Chapter Four Sugar and Mental Homes
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh.
Again, a big thank you to all who reviewed.
Joey, Tristan, Yami, and Bakura were walking home from the mall after a very strange experience with Alister, when Marik pulled up on his motorcycle. "Yo Pharaoh!" Marik called.
Yami turned around, while the others simply kept walking. "What?" Yami asked coldly.
"Hey." Marik pouted. "I wasn't that bad! All I did was send a bunch of people to the shadow realm and mind controlled a bunch of other people and tried to send you to the shadow realm so I can take over the world... Who wouldn't?"
Yami just stared.
Marik rolled his eyes "Ishizu made me take anger management classes..." he said, sounding moody. "Anyways, you want in or not?" Marik asked.
"Whaddya mean?" Yami asked.
Marik's eyes glinted. "Are you down to come with me and jack some sugar?"
Yami's eyes glinted as well. "I'm in!"
At mental institution:
Kaiba and Alister sat in the room they were given, staring as a man lead Duke in.
"Hi." said Duke.
"Hi." said Kaiba.
"Hi." said Alister.
There was silence, for ten minutes no one said a word.
"CHOPSTICKS!" Duke screamed suddenly.
Kaiba and Alister looked at Duke. "He's one of us!" they both confirmed with glee.
"What now?" Kaiba asked.
"Lets dance the conga!" Duke said.
"Why?" Kaiba asked.
Duke shrugged. "It sounds like fun?"
So they all did.
The fourth man in the cell, a stranger, interrupted their dancing by addressing Kaiba. "Hey, bro-" but Kaiba stopped him, saying "Do not call me 'bro'... I am not your brother."
Alister bore a smug look. "No, but I am your father!"
"NOOOOOOOO... hey, wait, you're not my father." Kaiba said after a sudden realization.
Alister pouted.
"So, I'm here cuz I'm obsessed with chopsticks." Duke spoke up conversationally. "You?"
"I dunno... I was just running from the Cursed Veggie Man..." Kaiba explained.
"I'm Darth Vader!" Alister said.
Kaiba crossed his arms stubbornly. "Have you jumped in a volcano?"
"Well... No…" Alister admitted.
"Then you're not Darth Vader! You're only Vader after you jump in a volcano." Kaiba said matter-of-factly.
Alister looked like he was about to cry.
"Then we gotta break outta here to find Alister a volcano!" Duke said in a final tone.
They all nodded in agreement, and Alister did what could have only been a "I'm-going-to-jump-into-a-volcano-after-I-break-out-of-my-mental-home-so-I-can-become-Darth-Vader" dance.
"I have a plan." Kaiba announced dramatically.
He pulled out the frozen peas he had on him. Duke and Alister gasped.
Kaiba then pulled out the slingshot from his back pocket. (He always carried a slingshot in his back pocket. Duh.) He shot peas until, surprisingly, the wall broke down.
"YAY!!!" they all screamed.
Meanwhile:
Marik and Yami arrived at an odd building. Yami gasped as he entered, jerking his head in all directions. (Which, with that hair of his, is fairly dangerous) Everywhere there was tons and tons of… "SUGAR!!!" Yami screamed, running to some cotton candy.
Marik pushed Yami's arm down. Yami gazed at him angrily. "Dude, it's sugar. Let me eat my sugar."
"Hey man, we're Egyptian." Marik said, smirking as he tossed him a jar of honey.
"Awesome!" Yami yelled with enthusiasm.
"Ready?"
"Ready!" Yami said, as they both furiously began eating honey at top speed. The honey was gone all too soon, and Yami stared mournfully into his now empty jar.
"Don't worry, just eat something else." Marik said in an oddly dreamy tone.
Indeed, they simply moved on to another sweet. After all, there was a whole room of sugar.
Back to the mental 3:
Kaiba, Alister and Duke were running down the street together, Alister humming the Imperial March.
"Can you fly?" Duke asked Kaiba at random.
"Of course I can fly." Kaiba responded.
"Nu-uh… you can't fly." Duke said childishly.
"Yes I can." Kaiba argued.
"Nu-uh!"
"Yeah-huh!"
"Nu-huh!"
"Yeah-huh!"
"Nu-uh!"
"Yeah-huh!"
(3 hours later…)
"He's over there!" Bakura called to Joey, and both started running after Kaiba.
Mokuba was busy searching the other half of the town. Joey had tagged along with Bakura because he was bored. (Yami couldn't be found since he was busy eating sugar with Marik, and Tristan had a sewing class.)
"Nu-uh!" Duke was still arguing.
"Yeah-huh! I can prove it!" Kaiba said.
"Okay!"
So, Kaiba ran to the top of a tall building, and jumped. Luckily his pants got caught on a telephone poll, so he survived.
"He flew!" Duke said with awe.
Duke and Alister quickly began clapping.
Bakura let out an intense sigh of relief. It'd be a serious cut in his pay if Kaiba died. He pulled out his cell phone. "Mokuba, we found him!" he said quickly, and hung up.
Kaiba fell from the poll, and his pants ripped, revealing red boxers imprinted with blue eyes white dragon's on them.
"Not surprising..." Duke noted.
Bakura looked away. "I did not need to see that." he said.
Kaiba looked extremely dazed. "Oh hello... who are you all?" he asked, pulling up his pants.
A look went from Alister to Duke to Joey to Tristan (he had just come out of his sewing class, which was conveniently located right there.) to Bakura "Mokuba is going to kill me..." Bakura muttered.
Joey took a step towards Kaiba "I'm Joey... you know, da one you call 3rd rank duelist."
Kaiba blinked, not remembering. "Who am I?" he asked.
"Seto Kaiba you're da-" but he stopped, beaming as if a light bulb appeared over his head.
Joey gave an evil smirk. "You're Seto Kaiba, the hillbilly, and you're late for your family reunion!"
Meanwhile:
Yami was bouncing up and down along with Marik, as they both were clearly very sugar high.
"Sugar! Sugar! Sugar! Sugar! Sugar! Sugar!" The two chanted in unison.
Yami was about to eat a chocolate bar when Marik stopped him.
"A chocolate bar? That's for babies, we can handle more sugar that that!" Marik said, grabbing two bags of pure sugar.
He passed one to Yami, both quickly tearing the bag open.
"3, 2, 1, Go!" They said at the same time, instantly chugging the sugar.
Back to Kaiba:
"I'm missing a family reunion!" Kaiba yelped. "Oh boy I better get down there right away!" he added, suddenly wearing overalls, a straw hat and no shoes.
"Kaiba's a hillbilly?" Alister asked Duke in surprise.
Duke shrugged. "Must be." quickly following Kaiba, who was running.
Suddenly a limo pulled up and Mokuba hoped out. "Where's Seto?" He demanded instantly.
"He went that way." Joey responded, pointing.
"Why?"
"Joey told him he was a hillbilly..." Tristan explained.
Mokuba stared. "He believed that?"
Bakura winced. "Well... yes. He came down with amnesia..."
Mokuba's left eye twitched. "So you told him he was a hillbilly, Joey?"
Joey said nothing, but his laughter gave him away.
"JOEY!!" Mokuba screamed, tackling him.
"We gotta help Joey!" Tristan said, alarmed.
"But Mokuba's only half his size." Bakura reasoned.
"Yeah, but he's winning!"
And so he was...
