A great Disappointment
Chapter 3
Ryou's POV
Drunk.
He came home drunk again.
He who they think supports me. He who should.
My poor father. Am I that much of a burden on your heart that you must constantly drink away your sorrows?
I should leave.
I should leave and let you live.
It is me who has caused all of your pain.
I didn't mean to kill her.
I didn't know that if I didn't go straight home after school she would die.
Instead, I stopped at the playground.
I was selfish.
I chose to play as she was at home fixing that cloth around her neck. .
I chose to play as she stood high up on her bed's end, ready to step off.
I chose to play as dad turned the house key, and opened the door, set to relax after a ling day at work.
There would be no relaxing for him. Never again.
And so, I am sorry.
………. ……. ….. … . … … .. .. ….
As I stand here in my room, I debate whether or no to do it.
I chose the knife from the kitchen.
The small, insignificant one. That which you would, normally, only choose when there was no other option.
That must be why it's so sharp today.
And I've decided.
I have no worth here any longer.
No one to save me, for I am alone.
The great disappointment.
This is, after all, why I skipped class today. To be home. To do this.
No one noticed.
… .. .. .. … … … … … .. … … … …
I feel the cold steel press against my wrist.
I feel how the blade seems to sting when I run it across my pale skin.
I feel how I am lightheaded from this strange sensation. It's nice. An emotional relief.
And as I feel the droplets running smoothly down my hand, I head my bedroom door open.
Turning my head lazily towards the sound, I hear you suck in your breath.
I had forgotten about you. How incredibly selfish of me.
You sacrificed your shirt to stop my blood.
You picked me up; wrapped your (surprisingly) strong arms around me, and carried me off to the outside.
The light makes me dizzy, so I move my head closer to your chest.
You smell familiar, and for a moment I feel as if I'm not dying.
(a/n: ok i wansn't going to write anymore of this story.. but then i ended up writing this chapter. i hope you enjoy it, and there will be at least one more chapter to this. please review. thank you soo much to all who have reviewed this so far, you really made my day.)
