Chapter 18
His beautiful eyes slit so closely that a knife blade couldn't fit through them. His whole energy focused on the creature in front of him and all the lust-filled thoughts that were running through his mind like a 24 hour marathon day in and day out. His baser animal instincts were slowly taking over the man inhibiting his body. Moving down, he grabbed her by her ankles and threw her over his shoulder.
"Angelus! Put me down! ANGLEUS!" she screamed almost at the top of her lungs. She'd seen him in different moods and his moods would affect how his eyes seemed but she'd never seen him act this, this, soulless before. He had scared her on a few occasions but ever since that first time, she never truly believed that he would ever lay a hand to her. Now, she wasn't so sure.
Kicking open the door to the bedroom he flipped her off his shoulder and onto the bed. Instantly she started to scramble for the door and get away but he shut and locked the door before she could get there. He stood there, in front of the door with a triumphant smirk on his face that Buffy once found herself being turned on by. Not now.
"Let me go!" She demanded of him.
Tisking her and her naivety, Angelus looked at her with a carnal hunger that only he could possess for her. Taking her shoulders in his hands, he looked down on her and she knew what he wanted.
"No," she told him.
"You want it and you know it," he muttered as he moved his lips to her ear lope and nibbled on her ear and moved down to her neck where he knew she would crumble.
She fought him, knew it was SO wrong, but how could it feel SO good? She knew that he would only cause her pain and he was never going to solely commit to just one woman, let alone her. She knew that he'd never be there for her and that if she stayed with him, she'd be going against everything she had worked so hard for, to gain back after having been with Parker.
But why did he have to make it SO hard for her to just say no? He was torturing her in so many ways but the pain was internal and sexual. The two worst ways or torture possible. With external torture you know at some point that the pain will stop. Even if they drag it on, if you just hold on, you'll make it to when it doesn't hurt anymore. With internal and sexual torture, the humiliation and pain stays with you forever. And Angelus was the master of internal and sexual torture.
He had made her feel safe and warm; protected even once upon a time. She had shared some of her darker secrets with him, was willing to give him her heart and what did he do? He threw it in the dirt like a whore that he said she wasn't.
Using all the strength she had within herself she pushed him off of her and watched him stumble backwards a few steps.
"NO!" she screamed.
Going for the door she managed to get it open slightly before his hand shut it again.
"If you wanted to play rough baby, all you had to do was ask," he taunted cockily.
"Get away from me," she warned him with icicles in her eyes that were darting at high speeds right into his heart (if he has one), she chuckled to herself, his eyes that were so intoxicating she could spend forever drowning her soul into them and wouldn't be the wiser, and his dick. The thing about a man is, God gave man a penis and a brain and only enough blood to run one at a time.
"Now baby, why would you want that? I just want to love you," he threw in her face.
Raising her arm to slap him for the insult, he caught her hand this time in anticipation.
"Not this time," he told her lowly, in an almost whispered voice that could have been interpreted as husky but Buffy knew the difference.
It all happened so fast, Angelus kept her one hand in his, locked firmly so she couldn't slap him again and with his other free hand, he tore open her shirt expecting to see her chest. What he found was something that made him see red.
Grabbing the wire that was taped to her stomach he ripped it off of her in one smooth motion, making Buffy flinch from the pain. Her mind was screaming, "OH SHIT! OH SHIT!" over and over, but her traitorous body was screaming for him to fuck her. His body was SO close to hers. He had found the wire and she felt like she needed absolution that only he could give to her. She was so messed up and confused. What in the FUCKING hell did she want?
"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BUFFY?" he demanded of her yelling at her as he shook her violently snatching her other hand in the process.
Faced with the reality of his attitude and mood, she didn't care what her body wanted or her mind wanted, she only knew to follow her instincts and her instincts were telling her to get away from him as fast as she could.
Struggling, wiggling to get away, to yank her wrists out from his grasp, he wasn't budging! His grasp was too strong for her, and he was moving them backwards to the bed.
The next few moments were a blur to Buffy. One second she saw Angelus leering over her, ready to do god knows what to her and the next he was gone.
Sniffling the last few tears up she realized that he wasn't a threat anymore. The relief filled her soul like fresh water in a vase. She looked up and saw Spike there shaking his fist with Angelus on the ground out cold.
"Are you alright?" he asked her.
Looking at Angelus on the ground and back at Spike she told him honestly, "I am now,"
In those few minutes of Angelus finding out that she had betrayed him, and to see how violent and dangerous he became, she finally knew what she wanted. Angelus in her life would always be a danger to her mentally, emotionally and physically. She silently asked herself if she even really felt like she had been in love with Angelus at all. Or was she just addicted to the pain a man like him would cause in her life? To have him out of her sight for that one second made Buffy realize that she didn't need him. She didn't need that kind of guy in her life to be happy. It was a lesson she learned a long time ago with Parker. She just hoped that the next time she decided to get involved with a guy she'd remember it that time. She shrugged believing that what they say is true. Love really can be blind.
TBC…
