SHAKE YOUR BON-BONS! (Does Funky Chicken)

Alright, this is gonna be a long one, so PR3P4R3 T0 SUFF3R 3VIL L33T!

It's time to suffer! THE RESULTS OF THE POPULARITY CONTEST!

RESULTS OF THE POPULARITY CONTEST

FIRST PLACE: Seto Kaiba (19 points)
SECOND PLACE: Serenity Wheeler (13 points)
THIRD PLACE: Joey Wheeler and Ryo Bakura(10 points)
FOURTH PLACE: ASV (7 points)
FIFTH PLACE: Not-Ryo (3 points)
SIXTH PLACE: Moster, Double S, and Ms. Fuzzy-Kins (2 points)
SEVENTH PLACE: Johney Roma and Ryu Barabus (1 point)

Honorable Mention: Yugi Moto and Pegasus

Reasonable Conclusion: there are lots of Seto Fangirls in the audience.

I can't believe Serenity, the main character, lost the popularity contest. Seto won…hee hee, I bet that annoys him to no end.

Review time!

Imperfect Paradise

It does seem very odd that a bloodthirsty assassin would ask permission to oust you…oh well, in my tiny brain, anything's possible.

I really think the last Harry Potter will be eleven inches thick. And I completely agree with you on the selling thing. Boy, just think of all the cash you'd get if you put that up for bids on E-Bay.

GO SPEED RACER! One of my friends is an absolute fanatic.

Thank you for the review! And congrats for being the first to review again!

Shadow Fire

That sounds pretty cool. I've never seen Star Wars before. I probably should sometime.

Yay! Thanks for reviewing. Enjoy this chapter!

Mokuba's Official Glomper

Hooray for hearts!

Asexual means not having a gender at all, and reproducing by budding. Ya know, like amoebas and single-celled organisms and stuff. I'm so mean to Seto X).

Anyway, thanks for the review! Mer her her, hope to see you next time!

Bilbo-Sama

Is Bilbo an actual character? I'm just wondering…

HOORAY FOR SUPER-KAWAII PUPPIES:D SO CUTE! What kind of dog is Eddie? Does he have cool mind control powers that force you to take him outside? Boy, I am one insane little authoress…

I think he does have weird telekinetic powers. That's how he manages to summon enough power to topple the baby gate! Or something like that.

Yay, thanks for reviewing my other story too! Enjoy this next chappie!

Lefthandedfreak

Hello my good friend Left hand! (Waves hello) Hello JFM! ( Waves hello again)

Seto praying for death is something I really expect from him. And off course, God has a good sense of humor and keeps him alive X). Ryo caffeine highness was doomed to appear in this story at one point.

Ouch, watch out for those poles! Enjoy this next chapter!

Funky Egyptian

Yay! I'm glad I gave you thirty Fridays of insanity! (Claps)

Thank you so much for the laugh! Hope this chapter makes you laugh too!

Dark Princess Saz, Yami, The Good Employees of Kitsune Corp, and Kyo

Ah, the desperate search for fire! There never seems to be enough around. Saz accidentally set a lawn on fire? I once set a pizza on fire in the toaster by accident…

Wa ha ha! Another inane review! You never cease to amuse me Yami. So…(sends Yami rabid animal in a package labeled 'free money') HAVE FUN YAMI!

I'm sorry. I can't help but torture characters. (Sends Yami band-aides in a separate package).

ENJOY THIS CHAPTER EVERYONE!

Gothangelmyu

No, Ryo in his unique insanity only SP33K$ L33T when on caffeine. He's funny that way.

I think you pretty much hit the nail on the head. It seams like everyone needs saving badly! ASV a lawyer…nope, I can't picture it.

Anyway, thanks for enjoying the chapter! Hope ya like the next chapter too!

Mizz-Serenity-Wheeler

Hooray! Thanks for the nice complements!

Poor budgies. They are masters of playing dead.

Recommend a novel? Um…hm…I'd recommend one if you like seeing how freaky Pegasus is, two if you like guys dueling puppets, three if you like seeing Mai wailing on the guys, four if you like to see Jounouchi acting like an idiot, five if you like to see Seto knocking the crud out of a bunch of guards, and six if you like to see Seto get his butt kicked.

Enjoy this chapter off doom! MUA HA!

Fuzzy-Bunny

Boy, Monty Python, badly dubbed animes, and sleepovers? That's a weird combination.

I think the Simon Says was my favorite part of the whole last chapter.

