I screwed up. Okay, this is REALLY chapter fourteen, because I TOTALLY forgot to add a chapter. And now you're wondering how Coniniuae had Mango, and how Kiwi's dream ended, right? Sorry. 'Sweet kisses after ten months' is up now!
Chapter thirteen: Amazons
"Wait! Rahcknopholianne!" Roy burst out of his office. "I challenge you!"
Rahckno laughed. "Silly man no match for Rahcknopholianne! Rahcknopholianne martial arts master!"
"Roy Mustang alchemy master!" Roy retorted.
"Hah! Goddaughter Coniniaue better alchemist than you ever be!" Rahckno replied, brushing him off airily. "Alchemy man no match for Rahcknopholianne!"
"My name is ROY for the second time!" Roy protested.
"Whatever. Roy man is in for lots of hurt if he challenge Rahcknopholianne." Rahckno laughed.
Roy pulled on his gloves. "That is no way to speak to a military officer." He growled dangerously.
"What you talking, dummy?" Rahckno asked, outraged. "Rahckno be Queen of Amazon tribe! Rahckno not get that way over night!"
Roy froze, and looked at her nervously. "'Amazon tribe?'"
"Yes! Amazon tribe! Coniniaue an Amazon too! So be her mother! And her sister! And every other female relative on her mother's side!" Rahckno sniffed.
"Aunt Rahckno…" Coniniaue sighed, walking out. "I told you not to tell!"
Edward followed, looking at the tattoo on Rahcknopholianne's leg. "Hm…"
She knelt by his wife and pulled up her pant leg.
"Edward!"
"Shut up! I'm working!" He squinted. He could see the very faint outline of a bright red dragon. "Why didn't I notice this before?"
"Because short man too busy making…"
"Aunt Rahcknopholianne!"
"I'M NOT SHORT! WHO ARE YOU CALLING A BEAN?"
"It true!" She glared at him. "And now short violent man Rahcknopholianne's son-in-law!"
Edward stared at her. "Hell… Does that mean… I belong to an Amazon tribe now?"
"Yes! Short violent man soon be KING of Amazon tribe!"
"Hey wait!" Roy glared at her. "If I beat you, you have to make me your husband, correct? Then I'D be the King!"
"Roy man be right. But I step down from position and give to Coniniaue. And you be Coniniaue's father."
Roy and Coniniaue stared at each other nervously. "I would be so proud! To have a seventeen year old state alchemist for a daughter! Not to mention her four-year-old baby brother!" Roy beamed.
Coniniaue bashed the back of his head with a metal hand. "In your dreams. I'd rather die than be your daughter. Plus, living with all those strong, beautiful women in the Amazon village would SURE be good for you. Rahcknopholianne would divorce you the second you talk to a woman."
"Oh well! We fight on the parade ground tomorrow at two!" Roy skipped off.
"I wonder how Riza will take this…"
