Title: Let your Hair Down
Description: After waking up from a drunken celebration in Heaven, Kanzeon decides to stir things up a bit. Meanwhile, Gojyo feels bored and goes looking for something new. SanzoxGoku, some JiroshinxKanzeon and some weirder pairings later on.
Rated: M. For language, mostly Gojyo's, indecent exposure on the part of Kanzeon, and mature subject matter.
A/N: Yay! Four reviews. Okay, I made a few mistakes in the first chapter that I wanted to point out, and tried to fix in this one.

1) Jiroshin was kind of OOC. He's usually pushier with Kanzeon, and I made him a little too servile. Which I guess I could say is because he was just really embarrased because Kanzeon is a shekshy nekkid hermaphrodite. But I still think I did it wrong.

2) I called Kanzeon the "Goddess of Love and Mercy." Which is dumb, because se's not a Goddess, se's a Bodhisattva. So this time around that's what I called hir.

So, Sanzo and Goku get their story arc in Chapter 4, now that I have it figured out. They're going to be kind of angsty, although the rest of the fic is pretty light hearted, so I'll try to tone it down. Hakkai still has no role to speak of. Warui, Hakkai.


Let your hair down

Ch 3. The Bored Meeting

Kanzeon yawned. The highest ranking gods and Bodhisattvas had been gathered together for a meeting of some kind. A fat, black folder was sitting in front of hir, outlining all of the contents of discussions that were to take place. Of course, se hadn't even touched it.

The number of empty chairs outnumbered the heavenly officers almost two to one. A heavy tension hung in the air of the clean monochrome room and the unperturbed Bodhisattva leaned back a little further and closed hir eyes. One thing about Heaven: you could always count on comfy furniture.

God himself had not graced the gathering with his presence, but his assistant rattled on, even though most of the company was asleep or nearly there. Obviously, half of the gods invited had chosen to stay home to nurse their hangovers, but Jiroshin had panicked as soon as they'd gotten back to the house and he realized that his master had somewhere to be. A set of clean clothing, a lot of pleading and six Aspirins later, Kanzeon was sleeping through the important meeting. Se made a mental note to smack Jiroshin later, even if he was only doing his job.

"Kanzeon Bosatsu, Great Bodhisattva of Love and Mercy," hir head shot up when the man in front addressed hir by name.

A few bleary eyes shifted in hir direction, but otherwise nobody paid attention.

Se looked up at the god with what se hoped was serious interest, "Yeah?"

"What is your honored opinion on..." Kanzeon never heard the rest of the sentence.

There were two sentries flanking God's assistant. Nothing unusual about that, it was protocol to have guards posted around meetings like this; not that there was much danger. In fact, it was usually just low class soldiers who rotated the sentry posts. Greenhorns from each of the Western, Eastern, Northern and Southern armies were obliged to spend a few weeks doing this kind of job. They might as well have been part of the decor, and Kanzeon hadn't paid any attention to them on hir way in. None of the other gods understood why the Bodhisattva was staring with such intensity at this particular sentry.

Undaunted by the attention suddenly focused upon him, the young soldier gave Kanzeon a wink and flashed hir a grin. Recognition slowly crept over hir features and se shot up, knocking hir chair over in the process.

"Fuck."

Either the loud crash of the chair or the obscenity that followed had shocked most of the party awake. The young soldier frowned slightly, a simple confused gesture that reminded hir of the child-heretic's face, so long ago...and it hit hir.

Without warning, Kanzeon bolted out of the room, still too dignified to run, but marching hurriedly towards hir own home. Several of hir servants, who'd been stationed outside to escort hir home, rushed after their master in a confused heap.


Jiroshin had been enjoying a peaceful moment, proud of himself for getting his master out on time with less fuss then usual. He sat in the garden, sweet scents and pleasant songs fillings his ears and nose as he sipped a glass of hot tea until a loud bang made him knock his tea over. He sputtered for a moment as the wet hot liquid stung his cheeks and glued his long beard to his face before he saw his master stomp by with a train of desperate looking servants.

"What in the...?"