Joey has an extremely basic system off thinking. He says 'woot' because it's kind of a combination of 'woo-hoo' and 'sweet'. Or something like that.

I love answering questions! Thank you much!

Cute lil Yami

YAY! (Hugs)

I feel so privileged! Three favorite character lists? You made my day! I especially am glad that you liked some of the other characters in this story!

THANK YOU AGAN (gives brownies)! ENJOY THE NEXT CHAPTER!

LoneFlyinTigers

Ryo has thankfully gotten out of his disturbing phase.

The idea that Seto is afraid of mice is a very disturbing idea. WHERE THE HECK DO I GET THIS STUFF? I must have a very whacked out brain.

ASV smashing everything to bits…I like it, but I don't think that it's going to happen in this chapter…

Polite assassins are very rare too.

I was just on the border of Canada in Niagara, but I had a lot of fun in all the cool restaurants and stuff. Also, they have a cute little garden on the shore of Lake Ontario where you can take a cart ride through a bunch of cool BBs as well as a bunch of gift shops. And also, they have a lot of tourists attraction around the falls, and the falls themselves are extremely pretty. They also have a butterfly conservatory in driving distance. And don't get me started on the gardens the have around there. GOR-GEOUS! I bet they're really pretty this time of year too.

Ah, I love to rant. Thank you for the review and the congratulations!

L-Chan the Insignificant

HI L-CHAN! Great to see you! Ah, nothing like warping your mind by web surfing! It's so much fun!

I wonder if Joey's raw, unrelenting stupidy can possibly outwit…General Fluffa-Pies. We'll have to see! Thank you as always for the extremely nice review!

ONTO THE CRAZINESS!

CHAPTER THRITY ONE

If I Only Had an Incredibly Funny Chapter Title

"Now that everyone has been sworn in, the prosecution may now begin its case!" said the Judge. "Representing the prosecution shall be Mr. Walter T. Monkeychunks!"

"Boy, and I thought Seto Kaiba was a sissy name," muttered Johney.

"Johney, shut up!" said Mobster.

"Alright," said Walter T. Monkeychunks, getting up from his chair. "I have recently dug into the records, and this is the file I found on Roma…"

Onto the table on the prosecution side, he tossed a manila envelope the size of a phone book, which spurted massive amounts of paperwork every which way, many labeled with the logo of the FBI.

"While going over every individual crime would take a devastatingly long amount of time, let me read a few crimes that were perpetrated in the last month alone," said Walter T. Monkeychunks. "Speeding ten times, destroying a building by slamming into it with a omnibus, bribing and threatening the police, hacking into a grand total of nine bank computer systems, breaking and entry, tearing tags of mattresses…"

"I told you that was illegal!" said Mobster.

"-illegal operation of what can only be described as the 'Red Dog', panhandling, violation of a grand total of nine illegal actions signed by the Treaty of Soft Cats of 1967, using rude, antler like jesters when referring to the Mayor-"

"But they both have the name Johney, and it can be very confusing!" said Mobster.

"So we have a system," said Johney. "If we are referring to our good mayor, we simply spread out our fingers over our head to signify antlers, and when we are referring to me, we don't."

"Why?" asked Mr. Monkeychunks.

Mobster and Johney were silent for a moment.

"Why did we make that system?" Mobster asked.

"It made sense at the time," said Johney.

"RIGHT!" said Mobster.

"Anyway…the list is quite long, but I'm sure the jury gets my jist. For crying out loud, their Mob Leaders-"

"Objection!" said Double G. "You have no sustainable proof that they are or were in or taking part in the mob or any mob-like activities!"

"Objection sustained," said the judge.

"They have them on their business cards!" said Mr. Monkeychunks, pulling out a business card that said 'Roma and Roma; Delivery Men, Tech Experts, Mob Leaders.'

"Oh…" said Double G.

"Would the defense like to open with a statement?" asked the Judge.

"Well, uh…" said Double G. "Come on! They may have done some bad stuff, like hack into computers, and bribe, and threaten, and bleed money from taxpayer's dollars, and speed down the road with no regard to-"

Seto picked up a pen and rapidly scribbled on a blank sheet of paper, and held it up, revealing it to say 'WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON?'

"Uh, but really, look at the sad state of our economy!" said Double G. "Think of poor Mr. Roma, who has to work so hard to feed poor Mobster, (A/N Insert sad violin music here) and they have to pay rent? Don't you realize how hard that is? Doesn't the end justify the means? Don't you think if you were a single parent who needed extra money would resort to theft and burglary and bribery and odd hand gestures when referring to the mayor and-"

Seto had written on the back of the same paper 'WRAP IT UP NOW!'

