11

Hello everyone! Look, I'm still alive! Sorry its taken so long to update. I graduated from college! Yay! But that meant I had to move back home (because I have no money) and I'm looking for a real job. So I've been busy. Plus I lost my disks for a while. But I'm still working on this story and plan to finish it! So don't lose hope if you like it.

Since last chapter was so fluffy, I decided to go with a less fluffy POV this time…Sanzo. This will also let me add some more Saiyuki.

Disclaimer: I still don't own FMA or Saiyuki. I did just buy Weiss Kruez on DVD! Sorry, I know that doesn't have anything to do with anything, but I had to share with people who might get how cool that is and how excited I am (it hasn't got here yet, I bought it on E-bay, and its killing me!). My family just says 'that's nice'.

Warning: Sanzo, so language. That's about it.


Ch. 7

Icy Violent Violet

Piercing my heart with those eyes…

I'm sent to eternity over and over.

--'Love or Dead?' Sanzo character study, Saiyuki, book 3

Fuck. The blonde brat and the smug general were stupid enough to fall off a cliff because of some spikey-haired, shape-shifting, skort-wearing freak, and now Goku was making like a bloodhound to track them down, so, of course, he had to go too. It had been quite some time since they'd been to a town, the soldiers were grumbling, that perverted kappa (1) was looking at him funny (if the cockroach(2) didn't get laid regularly he got desperate, but it would be inconvenient to shoot him until necessary), and, to top it all off, HE WAS ALMOST OUT OF CIGARETTES! Genjo Sanzo was not a happy camper.

It had only been a day since the last battle, when the diminuative alchemist and General Mustang had fallen from the cliff, but it had been a very long day. The foreigners had promptly freaked out and Hakkai had been especially distressed—which meant for a whole lot of 'oh dears' and silent angst. Well, most of the foreigners had freaked out. That blonde woman—Hawkeye?—had kept her cool. With a couple of well-placed bullets, shot with skill Sanzo respected, she had her people under control and a search party formed. The search party consisted of most of the people of Mustang's little group. The one who stood out was the tall blonde kid, Al, who was panicking much like Hakkai—very politely and considerately. The missing blonde kid's brother, or something. Goku had offered to scent them out, and volunteered Sanzo to come along, and, of course Hakkai wouldn't be left behind. It was surprising how close he had become to Ed. Despite his friendliness, Hakkai truthfully got close to very few people. And, finally, Gojyo had tagged along too. He thought that Sanzo didn't realize that he spent the time alternating between watching Hawkeye's ass and his own. Just one touch, and Sanzo would forget all about what the aspects (3) said.

What the fuck was up with Gojyo's horniness, anyway? It was as if the man needed sex like food or something. Celibacy was one of the few priestly virtues (4) that Sanzo practiced, and he'd never found it that hard. Which was why Gojyo's attentions were particularly irritating. Of course Sanzo had been hit on before, but the constant attention was more than he was used to. Most people backed off after a well-placed glare, insult…gunshot. At first, Gojyo had too. But he must be getting some kind of tolerance to it, because lately he just laughed all off the above off. The attention was giving Sanzo a weird feeling. His skin felt heavy, hot, as if Gojyo's gaze were palpable. It was disturbing.

They'd been traveling quite a while and Sanzo was almost ready to take out another smoke. He'd had to ration his cigarettes (dammit!), and it had been a while since he'd last had one. Luckily Goku had picked up a scent (5) a while ago, and so the foreigners were panicking less. Still, things were a little tense. Along with worrying about the boy, Hakkai was also worried about Jeep. They'd had to leave him alone with the soldiers because Hakkai didn't want him to change form in front of them yet, and he couldn't follow them in jeep form.

Yes, both groups were still keeping secrets from each other. For instance, the foreigners were being very cagey about the shape-shifter. And they'd chosen not to explain about jeep or that if Goku and Hakkai lost their power limiters, they'd probably go insane and kill them all. Little things like that.

They'd worked their way carefully down the crumbly limestone cliffs before following Goku downstream as he sniffed the air, searching for a scent. They'd been lucky, the two missing foreigners apparently got out of the river on the same side of the stream. They were now following Goku away from the stream into the thickly wooded mountainous area. Or an area that had been mountainous at one time. Long years of erosion had worn once grand mountains into rocky hills. Most likely the two missing people had taken up residence in one of the many caves hidden in the rocks. If they were lucky, they'd been found by neither youkai nor shape-shifters. In skorts.

