Disclaimer: I own everything and everyone of LotR. Okay, okay, I don't. Ya happy? I own nothing! ;-;

Warnings: Angst, angst… ummm… maybe some more… angst. And… uhhh… rated R for rape! No flames please! No A/L in here, either… ;-;

Sry for all grammar and/or spelling mistakes.

Well, I dunno how this chapter quite turned out… I'm sick and I dunno how it effected my writing… --shrugs-- Just let me know what you think, alright?

I'm so glad so many of you are enjoying this fic, too. n.n Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! Please keep them comin'! n.n


Unforgivable Pain

Chapter Three: Estel, hope

Legolas cried for a long time, letting out all his anguish, helplessness, and despair.

Elrond was only glad to give comfort to the distraught elf. He knew how much he needed this.

The blonde's tears had finally stopped, but he didn't move and still clung to the back of the elf-lord's tunic as if it were his lifeline.

"Legolas, look at me," Elrond said, after minutes had passed. He had to try and help the poor elf again; hopefully he'd be able to get farther this time.

The younger elf slowly brought his tear-stained face up to the elder elf.

Elrond's resolve almost broke when he saw this, but he had to help. "You need to tell me what happened to you so I can help. I will not tell anyone, if you wish…" he added, urging the elf.

At this Legolas lowered his now dull blue eyes, ashamed.

"There is no need to be ashamed, penneth. I'm sure it was not your fault," he assured the blonde. He had seen the shame in his eyes before they were lowered. He thought he knew what had happened. Now, he just needed to hear it because he desperately prayed against all the evidence that it was not true. "Please, Legolas…"

"I-I… cannot…" Legolas stuttered. To Elrond's dismay tears welled-up again. It was too hard to talk about it, especially to the elf-lord. The images made it even more difficult.

"Iston, but you must," the elf-lord pried, hoping he would not come to regret it later. "If you truly cannot, then just allow me to treat all your wounds," he said after minutes of silence.

"But…" the blonde trailed off, not knowing what to say. He could think of no excuses this time, either.

"Please, Legolas, they have already gone untreated for too long, the wounds on your legs especially," Elrond said in a pleading tone, with slight hesitation on the word 'legs.' This definitely wasn't good for the elf… to say the least. He had probably reopened the wounds during one of his nightmares as well.

Legolas very reluctantly nodded in agreement. He'd do it, but only for Elrond. He hated to worry everyone so much. Maybe this would ease their worry… he hoped. Why did I end up here? he thought. There were too many caring people around, which was usually a very good thing, but now they pried too much. Maybe, if possible, he'd try to leave later…

Why had Elrond been so hesitant anyway? Did he know? Probably. Legolas hated the notion, but the elder elf had been a healer for thousands of years now; he had seen many situations so it wasn't unlikely that he knew. Still, though… Legolas preferred him not knowing.

Elrond told the blonde to lie on the bed since Aragorn had already brought the herbs and bandages in.

Before Legolas moved he looked at the healer and with a forlorn expression said, "Just… just do not tell the others… please."

"Of course," the elf-lord said without hesitation. As a healer, confidentiality was a given if it was something so traumatizing. He was sure this was tearing the blonde up on the inside even more than what he showed unintentionally.

When Legolas laid on the bed his breathing increased, fear was starting to take over. He tried to calm it. And it worked…

Then Elrond got to his legs. The distraught elf started to panic.

The healer hoped he wouldn't react like this; at the moment he could do nothing to calm him down. All the soothing words, shouts of his name, all the things that had worked before, now had no effect.

He swore under his breath when he realized Legolas had retreated too far into his mind to comprehend anything going on around him. He didn't know if he'd be able to snap the blonde out of it this time.

Next thing Legolas knew he was pinned down by four humans. There were too many of them; there was no chance of escape, especially not now. They apparently knew the strength of elves, for they did not underestimate him in the slightest.

"Caught you, my little elf," the human, who had knocked him down and was now on top of him, whispered in his ear, sending a shiver of fear down his spine.

"Get off!" the blonde shouted, trying to shake the foolish human off his back. However, the others had too tight of a hold on him.

"Oh no, my elf, that would make this impossible," the same human said, while starting to take Legolas' leggings off.

The blonde's eyes widened in surprise, but more of terror. This was not happening!

"Legolas! Legolas, come back to me!" The blonde heard from somewhere deep within his horrible memory. He immediately focused on the voice, wanting nothing more than to escape what was happening to him.

Then he realized who was talking: Elrond. He snapped out of his thoughts. He hadn't wanted to react like this again!

Legolas turned on his side, bringing his arms over his head, ignoring the screams of protest his body sent him. Tears escaped again, however, this time it did not last long.

