Disclaimers: See the first chapter.

Snippets From the Potterverse

Chapter 74 - Harry's Profit Margin

One cold morning, Hermione and Ron emerged from their dormitories to find Harry sitting at a table in the common room, reading a long scroll of parchment.

"Hi, Harry. What's wrong?" Hermione said, noticing the troubled look on Harry's face.

"Sales of the Deluxe Honeydukes' Harry Doll are down," Harry mumbled.

Hermione and Ron exchanged looks. Perhaps all this attention had driven Harry insane, or they had misheard him. "What did you say?"

"Look!" Harry stretched the parchment across the table for them to view. "The Transforming Professor Lupin Action Figure has been selling quite well, and so has the Transforming Sirius Black Action Figure! But Dementor Fun Playset Harry isn't moving!"

"What is this?" Ron asked.

"My profit margin!" Harry raved. "All the income from my books, my movies, my merchandise!"

"Why are you so concerned?" Hermione asked. "I thought you hated being famous."

"No one likes to know their action figure places second to Snape's," Harry grumbled.

"Look at this!" Hermione's eyes were gleaming. "The Hermione Honeydukes doll is a top seller among female fans!"

"And look! The Ron Weasley Burrow Playset is rated in the top ten for ages six to eleven!" Ron added.

"Hagrid Beach Towel sales are up seven hundred percent!"

"Bertie Bott's Every-Flavour Beans are a hit with the Muggles!"

"Dumbledore's Office Playset and the Potions Class Slime Maker are quite popular within the three-to-twelve age set," Hermione observed. "But the Harry Potter Toothpaste Kit and the Harry Potter Golf Club Covers aren't selling!"

Harry ground his teeth." Don't you see? I'm the famous one, and yet no one buys my stuff!"

"Hey, you're right." Ron glanced down at the end of one of the columns. "Quidditch Fun Harry has only sold three items, ever."

"And your Halloween costumes are doing abysmally," Hermione said sadly.

"Quidditch Fun Draco Malfoy outsold you, Harry!" Ron gasped in horror.

Harry seized the parchment away and stuffed it in his bag. "Stupid thing. I wouldn't even care, if it weren't for the fact my entire income comes from those stupid toys!"

"It figures," Hermione and Ron said together, standing up. Their pockets were bulging with Galleons, the profits from the sales of their own action figures.

"Stupid profit margin," Harry muttered.