He sprang up in time to catch one of the servants by the arm and demand an explanation.

"I...Master Bosatsu...just..." the girl managed before bursting into tears.

Unsure what to do with this new development, he patted the girl on the shoulder and mumbled a quick "It's okay" before rushing after the crowd.

When he finally located the source of the commotion, se was locked behind the bathroom door. The other servants and Jiroshin looked nervously from one to the other. Their master wasn't cruel by any stretch of the imagination, but se did have odd tendencies and kept them on their toes simply by being so unpredictable.

At length Jiroshin decided to knock on the door.

"Master Bosatsu?"

"I'll be out in a while."

The deep voice that came out muffled through the bathroom door was hoarse, and Jiroshin knew meant that Kanzeon was stressed, something that rarely ever happened.

The servants stood around uneasily for a few moments: some of them trickled away to return to their chores, but most of them waited around the bathroom door stupidly. After all, they loved their master and worried about hir.


What seemed like an eternity later, Kanzeon burst out of the bathroom. Se nearly radiated happiness.

"It's white!" se declared cryptically and launched hirself at Jiroshin, wrapping hir arms around his neck. He was thinking of what to say when se planted a big wet kiss right on his mouth. The moment couldn't possibly be too long for Jiroshin, but the next instant his master had the next person, this time the girl who'd been crying earlier, wrapped in a tight hug.

"Uh, am I interrupting something...?"

Jiroshin spun around to meet the small voice. Kanzeon, without noticing, continued to grab at each of hir gaggle of servants while they hammered hir with questions. He immediately recognized the young soldier from the night before who he'd seen with his master. Jiroshin felt an unpleasant swell of jealousy.

"Y...you!" he exclaimed before he could stop himself, in a louder voice then he should have.

The other servants and Kanzeon stopped the activity and turned towards the source of the noise.

"You know, this is that second time today this's happened to me," the soldier gave a weak smile under the gaze of the dozens of eyes now focused on him.

"What are you doing here?" Kanzeon's voice was cold.

"Well, you kind of freaked out back there when you saw me, so I thought I should come see if you're okay."

"Oh," hir shoulders relaxed. Se gave a quick look around hir, suddenly exhausted by the young soldier's presence. Se really didn't want to deal with him right now, or with any of them for that matter.

The soldier opened his mouth to speak again, but se waved a dismissive hand and turned on hir heels. Se felt the Aspirin that Jiroshin had stuffed down hir throat starting to wear off, and all se really wanted to do was get away from everyone for a while.

"K-Kanzeon-sama?" Jiroshin was jogging behind hir. The others had wisely chosen to stay behind, but he felt that he should at least find out what his master was up to before se charged off.

Kanzeon reached hir bed chamber and started digging around. Se pulled out a plain looking shirt and pants and began to change.

"What, uh, what was 'white'?"

"My pregnancy test."

Jiroshin felt the knot of worry in his stomach lighten a little. Maybe se wasn't planning anything rash after all. Still, he asked one more question to assure himself.

"Where are you going?"

Kanzeon spun around, a blank but annoyed look on hir face that was so like hir nephew's.

"I need a vacation."


Okay! Now, certainly my favorite part of this whole business. Replying to my lovely reviewers.

iceblitz: I'm glad you liked it. I was laughing while I was writing it!I thought about dragging out the youkai scene a bit, maybe adding in what he looks like, but I thought that would've been a bit boring to read. Yay. You reviewed both chapters, I'm so happy.

Koryu-Sanzo: Ahh...you left me such a nice long review. Thank you TT

OMFG Jiroshin totally has the hots for Kanzeon. He thinks se's damned sexy.

Hmm, well I supposethe youkai guydid catch on, but Gojyo only really noticed right at the end there, so he didn't have time to run away. (cough). That's right, I can explain away any loopholes.

Oh God, don't send chickens at me. I'm terrifed of those little bastards. (Hurries off to write chapter 4)

next up!
ch. 4 (which had a title but I forgot it)
In which Goku gets jealous and Gojyo doesn't get ANY.

Please RandR.