Elrond was relieved when he saw that the young elf had returned, but then his mood declined when he saw the effect it had on the already distraught elf. He placed a hand on the elf's arm. "I'm so sorry, Legolas," he said sadly. He shouldn't have pressured him into this. He had treated the wounds on his upper section again, though. If only he could treat the more important ones!

The prince didn't say anything or move, still shaken by the terrible memory.

Elrond watched Legolas sadly. It was cases like this that were the hardest for the victim, and the healer. It only made it harder since Legolas was like his own son.

He sat on the chair from before and buried his head into his hands. Was there nothing he could do to help? Rape wasn't commonly treated among elves, for the victims normally died before anyone could help them, or they died even with the help. It was a terrible crime against any race, but even worse for elves. They were a pure race, with love of nature; most of which with no evil temptations… of course there were the few, like with any race. Rape was too much for elves to handle. The ones that survived it, which were very few indeed, were scarred for life and were never the same.

The elf-lord sighed heavily. What would become of Legolas? He could not allow him to die! That was all he knew at the moment.

He looked back at the broken elf and saw that he had fallen asleep. That was a good thing. He definitely needed the sleep. His exhausted body hardly received any whatsoever. Elrond only wished it would last for more than a few hours before the nightmares took over the poor elf's mind. Maybe he could brew up a tea to help when he next woke. It would be worth the try for sure.

The elder elf heard footsteps approaching. He stood up and quickly went to the door. He didn't want whoever it was to accidentally wake up the elf. By the sound of it, though, it was his son, Estel. The footsteps were too heavy to be an elf's.

He opened the door and… sure enough, Estel stood there with a worried expression marring his handsome features.

"What are you doing up, ion-nin?" the dark-haired elf whispered the question, although he knew the answer already.

The human took note of the tone and came to the conclusion that either Legolas was asleep or loud voices would startle him again. "I could sleep no longer," he whispered trying to look beyond his father to his friend to see his condition. "Is… is he doing any better?"

"Nay, the nightmares are haunting him; causing him to get little to no rest," said Elrond sadly. He put his finger to his lips, telling his son to be quiet and allowed his son to enter.

The human nodded and walked over to Legolas. Looking at the elf made his heart clench. The elf slept with his eyes closed, which was unusual for elves, for they only slept like that when in agony, exhaustion or emotional distress. Unfortunately, it was all of the above for the elf before him. His rest was anything but peaceful.

"Has he told you anything yet?" he asked in a quiet whisper.

"Nay; he came close to it, but said he could not tell me," the elf-lord replied, looking at his son. He could tell this was tearing him apart as well. He hated seeing his friend in such a condition… as did everyone else, but Aragorn was the closest to the elf, it was bound to hurt more.

"Estel, you really should get more rest…" Elrond said caringly. He knew that the human would not be able to sleep, however, even if he could convince him to go to his chambers, which would be a very difficult task indeed.

"You need not say that to know my response," the human said, going to Legolas' side and taking the chair he was going to before.

The elder elf nodded in agreement. He realized his son probably hadn't even seen the nod, though, for he had been inspecting the blonde elf before him.

Elrond looked out the balcony to see the sun was now sending its rays over everything instead of the moon's glow.

He sighed. He'd just let Aragorn stay with his friend. Legolas needed his anyway, even if it only placed a deep fear within him. Aragorn was human; nothing could change that. But what also couldn't be changed was the fact that Aragorn and Legolas were very close friends. The blonde would soon realize this and overcome his fear. He desperately hoped.

The elf-lord clenched his fist in anger. Those humans needed to pay for doing this to such an innocent and peaceful elf. How could they do such a thing in the first place! It angered him to no end.

Elrond looked to his son and saw how much this whole situation hurt him. Legolas would panic the most around him since it was humans that had caused this. Aragorn had no idea that humans had done something to him either.

Aragorn seemed to be glad just being by the elf, or better than before at least. Here he was able to keep an eye on the elf and help if possible.

Elrond, knowing Legolas was in great hands, slipped out of the room to freshen up a bit; not to mention stretch his legs. While they didn't get stiff like a human's might during that amount of time it was still good to walk around. It also gave him some time to think about a few things without distractions being around him, and it gave the two friends time together, which, hopefully, wouldn't be a bad thing. He couldn't stay away for too long, however. He didn't want to leave him there, with Aragorn – a human – in case he panicked like before. This was terrible for his son, for hehad done nothing wrong; he had only been born human.


Aragorn watched Legolas with a deep sadness. He looked so… vulnerable and even fragile. He had never seen him this way before and he hated seeing it now.

Aragorn thought he heard Legolas say something, but wasn't sure. He listened carefully, and heard nothing.

