When she got off the phone to Max she finally started to cry. After everything… She'd just about chided herself into stopping when the phone rang again.

"It's me," Ian said after she answered. "I think we need to talk. I'll be home tomorrow morning, first thing. Can you come round?"

"Sure," she replied.

"Bring Matthew?" he asked. "I'd like to meet my son."

"OK."

"And Steph?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for calling. It means a lot."

"I know," she said numbly. They said their goodbyes and she hung up. Taking a deep breath she went back into the kitchen and stared at the letter on the table. Ian was the match. He was the father of her son.

The sound of the door opening distracted her. Looking up she saw Max coming in. "I'm so sorry…" she whispered. "I was so sure…"

"Shh," he soothed, pulling her into his arms.

"I… we can go, tonight, if you…"

"You think I only wanted you here because I thought Matthew was mine? Oh, honey… I love you. I love him. This?" he said, gesturing the letter. "Doesn't matter."

"How can you say that?"

"How can I not?"

Steph pulled back slightly. "Summer's going to be devastated."

"I'll explain it to her. It shouldn't matter, Steph. You're not Summer's mother but it's never once stopped you from loving her. Let me, let us all do the same for Matthew."

"You're really OK with this?"

"It's just biology, Steph. I've always thought of him as mine, nothing's changed."

"You can cope with him calling Ian dad? The weekends, the holidays…?" As she spoke she saw his face fall. "What?"

"Nothing. I just…"

"Ian has to be a part of Matthew's life. You know that, right?"

"…Yeah…"

"Did you think I'd deny Ian the chance to get to know his son?"

"I'm just surprised that you're so willing to let him be a part of your life." He sighed and took a step back. "Look, let's just wait and see what he says, OK?"

"He's away at the moment…"

"So we've got time…"

"…he's flying back tomorrow morning."

Max froze. "You've spoken to him."

"Of course."

"You called him?"

"He had a right to know."

"Before or after me?"

"What?"

"Did you call him before or after you called me?"

"What does it matter who was first?"

"I thought the man you claim you want to spend the rest of your life with would have been higher on the list."

"Claim?"

"Ian…"

"Is the father of my son!" she snapped. "I can't ignore that, same way you can't ignore the fact that Claire is Summer and Boyd's mother."

"That's different…"

"Yeah, it is. Because Ian isn't dead and I'm not having Matthew miss out on having a father."

Too late she realised what she'd said.

"Max…"

"You know what I think, how I feel," he said. "You have to do what you think is right."

"By Matthew," she said quietly. "I have to do the right thing by him. And that means letting him know his father."

"Right," Max said, taking another step back. "I should be at work."

"Max…"

"I'll… I'll be late. Don't wait up." He left without saying another word.


Steph was fast asleep when he came home that night. He crept over to the cot and looked at Matthew, sleeping in ignorance. He couldn't help but smile when he saw Matthew; it was a reflex action in him. He'd been there when he was only a few hours old, held him, rocked him to sleep. He'd been the one to get up when he cried in the middle of the night, he was the one who'd been with Steph when they'd gone for all the new baby checkups. He could close his eyes and picture every line and contour of Matthew's body. He knew his scent, his smile, the noise he made at the back of his throat that Steph was calling his laugh.

He knew, without even looking, exactly how Matthew was sleeping.

How could he not be his father? Biology didn't count; he couldn't see Steph with Boyd and Summer and think that she wasn't a mother-figure to them. He could be a father to Matthew. He wanted to be a father to him. They'd always kept in their minds that the results may not have gone their way, but he'd always believed that he'd be the one being called "Dad". Not Ian. Not some guy who didn't understand the first thing about what makes Steph tick.

Turning back towards the bed, he watched her sleeping, her breath heavy. He knew that she was only sleeping lightly – she had done ever since Matthew had been born. If he so much as whimpered in his sleep she was awake and by his side.

With a sinking heart he realised that giving Matthew to Ian, even if it was only for a day, would kill her. She couldn't stand to be away from him for even the time it took for her to have a quick shower. In this room were two of the people Max loved most in the world. He'd only just gotten one of them back, and right now he had this nagging doubt that because of the other one he was going to lose her again.


She tried not to let it show when Ian picked up Matthew and held him for the first time. She wanted to tell him to support his head, not rock him so much... Max didn't have to be told, he was a natural. Why couldn't things be different?

