Oh Mirror! Oh Mirror! Mr. Mirror…
Hey everyone! How late is this chapter, huh? Anyway, as to any question of why I vanished off the face of the Earth for a couple of days, it turned out that one day, our computer decided it hated us, so we had to take it to Best Buy to get it fixed, and it doesn't help that this chapter is supposed to be a million pages long. Also, due to circumstances beyond my control, the last chapter will be posted on Saturday or Sunday this week instead of Friday. FORGIVE ME!
REVIEW TIME!
LoneFlyinTigers
Hi! I'm kind of hyper myself. I had to eat a lot of sugar this morning to finish up this chapter…
Anyway! Seto and Ryo are kind of babysited the hard way, weren't they? Serenity did lose by a lot, didn't she? I guess that what happens when you fall over in the middle of the match…
I'M SORRY! This is the second to last! But it's super long, so I hope it makes up for it! Um…ENJOY!
ShadowFire2
As if I know! I think they're both clinically insane…
Enjoy this chapter!
Bilbo-Sama
Thank you again for putting up with all my silly questions, as well as my screaming GX-based stupidity. Can't…keep…dub names…straight…I OWE YOU! Okay, how much money do I have…
Fubuki seems very scary…
I wanna go to Hawaii…Uh, I mean, thank you so much for the review! ENJOY THE CHAPPIE!
Funky Egyptian
Poor Scotty…
Today, the secret of why Serenity lost! Oh, and a few other things. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE REVIEW! Enjoy this chappie!
Mokuba's Official Glomper
Seta is doomed to show up again in the next fic I'm going to write called 'There's Something About Marik'. As is ASV. I'm trying to work Mobster in.
Oh great, now Seta is running around screaming 'Yu-Jyo' and 'Tomadachi' to everyone she sees, and this is the second time today I had to pull Mobster off of Daniel Radcliff.
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT YOU'LL WRITE MAYBE SOON! Thank you for the review, and enjoy this chappie please!
Keruha Digifox
Cool penname! And I'm glad you and your friends like this fanfic so much! Sniff…it makes me very happy.
No, I do that with stories all the time. Mostly because I am often to preoccupied, or lacking a long enough attention span, to review at times. I hope you enjoy this chappie, as well as the rest of the story!
Princess Mika of the Shadows, Yami, Marik, Ryo, and Kyo
Kyo really has issues, doesn't he?
Peggy dancing is a scary thing. And thank you again for being on my side Yami. Rotten rip-off Pegasus. He really needs a life.
Ah, the evil cliffy will be solved! Don't worry! Marik, please keep out of trees. THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Mizz-Serenity-Wheeler
Getting up at 5 AM any day is a scary thing for anyone. Seta and the agents was one of my favorite parts to write actually.
I actually like Smoke on the Water a lot too. No, I've never seen Noir before. Is it good? Maybe I will.
Pink Dinosaur…I'd like to hear that.
Anyway, thank you for the review, and so early in the morning! I hope you enjoy the second-to-last-chappie!
Gothangelmyu
SETA ROCKS! Sorry, I love the characters that I use to cause pain…
Anyway, I'm glad you liked it when Seto got his brain removed. I see Seto drooling in my minds eye as well, as well as maybe moaning 'guuuuuuuuuuuuuh' or something like that. I think it would have been funnier if Joey found Seto first, and became best friends with his brainless body or something…
Anyway, thank you for the kind review! Enjoy this chappie as well!
Amarie Mariel
HOORAY! TRISTAN'SONEANDONLYFANGIRL GOT A PENAME! (Cheers)
Of course Seto eats sugarless! He's so boring, he's the kind of person who eats his toast with nothing on it! He probably is allergic to fun…
Maybe I should write a fic about a bunch of fangirls babysitting the Yu-Gi-Oh cast. It sure would be a hoot…
Anyway, thanks for the review! Aw…I'll be upset when this story ends too. I hope you like the chappie.
Lefthandedfreak and Josh the Figment Man
Hi guys!
Anyway, that's why you should ask the camera man, 'do you know how to operate a camera?'. Hee hee, anyway, I'm still very flattered by the idea that you've put so much work into it!
It's strange, but I don't feel that weirded out by Joey in woman's clothing either. Curious…and you're probably right about the curse.
I can't believe Seto doesn't have anit-virus/brain stealing programming! What's with him? He must be a loony…
Seta, truly the deadliest of all girly-girl female characters! That happens when you're clinically insane…ANYWAY! Have fun being babysited JFM! And I hope both of you love the chappie!
Serenity-yugioh-fan05
THANK YOU!
Fuzzy Bunny
Pouring grapejuice down people's pants…both funny and scary…
I agree. I think while everyone deep down wants to kick Seto, I think deep down, everyone likes to do something nice to him once in a while…then kick him again. Yes, we are truly all Seto fan-girls.
I'm not surprised why I got the question whether or not Seta was the daughter of Tea and Seto…
Actually, YES! I do plan to do a new story! It's called 'There's Something About Marik' and it's going to be just as crazy as this story! I hope you read it!
Thank you for the review! Enjoy the chappie!
Catipult Turtle
Asuka was actually a big inspiration when it came to Seta, and I actually want to include her in the cast of my next fic because I like her so much.
What a coincidence! That was how it was going to end! Don't worry, I fixed it at the last moment for you. KIDDING! I hope you enjoy the rest of this story, and thanks for plowing through this, even coming into it late.
Pointe master
BEHOLD! An update! Thank you so much for the words of encouragement. Believe me, they mean a lot to me!
Onto the Craziness!
CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE
If I Only Had Trenchy and Sir Fountleroy Fauxchiliron III
"Ow…my head hurts so much…" said Serenity, slowly opening up her eyes in bed, while her vision slowly cleared up. However, when she did, the first person she saw was-
"MOM!" Serenity cried in shock, as her mom stood at the end of Serenity's bed, in Serenity's room, in Serenity's plane of reality. "Oh Mom! Thank God! I had the weirdest dream on the planet! I was in this freaky dimension, and I got landed with these Ruby Platform Straps, and I was running around with a brainless loony, a heartless freak, and a cowardly not-quite-albino person! And…and…"
"Um actually, that wasn't a dream," said Serenity's Mom.
"Whah?" asked Serenity.
"This is the dream, used to create a subconscious but heartbreakingly cruel irony," said Serenity's Mom. "You're still stuck in Cuz."
"Oh…fab…" said Serneity.
"Well, be seeing you," said Serenity's Mom, snapping her fingers.
---ooo---
"LEFT RIGHT UP LEFT-DOWN COMBO!" said Serenity, suddenly snapping awake to find that she was actually in Mai's apartment, sleeping in Mai's bed in Mai's room, shooting right up in bed.
"Serenity, calm down, the games over," said Mai, pushing right back down into the pillows. "You passed out and…Pegasus won round two."
"This is terrible…" said Serenity.
"OH MY GOD SHE'S DEAD!" screamed Joey, bursting through the door to Mai's room, running over to Serenity's bed, and sobbing heartbrokenly at the foot of it.
"You boob, she just passed out," said Mai.
"I COULDN'T SAVE HER!" screamed Joey. "SERENITY! WHEREVER YOU ARE! FORGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"Joey…I'm okay…" said Serenity, but before she could say anything else, Mai grabbed by his shirt collar and the back of his pants and chucked him out of the bedroom with one swing.
"I figured it would be better if the guys didn't bug you tonight," said Mai.
"I can't remember what happened to me…" said Serenity, gripping her forehead. "It's all a huge void…does anyone know what happened?"
"Not as far as I can tell…" said Mai.
"Great…I just pass out in the middle of the game for no good reason at all…I bet the guys all hate me…" said Serenity.
---ooo---
"Poor Serenity!" said Ryo, sitting on the same couch as Seto. "Serenity got the crud beat out of her while trying to help us, and we couldn't do a single thing to help her! She must hate us!"
That's when Joey got thrown out of Mai's room.
"Any news?" asked Ryo to Joey, who was collapsed on the floor.
"CHEESE!" screamed Joey.
"Yep, just as I expected…" said Seto. "Something's not right. The exact same thing happened to me when I was facing Pegasus…this can't be a coincidence."
"Jeez, it's kind of obvious, isn't it?" said Joey to Seto. "What do I have to do, spell it out for you stupid Tooth Fairy?"
Silence.
"I'm going to trust that Joey had a lapse of unintelligence…" said Seto.
"My name's Joey!" Joey said.
"You had a DDR match against Pegasus?" said Ryo. "Oh! So that's how you landed in the hospital! Serenity could get really hurt next! We need to do something!"
"I HAVE A PLAN!" said Joey. "But you have to follow it exactly and do whatever I do!"
"That would make me a second generation Son of Sam, wouldn't it Mutt?" said Seto. "Nope, sorry, I've got a bone to pick with Pegasus, so I'm going to his castle alone to get to the bottom of this."
"I want to come too!" said Ryo.
"No, I don't take pansies or stupid mutts," said Seto.
"But what if he kicks your butt again?" asked Ryo.
"Ryo, if I couldn't stop my butt from being kicked, what, and I mean what, makes you think you can?" asked Seto.
The Jeopardy theme song played in the background as Ryo sat down and thought about it.
"Time's up," said Seto. "Sorry, looks like I'm going at this on my own."
"Oh here we go again with this silly 'lone wolf' tendency of yours," said Ms. Fuzzy-Kins, who suddenly appeared on Seto's shoulder. "This is getting a little old this late in the story, don't you think?"
"WHAT IS IT NOW YOU STUPID PLUSHIE?" screamed Seto angrily, as Ryo and Joey both looked at Seto with the 'oh no, he's gone nuts again' look.
"Oh, just the usual, your sickening stubbornness, the fact that you want to do everything by yourself even if you get killed in the process, all that jazz," said Ms. Fuzzy-Kins. "And don't shout, I'm not deaf, and your friends think you're insane. Just let them go, it's not like their hurting anything."
"Not…the stupid…Mutt…" said Seto.
"Fine, you can leave him behind, but at least take Ryo, he's a pretty helpful kid by and by," said Ms. Fuzzy-Kins.
"Ryo, you can come as long as you shut up and not do anything, and you can't come at all Joey," said Seto sternly.
"WHO DIED AND MADE YOU KING OF THE PLANET YOU SOULESS FILTH OF A MAN?" asked Joey evilly.
"You can stay here and guard Serenity from trouble Joey!" said Ryo sweetly.
"Sweet!" said Joey, getting in a dramatic pose, one foot forward, eyes somehow looking sharp, one hand shading his eye dramatically, as if he was about to discover something really important, valuable, life changing, etc.
"Alright, before we get into anything dramatic, do you have anything black you can wear?" asked Seto to Ryo. "As if the white hair and pale skin wasn't enough…"
"Nope!" said Ryo cheerfully.
"Hooray, we're dead," said Seto, as Joey, still frozen, tipped over onto the floor.
---ooo---
"So do you think she won't be able to compete tomorrow?" asked General Fluffa-Pie to Pegasus, who was using a hair straightener on his hair, to make sure it was thin, grey, and shiny. "She went down pretty hard…"
"I agree, but as you know General Fluffa-Pie, I am not a man to take chances," said Pegasus, flipping through his latest issue of 'Cosmopolitan'. "So I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to take a couple of your agents to finish the job…you know, in case things haven't worked out as planed…oh, and tell them not to be afraid to get rough, spin control will handle anything too messy."
