was aware of what was going on with herself.

Fear was an emotion that was strong and it could turn things around. Twist events so that you never remembered them exactly the same way twice. Bits and pieces of them would be missing and just when you thought it couldn't get any worse you would remember one more tiny detail. It had the power to make you feel what you didn't want to feel. Fear itself had the power to haunt you until you needed to find a way to escape it. It had the power to make you want to take the only way out. The one way out that you never dreamed you would take. The one way that took more courage than anything else, but you knew deep inside your very being that it was the only way to end the fear that had taken a hold of you, taken a hold of your life.

It was that point that Abby was at. She had reached the end of her rope. She didn't want to live like this, to be a prisoner inside of her own mind. That was how she felt right now. Compliant to the emotions that were flooding her body, feeling every thing as if it was happening for the first time over and over again. Every nerve in her body was shot, over stimulated making it feel that much more raw. She could no longer use closing her eyes to block out the pain, for it was when she closed her eyes that it was the most vivid. She couldn't get her exhausted mind to turn off, even for a moment to give her any sort of relieve, a momentary escape from reality. It was here and now that her mind had been made it, that she was going to have to make her mind's reality that which she wanted and needed it to be.

Insanity was it something that people wished for when it got so bad that you couldn't bare to face reality anymore. Was it a cheap cop out from having to face that which you didn't have the strength or the will power inside you for? Perhaps it was a built in defense mechanism of the mind for those who had experience something that they just could not mentally or physically cope with.

"Abby are you okay?"

She could hear the distance voice, yet her mind had let go and that voice didn't register with her anymore. She was locked now in a place where no one could harm her. A place where there was nothing evil, no fear. She had gone within the deepest parts of herself to escape. Abby's mind had taken her to a place where fear no longer existed, where the reality was that which she wanted it to be, silent and calming. She didn't have to wish to close her eyes to escape for even with her eyes open she had nothing to fear.

It might have been that she had gone so silent or even the blank look that covered her face, perhaps it was the hint of the small smile that was formed on the corner of her lips that sent shivers up Carter's spine as he looked at her. There was something different about her now, it had happened almost in an instant. She had gone from being scared of anything and everything to the most calm and relaxed person he had seen in days.

"Abby," Carter shook her shoulder, "Abby."

Yet there was no response from her. Her facial expression didn't change, she didn't blink, she didn't move. Carter clapped his hands in a futile effort to get some response out of Abby, yet there was nothing. And he began for the first time now to feel that fear. "Abby come on baby." He needed something, a sign from her that she was there. But she seemed unwilling to give him even the slightest hint, it appeared for all intense purposes that the lights were on but no one was at home.

"Susan!" Carter screamed not as he ran to the doorway.

Susan about died when she heard Carter's voice, the chill that was in it. You could from his tone alone know that something was desperately wrong. Her heart about stopped when she saw the look on his face as he stood in the doorway frantic for her to answer him. She ran towards him, "what Carter, oh god what?"

"Abby." He said pulling her now over to where he had left her as they both stood now next to the bed.

"Abby?" Susan said moving closer to her, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Abby? Abby come on snap out of it?"

There was nothing from Abby. She just sat there on the bed; the blank stare that had fallen across her face remained. Where she had gone, no one would know and she didn't want to be reached to be pulled from this place where she had now found comfort and solitude. There were no Paul's in this place, no stabbing, and no hurt. Why would anyone want to leave a place like this? It was a heaven on earth that once you found, you made yourself at home. The voices of the outside world faded from her ears, she was alone and that's the way she wanted to stay.

"Abby!" Susan shouted even louder now. "Carter what happened?"

"I found her in the bathroom throwing up, I brought her back in here and she just went silent." Carter said, "she hasn't said anything, she doesn't look at you and when she does it's like she's looking through you." He sat in front of Abby now desperate to catch her attention. "Abby baby I love you."

He hoped that would at least get a small smile from her, but it was as if she hadn't heard him, as if those words meant nothing to her anymore. The lack of reaction, of response broke his heart.

Susan was getting more worried by the second, she thought for sure that hearing Carter say that would illicit some form of response from her but yet there was nothing. Silence had filled the room, neither of them wanting to give up, or admit to the fact that while she might have been sitting there in the room with them she was no longer actually there. "Carter we need to take her to County." Susan finally managed to say breaking the silence.

Carter wanted to just take her into his arms and hold her until she said something to him but when he reached out and touched her hand there was nothing there, her eyes didn't move, she didn't move. A tear rolled down his cheek landing on her hand. She didn't even blink to see him hurting like that. "You're right." He said softly as he moved to pick her up from the bed and carry her out.

Where they thought that they were going to have to do this, fight her tooth and nail every step of the way, there was nothing. Susan grabbed the keys for Carter and opened the door. This wasn't right and they shouldn't have to be doing this. There was one person that both Carter and Susan could hold responsible for doing this to her. And yet he was about to become a man who lived his life in hospital but yet had full control of his mind, his victim however no longer had control of hers, she had lost touch with everything that at one time she had held dear.

Yet it wasn't just Abby now that was hurting from all of this, for the one thing that Paul had wanted above all else was to take something dear away from Carter. So that he could feel the pain that he had suffered all these years and that was to lose something. To be able to be near it but no longer have it with him. Carter could see Abby, he could touch Abby but he was no longer able to be with Abby. Right now it appeared that Paul had gotten his wish, Carter had lost Abby.