Chapter 18
Nina stirred, slowly waking up. Well, not that slowly, her mind was awake within a beat. Only her body took a moment longer to come to, her limbs feeling heavy and numb.
She knew where she was before she opened her eyes, squinting against the light, staring at the white-painted ceiling. The hospital. Still. She wondered how much longer.
When she had woken up the first time, they had been standing by her bedside within seconds. Read out her rights to her right away, hardly waiting for the doctor to check if she was even responsive. She had felt dizzy and languid and it had been hard to focus on the voices. But no one had waited for an answer at the question if she had understood her rights. A surveying tug at her cuffs had been all, letting her feel the metal around her wrist, and they had been gone. She surely hadn't minded.
The doctor had been uncomfortable with her, glancing over to the guards by the door every other moment, and if she hadn't been so dazed from the narcosis, she would have sneered at him. Just to see him squirm even more. But she had felt too weak.
After the doctor had left they had just left her to herself and she had tried to piece it together. Not what had happened to her or at the airfield, that part being obvious enough. But she had tried to figure out how much time could have passed since then, wondering what might have become of her arrangements. But she had been out again soon, falling into a deep sleep her body obviously needed.
The second time she had woken up hadn't been much different. The doctor had talked to her again, a CTU agent she had never seen before had explained to her that she would be transported to L.A. the next morning - for further hospitalization in an appropriate facility and, of course, questioning. She had startled him by asking the time as the words in the morning hadn't meant anything to her.
She tried to swallow, her mouth and throat being dry, and closed her eyes again.
"Where were you gonna go?"
Jack. Of course. She opened her eyes again, turning her head to the side his voice had come from.
He was sitting in a chair in the opposite corner of the room, staring at her. He looked better than last time. Cleaner, freshened up, but still tired.
"Where were you gonna go from the airfield?" he asked again, getting up from the chair and taking a few steps across the room. Maybe just to cause her to move her head again to follow him. Hesitant, she did.
"Away," she said with a frightening scratchy voice and the effort of her vocal chords caused her immediately to cough. Consequences of the intubations.
"To meet your client."
She saw him glaring at her and raised her gaze to the ceiling again. What did he want now? Did she really have to deal with him now? Someone would come for her soon. She just wasn't sure who. And she wasn't sure whom she would prefer to show up. She'd really rather be alone now.
"Yes, Jack. To meet my client."
-x-
Why did he even bother? Why was he standing here trying to get answers from her? There were certainly better things he could do with his time.
But he wanted to piece it together.
"And what were you gonna tell him?" he asked, taking another stop towards the bed. "How were you gonna explain that you can't deliver the virus?"
Trying to swallow again, she kept looking at the ceiling, taking her time before she answered.
"I would have referred to you for any complaints," she regained her sarcasm.
"Cut the crap, Nina," he grumbled impatiently. "Why were you suddenly so willing to give up the virus?"
"It might come as a shock to you, Jack, but I have no interest in killing millions of people."
"You know, I actually believe you," he stated, waiting until she looked at him. "As long as you got your ass covered. I'm just not buying that you were willing to risk your life for that of others. No matter how many of them."
She was holding back something. He knew it.
"Well, Jack, you can believe whatever you want and buy or not buy whatever you want," she said with the most indifferent intonation and expression. "Why should I care?"
He clenched his teeth and put his hands around the handrail at the end of her bed, squeezing the metal tightly.
Why you should care? Because you owe it to me. Because you owe me more than I can ever make you pay.
He knew if he let go of the handrail his hands would shoot forward to attack her. To beat her, strangle her. To hurt her. Because that was the only thing he could do to her. It was all he could do.
He didn't even know when the realization had hit him exactly. It had more slowly been sinking in. Slowly but constantly.
His thoughts traveled back to the shed, when he had almost smashed her skull with the spyglasses. Back then he hadn't understood what had made him hesitate at first, even before he had realized he still needed her. Or maybe he had and just refused to see it, struggling with the withdrawal symptoms. It was as simple as it was frightening. He couldn't kill her because it would be too easy on her. It wouldn't make her pay enough, wouldn't make up for what she had done. What he really wanted was not for her to die - but to suffer. He wanted her to hurt like he had hurt, to feel her heart getting ripped out and trampled around on just like he had. And that realization appalled him even more than the thought that he was the kind of guy who wanted to kill someone in cold blood.
But it was true. He had always thought that he was hurting her because he couldn't kill her. But instead it was the other way around: he couldn't kill her because he wanted to hurt her. And he had tried to hurt her. He had tried so hard. But she always came back, she never stayed down long enough, never suffered long enough. And she never would. Because there was no way she could feel what he had felt or go through the same hell he had been through. And was still going through every single day. He couldn't kill her but in the end - he couldn't hurt her enough either. Because he couldn't do to her what she had done to him. Because he couldn't take from her what she had taken from him.
"What do you want, Jack?"
He startled. And didn't know what to say. What did he want?
"Why did you leave the virus behind?"
He was stalling. But he still wanted to piece it together.
"If you have to know: I never had any interest in that virus," she sighed. "Or at least I had no intention to give it to my client."
He stared at her, taken aback by her revelation.
"What then? What intention did you have?"
"You were right, Jack. I had a deal with Amador. We were gonna do the transaction to get the money off of my client's account. He was supposed to walk away with the money, and I was gonna take care of the virus. Then we would have met again a little later and reversed the exchange, only that he would have kept half of the money. As a payment for his...mediation."
