CHAPTER 13 – What's Your Name Again?
"Howdy!" Dwayne greeted, as he, Russ, Luis and Ken approached Charlie, who was sitting alone by the front steps of Eden Hall Monday morning.
"Hey! Why so glum, chum?" Russ noticed.
"Linda broke up with me last night," Charlie replied sadly.
"Really?!…" Luis asked, brightening up. Russ smiled. Ken elbowed Luis. "…I mean…why?" he asked trying to sound concerned.
"It just so happened that Violet spread out to anyone who would listen that I took her out again last Saturday to a fancy restaurant and asked her if she could go steady with me if Linda gets out of the picture! So eventually, that story made its way to Linda, she was really furious with me last night, broke-up with me and broke our date for the dance and it's ALL VIOLET'S FAULT!!!" Charlie said in one breath, practically shouting the end of his sentence.
There was a long pause after that, finally Ken spoke. "Why don't you try to talk to Violet and ask her to explain to Linda the truth?"
"I tried. But Linda is so stubborn to listen to me, or to Violet, or to anyone else. We're through. What am I going to do now?! The Valentine's Dance is on Saturday! How can I get a date on such short notice?" Charlie groaned.
"Why don't you just ask Violet? I'm sure she'd be so ecstatic to go with you." Dwayne suggested.
Charlie glared at him. "Why don't you go make a hungry shark happy?"
"Charlie, you sound angry." Dwayne said, not getting what Charlie meant. The other three rolled their eyes.
"No, I'm just delighted that you had come up with that great idea, Dwayne" Charlie said sarcastically.
"Gee, thanks!" Dwayne said, obviously pleased with himself. Charlie stared at him with disbelief.
"Why don't you do what I do, Charlie? Run an ad in the newspaper." Luis said, ignoring Dwayne.
"The Personals?" Ken asked. "I think that could help, Charlie."
"Yeah, man! Almost the whole school had already placed an ad! Why don't you give it a try?" Russ encouraged.
Charlie thought about it for a while. 'Okay, I'll do it!"
* * *
"Minnesota Miracle Man?!" Averman read when Charlie showed them his ad. He chuckled.
"Charlie, isn't that a little wishful thinking? I mean… the last I heard, Coach Bombay is the Minnesota Miracle Man, not you!" Goldberg put in.
"No, you guys! Coach Bombay told me that I'm the real Minnesota Miracle Man back when I had decided to leave the team." Charlie explained, beaming.
Jesse raised his eyebrows. "Yeah, right, Spazway!"
Guy smiled but rolled his eyes. Luis shook his head.
"Whatever you say," Adam added.
Charlie happily collected his ad and marched to the school paper office.
* * *
"That name sounds pretty intimidating, Portman. Aren't you worried?" Fulton asked. He and Portman were discussing their "personals match".
"Nah, that's precisely what I like in a girl, it really makes them more challenging." Portman replied, coolly.
It was already lunchtime and the Bash Brothers were the first ones to get in the Ducks' table. After a few moments, Julie and Connie burst in.
"I met this guy in the personals, his name is Cool Croon Guy, and he is just so amazing! We have so much in common!" Julie was telling Connie when they walked in.
"Cool Croon Guy?" Connie repeated. "What is he, like a singer or something?"
"So he says! Well, not exactly a singer. But he sings." They giggled.
"What is your pen name again?" Connie inquired, when they sat down their table.
"Cute Tough Chick. Pretty lame, huh?" Julie answered.
"No, it's really cool!"
"Wait a minute, Julie, what's your pen name again?" Portman asked.
"Cute Tough Chick?" Julie replied.
"No really?"
"Yeah, really!"
"No way! You're Cute Tough Chick?" Portman asked again.
"Portman! What is it with you if I am?!" Julie asked, confused.
"Nothing! I'm just teasing you." He said.
"Hey, Dude, isn't it…" Fulton started to say.
"C'mon, bro. Let's grab something to eat." Portman dragged Fulton to the lunch line.
Connie and Julie stared at them. "Weird!" They said in unison.