"Uh, the defense rests!" said Double G, speeding back to his chair.

"What the heck was that?" Seto whispered violently. "What kind of lawyer are you?"

"I'm sorry!" said Double G. "I'm used to being honest! I'm not good at bending the minds of a court with smooth talk, colorful graphs, and shiny pens!"

"That's why lawyers and businessmen all have to sell their souls and consciences for their profession!" said Mobster. "Dad sold his years ago!"

"This still doesn't look good," said Ryo. "What are we going to do?"

"Just try your best to manipulate the masses to get to your own goal!" said Seto.

"Hooray for stretching the truth!" said Double G.

---ooo---

"EEEYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" said Double S in fright, cowering behind Serenity.

"Ah, Miss Serenity Wheeler, we meet at last," said General Fluffa Pie, floating in the air on his huge, feathery wings. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Thomas Fluffa-Pie, and I am the Head Bunny in the FBBI, the Fuzzy Bunny Bureau of Investigation."

"Your working with Pegasus, I just know it!" said Serenity. "You can do whatever you want with me, but don't you dare touch Double S. When people touch are mean to cute things…I get mad…you wouldn't like me mad…"

"Duly noted," said General Fluffa-Pie. "Our original attempt was to kidnap you, but due to a horrible failure in communication-"

"-you kidnapped Joey," said Serenity.

"When I say horrible, I mean horrible," said General Fluffa-Pie.

"How do I know that you kidnapped Joey, and not some other band of flying, fuzzy bunnies?" asked Serenity.

"Oh please," said General Fluffa Pie. "How many other flying, fuzzy bunnies are there around here?"

"Hi General Fluffa Pie," said a couple of bunnies flying past, wearing business suits and carrying briefcases.

"HI GENERAL FLUFFA PIE!" said a whole bus load of school age flying, fuzzy bunnies passing by on a school bus.

"Sup T?" said a bunch of teen-age flying, fuzzy bunnies, flying past.

"Whoa, how existential can you get?" asked Serenity.

"IGNORE THE IRONY!" screamed General Fluffa-Pie. "If you want proof, here's all the proof you need!"

With that, he threw Ms. Fuzzy-Kins from behind his back, and into Serenity's arms.

"MS. FUZZY-KINS!" Serenity cried, holding up the plushie. "HOW DARE YOU?"

"Now then, if you hand yourself over to Pegasus, we will gladly give you back your pet monkey," said General Fluffa-Pie.

"I've got a better idea," said Serenity. "How would you like to have the possibility of aquiring both me and Joey?"

"Why would I want a brainless person?" asked General Fluffa-Pie.

"You could always warp his tiny mind and make him into your own personal slave or something," said Serenity.

Pause.

"I'm listening…" said General Fluffa-Pie.

"I challenge you to an arcade game of my choice," said Serenity. "Not only will I buy, but if you win, you get both me and Joey. If you lose, however, we both go free. Deal?"

She held out a hand to be shaken.

"You have yourself a bet," said General Fluffa-Pie, slapping a paw in her hand.

---ooo---

"Now the Prosecution shall present its case to the court," said the Judge. "Mr. Monkeychunks, call your witnesses.

"I have no witnesses, I find this case pretty much won," said Mr. Monkeychunks, sitting back in his chair. "It's obvious that their guilty of all these crimes, and they have been running from courts like scared rats for years now, so really, what's there to say?"

"Huh, you got a point," said the Judge.

"Objection! That's being partial!" said Double G.

"OVERULED!" said the Judge.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN OVERULED?" Seto snarled.

"La la la la la, I can't hear you, la la la la la-" said the Judge, sticking his fingers in his ears.

"MORALITY HA-"

"Put that thing away!" said Seto to Double G, who was about to bonk the judge with the Morality Hammer.

"Aw…" said ASV, putting it away.

"Fine then," said the Judge. "Just for laughs, the Defense may present its case."

"Call one of us up as a witness," Seto whispered harshly to ASV.

"But won't Mr. Monkeychunks be expecting that?" asked ASV. "I've got an idea that will guarantee my witness can't be cross-examined."

"You aren't going to do what I think you're going to do, are you?" asked Johney.

"I call Walter T. Monkeychuncks to the stand!" said ASV.