Sanzo trudged through the thick undergrowth behind the group, trailed only by Gojyo, who really was an ass man, apparently. Every time he looked at the group of foreigners, his respect for the blonde woman, Hawkeye, went up another notch. She deftly kept her people together and cogent while comforting Al, yet still managed to look crisp and neat. Hakkai was hiding his worry behind a pleasant façade and carefully checking up on everyone, carrying water battles like he was the group's denmother. Goku looked rather like a dog, sniffing the air, vegetation, and ground, following the scent trail. Like a dog, he'd expect a big treat and a lot of praise when they found the missing people. Well, he'd deserve it Sanzo admitted grudginly. Sanzo was not one given to praising others. Nor did he care to be praised himself.

Looking back a Gojyo, he saw that the man's gaze was once again fixated on his ass. Damn. He should have worn the robe. He'd left his priestly robes behind to trail through the thick underbrush because he did not want it to get torn and snagged. He'd already had to patch it up far too many times thanks to claws and nails and teeth and a million other hassles. But that left him in only his tight black pants, top, and armwarmers, which left his body much more exposed than usual. And Gojyo was taking advantage of the view. Sanzo suppressed a shiver with irritation. It was bad enough that Gojyo was looking at him like he was lunch, but he would not allow himself to react to the predatory gaze.

Luckily for Sanzo the group approached a cave within the hour and found Ed and Mustang waiting for them there. The boy looked all right, though he was wearing only his tight black pants and an oversized white shirt that must have been Mustang's. The general was dressed in his usual uniform sans said white shirt, his open coat revealing a tight tank-top. Sanzo left the curiosity at finding the boy in the general's shirt to those members of their party with more prurient sensibilities—aka, Gojyo. When the two emerged from the cave, smiling in welcome, the relief and gaity of their friends was tangible. Al ran forward excitedly shouting.

"Ed! Brother!" Alright, so that settled the 'are they brothers' question. There really was a strong resemblance, despite the height difference.

Most of the others, including Hakkai, also hurried forward to greet the found pair. Goku looked back at Sanzo, pride shining in his eyes, and Sanzo gave a reluctant nod of acknowledgement. From most people it would be considered faint praise, but from Sanzo it was enough to make Goku's face light up in a huge smile. Sanzo would never understand why the boy cared so much for him. Sure, he'd saved the boy, but that was only to shut him up (6). He knew that he'd not been a kind guardian, but Goku happily shrugged his angst and anger aside and acted like he was everything important and good in the world. It was baffling.

After a few moments of celebration, the party turned and headed back to the campsite. Sanzo hung back from the celebrants. Part of the reason he hung back, the reason he would have given if asked, was to look out for youkai. The others were so overjoyed to find Ed and Mustang alive and well that they were no longer paying attention to the forest around them, and they still had enemies out there. The real reason he hung back, though, was to avoid the happiness, and the closeness that such happiness brought. The last thing he wanted was to become part of the big happy family. He was not that close to anyone, even Goku, even Hakkai. He'd learned long ago that closeness brought only pain (7). Without great love, there can be no great heartbreak, without friendship no betrayal. He lived for himself and he would die for himself, not for the people, or the gods, or friends.

For a moment, Sanzo was so caught up in his silent reverie that he did not notice that he was not the only one to hang back. Gojyo followed, slightly behind him to the right. The kappa, for once, was not looking at his ass, not looking at him at all. Instead he was gazing forward thoughtfully. Thoughtfully, huh? Not likely. Sanzo smirked to himself, silently calling the redhead's mental capacity into question.

As if he read Sanzo's mind, Gojyo looked at him that moment. For a minute his eyes were solemn, dark, as if he thought thoughts that put the weight of the world on his shoulders. But that look lasted but a small bit of time before a wry, lecherous look came over the kappa's face. Gojyo's eyes traced up and down Sanzo's body, appreciating the clingy clothes and slender, taut body. Sanzo was perhaps a bit too thin, but otherwise nearly perfect, like a dream. Sanzo narrowed his eyes, glaring in response to the overtly sexual look. Yes, Gojyo clearly was becoming immune to his threats and glares. Sanzo might have to actually hurt him soon.

