A/N: Double shifts suck. Really. I'm back with morepoker nonsense. Why, you ask? Well...um...heck, I don't know why either. Anyway, a big thank you to:

Cahos1057

Marinadaearthgoddess

Sakina the Fallen Angel: (I'll try to send you a site, more Yami quips are coming!)

Setine (strip poker? If I did that, I would probably have to post this somewhere else…it would be that perverted. Seriously.)

Austin

TrueYamisgirlfriend (I tried to email you the rules from a site, but it didn't work for some reason)

Shy and LeighC (I just love you two.)

Feebeefi

Satra

Telecoi (I don't know if the disclaimer applies to reviews or not)

LadyPhoenix99 (You flatter me, friend. Thanks)

Kikoken (Thanks again for the advice, I'm probably going to try and clean up that mess I made in the last chapter soon)

I'm going to apologize in advance if this chapter sucks. I've been going through some very hurting things in the family, so I would be honest to say that I haven't been in the mood to write comedy lately. I hope that I can suck it up and put together a good chapter though. Enjoy.

Chapter 7: Bribery, Stolen Puppies, and New players

FINALLY, there seemed to be peace in little Yugi's home as his friends (and greatest enemy) played a hand of poker free of insults, sexual propositioning or fistfights.

Yami had FINALLY come down off of his sugar high (at least for a moment), even though he was still his regular super-melodramatic-good-guy self.

Joey and Tristan had FINALLY stopped fighting each other, realizing that trying to get back into the game would be better than beating themselves to death.

Too bad it all had to come crashing down with one phone call and a knock on the door. Which one came first, you ask? The phone call...

Rrrrrringggggg (or other lame sound effect)

Everyone looked around to see whose phone it was and realized that it was a certain CEO's thousand dollar (or hundred thousand yen, or thousand euro...you get the point.) cell phone going off.

"KAIBA! YOU MUST ANSWER YOUR SPEAKING INSTRUMENT IMMEDIATELY!" Yami had jumped on the table again, nearly knocking everyone's chips over in the process.

"First, it's a cell phone you loud-mouthed freak. Second, sit down before you wreck your poker table."

"THIS IS NOT MY TABLE...IT BELONGS TO MY HIKARI (or CLONE) YUGI!"

Kaiba muttered something about a straight jacket as he answered his phone. 'Kaiba, be brief."

"Helllooooooo Setoooo."

Kaiba groaned as he realized the identity of his caller. "Hello Mokuba, what do you want? And the answer's no, I've already given you a hundred thousand dollars in allowance this week!"

"DEAR BROTHER! I would NEVER, EVER ask you for money! You know that!"

"Yeah, and the Mutt can walk and chew gum at the same time."

Mokuba laughed on the other line as Joey jumped up and started yelling loud insults about the amount of hair gel Kaiba uses in his hair.

"DOWN YOU FILTHY BEAST! Anyway...what do you want, kid?"

"Seto...I'm on your computer right now."

"And this means what to me?"

Mokuba sat down in his brother's comfortable office chair, rolling around in it. "I know your little secret."

As soon as Kaiba heard that, he could have sworn the temperature went up about ten degrees. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Hmmmmmm...let me refresh your memory." Mokuba laughed as he opened up a file on the playlist. As soon as he heard the first note, Kaiba's eyes became the size of dinner plates. "NO! THAT'S FROM MY PRIVATE COLLECTION YOU LITTLE..."

"Calm down, big brother. It gets even better..." Mokuba clicked on another file, almost bringing tears to his brother's eyes.

"HOW DID YOU FIND IT! MY PRIVATE COLLECTION..."

"Seto, I helped you program the damn thing. I know where all your dirty little secrets are kept! Now let's see, what will it take for me to keep everyone from knowing you listen to the likes of N Sync, the Spice Girls, and Hilary Duff. Oh...I forgot your all time favorite...THE BAJA MEN!"

Kaiba dropped to his knees, drawing stares from everyone in the room. "Please Mokuba, I'm begging you! If word of this leaks out, my reputation will be-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, your rep will be ruined and everyone will know you're just a big softie, blah, blah, blah. Let's talk about a payment plan so that we can, um, hide those pesky little files, eh?"

"What do you want? Another hundred grand? A new car? A statue in city park with your likeness on it? Name your price, kid!" With each item he listed, Kaiba's voice became more desperate.

"Excuse me Kaiba, but can you beg like a pig AFTER our game of poker is over?" Mai said as she rested her chin on her hand.

"Quiet, blondie! The great reputation of Kaiba Corps. is at stake here."

Mai rolled her eyes and got up from the tabe, and to everyone's surprise grabbed Joey by the collar. (well, they SHOULDN'T be surprised, but let's just pretend they were, OK?)

"C'mon Joey, I don't have all night to wait on this loser of a millionaire."

"Huh?"

Everyone watched wide-eyed as Mai dragged Joey into the nearest closet availiable, locking the door behind her.

"Um...that was...spontaneous." Tea said, still in a bit of shock at what she had just seen.

Duke burst into a fit of laughter. "Do you think he CARES if it was spontaneous or not?"

Mokuba was calm as could be on the other line. I love being EVIL! "Nope. I want...you're BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON CARDS!"

Kaiba nearly fainted. Here he was, begging like a certain puppy that would never stop barking, at the hands of his own flesh and blood! Seto Kaiba swore an oath to whatever higher power existed that he would find the most severe method of payback that he could possibly think of. "Never! How dare you even blackmail me into such-"

"Now, now, Seto. Just think. Joey Wheeler finds out you listen to boy bands, a female pop singer, and some reggae group. Think about it...you won't EVER be able to live it down."

Kaiba muttured a curse under his breath. For goodness sake, the kid was right. If he didn't give in, the mutt would have enough dirt on him to make a fool of him for a lifetime. No! He wouldn't let that happen!

"Alright...you can have them."

"Oh...I don't want them."

Kaiba breathed a sigh of relief. Good, Blue Eyes cards are safe. Wait...if the little bastard didn't want those, what did he want?

"I want you to do this one little thing for me."

"And that little thing is?" Kaiba said through clenched teeth, nearly destroying his cell phone.

"I want you to..."

Kaiba nearly laughed outright at his little brother's request. There was no way in hell that that would EVER happen.

"Forget it."

Mokuba cleared his throat, then did his best to imitate those mobsters he had seen on T.V. "Oh? Then it would be a most unfortunate accident for these files to fall in the wrong hands."

Kaiba released a heavy sigh in defeat. Well, it looks like he would have to try to make the impossible possible. "Alright...and when this is over...YOU ARE SOO FREAKING DEAD!"

With that, Kaiba slammed his phone shut. Well...at least he didn't find the porn. I still have a few tricks up my sleeve.

DING DONG!

"WHAT? WHO DARES TO INTERRUPT OUR GAME OF POKER? I'LL SEND THEM TO THE SHADOW REALM!"

"Yami, please calm down, it's just someone at the door, not another threat to world peace that you must stop by playing Duel Monsters against." Tea said as she pushed herself up from the table, ignoring the rather loud sounds comming from the closet.

She opened the door, and two figures appeared under the dim outside lights...

Sorry, gotta cut it off there people. I hope that was enjoyable to you all, though I basically made this chapter up on the go. I think it turned out OK, but it could have been better. Well, please leave a review on the way out. I'll update when I get 55 reviews or I run out of other things to update, whichever occurs first.

Geaux Tigers!

BDB...out