CHAPTER 7 RUTHIE
Sunday morning arrives and I can't believe the weekend is already almost gone. I get downstairs and we leave for church. I am happy enough to sit next to Martin during the service. It actually might not be a good thing, I'm so distracted by him I haven't heard a word Dad has said. He's wearing a suit today and he looks so handsome. I close my eyes for a second and breathe in the aroma of Martin's cologne. I open my eyes and look at his hands, he's fidgeting. Sometimes he acts like such a little kid, it's adorable. I catch the last few statements of Dad's sermon. It had something to do with Job, that much I know.
Church is over and we're all getting ready to go. "You know what Mom and Dad; I think I'm going to walk home. I need to clear my mind. I have some thinking to do." I slide the door of the van shut and start walking. Our house isn't terribly far away from the church, but it seems so much further when you're wearing high heels. I take them off and carry them in my hands. As I'm passing the park that I was at yesterday I stop to sit on the swings.
After a while of just sitting there I get up and finish walking home. I reach the front door just as it's opening. It's Dad, "We were really worried about you. Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine; I just had some thinking to do. So I stopped at the park and sat there for a while. But I have things all figured out now."
"What things? What are you talking about Ruthie?"
"Oh nothing, there's just this boy I like. It's been causing me all sorts of confusion. But Lucy gave me some really good advice, so I'm okay now."
"Are you sure? I'm here if you want to talk about it."
"No, I think I'm fine. Or at least I'll be fine. I'm really nervous about telling him about my feelings."
"Who is this boy, if you don't mind me asking?"
"I think I'm going to tell him before I tell anyone else. He deserves to know how I feel about him. If it makes things worse between us, then it wasn't meant to be." If only I really felt that way. My dad seemed to buy it though and let's me be.
With that said I walk up stairs and into my room. I change out of my church clothes and into a comfy pair of sweats. I go over many different ways to tell him. I was thinking about just coming out with it and saying to the effect of 'Martin, I think I'm falling in love with you.' But I don't think that is the right way to go, so I went on thinking some more.
I look outside and the sun is starting to set, so I decide to sit outback and watch it kiss the horizon. That was one of my favorite things as a kid, sitting out here with Matt, Mary, Lucy, and Simon watching the sunset. For a moment the reminiscing takes my mind off of Martin and it's a nice break.
I go outside and sit on top of the picnic table for what seems like hours. I guess it has been a while because the sun has gone down and the air has a crisp kick. The nights get kind of chilly here and before I know it I'm shivering. I'm getting ready to go inside just as Lucy comes outside with a blanket and some cocoa. "Thanks Luce. I was just getting ready to go inside and get my jacket."
"You're welcome. Have you decided what you're going to do?"
"I'm going to tell him, tonight. I'm just trying to gather the courage to do it. He's worth it though. Even if he's not the one, I need to know. I'll regret it for the rest of my life if I don't find out."
"You know what Ruth? You are wise beyond your years. Everything will turn out fine. In my heart of hearts I know that you'll be okay." I turn toward her with tears in my eyes and she wraps her arms around me. We sit like that for several minutes, until Lucy says to me, "Martin's at the door. He's probably going to be coming out here, so I'm going to go inside. Good luck sweetie." She stands up and goes into the apartment.
"Thanks Luce." Deep breaths, I can do this. Just keep breathing, that's the key.
Martin comes outside and sits down next to me. "I heard you telling your dad that you're going to tell the guy how you feel." Here's my chance, I have to tell him.
"Yeah, I'm going to tell him. I just can't find the right words." Boy is that the truth, now that the time has finally arrived my mind has gone blank.
"Before you tell him there's something I want to tell you…" Please don't tell me I'm to young to date some one your age…
"Okay go ahead." Please be something good!
"Alright… all I was going to say is… never mind. It doesn't matter." Huh? That's weird.
"Okay? Are you sure there wasn't something?" Before I can comprehend it he stands up and turns toward the house. He starts walking in and then turns around. I'm glad he's coming back, I have something to tell him.
"No it is important, Ruthie I… what I was going to say is this…" He doesn't say anything and I'm getting a little confused. But then he walks up to me and looks me in the eyes, he leans in close as though he's going whisper in my ear. He puts his hand on my cheek and then does something I never expected, he kisses me. I'm so shocked I just sit there; he starts to pull away when it finally hits me and I pull him to me and kiss him back. I wrap my arms around his neck and he puts his hands on my back.
"I really like you. I've been kind of distant because of you liking that other guy. If you still need to tell him about your feelings, I understand." The look on his face made it look as though his dog had just died.
"Really? You like me? I don't have to tell him after all… he told me first."
"It was me? The guy you like so much, is me? Why didn't you tell me?" With that he leans in to kiss me again. I don't think this could have turned out any better. I definitely wouldn't have had the courage to kiss him. I'm so glad he did, he's a really great kisser.
"Yeah, it was you the entire time. I can't believe this is happening! I'm so relieved. I was so afraid to tell you, I thought that you wouldn't feel the same way."
"I do, I feel the same way. I really like you Ruthie. I have never been happier in my entire life. I've been contemplating telling you this for the last several days. I have never been more nervous in my entire life.
"Me too, I've been going through the exact same thing. Lucy gave me some really great advice though."
"You mean, she knew you liked me?"
"Yeah, I told her I did."
"I told that I liked you, so she knew that we liked each other. I can't believe she knew and she just let us both be so miserable."
"I guess she just wanted us to figure it out for ourselves. It means a lot more coming from you, than it would coming from Lucy. She knew we'd tell each other eventually. She urged me to tell you, she told me that she knew you'd like me too."
"She basically told me the same thing. This is so crazy, I can't help feeling a little mad at her, but then I also am really thankful to her. She kept her promise to both of us."
"Yeah, she did. She is a really great sister like that."
"Well, Ruthie Camden, let's make this official… will you be my girlfriend?"
"Yes, of course I will." And then, we kiss some more. My heart is happy. The story of Martin Brewer and Ruthie Camden will always be a happy one.
Author's Notes:
To be continued…?