"According to sources, the only person who will be guarding her tonight is Miss Mai and Joey the Monkey Boy," said General Fluffa-Pie. "What team do you suggest we use?"
"Nothing to severe," said Pegasus. "Just wait for Mai to leave the apartment for a short duration of time. The monkey won't be too tough a nut to crack after that, and I'm sure a girl sick in bed won't provide too drastic a threat either."
"Yes sir," said General Fluffa-Pie.
---ooo---
"For a castle, their security is pretty sad," said Seto, once again hidden on the outskirts of Pegasus's castle ground, watching through the bushes. "Those stupid bunnies probably think they've got everything won and are out partying somewhere. Those brainless little rodents…"
"You're not referring to Joey again are you?" asked Ryo.
"Okay, we can't use the bunny suit idea to sneak in again…we can't risk them expecting it," said Seto. "Do you have any ideas?"
"We could knock and ask politely to be let in!" Ryo said. "Everyone knows that if you ask politely, you shall receive!"
"And while we're up, we can ask them if we can borrow some sugar I suppose," said Seto darkly.
"Oh no! We're good on sugar!" said Ryo, holding up a small bag of sugar he always kept at his side in case there was some drastic need for a cake to be baked.
"I must check to see if Joey's died when I get back and if your channeling him," said Seto.
"Or we can just hop on the back of that carrot delivery truck that's heading straight for the gates," suggested Ryo, pointing to a huge truck with the label 'Carrot Delivery Truck and Possible Means of Sneaking Into the Castle of a Screaming Loony'.
"Okay, the label's a little much," said Seto. "But the next problem is how are we going to make the truck stop long enough for us to sneak on?"
"I've got it!" said Ryo. "Why don't we…ask it politely to stop?"
"Okay, how are we going to make the truck stop long enough for us to sneak on in a way that isn't stupid?" asked Seto.
"I wish Serenity was here so she could recite the incredibly dark verse of wisdom that makes any mortal man faint instantly," said Ryo sadly.
"Ryo, you idiot, you're a genius!" said Seto.
"What?" Ryo asked.
"We may not have the incredibly dark verse of wisdom that makes any mortal man faint instantly, but we do have something else," said Seto. "Something just as effective…"
"…AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII WANT A TV EM-BRACE, AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII I'M GETTING OFF YOUR BOILING PLACE," sung the truck driver to 'Cigarettes will Kill You' (which I don't own people) as he bumped down the road joyfully with his fat load of carrots. "I WISH I COULD SAY THAT EVERYONE WAS-hey! What's that stupid teenager in a trench coat doing in the middle of the road?" He put down the brake and honked the horn. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING? YOU'LL GET YOURSELF-AAAAAAAAAAAACH!"
With that, he completely collapsed on the steering wheel.
"You death glared him, didn't you?" asked Ryo, covering his eyes, too scared to look.
"Yes, but I moderated the intensity of it so that he should only be knocked out for about five minutes," said Seto. "He'll probably just think he dosed off or something."
"My God, you're a scary person…" said Ryo.
---ooo---
"GUAR-DIN SER-EN-IH-TEE! GUAR-DIN SER-EN-IH-TEE! OH YEAH! OH YEAH! OH YEAH!" said Joey, who was backward and forward in front of the door to Serenity's room, composing a song thus called 'Guarding Serenity', which so far he had successfully created two lines for the song. Well, actually, it was more like one.
"Joey," said Mai, walking out of the room. "What—are—you--doing?"
"Guardin' Serenity!" Joey said in a sing-song voice.
"You do realize that this entire apartment is charmed to let no one enter, right?" asked Mai.
"Huh?" asked Joey.
"Never mind," said Mai. "I'm going to go to the store to pick up some dinner for us. I'll be right back, okay?"
"GUARDIN' SERENITY!" sung Joey.
"Good for you," said Mai, picking up her purse on the way to the door, shutting it behind her, understanding now where Seto was coming from. Alas, poor Mai didn't realize that as she walked away from the apartment to get something to eat, she was leaving Joey and Serenity in critical danger, for hidden outside behind a bunch of garbage cans was three of the Fuzzy Bunny Hoards most powerful hit men, and they watched hungrily as Mai walked out the door.
---ooo---
"Well, I don't know how that worked, but it did," said Seto, who was currently squeezed in a huge crate of carrots with Ryo. "Now all we need to do is wait for the bus to stop, then we can head to the core of this castle to find the secret of the DDR machines."
"And these carrots are absolutely delicious!" said Ryo, happily eating one. "So sweet, so crisp, and so juicy! I must know the supplier…"
Just then, with the screech of breaks straining to break the massive, carotene laden truck to a halt, the truck slowed until it eventually stopped, presumably in the unloading dock.
"Hey man, wanna leave the truck, letting any possible stowaways out free?" asked a random bunny to the driver.
"Sure!" said the driver, as the two chatted about random things, offering to pay for each other's carrot juice drinks, as they slowly grew more distant from the truck, before vanishing altogether.
"Finally," Seto said, throwing off the top of the crate and pulling open the back of the truck.
"Uh oh…" Ryo said.
"What…now?" asked Seto.
"My shoes caught on a loose nail jetting out of one of the boards!" said Ryo
"Well get it out!" Seto said angrily.
"I can't…" said Ryo. "Every time I try, I twist my ankle and it hurts!"
"Well what do you want me to do?" asked Seto angrily.