"You're going to call the prosecution attorney to testify for the defence?" Seto asked.

"Don't worry, I have a plan!" said ASV.

"Does that plan involve knocking him out and while all pandemonium breaks loose, grab us and run out of the court and become a fugitive of the law?" Seto asked.

"No, that's plan B!" said ASV.

"Is plan A equally violent?" asked Ryo.

"No, but it involves a lot of manipulating the truth and twisting it for our own use and purposes," said ASV.

"Spoken like a true lawyer!" said Johney.

"Well this is certainly unusual…" said Mr. Monkeychunks, getting onto the stand.

"Mr. Monkeychunks, you put your entire case soundly on a manila file, correct?" said ASV, trying to sound really threatening, but failing miserably. Let's face it, the kid's too cute to be a lawyer.

"Uh…yes?" said Mr. Monkeychunks.

"HA!" said ASV. "But what evidence do you have that every paper in that file is for both of the Romas? You could just be sticking random papers into it!"

A few murmurs of agreement from the stands.

"I assure you, every paper in there is files on both Johney and Mobster Roma," said Monkeychunks.

"Okay," said ASV, pulling out a random paper from the middle of the pile. "Read what's on this paper for me."

"Let's see, report file on Roma, Johney and Roma, Mobster, number B-25257, accused thus of illegal parking on certain date, stealing car on certain date, harassing daytime television on certain date, illegally cuddling soft cats on certain date-" read Monkeychunks.

"Oh, wait, you missed one," said ASV.

"Oh, sorry, prank calling on certain date, illegally cuddling soft cats on-" Monkeychunks continued to read. Suddenly, ASV felt a sharp, dagger-like pain stab in his back, and having read that emergency brochure that one time, knew it could only be the work of a Seto Kaiba Death Glare.

"Um, but what about the other two?" asked ASV, pointing to Ryo, who was happily clicking a pen, and Seto, who was mentally sharpening another dagger. "You have nothing you can possibly accuse them off!"

"The Tooth Fairy and the Albino British Baka?" asked Monkeychunks, pulling out two other folders, except both were pink. "Oh, we got quite a record on both of them. Let's see, on Ryo, there's rampaging with the Ax of Insanity and singing very bad spinoffs of '1985', and under the Tooth Fairy, we have breaking and entry, and being partial."

"Partial? How the heck was he ever partial?" asked ASV.

"Well, when I was five, he gave Jimmy ten dollars, AND HE ONLY GAVE ME TWO!" said Monkeychunks.

"I AM NOT THE TOOTH FAIRY!" screamed Seto angrily.

"Okay, the Defense has no more questions for the witness!" said ASV quickly, before a brawl broke out.

---ooo---

"Okay Double S, you have to stay out here while I go off to save Joey," said Serenity, standing outside an arcade called 'Sock 'Em and Bob 'Em'. "You just need to stay as far away from the game as possible, but not too far. I don't trust these bunnies. They don't fight fair."

"But what about Jean Rose?" asked Ghost Boy.

"Take Ms. Fuzzy-Kins," said Serenity, handing Double S her cat plushie. "She'll protect you!"

"Um…I really don't feel that safe…" Double S said honestly.

"Come on, your on a public street in broad daylight. You'll be fine," said Serenity. "Besides, Ms. Fuzzy-Kins has mad telekinetic powers! She rocks!"

"I hope your right…" Double S said.

"Trust me buddy, you'll be fine," said Serenity, giving him a kind pat on the head, causing him to smile sweetly. (insert big 'AAAAAAAAAW' here) Serenity, then, very bravely, and possibly for the last time, walked into the arcade.

---ooo---

"I see you're brave enough to show your face for the duel," said General Fluffa-Pie. "That won't last very long though. I shall make you quake in fear."

"In your dreams you fluffy bunny!" said Serenity. "You're almost as big a sissy as Peggy!"

"You'll pay for your insolence primate," said General Fluffa-Pie. "Choose your last game!"

"I will," said Serenity. "But first, I want to see that Joey's safe from harm!"

"Ah yes…the stupid one…" said General Fluffa-Pie. "He's right over there."

Joey was playing 'Packman Platinum' with a few off the bunny cadets, and he was just within two thousand points of the high score.

"Alright, for my game then," said Serenity. "This shall be easy! I choose-"

"Wait! Don't say another word my sister," said a very zen-y kind of voice behind her, and then, walking out of the shadows came a punk teenager wearing a pair of greasy black jeans, black nail polish, and several chains and body piercings. He looked so familiar-

"IT'S THE MASTER OF PUTRID YOUTH!" said Joey, turning around from his Packman game just long enough to have his Mrs. Packman character eaten by Pinky.