"You could go up there, you know. Most of them wouldn't care, but Hakkai'd be happy and Goku'd be ecstatic." The redhead gave Sanzo a knowing look, like he knew that the priest would not go and why. Sanzo gritted his teeth.

"Hakkai's happy anyway, and Goku's always ecstatic. I am surprised you're not up there. I see several attractive blondes you could be feeling up."

"Right now I only see one attractive blonde, but I don't think we're at 'feeling up' yet." Gojyo smirked at Sanzo, risking death.

For a moment Sanzo was speechless. He felt his eyes widen, hating the evidence of his surprise. Gojyo had not hit on him so blatantly since they'd first met and he'd nearly shot the kappa. At the moment, he was regretting the almost. What he hated even more than the implied disrespect, than the blatant sexual interest, was his own body's reaction. The hair on the back of his neck stood up, his pulse quickened, and he felt warm. He hid the reaction rather well, but could not hide the blush that rose on his cheeks. It was faint and on most would not have shown, but Sanzo's porcelain skin was so fair that the blush shown as clearly as the painted rose on a doll's cheek. Gojyo's smirk widened into a full-on leer.

"Keep looking at me like that and the only thing you'll be feeling is a bullet between the legs," Sanzo growled dangerously. He slipped his hand behind his back to where his gun was resting in the waistband of his pants. Normally he kept it in a hidden pocked in a sleeve in his robes, but, since he wasn't wearing his robes, he'd had to find a new place. He pulled the gun out, fingering it lovingly, not caring if Gojyo saw.

Gojyo chuckled softly, wandering closer to Sanzo. In their distraction, they'd let the others pull far enough ahead to give them privacy. No one would hear their conversation.

"I know you don't want to admit it, but you're a human being Sanzo. You need to eat, sleep, and fuck, just like the rest of us. You need to touch, to have friends and lovers. And one day, you'll have to admit it. You'll have to admit to having a heart. And I intend to be there when you do. But for now, I'll settling for you admitting to a libido."

Sanzo's heart jumped a bit as Gojyo's voice became even deeper and huskier than usual. Dammit, the man was right, something Sanzo had no intention of ever admitting. Sanzo thought he'd left such…reactions…behind when he'd left adolescence, but apparently not. He didn't know what it was about Gojyo—the man annoyed the hell out of him—but, at the moment, some part of him wanted to give in to the dark promise in that crimson gaze. Instead he turned quickly, jerking his arm up in a smooth, practiced motion, and put his gun directly between Gojyo's eyes, resting its muzzle on his skin.

"Listen to me now, Gojyo," Sanzo's voice was dangerously soft. "I do not want you. I do not want to have sex with you. I will kill you if you keep pushing me." Each lie was emphasized with a slight push of the gun and the icy violent violet of Sanzo's eyes.

Gojyo gazed back into Sanzo's eyes for a moment, seeing the uncertainty and fear below the ice…then he backed off, holding his hands up in a gesture of surrender. He'd let Sanzo lie…for now. But not forever.

The treck back to the main camp was much quicker than the one to the cave. Rather than walking back down to the river, they quickly found the main road and followed it back. Despite Sanzo's caution, nothing happened on the trip. Gojyo stayed back with Sanzo though, to watch the foliage for enemies. He wouldn't leave the priest alone or the party unprotected.

When they reached the camp a cry of happiness was put up by the rest of the foreigners. Particularly loud was the very large blonde general, Armstrong. Much to their consternation, he picked up both Ed and Mustang at once, twirling around happily. Mustang put up with it with a slightly peeved but mostly tolerant expression, while Ed complained and shouted for the big man to put him down. The rest of the night was spent in a party atmosphere, the whole group too excited to worry about enemies or ambushes. Which, of course, set Sanzo on edge even more.

It would be hard to say what bothered him more—the complete disregard for safety by supposed military men, or the jubilant party atmosphere—but he was thouroghly peeved. No one seemed to mind much as he sat by himself. Goku was used to his moods and Gojyo had shaken his strange mood from earlier and joined the celebration, dancing with a pretty young female liutenant and an equally pretty young male private. He seemed to have found beer somewhere, and was past tipsy well on his way to drunk. As Sanzo sat brooding, Hakkai joined him.