"You could try to help me try…" said Ryo. "Maybe if we flip the crate on its side…"
"God Ryo," said Seto bitterly, walking over to the crate to try to push it on its side, which wasn't an easy task because the crate was not only heavy already, it was full of carrots and Ryo. After much straining, slowly but surely, the crate tipped over, spilling out many carrots as it did, as Ryo let out a small cry of surprise as he thudded to the floor.
"Now can you get it out?" asked Seto angrily.
"No, I'm still stuck…" said Ryo, managing to get up on one foot, but still having the other one stuck.
"Then just take your bloody shoe off!" said Seto, starting to feel very glad that he only too Ryo along, feeling he might not be able to handle whatever Joey's brain particle can dish out on top of Ryo.
"I tried, but it's still stuck, and if I try to hard, I'll get scratched by the nail!" said Ryo. "I DON'T WANT TO GET A TETANUS SHOT!"
"Your doing this on purpose, aren't you?" asked Seto, who grabbed Ryo roughly by the wrist and completely yanked him out as hard as he can in sheer anger, which actually wasn't a good thing. He pulled Ryo so hard that Ryo was instantly freed, but Ryo's entire body toppled on his own, sending them both falling out of the truck, landing hard on their heads on the solid concrete floor.
"Thanks…Seto…" said Ryo, twitching in pain as little duckies spinning around his head.
"Oh…my head…" said Seto in a sick tone of voice. However, just as they thought things couldn't get any worse, the crate of carrots that Seto pulled Ryo out of was dragged right to the edge of the truck, and as usual, karma/gravity came into play, as it slid right onto Seto's back as he got up, causing him to yell in pain and confusion and trip into Ryo, who was shoved into the wall, where very inconveniently, a circuit board was, causing his face to smash into it and all the lights to go out in the building.
"OW!" Ryo cried in pain. "My shoe's ruined, I've got a headache, my hair's stuck in the circuit board, AND NOW IT'S DARK! WAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
"I wonder if I can bang my head hard enough on the floor for it to kill me…" wondered Seto.
---ooo---
"Jeez, I can't believe Serenity Wheeler's security team is this pathetic," commented one of the bunnies as was in the kitchen fixing himself a sandwich, feeling rather hungry after skipping around the front door singing his song. However, due to the fact that he burnt out his taste buds years ago, his sandwich now consisted of two scoops of strawberry ice cream, tomato slices, instant cup ramen, raw eggs, ketchup, wafer cookies, maple syrup, tuna, peanut butter, coffee grounds, mustard, relish, marshmallow fluff, and potato chips, all squeezed between two pancakes.
"Stop gapping," said another member of the team. "Let's just decommission her and do it quick!"
So the tree-bunny-hit-team snuck past the kitchen where Joey was, who was singing the theme song to 'Air' (A/N Did I mention what a scary person Joey is?) while slapping on some jam to his sandwich masterpiece, occasionally muttering 'my jam…all for Joey…'
Anyway, the bunnies made it to the room where Serenity was, who was currently sleeping peacefully in bed, and were attempting to open up the door, which turned out to be locked.
"Dangit!" said a bunny in a hushed-but-angry voice. "This door has a unlocking-proof charm on it! We're going to need our big guns!"
"Right," said a bunny, pulling out the FBBI standard issue Magical Charm Breaking Plasma Cannon of Death.
---ooo---
"Mff…mer, my cream cheese…" said Joey, who was currently burring his face in the cream cheese, happily stuffing huge handfuls of it into his mouth.
"Joey…Joey Wheeler…" said a soft, mystical kind of voice behind him. Joey stopped eating the cream cheese in horror, realizing that someone caught him pilfering all of it.
"I'M SORRY MAI!" said Joey, his face covered in white, sticky cream cheese.
"No you foolish boy," said Joey, suddenly realizing that it wasn't Mai who was talking to him, but the Eggplant of the Brawn from Chapter Thirty Four. "I am the Eggplant of the Brawn from Chapter Thirty Four-"
Did I not just say that?
"QUIET!" said the eggplant to the narrator. "Joey Wheeler, you friend Serenity is in grave danger. Her room is being raided by three of Pegasus's hit-bunnies, who are going to try to wound her even more so she'll be forced to forfeit the match tomorrow! You must do something!"
"10:34, why?" asked Joey.
"Oh dear, I hope I still know how to speak idiot," said the eggplant. "Um…WOOT! APPLE DUMPLING ARE SQUISHY…hey, smell my feet. APRICOTS!"
Subtitles: Help! A bunch of bunnies are going to do something terrible to your best friend, and if you don't do something fast, it will be too late!
"DETROIT!" Joey cried in horror.
Subtitles: Zounds! How could I be so foolish? How could I possibly forsake my friend and my duty in such a way? Fear not Serenity! I'm coming to save you!
With that, grabbing the mystical piece of produce, Joey charged off to make sure Serenity was okay, leaving a trail of jam and cream cheese behind him.
---ooo---
"Almost…done…" said one of the bunnies, who was almost done frying the door clean off it's hinges, which was a difficult task, due to the strength of Mai's charm.
"Okay boys, you know what to do?" said one of the bunnies.
"Yup!" said the other two.
"Alright," said the first. "Let's do-"
"NOT SO FAST, FOUL BUNNIES!" said Joey heroicly, hopping into the hallway, wearing a pair of underwear over his jeans, a mask, and a towel superhero cape. "FOR DARING TO HURT A POOR, INNOCENT DDR PLAYER IN HER SLEEP, YOU SHALL FACE THE WRATH OF…BUTT MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!"
"Oh please," said one of the bunnies. "Oh well, I suppose we can deal with this loony.
"Never underestimate the power of insanity!" said Joey. "PREPARE TO FEEL THE DERRIERE OF DEMOLITION EVIL RODENTS!"