"He's perfect," Ian said.

"Say that when he's crying at two in the morning," Steph said.

"Look, put the kettle on and we can have a chat."

"About what?"

"About what's bugging you. I know you, Steph. Something's wrong."

"It's nothing..."

"And you can't fob me off with that excuse. Come on. It's not just the fact that he's not Max's, is it?"

"Ian..."

"Or is it?"

"I'm not discussing this," she said, walking into the kitchen.

"You said he'd stand by you."

"And he is," she said. "He is."

"Then what?"

"It's you."

"Me?" Ian asked.

"He... doesn't like the idea of you being around."

"I see."

"We rowed about it this morning actually." She cursed herself for saying that. "It's not what you think."

"And what am I thinking?"

"He just needs to accept that you're going to be part of Matthew's life. And that means being a part of my life too."

"Steady on," Ian laughed. "Next thing you'll be saying is that you don't want to get a divorce."

"I love him, Ian."

"Can you stop mentioning that?" he asked. "It's not that... Look, all I have ever wanted is for you to be happy, Steph. You said that was my job, to cheer you up."

"That was a long time ago," she said.

"When we met you were drowning your sorrows."

"I remember."

"You challenged me to give you something to live for, to hang onto. I think I've done that," he said, looking down at Matthew.

"It was bad timing."

"What was?"

"Us. I was getting over..."

"I still love you, Steph. I always will."

"Ian, please."

"What? You can tell me that you're in love with another man but I can't tell you, my own wife, that I love you?"

"If you want him for the day, that's fine. I can pick him up this afternoon," Steph said, giving up on the kettle and heading for the door.

"You could come back this afternoon," Ian said. "I mean for good. We can work this out, deal with everything."

"Max..."

"Max isn't Matthew's father, I am. Max can't accept me, but you can."

"Don't do this," she said.

"All I'm doing is giving you an option, Steph. It's up to you if you take it."


"Hey!" Max called out as she opened the front door. "Come in here."

She followed his voice into the kitchen where she found him putting the last few items into a picnic basket. "What's going on?"

"I was thinking we should spend some time together. That's where we've been going wrong. I remember after Boyd was born Claire and I almost forgot we were married, we were so focused on him. We got round it by doing things together."

"Sounds good," she smiled. "And I'm sorry about this morning."

"Yeah, me too," he said. "You know I love you, right?"

"Oh, I have a fair idea," she grinned. "Just you and me then?"

"And Matthew, of course," he said.

"That could be a problem."

"Why?"

"He's..."

"You left him with Ian, didn't you?"

"Don't start this again."

"Start what? That without asking me you just drop him round for a visit?"

"Asking you? Since when did I need your permission?"

"That's not what I meant..."

"That's what it sounded like."

"Look, Steph, this isn't easy for me, OK? I just need some time to get used to... things. Once the divorce goes through you and I can start looking to our future and we... I can forget that he's got any real part in our lives."

"Except for the fact that he's Matthew's father," Steph pointed out.

"Why do you keep bringing that up?"

"Why do you keep ignoring it?"

"You know it doesn't matter to me..."

"Do I? Really? Because it seems it matters a lot."

"What? You think I'm jealous? Of what? You're here with me, you're getting a divorce."

"Not for you, I'm not."

"What?"

"I never should have married him in the first place. I love him, but not like I should."

"Why did you marry him then?"

"Because... because he was in the right place at the right time. I needed someone, I didn't have you, and I found him. And he made me laugh again without feeling bad about it. This was something new, something different, and I wasn't... caught up in history."

"And that made it all OK?"

"You of all people should know what I went through. You took off once upon a time."

"I lost my wife!"

"And I lost my father! And I was so unprepared for what that did to me. All you wanted to do was talk about it, as if talking was going to help or bring him back. Ian didn't know. Ian didn't want to talk about it. He just wanted me to be happy. And he made me happy. He gave me everything I wanted."

"Including a child," Max spat.

"I'm not shutting him out, Max."

"Then why are you bothering to divorce the guy?"

"You know what? I'm beginning to wonder that myself," she snapped in reply.

"You know he wants you back?"

"I know."

"So what are you waiting for?"

"Excuse me?"

"Ian gives you everything I can't, everything you say you want. So go be with him."

They stared at each other, waiting for one to call the other's bluff. Anger and stubbornness meant nothing was said.

"Fine," she said.