"Like, we now return to Scooby Doo, man."
"Now let's see who's behind this mask," Velma said as she unmasked the villain. "Spongebob, just as I suspected. He was selling F.U.N. to minors."
"And I would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you meddling kids and that Disney Channel!" Spongebob screamed as he was being dragged away by the police.
"Well," said Velma, "looks like we've solved another mystery, gang!"
"Reah," said Scooby. "Scooby Dooby Doo!"
Everyone laughs.
"Cut!" The director yelled. "Okay, we're done. See you tomorrow, guys."
"Where's my cigarettes!" Velma breathed hard. "Well, at least we're finally done with this crappy episode. I'm too good for this!"
"Ha!" Daphne snorted. "I'm the pretty one. I'm the one who shouldn't be on a show where I have to solve mysteries with a mentally-challenged dog, an ugly nerd who probably eats children, a perverted steroid-popping man with an orange napkin in his shirt, and a stick man who constantly smokes pot during every commercial break!"
"Hey man," Shaggy said slowly. "I told you I only smoke pot for medical purposes," Shaggy said as he fainted.
Fred butted in. "And I only molested 10 children. That hardly qualifies me as a pervert! Oh, and you're one to talk, Daphne," Fred said smugly. "Remember the girl Scout incident?"
-Flashback-
A Girl Scout knocks on Daphne's door. Daphne opens the Door.
"What the hell do you want?" asked Daphne.
"I'm selling Girl Scout Cookies," the little girl replied happily.
"So what! You think you're better than me now!?"
"No, Miss, I just wanted to sell you..."
Daphne interrupted, "Why do I have to be a 'Miss,' can't I be a Mrs.!?"
The little Girl looked frightened. "I didn't mean it that way..."
Daphne interrupted again, "What do you mean, 'mean?' Are you calling me bi-polar!?"
"No, I...I..." The little girl started crying. "I just wanted you to buy some cookies so I can earn some money for the orphanage."
"Whatever," Daphne said as she got out her purse. "I'll take a box of Chocolate Mint Cookies"
"Um...I don't have any of those," the girl said nervously.
"What?" Daphne yelled. "Do you know how pretty I am? You're holding out on me, aren't you!?"
"I can go get some more," the little girl said while slowly stepping back.
"No! You'll just try to escape! Give me the cookies!" Daphne said while shaking the little girl.
-End Flashback-
"You know what," said Fred, "let's take our minds off all of this by going to Pizza Hut."
-Eggman dashes out-
"Did someone say Pizza Hut!" Eggman said enthusiastically. "Let's Go!"
-So Eggman, Scooby Doo and the other people that nobody cares about got into the Mystery Machine and started driving to Pizza Hut-
While driving down the road, the road suddenly turned green.
"This road looks really scary, Fred," Daphne said in fear.
"Shut up, Daphne!" Fred screamed. "I'm the man, and I know where we're going. If you got a problem with that, then I'll beat up your Grandma again."
"That ascot makes you look like a white Donkey Kong, Fred," Daphne snickered.
"Why don't you bite me, Daphne?" Fred Replied.
"Well then, why don't you bite a banana, Caucasian Kong."
Eggman listened in amazement. "Do they always fight like this?" he said to Shaggy.
"I don't know," Shaggy said slowly. "I was always too busy smoking pot to notice," Shaggy said as he started staring at his hand.
"...Okay," said Eggman. "I'm going to go talk to a more intelligent person."
Eggman moves over to Scooby Doo.
"...So...um...how are you doing, talking dog?" Eggman asked.
"Ri'm rinda rungry," said Scooby.
Eggman looked confused, "What?"
"Ri'm rungry."
"Huh?" Eggman said even more confused.
"Ri raid, ri'm rungry!"
"What are you saying?"
Scooby sighed. "Ri Roing Ro Rill Rou."
"Oh, I understand now," said Eggman. "You must be one of those 'special' dogs."
"Ri ron't rike rou."
Daphne suddenly screamed, "Fred, look out for the...!!"
The Mystery Machine crashed.
"Tree," Daphne said with little enthusiasm.
Velma got out of the Mystery Machine. "Where are we, and where are my cigarettes!?"
"Sorry, man," Shaggy said as he crawled out of the Mystery Machine. "I ran out of sugar for my cereal, so I used the ash from your cigarettes."
"...Okay," Velma said surprised.
"Great driving, Fred," Daphne commented.
"Thanks, Daphne...Hey, wait! That was sarcasm, wasn't it?!" Fred said confused.
Daphne shook her head.