"Oh yeah, what are you going to do?" said one of them.
"THIS!" said Joey, pulling out his homemade jam launcher, which he built in seventh grade technology class.
"OH MY GOD! HE'S GOT STRAWBERRY JAM!" screamed one of the bunnies in horror, as all of them turned to flea, but-
"YES!" said Joey.
-it was too late, for Joey started to fire the launcher, and balls of jam started to fling themselves at eighty miles per hour each at the bunnies, hitting them, exploding on contact, throwing them against the wall and gluing them to it, and overall making a huge, sticky mess in Mai's apartment. Joey was laughing like a lunatic all through it. How Serenity managed to sleep through all that dim is beyond me.
Anyway, it only took a few minutes for the bunnies to all be lying in mix-matched heaps, all groaning in exhaustion at all places in the hallway, all of their nice, clean, white fur completely saturated by the jam. One by one, Joey picked them up by the ears as he walked past, opened the door, and chucked them all out into the garbage can outside.
"MAY THAT BE A WARNING TO ALL OF YOU, YOU FILTHY ANIMALS!" said Joey, as a pair of giraffes, a hippo, and a pig passing by turned an angry eye at him as he slammed the door shut.
"Well that was easy!" said Joey. "Huh…those meanies tried to hurt Serenity. But that means that if they want to hurt Serenity…THEY MAY TRY TO HURT RYO AND THE TOOTH FAIRY!"
With that, Joey ran upstairs, charged out of a window on the third floor of the apartment complex, shattering it as he fell to Earth and landed flat on his stomach, getting up, and running down the roat.
"DON'T WORRY GUYS!" said Joey, running down the road, unknowing that he had a huge hole torn in his pants, showing off his Barney boxer shorts. "I'M COMING!"
---ooo---
"Seto…I can't-OW!-I can't see anything!" said the Ryo eyes again, blindly walking around in the dark, bumping into the wall for the nineteenth time. "Seto…are you there? SETOOOOO!"
"I'm right here Ryo…" said Seto eyes coldly.
"I can't take this!" said Ryo, who was hyperventilating, gasping for air with huge, racking breaths in pure horror. "It's way too dark! It's too easy to lose each other! What are we gonna do?"
"Well what do you want me to do?" asked Seto. "I mean, I can't just suddenly light up!"
"Let's hold hands!" Ryo said.
Heavy silence.
"No," said Seto in a dark, almost evil tone of voice.
"But then we won't lose each other!" said Ryo.
"Ryo, no, no, and NO!" said Seto.
FOUR SECONDS LATER
"This never leaves the castle Ryo, or I swear I'll do something that is grounds for this story being raised to T," said Seto, whose hand was limp, being held by Ryo's as they both walked down the hall in complete darkness.
"Okay, now which way should we go?" asked Ryo as they both walked down the hall.
"I don't know Daniel Boon, you tell m-OW!"
Seto's face got slammed into a wall. Then there was an awkward pause.
"WATCH OUT FOR THAT WALL!" Ryo cried.
"Ryo, I hope you don't pursue a career in operating heavy machinery," said Seto, unsticking his face from the wall.
"Hey Seto, this feels like a sign!" said Ryo, feeling a wall on the opposite side of the hallway, across from Seto's wall. "Um…hey Seto, you're smart, can you read Braille? It's on the opposite wall from you."
"Whatever," said Seto, walking to the other end of the hallway, feeling the wall with his free hand until he got to the sign that Ryo was indicating. "I'm a little rusty but…okay, it says 'North Wing…living chambers, West Wing…Origami, wait, Karaoke Bar, East Wing: Secret Training and Development Rooms, Extremely private, enter and die."
"So we're heading to East Wing?" asked Ryo.
"No, we're heading for the karaoke bar," said Seto sarcastically.
"How will that help?" asked Ryo.
"There goes that inability to detect sarcasm again…" said Seto darkly.
---ooo---
So after creeping down the hallway, while bumping into far less walls than they did earlier, our heroes managed to make it to their destination…THE KARAOKE BAR! Uh, I mean, the mysterious East Wing.
"Any one of these rooms could have the secret of the DDR machines…" said Ryo. "Where the heck are we going to start? And what are we going to do about this dark?"
"I think we should start by hiding," said Seto, as a pair of flashlights shown in the dark, slowly getting closer. Before he could say anything else, Ryo yanked him into a room at their side, as a pair of bunnies walked by them with their flashlights.
"Hm…" said Seto. "I have a cunning plan."
"Which means that one of us is going to get hurt very soon, right?" asked Ryo.
"No, but they are," said Seto, jumping out of the room, and with the sounds of a small struggle coming from outside, with a few bites, kicks, and squeaks of panic, Seto came back into the room triumphantly with a pair of flashlights.
"Torch?" said Seto, offering Ryo one.
"Uh…what happened to the bunnies?" asked Ryo, reluctantly taking it.
"What bunnies?" Seto asked evilly, as Ryo turned on his and started to look around.
The room turned out to be some sort of filing room, with all kinds of filing cabinets around it, full to bursting with manila files of all labels and kinds. Ryo began fishing in one, which turned out to be nothing but episode summaries of 'Kiddy Grade', while the next turned out to be the same for 'Cowboy Bebop', 'Naruto', and 'One Piece'.
"Nothing but Anime summaries in this one…" Ryo said weakly.
"What? Same as mine!" asked Seto, who was going through a different filing cabinet. "And…there's some in this one too! And this one!"
"Uh…Seto?" said Ryo, who had stepped outside for a minute. "The sign over the door to this room says 'Anime Summary Filing'.
"My god, why do we get such a lame villan?" asked Seto, walking out. "Alright, what's with the other rooms?"
