Disclaim: I don't own any of the o.c. characters.

So yea um…I guess when I first started to write this I was like blah but now I am actually getting into reading it I think because I am putting my own experiences into summer's life.

Thoughts

SUMMERS POV

I woke up to the sound of machines beeping, I looked around and there were doctors at then end of my bed looking at me.

"Miss. Roberts your awake, do you know where you are?" the doctor asked

"Um am I dead? Probably not right um looking around a hospital"

"Great you are well aware of your surroundings, you almost died but a young man found you in your bathroom at your house an called the ambulance, your very lucky to be alive."

"I was trying to die, and who found me so I can like kick there ass!"

Just then the lovely father dearest walked in

"Summer darling your fine, I thought I lost you" said Neil walking towards me looking very sad and happy

the doctors decided that they needed to talk to my father about what had happened to me, I was resting my eyes when there was a very silent hey, I looked up hoping it was going to be Cohen.

"Hey Ryan, I guess you're the one who found me?"

"Yea I went to ask you for the chem."

WHAT RYAN SAW

RYANS POV SUMMERS HOUSE

I walked into her room knowing she wouldn't hear my knock, because of her music I didn't see her anywhere I decided to knock on the door for the restroom,

I saw red coming out from under the door my first instinct kick in an I opened it only to see Summer laying on the floor arms cut and bleeding everywhere I immediately tried to wake her up,

"SUMMER, CAN YOU HEAR ME COME ON SUMMER SAY SOMETHING"

I grabbed my cell and dialed 911, they said they would be right over, I started to panic I didn't know what to do, I opened my cell and called Kirsten.

"Hello this is Kirsten Cohen how can I help you today?"

"Kirsten its Ryan I went to summers to get the chem. Notes and she was just laying here I don'tknowwhattodoimeanisshegoingtodietheaumbulanceisonthewayiamscared" I was talking to fast I don't think she understood until

"Ryan calm down the ambulance is on the way and I will go down to the hospital right now just don't panic" and with that she hung up

"ANYONE UP HERE?" men voices came from downstairs

"WERE UP HERE!" the paramedics came with the stretcher

They immediately took her I was allowed to ride with her, she looked dead she was so white, boney.

"So why didn't you just leave me there?" said Summer

"I couldn't I love you too much to leave you there" said Ryan

"you… love me?" she looked at me with teary eyes

"Yea I do you're a great friend I don't want to loose you"

"I love you to Ryan" said Summer

But she did not know that the little curly hair Jewish boy was standing by the door right when she said I love you to Ryan.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door, Seth Cohen walked in Ryan excused himself from the room not before he gave Summer a hug goodbye, Seth felt angry all he wanted to do was punch him, this is his "summer" not Ryan's he has Marissa. Ryan left and now it was just Seth and Summer.

"You know you can come closer I am not going to bite" said Summer

Seth walked closer to her and sat on the chair that Ryan and just vacated

"I know this is a bad time to ask this but why did you want to die?" Seth looked at her with his puppy dog eyes

"I thought no one cared for me, I mean Ryan was going to get with Marissa and You and jess, and all I had was princess sparkles" said Summer

"Summer you will ALWAYS have me no matter who I am with or where I am your Summer you're my EVERYTHING, without you there's no reason for me to be here on this planet, without you I wouldn't be the Seth Cohen I am today"

"Why do you always make me feel so happy when all I want to do usually when I see you is run an hide, Seth I thought you wouldn't care for me anymore because you were with jess"

"Summer didn't I care about you when I was with Anna, I did and I mean Anna broke up with me cause of you she knew that all I wanted was to be with you no one else"

"Then why are you with jess?" she said in a very little voice I could barely hear

"Because you said you only wanted to be friends, and I know you're moving on too right?"

"Cohen I said I wanted to be friends with you cause, I was scared I was going to get hurt again but without you I am hurting even more"

"Summer as much as I would love to be with you I just cant, I will always be here for you I want you to get help stop cutting because it leads to nothing"

"Are we still friend? I mean you know even after all this?"

"You're always going to be my friend Summer, even if you don't know it" Seth looked at Summer knowing he should have seen the signs.

"Your not going to cry on me are you Cohen?"

"No, but I want you to promise me something" Seth turned and looked at her straight in the eyes

"What is it?"

"To stop cutting to get help, and whenever you feel you need to cut, call me day or night I don't care I will be right over to your house, and we will say up all night playing jenga" Seth cell went off the tune of "Barbie girl"

"um Seth I think your pants are ringing"

"oh yea hold on"

Seth walk away obviously embarrassed, Summer knew that ring tone belonged to BITCH Jess.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

2 weeks later

Summer was back from "HER CAMP AWAY" everyone was waiting there as she got off the airport plane

Summer stepped off the plane she saw her dad the Coopers and the Cohen's

Summer ran straight towards Seth and Jumped in his arms she seemed so much happier than she was when she left

"I DON'T WANT TO GO DAD DON'T MAKE ME GO I WILL STOP ON MY OWN I PROMISE DON'T MAKE ME GO!"

the two men from the "CAMP AWAY" grabbed Summer and took her on the plane she was crying and screaming she was never going to forgive them ever.

Summer and Seth hugged Forever everyone was just around them looking and being in awe the whole time

Seth and Summer finally let go Summer walked over and hugged Ryan, Seth felt angry again she let go of Ryan and gave him a kiss on the cheek, Summer hugged everyone else and they all decided to go and eat at the Roberts house.

XXOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOXOXOXOXOXXOOXOXXOXO

SUMMERS POV

I haven't been in my room since I hurt myself I walked in Cohen right behind me and Dropped my bags, the room looked so clean like nothing never happened it was so clean I got new carpet, my bathroom was spick and span.

"It looks like nothing every happen"

"Yea well your dad had them erase every fragment of what happened the month I left and the day you left to "camp away"" Said Seth

I turned and Hugged Seth, it felt so right to hug him to be in his arms like this was meant to be, him and jess broke up 2 days after I left for the camp, but every time me and Seth hugged he always pulled away lightly I wondered why.

As I looked at him in his eyes he stared right back at me his eyes softened once he noticed she was looking at him.

Summer and Seth leaned in and there lips met, it felt so right Summer knew this was meant to be Seth pulled away

"I can't Summer, I know who you're in love with and it's not me so you don't have to hide it"

"what do you mean who I'm in love with?"

"I know you have feelings for Ryan I heard you told Ryan you're in love with him!" said Seth

"Cohen I told Ryan I love you cause, I do as a friend only as a friend nothing else"

"only has a friend?" I nodded my head and slipped my hands into his I looked into his eyes

"Cohen you're the one I love, Only you I love you."

"I love you to Summer" Seth leaned in and kissed me very passionately

we fell on my bed before I knew it I had my shirt off and was now heading for Seth's pants he pulled his pants off, and pulled me down on top of him so he could take off my bra strap he got it off and looked at me like I was the most beautiful women in the world my skirt which was now on the floor next to Seth boxers my thong was now on top of the canapé, Seth was now kissing down my neck and going straight down to my belly button he lick all around my stomach, he know layed on top of me and Entered me in and out faster and faster…………

"Summer sweetie don't leave your company waiting.."

Seth and I looked up at non other then my dad

Lol so yea I don't know what I am supposed to do I don't do sex scenes maybe cause I have never had sex so I don't know how to you know lol so yea um review for me thanks!

SUMMERAN1