Though Hakkai was overjoyed to have Ed back, he didn't like parties any more than Sanzo. He was more the type to enjoy a quiet evening by the fire with a few close friends. Sanzo…well, Sanzo never really seemed to enjoy anything, but he preferred solitude and quiet. Hakkai worried about giving him too much solitude in which to brood.

"Hello Sanzo," Hakkai greeted in his usual soothing tones, good humor restored by their success today. "Can I get you anything?"

"Hello. No, I don't want anything." Sometimes Hakkai's tendency to act like a motherhen or a servant annoyed Sanzo. Right now he just wanted to be alone. But Hakkai's presence was acceptable. The man knew how not to make himself a huge nuisance, something Goku had yet to learn. Gojyo knew, too, but enjoyed being a nuisance.

"I am glad we found them. I was worried, especially for Ed. He seems to have some sort of medical condition." Sanzo raised his eyebrows at this. He was unaware anything was wrong with the boy. If anything, Ed seemed very healthy.

"Oh, I know it doesn't show much, but the others treat him a little carefully sometimes, and he was very weak and tired after the first ambush." Hakkai felt a little guilty about sharing something Ed clearly did not want everyone to know, but he knew that Sanzo would tell no one. After all, Sanzo had kept Hakkai's secrets for years. Many people wondered why kind, selfless Hakkai was so close to cold, distant Sanzo. What they didn't realize was how much Hakkai owed Sanzo—for saving his life and accepting him (8). Not many people would accept Hakkai if they knew his secrets, but Sanzo had never judged him. He also liked to think he read Sanzo better than most people. As cold as he acted, Sanzo cared about them all and was a good person in general. He didn't really want to be, but he was. Sanzo was just in so much pain…

"Hm." Sanzo didn't have any real comment about the boy's health. He hadn't slowed them down much yet (at least prior to falling off a cliff), and had actually been a great help trying to figure out the gates. Between Ed, Al, and Sanzo they'd learned a lot about them, and would hopefully be able to close them one day soon. Whatever the gates were about, they were somehow helpful to their enemies and so must be destroyed.

"I know you said you didn't want anything, but I thought you might like some tea and soup. I could make you some." Hakkai didn't want to annoy Sanzo, but the man hadn't eaten anything since that morning. Sanzo had a bad habit of forgetting to eat. Hakkai was happy when Sanzo grunted his assent.

They sat at the edge of the camp in jeep, gazing into the night, enjoying the solitude and tea. Ed probably would have joined them, but couldn't sneak away from the party…his brother in particular. They sat there, separate from the others but not lonely with each other's company, until the party had died down and the stars stood out bright against the black sky.

Exhuasted from worry, searching, and partying, the majority of the camp fell into a weary sleep at about midnight. No one noticed when Private Jeremy Landis, the pretty young man Gojyo'd spent a good bit of the night dancing with, woke up with a full bladder and wandered off into the brush to relieve himself. No one heard the slight scuffle of a struggle ended all too quickly. No one noticed if Private Landis smiled a little more broadly than usual the next morning, or laughed a little too much. No one noticed if he stared at Ed a little too much the following morning, or if he had his eye on Sanzo's sutra. And no found Private Landis' body hidden under dead leaves ten feet from the campsite for a long, long time.


This is the little information corner for those who aren't familiar with Saiyuki. If you know it, you might want to skip this part. Contains spoilers from the manga.

(1) Saiyuki is actually based on an ancient Chinese legend about the monkey king named Goku (incidentally, he is the inspiration for Goku on DBZ, hence the tail), a virtuous monk (ha!), a pig (that they somehow translated into Hakkai), and a water demon or kappa (Gojyo). When they refer to Gojyo as a "perverted kappa" it's a reference to the legend and the fact that Gojyo's, well, a lech.

(2) Gojyo's hair is long and very red and its got two pieces always sticking up from the front (like Ed's antenna in the middle of his bangs part). They really do look like some antenna, and so the others call him cockroach as an insult.

(3) The three aspects are kind of like liasons between Heaven (or Gaiden) and the priests. They are the ones who told Sanzo to go on this quest in the first place, and they told him to take Goku, Hakkai, and Gojyo with him.

