(Two)
Hours earlier and far far away, Gambit was in the blackness, screaming.
This had not been a good day at all. He had just spent the better part of an hour trapped in a file playback of Kimble's memories, reliving the tattered life that the poor Siskan had endured. There had been pain and joy, love and hatred, but ultimately, an understanding of his new friend that Gambit would never have gained otherwise. Problem was, that understanding had come with a hefty price.
He had lived Kimble's life and then Kimble's death as well, sharing Zander's horrific death experience. There had been a sword fight, a brief violent exchange. The same way he had felt Kimble's life, he had experienced every thrusted sword, every heated curse flung at him by those who had refused to understand.
Needless to say, it hadn't been much fun and the damn thing still wasn't over just yet. He didn't know how much more he could endure. He had felt every blade cut him, every blow collide with Zander's body, the burning shock of a murderous electrical weapon. He thought for sure he himself would die as well, for who could withstand such agony and survive?
The battle that ended Kimble's life with the Clan was over and as Kimble's life force had dimmed, Remy found himself fading into the black. He had expected this to come to a close, but it wasn't the end. The fading turned into falling and he was now drifting down through that tunnel of black empty space, on his way to some strange new destination. He could hear Zander screaming alongside him in the black, but was at the same time alone. They were still bonded, he sensed Kimble was very close, their minds still melded together in suffering even as their bodies were separating while he fell. He was becoming more and more himself, the human he had been before all this began.
Suddenly there was light, but it wasn't the end of the tunnel, not just yet. It was another furious flash of images in playback, flickering by on floating screens, too fast to be truly seen. He caught enough to see snapshots of Sheyman and Siska, the rooms at Clan Station Nine, and Valentin's ugly cruel face. These were repeating images from the memory files, Remy reasoned, but was disappointed that this thing wasn't over. Why wasn't he waking up? Why wasn't he back on the Lucky Dragon? Why wasn't he dead? It was blinding, horrifying, and Gambit continued to scream.
Zander was still there like some kind invisible ghost, his scream was not drowned out by Remy's own, but he was joined by more voices. Gambit thought he heard a young girl, another tiny child as well, but it was all too fast and horrifying for him to be able to analyze. All he knew was they weren't alone in here although Remy could make no one out besides himself. The images didn't slow down, but their brightness eventually dimmed, they were dying. He was dying.
"Non!" Remy shouted, wanting none of this. He had done nothing to deserve this, he shouldn't be the one dying now. "Aidez-moi, s'il vous plait! 'Elp me! Somebody!"
There was no answer and Remy began to fervently pray, falling back on the soothing words of his Catholic childhood without even thinking about it. It had been years since he had found himself in Mass, his crimes had seen to that, but he had never lost his faith, never forgotten those simple comforting prayers. Sure, he didn't believe himself worthy of Heaven, but he was confident enough to think he hadn't deserved this flashing, blinking horror. He was ready to be done, ready to go if that was what God desired. He called out to that God, to Jesus, for someone to stop this nightmare and just let him be finished. The prayers filled him with an odd comfort and peace overcame his fears, there was nothing more that could hurt him, nothing could be worse than what had happened to him already.
Someone was listening. The pictures eventually ebbed away and Remy finally sensed that there was something below him, that there was end to this journey after all. There would be a floor, a pillow, something he was going to land on, his heightened spacial awareness demanded it. Of course his mutation didn't let him down, but it wasn't a floor or a pillow, it was a lake that awaited him.
He splashed down without pain into a body of water that was illuminated by some eerie purple light. Everywhere and everything around him was suddenly purple, as if he'd fallen into a vast vat of grape Kool-ade. Grape Kool-ade - the drink of impoverished orphans worldwide - he despised it. He knew that wasn't the point. This color meant something, it was very important to Kimble somehow, but he had no clue why purple should mean anything at all at this point. They were dead, right?
He didn't have time to ponder long. He was exhausted and there was no land in sight. The voices he had heard were now silent, he was alone. Separate. He called out for help again, but there was no one else here. His cries became begging and the begging returned once more to prayers. This was some kind of insane torture. If he was supposed to die, so be it, but why did he have to suffer like this?
Gambit gradually ran out of steam and could fight this no longer. He was so tired...so tired. He conceded to the forces behind this and released his anger and his fear, feeling a strange serenity engulf him. He took one last gulp of air and sank down into the water, unable to keep himself afloat any longer. The light that had once been below him was now above him and he was slipping down into a deep purple blackness. He let go of the air in his lungs and took in water, too exhausted to resist it. He was slipping away.
"Rogue..." he called out, unsure if he had spoken the word or not. He saw his lover's face and wished with all of his heart to see her again, to be with her once more. Lord, he loved her. He loved her more than life itself. So much time he'd wasted on playing stupid mindless games, he'd never really opened up to her. So much they could have done if he'd been a better friend to her instead of always playing around. "Je suis de'sole, mon ador'ee. Gambit love you, 'e love you fo' all time. Au revoir, mon chere. Au revoir!"