"Uh, this one says 'Beanie Baby Collection', this one says 'Home Movies', this one says 'Pet Mice'-" said Ryo, flashing his flashlight on all of the signs on top of all of the door.
Seto's eye began twitching again.
"-and this one says 'Secret Stuff about the DDR machines…" said Ryo.
"That the one," said Seto, pointing to the last one.
"Perfect!" said Ryo, walking into the last room, afterwards wishing he didn't. The entire room was full of complex machinery that was sparking rather unpleasantly. There were several scrawled notes lying on the floor in computer lingo, copies of DDR music, a book called 'Kick-A DDR Moves For Pleasure and Profit', and that was just the normal stuff. There was deffinatly and 'Occult' feel about the room, because it was littered with all kinds of magical voodoo items on the floor, including voodoo dolls of our heroes, evil looking scrolls that look like they were written in blood, odd books with berserk, evil symbols, that just by looking at them Ryo felt like he was sinking into his own body.
"I don't like this place…" Ryo said uneasily, then screaming when he saw the skeleton on the floor. However, his mood quickly changed when he saw, sticking out of the skeleton's mouth, a role of blueprints. Ryo pulled them out, unrolled them, and smiled in triumph.
"I found them!" he said. "Huh…can't make out this design though…"
"Let me see," said Seto, snatching it out of Ryo's hand without a second thought and/or a word of politness. "AH HA! Just as I thought. The game is rigged!"
"How?" asked Ryo.
"According to this plan, there's supposed to be a very complicated shocking device in the harness of the opposing player. There's a control center located somewhere outside the stadium, and by command, it can activate the mechanism and shoot a subliminal electric shock through your entire body, enough to make you collapse, and even sustain some serious damage depending on the voltage level!"
"So that's what they did to you!" said Ryo. "Then that means that he hurt Serenity really bad if he wants too!"
"Not to mention she's doomed to lose!" said Seto. "We got to get this back to her qui-"
"Well, well, well," said Pegasus's voice behind them, as Ryo and Seto each felt a hand land on their shoulder. "What do we have here? A couple of restless night owls?"
Ryo let out a squeak of horror.
"Blast…" muttered Seto.
---ooo---
"Are you sure your okay Serenity?" asked Mai, while Serenity was walking halfheartedly to the door of Mai's apartment to drive to the stadium. "Forgive me for saying this, but you look like death wormed over."
"I'm fine…" Serenity muttered, walking down the steeps to the street. "Are you sure you couldn't find the others?"
"No," said Mai. "Seto and Ryo went off earlier for some reason and never came back, and I left Joey at home to get some dinner, and when I got back, the entire apartment was painted over in jam and he was missing."
She looked over Serenity inceptively. Serenity, while still washed, dried, and brushed at the last minute, seemed to look like she had already lost. Her eyes seemed much darker, lacking the spark of confidence. In fact, it was like there was no light shining in them at all. She looked rather pale and weak on her feet as she climbed into Mai's blue convertible, even her cheeks looked a little bit sunken. It looked almost as if she had just recently gotten over a cold.
"Classic Joey," said Serenity, as Mai started the car. "This scrubs. I feel dead, Seto and Ryo have gone to who knows where, and Joey had a jam-based conniption and probably went of after them, and we'll find him in two weeks wandering around somewhere miles from here without a shirt!"
"I hope you aren't going to let this get you down," said Mai, giving her a smile, as well as slamming her foot on the gas pedal. "Today is the day you win Serenity. I don't know how, but I've never been more confident in anyone's skills more than yours!"
"But I lost last time…" said Serenity, trying to yell over the sound of the air resistance against Mai's car, which was moving not far from the speed of sound, as well as the blare of a state trooper behind them. "And look at the bets…"
"Hey, everyone loses one," said Mai, also at a loud volume, throwing a random brick from her feet to knock out one of the state troupers, who was now having to pick up speed as Mai began to gun it. "I know this isn't going to be easy, and I have no freakin' clue why the guys aren't here, but come on…after all those times you thought you lost one, after all those times you did, you somehow found a way to get back up again and win…and why should this time be any different?"
"But this is the final game…" said Serenity.
"Strip away all that game glitz, the bets, the souvenir mugs, and all the hype and commentary, and what have you got?" asked Mai. "All of this is nothing more than a DDR game to help your friends…and isn't that all that matters? And so far, you've done, you've all done, a fantastic job of pulling each other through the mess around here, and I have no doubt you can do it one more time."
"Yeah…I guess you're right," said Serenity. "But can you try to find the others anyway? I'm worried that they're going to do something stupid."
"Right away," said Mai, punching a guy who had managed to get to the same speed as her, and was about to tell her to pull over, causing him to skid of the road and into some bushes not far from the road. "Once I drop you off, it's off to find the idiots!"
---ooo---
"Seto, in all reasonable contexts, are we doomed?" asked Ryo to Seto, who were both stuffed in a cell in Pegasus's Castle, where they had been all night. "Serenity's game starts in an hour! We have to get out of here!"
"Hang on, I almost have it…" said Seto, who was making a shock breaker out of rocks, dirt, and a pair of forks, which should stop the shock waves in Serenity's harness once activated, which he managed to design after a quick glimpse of the plans.
"WAIT! I HAVE AN IDEA!" cried Ryo, spinning around. "You can squeeze your weightless body through the bars like you did before!"
"THERE WE GO WITH THE WEIGHT THING!" yelled Seto angrily.
"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?" Ryo said with huge, cute eyes.
"Fine," said Seto in a dark, angry voice, putting down the shock breaker and walking through the bars. It looked like our heroes were home free, except.
"Darn it…my trench coat's stuck," said Seto, try to tug his gravity-defying trench coat through the bars.