(4) He cusses, smokes, drinks, gambles, and, oh yeah, kills people!

(5) Goku's not human, but he's not really a youkai either. He's a heretic, a creature born from the rocks of the Earth itself. He's really powerful, and has super sharp senses. He has to wear a demon limiter (his gold crown) to keep his powers under control. When he takes it off he's much stronger, but tends to go insane and try to kill everyone. FYI, the only one who's really 100 human is Sanzo. He has very strong spiritual powers and can use the sutras, which are also very powerful. He's also a very good shot. Hakkai used to be human, but there's an old legend that if you bathe in the blood of a thousand youkai, you'll become a youkai yourself. Apparently it's true, as Hakkai found out. He's also very powerful, and wears a demon limiter (ear cuffs) to keep his powers under control. The power limiters also protect them from the minus wave, which is the reason all the rest of the youkai have gone homicidal. Gojyo is a half-breed, half human and half youkai. He's stronger and faster than most humans, but not as powerful as Goku or Hakkai. His blood-red hair and eyes are marker characteristics that let the world know he's a half-breed.

(6) Goku committed a crime against heaven (I'm not sure what) and was locked into a cave for 500 years (his memories locked away), where all he could see was the sky. He was alone all that time. (In book 7 there was a sad little side story about a bird that came and kept him company, and how he cried when the bird died). When Sanzo was a boy, out on his own, he heard a voice calling to him. He eventually followed the voice to the mountain when he was a young man/older teen and found and freed Goku. The first thing Goku noticed about him was his hair, which was 'like the sun'. Sanzo went up the mountain to knock the owner of the annoying voice in the head, but when Goku looked up at him like that, he couldn't. They've been together (not in a hentai way) ever since.

(7) As an infant Sanzo was discovered floating in a river by Komyou Sanzo. Komyou saved him and raised like a son. Even as a child Sanzo was not very happy or open, but he did love Komyou. So when Komyou died protecting him, right in front of him, it was a big blow that he never really recovered from. Ever since, Sanzo has tried to avoid becoming close to anyone (I say tried because he really does care about Goku, Hakkai, and Gojyo, even if he would never admit it).

(8) Hakkai killed a lot of people in his home village after they gave his sister (who was also his lover) to a clan of pillaging youkai. He also destroyed the whole youkai clan, who raped and hurt his sister (she killed herself because they got her pregnant). That was the thousand youkai he killed that ended up turning him into a youkai, as well. Sanzo was given the task of hunting him down and bringing him to the three aspects for judgment. He did so and then spoke for Hakkai, pleading for mercy for him, even though Hakkai did not ask for it. Mercy was granted.


Sorry there wasn't a lot of action in this chapter, but there will be more soon! Hope you like this chapter.

Gallactica1: Glad you liked last chapter. Thought it'd be a popular one. I'm just so happy that people like my story that I'm glad to respond to all my reviews! You'll see more of Roy and Ed next chapter, and I hope I can keep up the characters! Thanks for reading!

Grasshopper: Glad to see you're still reading! I'm glad you liked the hair bit…its very sensual to play with your lover's hair, or have them play with yours. I thought it'd be a nice way to break the ice. I couldn't have them go all the way through without an angst attack, though, not the way I've been playing up the Ed-torture! Plus it leads nicely into that hurt-comfort thing you mentioned. As for the crying thing…every time I hear a little kid really cry, not just attention-getting, but really cry, I notice that. I remember crying like that when I was a kid, but I rarely do anymore. I think its one of the things we lose when we grow up that we really shouldn't—really crying is a lot more healing than the smothered, muffled way an adult cries. So I thought I'd put that in. And, of course, the lemon had to be sexy without being NC17. I hope I pulled that off—it would suck if a FF admin was looking around and decided that the scene was too racy for an M rating. I liked that last line, with the moth-fire metaphor, too. I was really on a role and feeling poetic. Couldn't do that too much in this chapter—Sanzo uber-smart, but not poetic, at least, not pretty-poetic. I'm trying to do Envy as a sexy, creepy villain that makes all kinds of shivers run up your back…like Muraki in Yami no Matsuei. I agree that the right amount of angst rocks. No angst and I'm not interested, but too much angst and I want to kill myself. Please let me know if I cross the line into whiney! I really don't want to do that! I'm glad you like Ed, you'll see more of him next chapter. And I think I will update Envy's outfit! Glad you don't mind waiting, I'll try to get chapters out as quickly as I can! See ya next time -! (I always look forward to reading your reviews, you right nice, specific ones!)