Gambit closed his eyes and let the blackness take him. He was still sinking down through black water, not really minding he wasn't breathing anymore. He knew this would pass and he would die, for real this time. He waited for the light to finally claim him with it's promise of Purgatory or worse, but what came to him instead was laughter. Bright musical laughter that filled his heart with joy. A female voice from somewhere around him spoke next and reached down into his very soul, saying words filled with motherly love. "You did well, my son. But not ready for the light are you. There is much work to be done. Be brave."
"Espe're! Wait!" he shouted, coming back to life and reaching out into the darkness with his hands. He found nothing, instead he came awake suddenly on Fallen's bed back on the Lucky Dragon. This transformation had been just as violent as the file switching had been before, and quite frankly, he'd had enough. Unsure of what was real anymore, he jerked with a startled shout and pulled away from Henry who had come rushing to his side.
"Easy, now," Henry soothed cautiously, slowing his pace.
Gambit couldn't speak. He was undone by all the pleasure, pain and suffering that had been shoved into him from Kimble's telepathic link. He had felt Kimble's lovemaking intensely and then getting stabbed and shot down just as strongly. It may as well have been his own death he had just experienced. He had no explanation for what had just happened and wasn't anywhere near ready to listen to anyone just now. He was shaking and going into hysterical shock.
Remy jumped up and stood on the bed as he backed away into the corner. He automatically slid a handful of cards from his pocket. Some of them fell sloppily to the mattress in his haste and confusion, but he managed to charge three of them and hold them before they all dropped. He didn't have much power left and they only glowed weakly, but he didn't notice. He held them out in front of him defensively and blurted out nonsensical threats in ragged Cajun French, not even fully aware of where he was.
"You're back now, Remy. Just relax," Henry soothed.
Gambit lowered his hand slowly. He was quivering violently, still in shock. The cards fizzled out and dropped loosely from his shaking fingers. He pushed back all the way against the wall, covering his face with his arms crossed at the wrists, his hands held out in a warding off gesture, he wanted no one near him at that moment. He was seriously trashed - he wanted to scream, he wanted to bawl, he wanted to throw up. He felt raw and scraped all through his mind, like his brains were bleeding. Nothing he had ever experienced had ever felt like this. He would take a big bloody fight over this emotional horror any day. He started to hitch, his eyes flooding with tears, but he refused to outright bawl, not in a crowd.
Henry moved another step closer but respectfully kept his distance. "It's all right," he repeated. He wasn't sure of that, seeing Remy so utterly trashed, but hoped that just his soothing voice might make it so. "Just relax. Everything is going to be fine now."
Remy nodded at him, his face still covered, and tried his best to calm down. He was alive and safe it seemed, it was all a bad dream. His prayers had been answered, he was alive to fight another day, scraped brains and all.
Logan rose stiffly from the seats again and shuffled drunkenly to the cage. He wanted to see Remy and sniff him out to be sure he was okay. Remy was part of his team and belonged to him. Logan resented deeply that Remy had been forced to witness Kimble's life like that. If he was damaged, someone was going to pay. Only a severe jolt to his sensibilities would make Remy break like that and it sent Wolverine's protection gears immediately whirling into hyper-drive. He swiftly stepped around Fallen and Kimble and went to his teammate. He wasn't as polite as Beast, he rudely took in a deep breath of Remy's air and touched him lightly on the top of his head, forcing the kid to look at him.
Gambit looked up at him and his red, tear flooded eyes opened wide in surprise. His senses were still heightened and he was startled to see how bright Logan looked. His shimmer was very strong, the brightest of all the people Remy had seen. His life force was very powerful and it clung about him, brilliant in its intensity.
Remy gasped as Logan's emotions washed into him from the physical contact. He actually "felt" Logan's resentment towards Kimble for what had been done to him. It was mixed with an odd combination of other emotions. Logan was concerned for him and genuinely afraid that he had been hurt. Logan wanted to protect him and would do anything to do it. He belonged to Logan as part of the X-men and he loved all of his X-men. Wolverine would kill anyone who tried to hurt them no matter what the cost. But that wasn't all of it. Logan...Logan loved him. Loved him like a son or a brother even though they argued all of the time and he wasn't so kind with his mouth. Logan loved him because they were the same. They were X-men for all the same reasons. Charles Xavier had offered them both redemption for past crimes and they had accepted. They were both here working off their own personal debts to themselves, saving their own souls. Logan had forgiven him for his terrible crime long ago, even before they had been taken by the Dognan, and now only wanted to see him safely home.
Remy appreciated it more than he could say but it was more than his body could take. He shoved away from everyone and bolted into Fallen's lavatory. He fell to his knees in front of the commode and began to heave, his body trying to reject all that had been done to it this day.
Henry followed him in and stood a respective distance away. As his physician, he had seen Gambit sick enough times to know he hated it when anyone was close to him when he threw up. He didn't want to hover but was deeply worried that Remy had suffered permanent psychological damage. Only time would tell.
Logan backed away from the bed, his mouth creased in a frown. He didn't understand why Remy had reacted to him that way. It looked like Remy was terrified of him, but he hadn't done anything to the boy besides touch him. It hurt but he shoved the pain down like he did everything else. He turned abruptly when he heard Kimble start to scream.
