Follow/Fav Snippets From the Potterverse
By: Dragon Mistress
Short snippets of life in the Harry Potter universe. Outrageous fan clubs, killer condiments, murderous toasters, and more! OOTP and HBP spoilers abound! SiriusRemus SLASH as well!The person who died in HBP is alive and well!
Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor - Chapters: 92 - Words: 51,246 - Reviews: 656 - Favs: 206 - Follows: 59 - Updated: Sep 1, 2005 - Published: May 15, 2004 - id: 1862547
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Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten
< Prev 1. Sirius' Fan Club, Part 1 2. Moody Versus Kitchen Condiments 3. Sirius' Fan Club, Part 2 4. Occupied! 5. Snape and the Nightmare Of A Lifetime 6. Dolores Umbridge Vs the Toaster of Doom 7. Brownie Bricks Of Doom 8. Television, Part 1 9. Drunken Professors Make Good Lovers 10. Bits In the Marmalade 11. Long Black Hair Club 12. Flying Monopoly, Batman! 13. Double Entendre 14. Pie This Way 15. Trelawney Goes Out 16. The Attic, Part 1: Glittery, Gay Past 17. The Attic, Part 2: Mum's Favourite Hats 18. The Attic, Part 3: Mystery Box 19. Department Store Follies 20. That's A Pretty Big Bug, Part 1 21. Leather Trousers of Doom 22. The Expedition 23. That's A Pretty Big Bug, Part 2 24. Delivery! 25. It's Just You, Monica 26. Birds and Bees 27. Who Likes Short Shorts? 28. Back To School Shopping 29. We Don't Need No Education 30. Missing The Kids? 31. How I Spent My Summer Holiday 32. Basilisk Burgers 33. Werewolf PMS 34. Boom, Baby 35. Mmm, Slanty 36. Draco Malfoy, Uber Genius 37. Shake N' Bake 38. Parvati's Wardrobe Disaster 39. Disturbing Sights 40. Drama Queen 41. Faerie Godmother 42. The Horrible Truth 43. Arachnophobia 44. DADA, Part 1 45. DADA, Part 2 46. DADA, Part 3 47. DADA, The Conclusion 48. Sirius' Fan Club, Part 3 49. Wee R the Death Eaters! Phear Us! 50. ChatUp Lines 51. Luci In The Sky With Diamonds 52. Tom's Very Secret Diary 53. Snuffles Has the Sniffles 54. Thestrals Run Amok 55. Unsolved Mysteries 56. Mystic Crystal Revelations 57. Take The Long Way Home 58. Not In England Anymore 59. End of the Road 60. Sirius and Mrs Weasley 61. The Rita Skeeter Interview 62. How The Potions Master Stole Christmas 63. Hot For Teacher 64. Psycho Killer, Qu’est ce Que C’est? 65. Lucius' New Lover 66. Crookshanks The Prince 67. Lord of the Rings Condensed Version 68. Hairclips Are IN This Season! 69. How NOT To Be Seen 70. Hagrid's Tiki Hut 71. Voodoo Lady 72. Crookshanks The Prince, Part 2 73. Homework 74. Harry's Profit Margin 75. Remus' Fan Club 76. Human Piece of Toast 77. Go Fish! 78. Scrabble 79. When We Was Fab 80. Karoke Contest 81. Worst Episode Ever 82. St Anger 83. That's A Pretty Big Bug, Part 3 84. We're Here, We're Queer, Get Used To It 85. Some Kind of Monster 86. Snape's Bubbling Cauldron of DOOM! 87. Mystery Date 88. Fetch, Ooboo, Fetch 89. Intense Rivals 90. Fondue For Buckbeak 91. Trash TV 92. Two of A Kind Next >
Disclaimers: See the first chapter. Snippets From the PotterverseChapter 6 - Dolores Umbridge Versus the Toaster Of Doom Dolores Umbridge peered into the every cupboard in her kitchen. There were no centaurs in any of them. Breathing a sigh of relief, Umbridge popped bread into her toaster. Then she crossed to the fridge. She pried the door open with a broomstick, standing well away from it. When she saw there were no centaurs inside, she put the broom down and took the butter and juice out of the fridge. This was the way she had been living ever since she left Hogwarts a few weeks before. She rarely left her house, preferring instead to have her groceries delivered to her and her work owled to her. The toast popped out of the toaster. Umbridge moved forward to retrieve her breakfast. CLANG! The toaster seized her hand! It was burning hot! Umbridge screamed in pain, whacking her hand against the countertop, trying to get the toaster to let go. It was no use! In desperation, Umbridge unplugged the toaster, flinging the cord aside. Bad move. The cord flew right into the half-full sink. ZZZZZZZT. And that was the end of Dolores Umbridge.