"That punk kid from the bus?" Serenity asked in confusion. "What are you doing here?"

"You and your friends saved ma behind man," said the Master of Putrid Youth. "Now it's my turn to return the favor!"

---ooo---

"Alright, the last witness didn't go so well, but maybe we can still somehow manipulate the judges verdict," said ASV, as the other four were in a huddle up around the table for the defense.

"Not doing a radical and stupid move comes to mind," said Seto.

"Shut up not-a-British-Person," said Mobster angrily. "How about we call a person who can testify to our good name? You know, like a buddy?"

"He's not on the prosecution is he?" asked Seto sarcastically.

"I SAID SHUT UP!" said Mobster, banging on the head with a spiked club.

"I've got just the person," said Johney. "His name's Hector Mostaccioli. He's a good dude."

"Okay, I'll try my best not to blow it this time. Break!" said ASV, as the five some broke up, and ASV walked up to the witness booth. "I call Hector Mostaccioli to the stand!"

This turned out to be a very stupid move on ASV's part. The second he stood up, he looked exactly like something from a fifties mob flick. He had the black suit, black hat, drawn on looking mustache, a really huge pair of black sunglasses, and was packing in a set of not one, but two holsters.

"Yo, whattup?" he asked, with a heavy Brooklyn accent.

"Uh…please sit down," ASV said, as Hector sat down, extremely scared of what was coming up next. "Mr.…Mostaccioli, I am to believe that you are good friends with Mr. Roma, correct."

"Yeah," said Hector. "We do evretin togethah, cawfee, pokah, house raids-"

"Yes yes yes, we get the point," said ASV, halting the conversation before it got any further. "So um...Johney. Would you consider him a good person? And his daughter?"

"Dats the thing wid us," said Hector. "We sez you give us our money on a certain time, see? Yeh do, we cool. Yeh don't, den you'll see what it's like to-"

"Has he done good things for the community?" asked ASV hastily.

"Yeh could say dat…ya know, helping people and junk with, ya know, escapin' from the l-"

"I HAVE NO MORE QUESTIONS!" ASV finished hastily, trying to push Hector back into his seat.

"Would you like to cross-examine the witness Mr. Monkeychunks?" asked the Judge.

"Just one question your honor," said Mr. Monkeychunks. "Do you have anything else you like to say?"

"Tell fatso there in the back row that if ah don't see a couple of G's out of his pockets quickish, den he's gonna take a long ride to-"

"NO MORE QUESTIONS!" screamed ASV, panicking, and knowing that the defense was getting nowhere fast.

---ooo---

"That Serenity is so mean!" said Jean Rose angrily, stomping down the road in a furry. "I can't believe she'd just run away like that! Oooh, if I ever see her again, I'm going to give her a piece of my-"

Then, she happened to pass by the same arcade that Serenity was in, as a bunch of people walking up and down the street passed by her without a second glance. But she had her eyes fixed on the image of Serenity in the window, talking to the Master of Putrid Youth.

"Oh dear…" said Jean, pulling out a gun from her holster. "I hate to be presumptuous…"

BAM!

Ms. Fuzzy-Kins did a super aerial tackle and jumped onto her face, just in time. But how long could she hold up?

---ooo---

"Huh?" asked Serenity.

"Look out chixor," said TMOPY, "dose bunnies look cutsie, but they got mad skillz. They practice at almost every game in this arcade every night for two hours straight! They know all da moovz."

"Huh? Wouldn't that be a massive waste of quarters?" asked Serenity.

"Dudette, they got sweet connections with the arcade owner, and as they get better, the less quarters they need!" said TMOPY. "They racked up super-mega high scores on 'Skulldugery', 'Deathwire', and 'Motocross Grand Prix'. They even are up on the old stuff like 'Galagala' and 'Packman'. And their badboiz at 'Pong 3000'."

"Curse you Master of Putrid Youth for knowing our secrets!" said General Fluffa-Pie. "May the worms eat your WalMart worker's smock!"

"I don't care if they have the mad moves at all these games," said Serenity. "Somehow, I'll beat them."

"Chill Girl," said TMOPY. "I'm here to tell you how to beat them. Just remember their ultimate weakness. One none of them have the courage to overcome!"

"Of course!" said Serenity. "General Fluffa-Pie, I have chosen my game!"