"Well take it off…" said Ryo.
"NO!" Seto screamed, hugging the tail end of it. "Not Trenchy!"
"You named your trench coat Trenchy?" Ryo asked.
"…yes…" said Seto, slinking back into the cell.
"THAT'S SO UNCREATIVE!" said Ryo, pointing to his sweater. "My sweater's name is Sir Fountleroy Fauxchiliron III!"
CRASH!
With that, straight through the roof, outside of the bars that held our dynamic (ish) due captive, our hero, Joey A.K.A Butt Man landed hard on his rear right in front of our two heroes.
"FEAR NOT CITIZENS!" he screamed, getting up with a heroic pose. "I am…BUTT MAN!"
"Joey! You came to save us!" said Ryo happily.
"Oh my God…I'M GLAD HE CAME! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" yelled Seto in self-loathing.
"I'm not Joey!" Joey said. "I AM BUTT MAN!"
"Joey, this is important!" said Ryo. "If you don't stop the DDR match in time, Serenity's going to lose! Pegasus is cheating, and he's using a shock-based system to stop her, and out of control, she could really get hurt!"
"OH NO!" Joey cried. "This looks like a job for…BUTT-"
"SHUT UP ALREADY!" screamed Seto, shoving Joey a crude looking kind of electronical device. "Listen go give Serenity and Mai this Portable Shock-Wave Breaker and this note, and don't waste any time getting there being stupid!"
"Give what to who?" Joey asked.
Seto slapped his forehead.
"Joey…give this to Mai and Serenity, and fast!" said Ryo, talking in a slow, 'My-God-Joey-Just-Try-To-Understand-What-We're-Saying voice.
"First I gotsta save you!" said Joey, pulling out a rubber chicken.
"Joey, you don't have much time! Hurry!" said Ryo.
"Huh?" Joey said.
"BEAT IT YOU STUPID MUTT!" screamed Seto, chucking a loose piece of brick at Joey's hallow head.
"Stupid Seto!' Joey yelled, running out of the cell carrying the electronical device, as well as the note, out of the cell, but as usual, he didn't believe in doors, so he just plowed through it, leaving a huge, Joey shaped crater in it. What's new?
"I guess some things just don't change…" said Ryo.
"Wait…the Mutt said my name…" said Seto in realization. "OH MY GOD! JOEY SAID MY NAME! NOT 'THE TOOTH FAIRY'! MY NAAAAAAAAAAME!"
Seto was bathing in a combination of shock, confusion, and near-bliss from this revelation, as Ryo wondered if anyone was truly sane in this story.
---ooo---
"Are you sure you'll be okay Mai?" Serenity asked, as Mai looked at her over the driver's side door of her convertible, which Serenity had only a few minutes before gotten out of, as she waited in front of the stadium.
"How can you ask me that when you're about to KO at any minute?" asked Mai.
"For the last time, I'm fine," said Serenity.
"Whatever…just play to win kid, and don't worry, I'll find your senseless friends," said Mai with an encouraging wink. "Don't make me go Seto on you if you lose."
"That's a threat, isn't it?" asked Serenity, feeling a little bit better. "Bye Mai."
"Seeya," said Mai, flashing her a brief, two-finger salute, and flooring her car, sending her shooting out of the parking lot at excess ninety miles an hour, her usual cloud of policemen following close behind her. Serenity made a mental note never, ever to drive like Mai in her lifetime.
"Oh Lord!" cried an adorable voice behind her, as Serenity whirled around to see both ASV and Double S, both stricken at how exhausted Serenity looked.
"Your not going to play like that, are you Serenity?" asked Double S, worry obviously woven into his voice.
"I really have no choice guys…" said Serenity.
"And where are the others?" asked ASV indignantly. "Don't tell me your going to do this all alone!"
"Uh…no comment…" said Serenity.
"Did you get enough to eat today for breakfast? Do you need to sit down? Are you in some kind of trouble? Do you need us to do anything?" said Double S. Serenity was starting to think that they both sounded like a pair of elderly ladies, stopping their granddaughter from doing something they deemed 'much too dangerous for my little girl'.
"No, no, I'm fine, h-h-honest," said Serenity, which was very unconvincing, who was trying to stifle a huge yawn when she spoke.
"Oh, I'm not going to take that for an answer!" said ASV, grabbing her by the wrist and dragging her to the stadium. "You're going to relax, and your going to drink a nice, hot, white chocolate cocoa!"
"Let's get her some cinnamon swirls too!" said Double S cheerfully, grabbing her other wrist.
Serenity knew it was pointless to try to resist. There was no way that she was ever going to be able to fight the influence of the two adorable consciences-in-training.
---ooo---
"MUST RUN FAST! MUST RUN FAST! MUST RUN FAST!" screamed Joey at the top of his lungs as he ran through the highway at top speed, causing several cars to suddenly need to swerve to avoid hitting the screaming loony who was charging straight down the lane in a crazily weaving course to try to find his friends, screaming such things as 'MUST FIND SERENITY AND MAI!' and 'CASSEROLE!', causing several pile ups all along it. It would take someone superhuman to manage to make it through all this horror and devastation.
Well, actually, all it took was Mai.
"JOEY!" she screamed, managing to slow down to semi-normal speed to keep up with Joey, to great relief of all the police officers behind her. "What the heck are you doing out here?"