"Zoinks! A ghost!!" Shaggy pointed at the road.
"Ahh, a ghost!" Eggman yelled in fear. "Wait a minute. Did you just say Zoinks?"
The ghost came closer to the group.
"Boo, I'm a scary ghost and stuff!" said the ghost.
Eggman stared, "Yeah, and...?"
"And I'm going to scare you or something," the ghost said unenthusiastically.
Eggman continued to stare. "You lack showmanship, and I have yet to wet myself from fear."
"Whatever man, I'm just here to tell you that you'll never make it out of this forest alive, and to tell you, you can save money on car insurance by switching to Geico," the ghost said then disappeared.
"Scary," said Daphne.
"The ghost?" Fred asked.
"No, how that dog can talk," Daphne answered.
"...okay," said Fred. "Well, gang, we're all lost in a creepy forest, our car is busted, we have no food or water, and I have to pee...so let's split up, gang!"
"What a great idea," Eggman said sarcastically. "Why exactly are you the leader?"
"Because of my steroid problem," Fred Replied.
"That's a GREAT reason to be leader," Eggman said with more sarcasm.
Fred suddenly falls into a trap door.
"Fred!!" Daphne cried. "You still owe me moneeeeeeey!!!"
The trap door closes.
"Wow," said Eggman. "There's a plot twist. I didn't even know there were trap doors in forests."
"Well," said Shaggy. "Who wants some pot?"
"Do you ever think of anything other than pot, Shaggy?" Velma asked.
"I'm gonna need to smoke some more pot to answer that question."
Velma shook her head. "Well, let's split up, gang! Me and Daphne will go one way, and Eggman and Scooby will go the other way."
"What about Shaggy?" Eggman asked Velma.
"Just leave him."
"Okay," Eggman replied happily.
So the gang split up and left shaggy behind.
Velma and Daphne's POV
"Velma," Daphne whined, "I'm too pretty to walk. Why don't you carry me?"
Velma stared. "Why don't you shut the.."
A cliff suddenly appeared, and Daphne and Velma conveniently fall down it.
Eggman and Scooby's POV
Eggman suddenly shudders. "That's weird. I feel as though another stupid plot twist has just occurred...oh well."
"I'm hungry, and I've also decided to talk normally," said Scooby. "I'm so hungry. This reminds me of when I ate the real shaggy and replaced him with a hobo who likes to smoke pot...I'll have the kill you now, Eggman, because now you know my secret."
"Huh, what'd you say?" Eggman was eating a sandwich. "I wasn't listening."
"I said, I'm going to kill you, because you now know my secret about me eating the real shaggy!"
Eggman was eating another sandwich. "Huh, what'd ya say again?"
Scooby groaned. "I'm going to kill you, because now you know about me eating shaggy!"
"Well, I didn't know until just now. Why did you keep repeating it? Are you really stupid or something?"
"That's it, Egg! It's time to battle!" Scooby yelled. "Pokeball GO!" -Pikachu comes out-
"...Okay, I chose Shadow the Hedgehog! GO Pokeball!" Eggman yelled. -Shadow comes out- "Shadow, use your G-rated gun attack!"
Shadow uses the G-rated gun attack. Pikachu is hit and falls...nonviolently.
"Nooooooo!" Scooby yelled. "I'll get you, Eggman!" Scooby gets out a light saber.
"What?!" the producer yelled.
-Somewhere in Hollywood-
"Wait a minute," said the producer. "So, how did Scooby get a pokemon and then suddenly pull out a light saber?"
"Um," Eggman pondered, "through his magical powers or something?"
"This story makes no sense at all! And exactly how does a cliff suddenly appear!" The producer yelled. "When you said you had an All-Star script for a new Scooby Doo movie, I didn't expect this crap!"
"It's better than Scooby Doo 2."
The Producer sighed. "When can I expect the movie to be done?"
"Huzzah!" Eggman yelled.
-Commercial-
In a world of evil.
"Zoinks! Scooby, what are you doing?!"
One egg will rise up to stop a horrible and hungry villain.
"I've eaten, Shaggy, and I'll eat you, too!" Scooby yelled.
and his plot to eat the World.
"I'll eat the World and Scrappy Doo, too!! HAHAHAHA!"
Everyone is dying around him.
"Ah, I'm suddenly falling down a cliff!" Daphne yelled.
Also, to make the story more interesting, let's say aliens are attacking or something.
Eggman stars in "Scooby Doo 3: I Know What You Ate Last Summer."
And this time, it's Jinkies.
Coming to a dumpster near you!
