Chapter 1 : Details.
The sound of laughter came from the downstairs pub. All of the inn's guests seemed to be there, partying. All except for two.
After that elf attacked them in the afternoon, it was decided it would be best to have someone on guard. Lidia had told them she'd have a walk before her shift, so she was probably stealing someone's wallet out there. Chaos and Iris said it was too early to bed, and went downstairs for information, drinks and some fun.
So Loki was left alone with her. Not that he'd be a great company, though, he hardly spoke to anyone. There he was, sitting by the window and scrutinizing the outside world with his cold green eyes. The first shift was his, and the next would be hers.
She tried to get some sleep but her mind wouldn't rest so she decided to sit on her bed and stay there until she had to take the place by the window. Most inns either had no vacant rooms, or charged too much for those. They eventually found a non-expensive place they could spend the night in, a single room with five beds. Good enough.
Fenris sighed. Geffen was indeed beautiful, with all those lights and magic and people walking on the streets though it was already late. That was supposed to be expected, she guessed, since they were making the last arrangements for the festival that would begin the next day.
She strained her ears, and could easily tell Iris's laughter from the others', it was… more musical, angelic. Chaos would be by Iris's side, they'd be laughing together at some joke or at some happy memory, and they'd blush whenever someone mentioned the cute couple they were. And indeed they looked good together.
But even though she knew they'd make each other happy and help each other get over their losses and bad memories, she wished they wouldn't. And she knew it was unfair and selfish.
She ran her fingers through her loose, long raven hair, trying to put such thoughts aside. It'd be cruel of her to separate her dear Chaos from the one he really loved in this life. No matter what feelings she had had for him during the past thousand years, maybe even Eternity.
Fenris felt eyes on her, but as she raised her violet ones she saw Loki was looking to the other side. Still guarding them silently.
"I am going downstairs," she said apparently to no one in particular.
Loki nodded, gazing at a faraway place. She stood and walked to the wooden door, brushing away any dirt that could have settled on her clothes. Taking a deep breath, Fenris walked downstairs.
She had already decided she would resign the Balder inside Chaos. She had already decided it would be best to let him do as he wished; he was only the reincarnation of someone she had loved in her previous life.
She knew all that, but it still hurt. To have a dagger stab her heart would have been less painful than seeing Iris and Chaos together.
Fenris watched from the stairs. She wanted to go there and eat or drink something, maybe even have some fun and forget the constant pain that assaulted her. But she couldn't.
They hadn't seen her, or at least they acted as such. They were fighting playfully over something, and then Chaos whispered something in Iris's ear and she burst out laughing. She gave him a playful punch in the shoulder and he, too, chuckled before they resumed their talking.
And Fenris witnessed his hand accidentally brushing against Iris's, and the young lady's face blushing as she smiled at him. Fenris saw it when he smiled back at her.
And she rushed back to the room, doing her best to keep her tears from falling. In vain. She had, it was true, already given up on him. But she wasn't ready, not yet.
Fenris stopped in front of the room's door, trying very hard to stop the tears and sobs. She had a goddess's soul, she had to be strong. But she was also a female in love, and lacked strength when it came to Balder.
She went inside the room, Loki apparently hadn't moved. He didn't turn to face her, and she stood there, waiting for something she didn't know what it was. Moments passed before she heard his voice. And Fenris thought his voice wasn't as hard and cold as it usually was, but it could have been her imagination.
"Are you sure it's worth tears?" Loki asked. But it didn't sound like a question, it was more like… he was trying to comfort her in some way.
She didn't answer, but went straight to her bed. Now he had asked her, was it worth it? Was a love of a past life really worth such suffering?
She felt like some weight had been lifted from her chest. Fenris closed her eyes, and sleep took over her. She had a dream of airships and wyverns, and saw herself fall into a dark abyss. But she was saved. Loki held her hand when no one else had seen her falling.
Her conscience came back slowly. He had saved her twice in the same day, both from death and despair.
And she had forgotten it.
"Loki…" she whispered. He turned his head to her. "… thank you."
And with that, Fenris fell asleep. But Loki's eyes didn't leave her. He waited until her breathing became calm and subtle enough to indicate she really was sleeping before he silently walked to her. He studied her face for a few seconds and brushed her hair away from it.
Loki threw his blanket over her and walked back to his spot by the window. He'd let her rest, he'd keep guarding her until it was someone else's shift. And he had no idea why.
"You're welcome," he said, and his green eyes then turned to the outside world.
