Teacher

Harry ended up leading the school on a giant manhunt, and most of his hunters were those who believed Harry to be an imposter death eater, which gave him little incentive to get "captured". He may have felt bad for stringing a bunch of kids along if he didn't have so much fun doing it. He considered this his revenge on the student body as a whole for being a giant mass of complete asshole last year.

Though the searched continued for over an hour, Harry had ditched everyone long before and took refuge in the headmaster's office. He didn't want to see the man—the thought of what Dumbledore did that summer still irked him—but didn't have much of a choice if he were to get back on schedule.

Harry sat in a comfy chair and waited; mildly disappointed that Fawkes wasn't in the room to keep him company. Thankfully, the wait was a short one as twenty minutes later Albus Dumbledore strolled into his office, glancing at Harry, unsurprised, before taking a seat at his desk and steepling his fingers.

Harry had to give credit where it was due; Dumbledore was the very definition of poise.

"I am most curious as to how my gargoyles managed to end up littered about the hall with a gaping hole in the wall exposing my staircase."

Harry gave a sheepish grin, "Aren't you just glad I'm alive?"

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled in response to this.

"Indeed. Lemon drop, Harry?"

"Seriously?"

"I thought not. Now tell me, where have you been?"

Harry decided to humor the man, figuring beforehand that it would be good to stay in Dumbledore's good books for now. He told the headmaster a very edited account of what happened. He confirmed falling into Hell, claiming he had to fight off a few demons using magic and then escaped through a rift between the barriers.

Dumbledore accepted the answer, knowing it wasn't the whole truth but not pressing further.

"You don't know how fortunate you are to have fallen in such a low populated area in Hell," the older wizard informed him. Harry just shrugged, fighting down a smirk.

Dumbledore stood and clapped his hands.

"You may come in now," he called to his door. It slowly creaked open, and revealed every guilty face of the Hogwarts staff."

"Albus, it is really him?" Professor Sprout asked from the front of the group.

"Yes, it's really him," Harry answered instead, annoyed that he would be talked about while he stood right there. The teachers immediately tried to bombard him with questions, which Dumbledore quickly quelled.

"This is not the time, you have heard enough through your eavesdropping. Harry has a potions class to get to in twenty minutes, if we are to get him back on schedule, and school supplies which I'm sure he still needs to purchase."

"I'm not taking potions," Harry said hurriedly.

"Harry, I assure you that your grade does not matter and that it is all worked out—," Dumbledore started before Harry cut him off.

"It has nothing to do with grades," he said. He turned to McGonagall with an apologetic look. "But as I no longer wish to be an auror, I just have no use for potions."

That seemed to strike a cord with Snape, "Why you ignorant, ungrateful—,"

"Very well," Dumbledore said loudly, cutting off the man from a very repeated tirade. "If that is the choice Harry has made then we will respect it. Harry, you will receive your new schedule tomorrow morning at breakfast. Oh, and one more thing, I'd like you to meet two new additions to the staff. Professor Verchik will be your new Defense Against the Dark Arts instructor..."

Harry looked at the indicated woman standing in the back, pale and cold, and knew instantly that she was a vampire.

"...And Professor Nagasaki will be teaching muggle studies, which should not concern you."

Oh, but it concerned him very much. Harry glanced over and noticed Inuyasha wink at him from his place besides the vampire. That man had a lot of explaining to do.

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Dumbledore confirmed Harry's reappearance during dinner that evening, reassuring many of the students that he was not an imposter. In response to this, many of the student's felt that they had to go and personally welcome Harry back. Harry was overwhelmed with the sounds and smells from the reception and by the end of the meal was hard pressed not to throw off the glamour charm and claw everyone who came within a ten-foot radius of him.

Apparently he managed to find a good, mean look that got people to back off, because for the last several minutes he had been left alone in peace, able to finish his dinner, aside from the incessant questions Hermione bombarded him with regarding his whereabouts and Ron repeatedly asking if he saw any demons.

Harry responded distractedly, telling them he would explain later when there were less people around. His attention mostly stayed on the teacher's table as he watched Inuyasha try to woo the stoic vampires. The woman appeared determined not to give into his flirtations and Harry figured she was probably the only one in the school who wouldn't go weak at the knees in front of Inuyasha. Inuyasha was probably the only man with the balls to openly hit on her.

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"Hey Harry, were you really in Hell?" Seamus asked keenly once the five boys were back in the privacy of their dorm. Dean sat up straighter on his bed and Ron looked up from his quidditch book, both wondering the same thing. Even Neville, who busied himself with qietly putting away his robes into his trunk, listened.

"Yeah," Harry said, shaking out his pajama bottoms. He knew he couldn't evade the questions forever. Especially from his dorm mates.

"So...what was it like?" Dean asked, "Did you see any demons?"

"It was very dull and boring, nothing but rocks. And I saw lots of demons."

"How can you see lots of demons and be bored?" asked Ron, who sat cross-legged on his bed, book pushed to the side. Apparently he had forgiven Harry for being an ass on his birthday—though much of that forgiveness likely came from having everything put into perspective when he thought Harry was dead.

Harry, on the other hand, had yet to forgive Ron and his other friends for what he felt was betraying him to Dumbledore. He decided to play it cool for now and not mention anything; the last thing he needed was unnecessary drama.

"With my life, demons will not bring much excitement," Harry stated, pulling off his shirt and hopping into bed. Even with their window open, the September air was still on the warm side.

"Merlin's balls!" Neville exclaimed. Every occupant of the room turned and stared at the usually reserved boy, who began to turn pink with embarrassment.

"Well look at his bloody tattoos!" he said pointing at Harry to remove the attention from himself. Harry groaned, realizing that he probably should not have added the tattoos to the glamour. He hadn't given it much thought when he applied the charm; he only focused on what he looked like before the transformation.

"Nice Harry!" Seamus said appreciatively with a nod towards Harry's arm. He could recognize what the Ankh was.

"Does Hermione know?" Ron asked, looking at the Seal of Cagliostro with interest.

"No, and let's keep it that way. She'll tell your mother, and that's a howler for me."

Ron grinned at him, "blackmail."

Harry chose not to respond to that and instead opted for some answers for himself.

"So tell me about the new teachers," he said, grabbing a light tank top to sleep in.

"Professor Verchik is hot, but she's a vampire, which is kind of a turn off. She's a really good teacher, though. Very fair." Dean said after pulling his own pajama shirt over his head.

"Yeah," Seamus agreed. "And Professor Nagasaki is cool too. I don't have him or anything, but from what Lavender told me he's really insightful and funny."

Harry stared at him, "Since when did Lavender take muggle studies? Isn't she muggle born?"

"Since Professor Nagasaki showed up," Ron answered with something akin to disgust, "Ever since he was first introduced at the start of the school year, a lot of girls dropped their subjects to join Muggle studies. Parvati and Ginny did it too. Hermione almost did, but I stopped her."

Harry had to stifle a laugh at the thought of Hermione swooning over Inuyasha like a rabid fan girl. The very thought was just so out of character for the bookworm that he almost wished it were true.

"Hey, at least it's helping to build, er, muggle awareness," Harry ventured, trying to find a bright side to it. Dean and Seamus snickered.

"Oh yeah, they're aware all right," Neville muttered. "But something tells me its not from listening."

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