Jack shook his head. "And you really believed he was gonna go along with that?"
"It would have been in his interest. His clients would never have heard about it, of course, and he could still have sold the virus to another buyer and would have made some money on the side. And my client would have been after me, not him. It seemed safe."
He sneered.
"We all make mistakes," she added quickly, a faint smile playing around her mouth.
"What about your client?" he asked. "I thought you were so afraid of him?"
"As long as he would have been able to track me down. But not with more than a hundred million dollars on my account. You thought 20 million would be enough to disappear for good? I doubt that but...120...that would have done it."
He couldn't believe she had been trying to pull this off. Not given up until the end. When he had been thinking she was down and beaten. And she would almost have gotten away with it.
"What happened to your client's money?" he asked when the door suddenly opened.
Turning his head around, he saw the same guy again, Lucas, rolling a tray inside with syringes and ampoules.
"Sorry if I interrupt, but I need some blood samples. We have to make sure there's no infection."
"Sure," Jack muttered and let go off the handrail. Taking a deep breath he turned around, taking a few steps away from the bed while Lucas pushed the tray past him.
He was just wondering why the guards hadn't closed the door behind him like they had done earlier when he suddenly felt a sting in his arm. He flew around, trying to grasp his assailer or his weapon but the punch that hit his face made him tumble backwards the same moment he felt the drug in his blood. He tried to reach for his gun but he was way too slow and when Lucas came at him again, he just tried to duck, knowing already he was gonna be out in less than five seconds.
-x-
Nina had seen him coming in and had looked up, but she hadn't reacted. What could she do anyway? Watching Jack struggling a few seconds more and then passing out, she sighed and tilted her head back on the pillow.
She closed her eyes. She had been afraid he was gonna come for her.
She heard the footsteps as he came walking towards the bed and then she felt him standing over her. She had hoped he wouldn't find her.
She shrugged and looked up at him. "You didn't bring me flowers."
He grinned. "Left them in the car. Thought it might be a bit obvious."
She smiled sadly when she felt his hand on hers. "Are you out of your mind? What are you doing here?"
"Well, I thought I was just gonna drop by and say hello. But now that I see you're awake and well, I guess I'm just gonna take you with me."
"You're insane," she retorted angrily. "How did you even get in?"
"Hey, I grew up around here, remember? I still know some people," he explained with a wink.
"Get out of here," she hissed. Before it's too late.
"That's exactly what I had in mind. Ready to go?"
She glared at him but then lowered her eyes. She had to stay calm.
"Did you empty the account?" she asked.
"Emptied it and closed it the moment the money arrived. Even if your client knows it was there, he can't trace it anymore."
"Good," she stated. "Then take the money and disappear. If you brought other people into this, they'll find out who you are."
"I don't care," he laughed, "wasn't that the point all along? To disappear for good?"
"Yes, but in case you haven't noticed: things didn't exactly go as planned."
"I noticed." Another smile. "That's why I'm here."
She wanted to object, but he raised his hand to silence her, placing it on her lips.
"You're not the only one with a smart head, you know. Even though I have to admit yours is by far prettier than mine."
"Look at me," she wanted to yell but her voice failed her. "I can't walk, I can't even sit up. There'll be security everywhere. We wouldn't make it out of this room, let alone this hospital."
"Just relax," he tried to calm her. "I got it all figured out. Now - do you remember what you told me before you left?"
She tried to shake her head and gave him another glare, but he insisted again: "Do you remember what you told me before you left?"
"Yes," she growled, and he smiled again.
"Good. Then relax. Everything's gonna be alright, okay?"
She drew a sharp breath but gave up, realizing it was hopeless. He wouldn't let her convince him to go and she was too weak to fight him. Besides, what did she have to lose?
"Alright," she hissed. "But if you're gonna get yourself killed, I swear I'm gonna come after you."
He laughed at her and shook his head. "No, you wouldn't." He laid his palm at her cheek. "But that's okay, I would wait. One day even you'll have to go."
He glanced at his wristwatch, his expression turning serious. "We got ten minutes until the next check-up. I took care of the guards on this floor, but as you annotated - there are more of them in the rest of the building." He gave her a meaningful look. "Let's get out of here."
"How?" she exclaimed when he disengaged her from the machines and packed the drip onto her bed. "I got the keys to the maintenance elevator and the basement," he explained. "There's an ambulance waiting for us, and I took the liberty to order us a plane with medical facilities and a doctor on board."
"They'll know we're gone before we get there, and they'll check every airport and every airfield in the area." This couldn't work. He would get them both killed.
"I know. That's why we're not gonna take the plane." He moved around the bed and disengaged the brakes. "Nine minutes. Now, do you wanna debate me on this or can we just leave?"
"You're insane," was all she managed to say.
"I know," he sighed. "I learnt to accept it."
He pushed the bed towards the door but paused again when they passed Jack's unconscious body, still lying where he had let him slump down.
"What about him?" he asked, and she could tell by his voice that he was hoping for a certain answer although he abstained from any comment. She knew his point of view anyway.
"How long will he be out?" she asked, looking down at Jack.
"At least another twenty minutes."
"Just leave him," she decided, trying to shake the feeling that she would regret it, just like last time she had spared Jack's life, and the times before.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," she sighed, thinking he shouldn't ask her one more time. "If we make it out of here, he won't bother us again." And if they didn't leave now, she might still change her mind.
He simply nodded and pushed her out into the hallway, but she could sense his relief. A part of her wondered what he would have done if she had decided otherwise.