JMJV: As you can see, the rest of the cast has returned! I'm glad you liked the fluff. I love angsty stories, but all angsty stories need some fluff or its too much! The proper angst-fluff diet is necessary for both the fanfic writer and reader! Keep on reading!

Terra89: Glad you liked chapter 6! I liked it too -. I love yaoi—I was happy when I started reading manga and fanfics and found out I wasn't the only one. But its not all I read. I like non-yaoi stories as well, though I tend to prefer a male lead character. I don't know why, most female leads don't catch me, they are too girly or written like the author has something to prove. But I still like non-yaoi, and I like reading fanfiction that turns non-yaoi into yoai evil grin! I'll update as frequently as I can! See ya!

Ranger: Glad to know you're still reading! Feel free to drop me a line even if you don't have much to say! I'm glad you like the characterizations. I haven't seen the Saiyuki anime, so this is based on the manga and its kinda twt, though I've read through book 7, Saiyuki Gaiden (its really good), and part of Saiyuki Reloaded (found them online). I know it sucks how you buy a movie when it comes out, and then they put it on sale or release a director's cut or something! I can't really afford best buy anymore, but you can find a lot of cheap anime on E-bay. I only paid 24.50 total for the entire series of Weiss Kruez in a collectors box. You might want to check out their site for your future anime needs. (I know I bought a series called Tsukihime from Best Buy, the first DVD was only 20.00, but the 2nd and 3rd are 30!). Anyways, I'll keep writing, so look for future chapters.

Lazeralk: I'm glad you like it! I think a lot of people have missed Red West because this is such a big fandom and its growing so rapidly. I can't believe its already at the point where you can choose characters and stuff! I started reading FMA here months ago when there were only like 500 fics total! I love Roy/Ed, they are so cute when they tease eachother! Ed's automail is cute, but I want him to get his arm and leg back. I owed him that after I let Envy torture him. I haven't seen any other FMAxSaiyuki either. I'll keep writing, so I hope you'll keep reading!

Kurome Shiretsu: I like Roy/Ed interaction too! I don't know why, but I like the oversized shirt thing. Something very sexy about that to me. And I couldn't leave Ed all upset, could I? Besides, Roy's gonna need to know how to comfort him, Ed's not gonna get over all his issues overnight! As you see, the rest of the cast is back! I wanted to go Sanzo POV for this chapter because he's my favorite Saiyuki character, plus he's not at all fluffy, and the last chapter was fluffy, so it'll be a nice contrast! I know that realistically Ed should have gotten sick, but I don't want him to, so we'll just say that Roy got him…ahem…warm in time. Anyway, please keep reading. You're another reviewer who consistently gives me great, specific reviews. Ja ne!

Climax: Sorry it took so long for the update! Glad you liked the chapter. We all know that Roy and Ed just had to get together eventually! You're right, I'd like to see a pic of Roy's expression when he and Ed make love…that'd be sexier to me than a full on nude pic. As for the perversion…well, that's what fanfiction is all about…getting to do what you want with the characters! Glad you're still reading! Ja ne!

MystWynd: Glad you like the story! I was watching FMA and I thought that the stories were very different, but had a very similar tone. They came together rather naturally for me. So I'm glad another fan of both series like the way they're coming together as well! Thank for the compliment on my writing style. Keep reading! See you next time you review!

Tsunamisiren3264: Glad you like! I haven't decided how much Ed will tell the Sanzo group. He'll have to tell them some, since some of the sins are involved…right now I'm leaning towards telling everything, at least to Sanzo and Hakkai, since they've also got angsty pasts. What do you think? I hope you keep reading! Thanks for reviewing!

Senna Robbins: I'm glad you like! I'll update as frequently as I can! Thanks for reviewing!

Cyblade Silver: Hi! Glad you like! Thanks for reviewing, and I'll update as soon as possible!

Meemee: Sorry the updates are taking so long, I'll keep them up as much as possible! Thanks for reading!

If anyone reviewed and I did not reply, please let me know so I can fix it!