Disclaimers: See the first chapter.

Snippets From the Potterverse

Chapter 83 - That's A Pretty Big Bug, Part 3

Draco Malfoy's big, icky problems had followed him back to Hogwarts.

Being located in the dungeons, the Slytherin common room was infested with several kinds of nasty creepy-crawly creatures, despite the numerous Pest-Control Charms Filch put on every inch of available space. Worst of the lot were a family of millipedes and a clan of strange insects that looked like a cross between a cricket and a spider.

Draco could never rest peacefully. At night, he sometimes imagined a prickly feeling on his legs, and had to scratch madly at his legs, afraid there might be bugs in his pajama trousers. He tossed and turned, afraid that any moment now a cricket-spider would hop onto his bed. Not even Mr. Snugglekins was much of a comfort, though Draco sometimes used the old bear to smash bugs.

It was a well-guarded Slytherin secret that Draco was terrified of bugs. The Slytherins kept his secret not because they were faithful to Draco; they just didn't want the rest of the school knowing that their fearless leader was in fact a great, blubbering baby.

However, this did not solve the problems of millipedes and cricket-spiders which scared Draco every day.

"Pansy!" he wept one evening, when one such bug was blocking the stairs to the boys' dorm. "There's a big, icky bug in my way! Please smush it!"

"Sorry, Draco, but I'm working on my Herbology essay here," Pansy said. "It'll go away on its own."

No it wouldn't! They never did! Draco turned to Theodore Nott. "Nott, please smush the big, icky bug for me!"

"Sorry, Draco. But these are new shoes. I can't risk getting them gunked up with bug goo."

Desperately, Draco turned to the dim-witted trolls he called his best friends. "Crabbe, Goyle, smush the big, icky bug for me!"

"Heheheh, bug," they laughed stupidly, not quite grasping what was going on.

"I want to go upstairs to my beddy-bye!" Draco wept. "I wish Auntie Bella was here! She'd smash those bugs good!"

"You called?" Bellatrix said, falling from the sky.

"Auntie! Squish the big, icky bug for me!" Draco begged.

"Stand back!" Bellatrix pulled her bug-squishing mallet from nowhere, and brought it down on the bug. SPLOOT. It splattered all over the stairs, and Bellatrix cleaned it up with a wave of her wand.

"Thank you, Auntie!" Draco cried happily. "I love you!" He smothered his auntie with kisses.

"Anything for my neffy-poo," Bellatrix cooed. "Now off to bed, your mother will be angry if I let you stay up!"

"Goodnight, Auntie!" Draco bounded up the stairs.

"Give Mr. Snugglekins a kiss for me!" Bellatrix called, before strolling out of the castle.

Draco planted a smooch on his teddy bear. "That was from Auntie Bella," he said.

"Good. She's hot," Mr. Snugglekins answered.