< Prev 1. Sirius' Fan Club, Part 1 2. Moody Versus Kitchen Condiments 3. Sirius' Fan Club, Part 2 4. Occupied! 5. Snape and the Nightmare Of A Lifetime 6. Dolores Umbridge Vs the Toaster of Doom 7. Brownie Bricks Of Doom 8. Television, Part 1 9. Drunken Professors Make Good Lovers 10. Bits In the Marmalade 11. Long Black Hair Club 12. Flying Monopoly, Batman! 13. Double Entendre 14. Pie This Way 15. Trelawney Goes Out 16. The Attic, Part 1: Glittery, Gay Past 17. The Attic, Part 2: Mum's Favourite Hats 18. The Attic, Part 3: Mystery Box 19. Department Store Follies 20. That's A Pretty Big Bug, Part 1 21. Leather Trousers of Doom 22. The Expedition 23. That's A Pretty Big Bug, Part 2 24. Delivery! 25. It's Just You, Monica 26. Birds and Bees 27. Who Likes Short Shorts? 28. Back To School Shopping 29. We Don't Need No Education 30. Missing The Kids? 31. How I Spent My Summer Holiday 32. Basilisk Burgers 33. Werewolf PMS 34. Boom, Baby 35. Mmm, Slanty 36. Draco Malfoy, Uber Genius 37. Shake N' Bake 38. Parvati's Wardrobe Disaster 39. Disturbing Sights 40. Drama Queen 41. Faerie Godmother 42. The Horrible Truth 43. Arachnophobia 44. DADA, Part 1 45. DADA, Part 2 46. DADA, Part 3 47. DADA, The Conclusion 48. Sirius' Fan Club, Part 3 49. Wee R the Death Eaters! Phear Us! 50. ChatUp Lines 51. Luci In The Sky With Diamonds 52. Tom's Very Secret Diary 53. Snuffles Has the Sniffles 54. Thestrals Run Amok 55. Unsolved Mysteries 56. Mystic Crystal Revelations 57. Take The Long Way Home 58. Not In England Anymore 59. End of the Road 60. Sirius and Mrs Weasley 61. The Rita Skeeter Interview 62. How The Potions Master Stole Christmas 63. Hot For Teacher 64. Psycho Killer, Qu’est ce Que C’est? 65. Lucius' New Lover 66. Crookshanks The Prince 67. Lord of the Rings Condensed Version 68. Hairclips Are IN This Season! 69. How NOT To Be Seen 70. Hagrid's Tiki Hut 71. Voodoo Lady 72. Crookshanks The Prince, Part 2 73. Homework 74. Harry's Profit Margin 75. Remus' Fan Club 76. Human Piece of Toast 77. Go Fish! 78. Scrabble 79. When We Was Fab 80. Karoke Contest 81. Worst Episode Ever 82. St Anger 83. That's A Pretty Big Bug, Part 3 84. We're Here, We're Queer, Get Used To It 85. Some Kind of Monster 86. Snape's Bubbling Cauldron of DOOM! 87. Mystery Date 88. Fetch, Ooboo, Fetch 89. Intense Rivals 90. Fondue For Buckbeak 91. Trash TV 92. Two of A Kind Next >
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