Disclaimers: See the first chapter.

Snippets From the Potterverse

Chapter 81 - Worst Episode Ever

Harry walked into the room.

He tripped over a shoe.

"Ow," he complained.

"Ha-ha," Draco laughed.

Ron threw the other shoe at Draco.

Hermione ignored everyone and read 'Hogwarts, a History'.

Sirius shrugged, grabbed Remus, and pulled him off for a shag.

Harry got up, and promptly tripped again.

Cornelius Fudge was eaten by the Toaster of Doom, and joined Dolores Umbridge in Hell.

Ron and Draco got into a fight. Everyone gathered 'round to watch.

Except Harry.

He was still on the floor.

Snape deducted a million points from Gryffindor, but since everyone was watching Draco and Ron's fight, no one noticed.

Crabbe and Goyle shared a bag of cheese-and-onion crisps and threw the broken ones at Harry.

Professor Trelawney predicted Harry's death as a result of the fight.

No one cared, except Parvati and Lavender.

"I love you, Draco," said Mr. Snugglekins, Draco's teddy bear.

"I love you too, Mr. Snugglekins," Draco replied, hugging the bear.

Hagrid and Fang put a flaming paper bag of dog poo at the entrance of the Forbidden Forest for the centaurs to find.

Snape deducted a hundred points from Ravenclaw because no one watched his striptease at the karoke contest.

Sirius and Remus finished having sex, and decided to do it again.

Somewhere in Surrey, Vernon Dursley tripped over a shoe.

"Ha-ha," laughed Dudley.

The talking rock burbled underneath the lake.

And somewhere, somewhere, one very frustrated author sat banging her head against the keyboard for ideas.