---ooo---

"Now what? I'm out of ideas!" said ASV to the group again, once again back in a huddle up. "What's worse is that I just took a pole on who's guilty, and it doesn't look good. So far, 99 think were guilty!"

"Well, at least one person thinks we're innocent!" said Ryo.

"Actually no, when I asked one guy, he said 'get away from me you stupid, cutsie, feathery-winged bad lawyer!"

"That strikes me as cold somehow," said Johney.

"Yo smart one, got some crazy idea to save us now?" asked Mobster, still on angry terms with Seto.

"We could always just plead insanity," said Seto, once again in a sarcastic tone.

"THAT'S IT!" screamed Johney. "God, why didn't I think of that?"

"But how? Who do I call up to help pull off the whole insanity thing into perspective?" asked ASV.

"Who indeed…" said Ryo thoughtfully.

"Hey, I think that guy over their looks British," said Mobster.

All the other four looked at her hungrily.

"What?" she asked.

"I call Mobster Roma up to the stand!" said ASV.

"What?" asked Mobster.

"Go, or I take away all of your John Cleese voodoo dolls," said Johney in a threatening tone.

"Alright! Yeesh!" said Mobster, sitting in the testimony chair.

"Mobster, is it fair to assume that you are…legally insane?" asked ASV.

"Hey, I'm not the one who keeps parking in the 'Employees Only' parking spot, claims that his childhood dog friend is still alive despite the fact that he was old when my Dad was a kid, and keeps threatening to sell me either to the Military Catholic Church, the Coal Mine, the Gypsies, or the Pet Loving Martians!" said Mobster. (A/N No people, I'm still not making this up).

"So?" asked Johney.

"But don't you have a tendency to be a tiny bit obsessed with…British People?" asked ASV.

"Oh, so now your brining that up again?" asked Mobster. "YOU PEOPLE ARE SO ONE SIDED! Is that all I'm viewed as? Don't people realize I have a life beyond the British? I have hopes, I have dreams, I HAVE FEELINGS! DANGIIIIIIIIT!"

Mobster inhaled and exhaled angrily in the witness stand.

"If any of you are British in the stands, please raise your hand," said ASV.

"I am!" said some innocent bystander in the back row.

"BRITISH PERSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!" screamed Mobster, doing a super slamming aerial dive hug at the poor, innocent man, who's name shall never be revealed for his safety alone. At that, innocent people suddenly were driven into a chaos, and true to their nature, the Romas created a small riot in the court.

"COURT'S AJOURNED FOR A SHORT RECESS!" said the Judge, fleeing the chaos in a rush.

"I screwed up, didn't I?" said ASV in the midst of the screaming and mêlée, as a florescent light crashed on the ground in front of him.

"Ya think?" asked Roma.

---ooo---

"Mff? Mh-STUPID CAT!" screamed Jean angrily, throwing Ms. Fuzzy-Kins off her face in one mad throw. "Why the heck was I attacked by a plush cat? Oh well…"

"What's going on? I heard a ye-OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS JIMINY CRICKET! IT'S JEAN ROSE!" screamed Double S, walking into the scene in horror, due the fact that he left for a moment throw away a lottery ticket someone had thrown on the ground.

"Oh, it's another mean person who ran away so unkindly!" said Jean, whipping out another gun. "Is this the way you show manners? How could you be so cruel?"

"Yeep! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" said Double S, putting his hands up and slowly backing away. "You wanted to kidnap us, and I got scared and-"

"That's no excuse! You shouldn't just blow people off like that!" Jean said angrily. "That's it! I can't stand to look at you anymore! First you go, then you're friend!"

---ooo---

"Alright, I suppose the jury has made their decision on the case of The Entire Known Universe vs Roma," said the Judge. "And I suppose the verdict will be unanimously guilty?"

Seto nodded, exhausted after the riot, which somehow managed to calm down.

"Please announce your decision then!" said the Judge, as one of the members of the jury, a middle aged woman, stood up, cleared her throat, and read the verdict from a piece of paper.

"We the members of the jury, after taking a long, hard consideration of the case, and after seeing all the evidence presented to us, we find the defense…"

Everyone held their breath. Johney bit his fingernails. Ryo bit his lip. Mobster's leg was wobbling violently. ASV was sweat dropping. Seto was staring at that pen again, and gave up stabbing himself, trading it in for the idea of shoving it down his trachea.

"…innocent of all charges, and may all accusations of them be cleared," finished the woman.