A few minutes later he swore he heard something again. He looked down at Legolas harder and saw that his lips were actually moving. He moved closer, his head to the side so his ear was near Legolas' mouth.

The elf was speaking! It had just been too quiet for his human ears to pick up, except for a few words here and there.

Should he wake him or let him sleep?

He decided to just let him sleep. If the dream got like it was before then he'd do something about it.

Before he sat back down he heard something that shocked and confused him. 'Human.' He didn't now what to make of this. Legolas' tone held only fear when speaking. Had he done something to his friend? He could remember nothing, but had he done it on accident; without realizing it? He wasn't sure. He'd have to inquire when the elf woke up.

Legolas' mumbled words were becoming louder. "No… human… Stop..." The man caught the few words, as the elf started to struggle as before. The fear in the words caused the most pain to the ranger. He hated hearing the once strong and proud elf sound like this.

A stab of fear shot through his heart when a horrible thought hit him. It had entered his mind before as well, but he had instantly pushed it away without another thought. With all the injuries Legolas had… How his behavior was towards him; even Elrond… Had Legolas been… No, he refused to believe it… but, that seemed to be the only explanation. Or was it? Valar, he hoped not.

Legolas' thrashing was becoming more violent and harmful towards his health. Aragorn had to wake him up, it had progressed too much. He should have been paying more attention.

After a few minutes of desperate pleas and shaking, the blonde finally awoke with a start; tears once against falling silently down his face.

Aragorn had to fight hard against his own emotions so he would be able to help his friend, or try to.

Legolas stared at Aragorn in fear at first, his memories still fresh in his mind. He started to back away from him.

"Peace, mellon-nin. All is well. None shall harm you; especially not I," the human said soothingly. He only hoped it would get through the elf's troubled mind.

"…Estel?" the blonde asked seemingly just noticing it was him. It even sounded doubtful, as if he didn't believe his eyes.

"I'm right here," the ranger reassured his terrified friend. "Worry not."

Legolas seemed to relax a little when he realized that he had only had another nightmare. He let out a shaky sigh of frustration. He had come to the conclusion that they would never stop haunting him.

Aragorn was going to go closer to the blonde elf to get him the comfort he needed, however, he thought better of it, remembering what his reaction was before. It felt like his heart was physically being torn in two by this whole situation and that he couldn't even give his friend the needed comfort because he became terrified by his presence. He was at a lost for what to do.

"Forgive me, Legolas. I know not what I can do," he said dejectedly. "Tell me, please. I want to help you, mellon-nin."

The prince looked at him and shook his head sadly. "I do not think you can…" It sounded like the elf had given up on... everything. In face, he had; the only thing that kept him going was Aragorn, his family and friends. Even if he reacted to the people around him as he did, it wasn't intentional and he still cared deeply for all of them. He felt completely horrible for how he had been reacting towards his best friend. However, there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Aragorn stared at the blonde elf in disbelief. Since when did the stubborn Prince of Mirkwood give up so easily? He couldn't believe it. He never gave up like this! Then again, a situation like this had never happened before. He wished it could have stayed that way, too. But… still, he hated seeing the usual cheerful elf so… forlorn and broken; like there was no hope left. Well, he'd just have to restore that hope. He was true to his name: Estel, and brought hope to many impossible situations. He swore he would revive the hope within Legolas. He couldn't bear to see the elf fade; it would tear him up.

"Mellon-nin, do not say such things. And do not lose hope," the human said comfortingly.

Legolas gave a faint smile, but it was there nonetheless and it brought Aragorn's mood up slightly. "Hannon le, Estel," the elf said, glad for the distraction from his memories.

He didn't know what he could possibly do, though. The fear in him kept growing. He thought that he'd be fine if Aragorn kept his distance, however. That hurt more than anything at the moment: not being able to have his friend close.

"Legolas…?" the young man asked uncertainly. The blonde elf had buried his face in his hands.

Aragorn frowned deeply. What could he do? What could anyone do?


What indeed. n.n

Hope you're all still enjoying this. I dunno if I really like this one too much, though. --shrugs-- At least my updates are frequent, right? I just hope they stay that way… n.n;;;

Review Responses… I was about to type 'alerts'… -.-;;; seepy time…

Haldir's Heart and Soul – So do I! Let's all go after them!

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empath89 – Thx; I'm glad ya liked that scene. n.n To tell ya that truth… I did, too… --shifts eyes-- Nay, sry, should have worded that better before. The sequel was for Iinotia (my first LotR fic). Sry for the wording it like that.

Lynx Yamato – Thank you so much! n.n

Harry Estel – I know! The poor elf! Let's all cry for him… ;-; Heh… yeah, it definitely won't be. Two already suspect… --sighs-- Poor, poor Legolas…

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