Chapter eleven: Words kids shouldn't learn in kindergarten

Edward plugged Mango's ears as he hastily walked the kids away from the room. He could still hear Coniniaue yelling at Roy;

"YOU $#$! $#ING &#HOLE! WHY THE $& DID YOU EVEN COME TO SEE ME IF YOU KNEW YOU WERE GOING TO YELL AT US, YOU GOD&# PERVERTED GIRL &ER!"

"Let's hurry, kids… And get outside into the air…" Edward muttered, pushing the kids onward.

"AND ANOTHER THING! WHEN THE DID YOU GET A SON? I KNEW YOU WOULD ALWAYS GO TOO FAR WITH A WOMAN! $#$ING #$&!"

The yelling finally stopped when Edward got the kids outside. "Listen, kids, I want you to never ever use any of those words your mother called Roy, okay?"

"Yes, daddy!" Kiwi smiled.

"Alrighty Mr. Elric." Roy shrugged.

Coniniaue poked her head out a window. "You can come in now!" She called down to them.

Back inside

Roy was silent in his chair. He didn't know seventeen-year-old girls had such colorful vocabularies. His little son, of course, climbed onto his lap and hugged him. "Daddy!"

"'Daddy?'" Roy repeated. His eyes became starry. "I'M A FATHER NOW! THIS IS GREAT! WE HAVE TO GET A DOG AND A CAT AND A BIG HOUSE AND LOTSA STUFF AND LOTSA MONEY SO WE CAN BUY THE STUFF AND…"

"Roy? Shut up. Please."

"AND WE NEED TO GET YOU A TOTALLY AWESOME ROOM AND A PET AND…" He looked at Coniniaue and Edward, who were just stared at him. Suddenly he was on his knees. "CONINIAUE! EDWARD! Would you let Roy Jr. stay at your house for a while until I can get us a bigger house?"

"Well sure, Roy." Coniniaue smiled. "Kiwi and Roy will get along great…"

"I'm sure they will… Oh, and something struck me as odd. Have you ever wondered why King Bradley hasn't charged you for fraternization?"

Coniniaue and Edward looked at each other. Edward handed Coniniaue Mango and shrugged. "I dunno. Maybe because we got married on our own time? I mean, you go out with Hawkeye, don't you?"

Roy blushed. "Yeah, so?"

"So isn't THAT fraternization?"

"… I don't know."

A month later

Coniniaue had left the hospital and took three weeks off to stay with Mango, but soon had to go back to work. She left the children with Winry and Pinako, who took good care of them.

She reported directly to Mustang's office. "HIYA, ROY!" She said cheerfully, bursting through the door with Edward. "What now?"

"A murder. We need you to look into it, okay?"