"WHAT!" everyone screamed.

"Why?" asked Seto.

"We can't help it. Your defense lawyer is just too darn cute," said the woman.

"And NOT because the half of the jury against the case was suddenly removed and replaced by mob members. No. Absolute not. Not at all," said some guy who also looked like a mob member.

"HOORAY!" said Ryo.

"We won!" cried ASV.

"Huh?" said Seto, looking up from the pen, not really hearing anything.

---ooo---

"I chose 'Bunny Bashers: Fuzz Attack'!" said Serenity, pointing to a game that looked a little like 'Whack-A-Mole'.

"What?" asked General Fluffa-Pie in anger.

Playing the game was simple. Just pick up the mallet and try to swat as many bunnies that pop up out of the holes as you can in one minute. If you swat the blue bunny, not only do you get a point bonus, a politician breaks its back.

"Alright!" said Serenity, as the little white bunnies started popping up. "DIE!"

BANG!

"DIE!"

BANG!

"DIE!"

BANG!

"DIE!"

BANG!

"BACK BREAKER!"

BANG!

"DIE!"

BANG!

And so it continued, as Serenity mercilessly bashed the plastic bunnies to oblivion, and gave several members of the House of Representatives, two members of the White House Cabinet, and several various members of Parliament massive back wounds. (A/N YAY!)

"Okay…78,284 points…beat it bunnies!" said Serenity.

"You…you have a filthy mind…" said General Fluffa-Pie. "I can't play that sick game! Take your idiot, it's not worth it!"

"Yay! SERENITY!" said Joey, running over to Serenity happily, as his Mrs. Packman character got eaten up by Blinky.

"Joey!" Serenity said happily.

---ooo---

"Wait…you said…you'll hurt Serenity?" asked Double S, staring down the barrel of Jean Rose's gun.

"Yep!" said Jean Rose. "She was no politer than you!"

"You'll…hurt…Serenity…" said Double S, sounding stricken.

"Um…yes?" said Jean.

"HI-YAH!" screamed Double S, doing a lighting fast punch, knocking the gun out of Jean's hands, sending it soaring through the air, and making it land on the other side of a thruway filled with speeding traffic.

"You can do whatever you want to me, BUT I'LL NEVER LET YOU HURT SERENITY! YOU'LL HAVE TO KILL ME FIRST, PIG-DOG!"

"I don't like your tone!" said Jean Rose. However, Double S dive bombed her, sending her colliding into a building. Then, he proceeded to do the garden variety enraged beating up (punching, hitting, slapping, and occasionally a pinch for good measure).

"Alrightalrightalright, I'M GOING!" said Jean, running away in fear of the homicidal winged chibi.

"MAY THAT BE A LESSON TO ALL OF YOU! AAAAAAAAAAAAALL OOOOOOOOFF YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU!"

That's when an overhanging fragment from the wall Jean got slammed into fell down, and cut Double S across the back of his hand.

He looked at it for a second.

"I'M BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIIIIIIIIIIIIING!" he screamed in pain, running into the arcade sobbing at the top of his lungs right to where Serenity and Joey had just re-united.

"Oh…poor baby! What happened?" Serenity asked, as Double S sniffled with huge tears running down his face.

"I got a cut…" he said between sobs.

"AAAAAAW! Let me hug it to make it better!" said Serenity, giving Double S a hug. So the great secret remained of Double S's victory over the most feared and deadly assassins of the Rose Family.

"Hey British Person! Oh, and everyone else…" said Mobster, appearing on the scene with the other four.

"What? You busted out of prison?" asked Serenity, putting a band-aide on Double S's hand.

"Not exactly. We just had a very manipulative lawyer," said Johney.

"Aww, stop!" said ASV, waving it away.

"Well…there's really no way to avoid it now…we have to talk to the wizard…" said Serenity.

"I'm gonna get the Knowledge of Intelligent Smartness!" said Joey happily.

"I'm not gonna be a scardy-cat whimp anymore!" said Ryo happily.

"I can get back home to my Mom!" said Serenity.

"Yeah, whatever," said Seto.

And so, at last, all of our gang, Serenity, Joey, Seto, Ryo, Johney, Mobster, ASV, and Double S all headed off for their final destination. The all knowing Wizard of Cuz, the one that they had gone through happiness, pain, victory, defeat, randomness, bad drama, and so many other things just for one shot at their ultimate dreams.

