Alone In My Mind...
Preface
Warning: This is a Preface. Not a prologue. If you don't know the difference. Find a dictionary.
It's purpose is to set the mood, not lead up to the story. Basically, it doesn't mention the characters and you don't need to read it. So, you can save yourself 10 minutes and many uttered oaths if you want and just click that little button the right. The blue one. Otherwise, no flames if you don't like it. I warned you.
You could say I was vengeful. Selfish. Greedy. But I would say I did what needed to be done. There is not much left in the end. A shattered dream, hopes never realized. Like I said--not much, when you consider what's gone. Fear, distress, confusion…disaster.
Many devastating mistakes are made under these.
It is better to have realized what could have been and never achieve it, then to achieve it and lose it due to a moment's indecision. Either way a mark is left. The former is regret. Nothing more, and in time, is forgotten. The latter is deadly.
Once a taste of Eden is given it is not quickly forgotten. And, unless it is forever the longing will continue to writhe inside a person like many surreptitious snakes.
So you see, a person can never truly achieve anything more. Anything achieved almost never equates and certainly never exceeds.
'But, isn't the memory, of even a short time in complete bliss, worth the memory to cherish?' You ask?
A person is always judging. Life vs. Memory. Do you see the dilemma?
For certain, a memory is always the victor. Things seem much sweeter when all the pain is gone and just a fuzzy, happy haze surrounds our past. Which, by the way, is always the case.
A person shall strive and struggle after the memory of a shattered dream but never get another. And, ironical enough, even if life shoved another into their very face they wouldn't notice. So caught up a person would be despairing in their own delusion .
So you see. In this situation there are but two choices. To strive or to give up. But that fact of the matter is. Both are deadly.
You may be wondering, 'Why'? Why did I write this? How is this relevant? Is this just random drabble? Mere listless words drawn on paper to take up space? Alas, that is not so.Like so many times fortune evades we do our best. Yet are continuously dubbed 'Liar'. 'Weak'. Never, not once, are we asked for our reasons. Yet, even if some kind soul were to become curious and ask we wouldn't get told, "Oh how sad!". No. Oh no.
Instead, despite the countless similarities, there would be cries of "Pity! Pity but not forgiveness!" or exclaims of "Unfortunate but not forgiven!" and, sometimes, if we are lucky, even the less desirable, "Unforgivable!".
While all the while, in hundreds of minds little incoherent voices are chirping away. Guilt overrides morals. Morals give way to judgment. Judgment becomes sentencing. And sentencing becomes guilt. A deadly cycle.
And, humorously enough for some reason moral standards raise to impossible heights when it involves someone else's problems. And even if you had previously asked for advice, non was given. People are too caught up in their own meager existence to pay heed to anyone else.
This, and this alone is why I wrote this.
People are stuck to a ridged moral code that many feel only needs to be upheld if some random stranger has done wrong. When it involves an acquaintance. Or, more shockingly, themselves, these codes break down. Crumbling like brick to a horrendous storm.
Plunk…plunk…plunk…
The sound of strict codes breaking. Breaking either to the soft, pliable smell of green law, or the melodious ringing of power.
But I shouldn't be so fast to disclose judgment. No one is without problems. In fact, the saying 'What a tangled web we weave' is in all ways, the most truthful saying imaginable. Let it be said that I begin by setting the facts, not for pity. Oh no. I don't deserve it. And anyways, I don't want to have to return the sentiment.
Instead, before judging. Take a moment and evaluate your life. Be non judgmental. An observer. Most importantly. Be a stranger…
HAH! What fun! Fear unimaginable!
But I digress…
A/N:Ok…I know this is weird. It's my first fic of this type, if you are confused, I'm sorry. I guess go to the next chapter then, if I have it up right now…looks guilty I'm trying to get it up the same time as this one, but it might not be up for a few days afterwards…we'll see.
