Chapter Ten: No Rest for the Pilot

The big Turk worried me slightly. Well, a fucking lot. I was five seconds away from becoming a Cid pancake. But this new one... the woman... Eleanor? Fucking hell, I was always terrible with names. For now, she would be the triple B; bitchy blonde bimbo. For my memories of her were of her big mouth and constant incompetence. Well, for a Turk.

She'd had a few years of training since then.

Of course, my mind had just registered what she'd said. Fucking bitch. "Wait... my bitch?" I replied, unsure exactly of what she was implying. Sure some of the guys had joked about Vin and me once, but that lasted about as long as they could exist without a pole shoved up their ass... which was approximately five seconds, not including the time it took to find said pole. Not like Rocket Town has fucking poles all over the place.

There was a snap and the lights flicked on with blinding clarity. I could actually see them all now, Big Turk was still very scary, BBB was not a BBB in all areas, she'd seemed to fill out pretty well and the look she gave me was eerily competent. "Yes. Your bitch. Or is your head too far up your ass to hear properly?"

Fucking hell... was she implying... that's not very ladylike.

"You've got to be dicking me," I reply looking around for Shera to pop out and say, 'I'm fine and well! Funny joke, huh?', or her ghost to come and scare the shit out of me.

"Could you boys excuse me and the Captain a minute?" Elena asked, crossing her arms under her chest. I was too stunned to even register the nods or the fact that Reno, Rude and Reeve filed out into a side room. After the door had clicked she stepped forward, backing me up against the wall. "I fucking don't feel like playing. And I sure as hell am not going to listen to you poke fun at the ONLY three men in my LIFE who've been more interested in me being safe than smacking me around. I don't know why Reeve let you tag along, I don't know why Re didn't fucking shoot you, but YES. YOUR friends are doing this. MY FRIEND is dead right now because YOURS flipped out. And that? That pisses me off."

"Hell if you wanted to get alone with me, you could have just asked," I replied, strangely unfazed by her rant. Fucking hell, it was almost fun, the way her brown eyes flamed the way they did. But damn... I couldn't think about that. My friends? She suggested more than one in that, and even the idiot that I am could put two and two together.

Surely she didn't mean Shera, though?

She snarled at me and the punch came out of nowhere, right across the jaw. Ok, so she was pretty strong… I'd file that information away. "Yeah, your gods damned bitch is all over Vincent Valentine." She spat on the ground as if the idea disgusted her. "How he could ever fuck a ShinRa scientist is beyond me. But of course, that's something you two had in common…only, not really. If I remember, you only like women too scared to call you on your shit."

Vin was officially on my shit list. That asshole. He knew that... well fuck him.

"The fucking hell are you talking about, woman!" was all I managed to stammer out, "Vin's been away for a year, and fucking hell Shera... and what do you know about my habits!" Shera and... this whole time, gods damned, I needed a fucking drink. And I had the Petite Pitbull trying to rip me a new one.

Wrong thing to say, She yanked me by my collar and brought us eye level. "I have a FUCKING name, Highwind. Elena. If it is too many syllables, call me Elle. Do NOT fucking call me WOMAN you misogynistic asshole." With that I was cast against the wall again. "Vincent and Shera, fucking behind your back. At least that's what it looks like to me. And how can I NOT know about your habits? No fucking wonder she snapped the way you treated her." She took a long breath. "Fuck it, I don't know why I bothered, fucks like you think that if someone has breasts they don't have any mentality."

She stopped and lit a cigarette, then turned the pack to me, actually offering a cig to me?

I was fucking confused. This was NOT how women acted. I was beginning to wonder if Hojo'd started growing his Turks in glass cases along with that fucktard Valentine. Maybe if I made her angry enough she'd turned into a fucking dinosaur or something.

I accepted her cigarette, if only because I no longer existed in the real world.

"Aeris and Tifa were pretty smart," I said with a low tone, "Yuffie was an idiot, but she was a kid. Don't think I haven't dealt with women, and don't you EVER condescend to know what the fuck I've dealt with, Elena." I felt pretty satisfied with myself for the moment. Sure, I might be an asshole, but you don't make fucking generalizations about anybody. She opened her mouth to say something but I managed to cut her off.

"So how exactly do we kill the bastards?" I said. See, I was on a mission, but missions can adapt. I don't think I could kill her or anything, despite it all, but I had a one man shit list at the moment.

"How do you kill something that can kill and maim Turks?" she said, no amount of cynicism spared, "Personally, I'd blow them the fuck up." Sure, that was a gods damned viable solution if you wanted to fry Vin's ass, but if... if she was around... no way in hell would that work.

"No fucking way. You don't even know if anyone other than Necrophilia Walking and Shera are involved," logic, Cid, use your gods given talent for something fucking useful, "Or that Shera is in her right mind. She gets confused sometimes." She narrowed her eyes.

"If someone bigger is involved, you burn the weaklings to smoke them out," she said coldly. Damn, how did Shinra find these people? This woman looked like the damn girl next door fantasy; blonde, young, and deceivingly sweet looking. Who'd have thought she'd say this kind of shit?

"Listen, I know Vin's a nutcase, even on a good day, but Shera's decent," I continued, why the fuck was I in this constant loop, "There has to be a reason for her to be working with him. Maybe she's trying to stop him, maybe—"

"Scarlet was decent too! Under all that shit that Shinra put her through... she was a good person!" She'd thrown the cigarette on the ground, not even fully smoked. What a waste.

"The fucking hell are you shouting for!" I shouted back, and yes, I'm a gods damn hypocrite. Fucking sue me.

She cracked her knuckles, mouth taunt like she was ready to maim me with her words or fist. She did neither.

"I understand that you are a thick headed male with an obsession for dominating," she said in a slow teacher explaining to a child tone, "And that your submissive has run off with the tall dark stranger. But you have to understand... that there might be a possibility that you thought wrong. Or that there's something there that you didn't consider before."

And like a light switch, she turned the tense mood in her face off.

"If we can save her, we will. But if she's the enemy, can you handle that?" Damn it all... I didn't want to be having this conversation. I didn't want to be talking to a fucking Turk. I didn't want her to be looking at me like a person instead of a target. Good and evil... there's no such fucking thing anymore, is there?

Shera is not the villain, the dark sorceress. Hell, she's not even the captured princess. There aren't parts for her kind in storybooks. Shows you what kind of assholes wrote them.

"Could you handle it if one of those guys out there has to die in the process? I won't answer your damn question if you don't answer mine." She blinked, falling out of that warm and near caring front that she put up. This was the Elena I remembered; unsure, and overwhelmed.

"I... I don't know. I'd probably hit the bastards that much harder. I could go on." Her tone became more final as her phrasing ended. Sure, that was a bastard tactic. But, shit, she asks some hard questions.

I was on a mission. A mission.

"If it is the case, may it be gods damn fucking hell quick. If you make her suffer, no matter what she's done, I will have your ass." When did I begin to sound so fucking serious? Makes a man want to start drinking.

"Likewise for any of my men." She held out her hand and smiled. Guess it was time to seal the deal or some shit like that.

I grasped and shook it quick, strong, and brief. I can imagine that when you sign your soul away in blood, you want to drop the pen quickly. Creepy ass shit, this all was. I just hoped that it was worth it.

Gods damn, what a waste it would be if it wasn't.