Or at least, they would have gotten there earlier if it hadn't been for-

"Speed for the last time you cannot cross the bridge there is no way you will get out alive!" said Trixie from the Helicopter.

"I can't I must somehow win the race if I win the race I may find out the true identity of Racer X and-HOLY CRUD!"

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH.

"DUDE! I WAS WALKING THERE!" screamed Seto as the car zoomed by. "STUPID CAN'T-USE-THE-SPEED-LIMIT-OR-PUNCTUATION-MARKS-GIRLY-BOY!"

---ooo---

I can't believe it. We only have a few chapters left in this story. It's drawing close to the last stand between Serenity and her friends. I'm all like 'Finally! Now we're getting somewhere!', but at the same time, I'm also like 'What? No! I don't want it to be over already!' I really have had a lot of fun writing this story, and I'm having fun writing it until the last sentence.

So I figured that since we're running out of chapters pretty darn fast, I figured all I can do now is rant about the characters a little bit. I just feel like doing it to end up a chapter. If you feel like reading any of them, feel free.

Serenity Wheeler

Ah, our darling heroine! Or something like that.

I'm actually really glad I chose Serenity to play the part of Dorothy in the parody. I don't know why, but that fact that Serenity is such and insignificantly minor character appeals to me. It just makes me feel like she really needs to be in a good fanfic. Almost like adopting a sad-looking pet to make sure he or she gets a good, loving home to a kind family. You know, that kind of stuff.

At times I wonder how out of character I went with Serenity. I think to a great extent it's sad that I completely warped her peacefully, cheerful personality. I tried to show a little bit of it in earlier chapters, but ever since Joey kind of showed up…it was a lost cause. However, at the same time, I almost find it's a relief to portray Serenity the way I do. I mean, I really want to believe that there's a little more to her actual personality than just being clueless to the fact that Duke and Tristan are at each others throats for her love. To be honest, I think I put a lot more of that cluelessness into my male characters. They're oh-so-fun to torture.

I think it's really safe to say that she's the sanest of the group, which is odd, because I thought that crown was really going to go to Seto. But at the end, he turned out to be the second most insane person in the group (Joey still has the crown for first place).

I suppose Serenity's personality was designed so that everyone would have an idea of what she was like. I don't really think there's a single way to define it. But she continues to be a fun character to write about, and she continues to surprise me every time I think something up.

Ms. Fuzzy-Kins

To be honest, when I first started the book, Ms. Fuzzy-Kins was a very hastily made character to compensate for the lack of a 'Toto' in the story. At first I believed that I couldn't get very far humor wise with a stuffed animal cat replacing a real, live dog, but noooooo, Ms. Fuzzy-Kins turned out to be a very funny character in herself.

I suppose it was almost fateful that Ms. Fuzzy-Kins would end up as Seto's conscience. She's the direct opposite of what would outwardly be needed to compensate for Seto's lack of heart. While in your mind's eye you see Seto needing a seven foot tall, made of pure muscle and sinew, instead, you get a two foot tall, cuddly plush cat. Also, Ms. Fuzzy-Kins actually managed to acquire her own 'personality', turning into a person nearly as sarcastic and cynical as Seto. I really think it's a match made in heaven. To be honest, a lot of my own cat's personality went into Ms. Fuzzy-Kins.

Ms. Fuzzy-Kins, in my minds eye, is basically a character who 'chooses' to talk to people. She doesn't need to talk to Serenity, because in a very twisted way, I think Serenity understands Ms. Fuzzy-Kins's mind the most, so really, there's no reason for Ms. Fuzzy-Kins to go out of the way to prove her existence. Seto's more difficult, because let's face it, why would a person like him believe a stuffed animal is alive? And is she alive? I have my own view of Ms. Fuzzy-Kins's existence, and I think that the reader has to decide for her or himself what exactly Ms. Fuzzy-Kins is.

Though one thing's for sure, I never thought Ms. Fuzzy-Kins would turn out to be the critical character that she is. You go plushie.

---ooo---

I'll rant about Joey and Seto next chapter.

For a preview, instead of an actual scene, let's tell you what's coming up next! Serenity meets the Wizard of Cuz, Joey has an original idea (OH NO!), and a daring rescue by three clueless people is needed to save Serenity, not to mention all of Cuz! How are they going to pull this one off? AND WILL THEY EVER GET PAST A RECEPTIONIST OF SCARY DOOM?

I know, it's not as good as an actual preview, but your gonna have to deal. Please? Okay, see you next chapter!