"GREETINGS FOXY CITIZEN!" yelled Joey, saluting heroically to Mai. "I am BUTT BOY, and-"
"GET YOUR BUTT IN THE CAR!" yelled Mai, grabbing him with one swift moment, throwing him in the passenger end of the car. With that, she sped up to one hundred miles per hour, turned the steering wheel so violently that she nearly snapped it off, and with a disgusting screech, she made her convertible, crash into the opposite lane in one of the most violent and speedy U-turns in the history of man. It was so violent that two cars behind her caught on fire due to the friction, and she literally had to ramp off the back of a car-carrying truck, which caused her to soar twenty feet in the air, over her confused police pursuers, and slamming down with the strength of two hundred pounds per square inch on the road, crushing it, and belting out from whence she came.
"Foxy Citizen!" said Joey, handing her the note and electronic to Mai. "I have a note from two citizens who said that your friend Serenity is being cheated by Pegasus!"
"Give me that," said Mai, reading and driving at the same time.
Mai and/or Serenity,
Pegasus is cheating. He rigged her harness, and douses her with electric shocks whenever he fears that she's going to lose. You have to take this breaker and activate it in the control room of this system, which is right under the stadium. You have to hurry. Don't worry about us, we'll be fine.
Sighned, Seto, WAIT! Uh…no, it's uh…RYO! YEAH, RYO! HE CARES ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS! NOT SETO AT ALL! THIS NOTE WAS WRITTEN BY RYO! REALLY! HONESTLY!
"Oh God, I have less time than I thought," said Mai, stuffing the note in her shirt, and slaming the gas so hard that she went even faster than she did before, defying the laws of physics. As you probably have guessed, no car insurance agency in all of Cuz is stupid enough to insure Mai anymore.
---ooo---
"It's no good Seto!" said Ryo sadly, clinging to the bars. "There's no way out of this…I'm all out of ideas!"
"Me too," said Seto. "Let's face it Ryo. This is the end. There's no other way to get around it. We're stuck in a cell, our life line is a complete moron running around in a pair of underwear, and we're stuck so far out of walking distance that there's no way we can get to the stadium in time even if we managed to escape."
"Then how did we get here so quick in the first place?" asked Ryo.
"Literary impossibility," said Seto, but before he could say another word, there was a scrape of metal against rock, as a huge grapple attached to a rope hooked itself on the barred window, as Ryo cried out in fright. However, he neediest not worry, for the head that poked up from the climbed rope was no other than.
"MS. FUZZY-KINS!" Ryo and Seto both cried happily, as the plush cat, this time dressed in black, burglar wear, pulled out a mini buzz saw, and began sawing the bars with a din-like bang of metal being hacked.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZR!
Ka-ching-ching-chihihihihihing!
Within a few moments, both bars rolled across the floor, and a passageway to freedom had been opened, Ms. Fuzzy-Kins waving for them to come down.
"Say thank you Ryo," said Seto.
"Thank you?" said Ryo, wondering why he was thanking a plush toy.
"Don't even say it, that's good enough for me," said Ms. Fuzzy-Kins to Seto, as Ryo began to climb down the rope, trying his best to forget that he was full-blown paralyzingly afraid of heights, who was followed by Seto, as they both made a grime decent from the third-story tower. Ryo was borderline crying, but he managed to hold it back, and Seto was trying his best not be happy that he was glad to see two people that annoyed him in one day, so the climb went with very little incident.
"I love you solid ground…" Ryo said, hugging the ground under his feet, glad not to be in a really high space anymore.
"Woo hoo," said Seto. "Okay, next problem. How the heck are we going to get to the stadium in time? We only have forty-five minutes before the game starts!"
"Fear not," said Ms. Fuzzy-Kins, pulling out a key on a ring, and pointing to a huge, metallic, mini-flying-saucer looking air vehicle. "I brought my CMWGAA standard issue hover car with me. And don't you get any ideas, I'm driving buster."
"Yeah, yeah, I know," said Seto.
"Do you always talk to plushies Seto?" Ryo asked.
---ooo---
"So your saying that this weirdo generator which controls the cheating thing is somewhere under the stadium?" asked Mai to Joey, who had just made it to the playing arena, and were now running from the parking lot to get there, due to the fact that they only had thirty minutes before the game started.
"YUP!" Joey said.
"Okay little brain, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET UNDER THE STADIUM?" asked Mai.
"Uuuuuuhhhhh…." Joey said.
"You forgot to ask where the entrance to under the stadium was?" Mai said darkly.
"YUP!" Joey said.
Mai just glared at him.
"I love you too," said Joey.
"I think I know how to settle this rather unfortunate situation," said Mai, taking out a wand, and turning a sign that showed the speed limit into a shovel, which caused every car on the road to gun it on the highway, now that they didn't need to abide by silly 'speed limits'.
"Start shoveling," said Mai, shoving the shovel into Joey's hands.
"SWEET!" screamed Joey, beginning to dig, which was one of his favorite things to do, aside from annoying people and destroying things and hurting himself and doing something really stupid.
A FEW MINUTES LATER
"We must make sure that the system is well guarded today," said one of the bunnies to a small squadron of flying, fuzzy bunny guards in the underground hallway leading to the generator where the inner mechanisms of Pegasus's system lie. "This is the most critical day of the tournament, and we must guard this hallway WITH OUR LIVES IF NESSESSARY!"
With that, almost all the bunnies turned away and began to go home.
"HEY! YOU GET BACK HERE!" said the commander. "DON'T FORGET THOSE TWO PICTURES I HAVE OF ALL OF YOU!"
"No one can prove that was me kissing that armadillo!" said one of the bunnies.
"Don't care, back, get back here! All of you!" said the bunny commander, as all the staff reluctantly walked back. "Oh come on! It's not like anyone's going to find this place! No one even knows that it exists!"
That's when Joey collapsed through the ceiling, pummeling downward, and landing quite hard on the bunny commander, unfortunately, not killing him.
"BUTT MAN TRIUMPHS!" screamed Joey.
"GET HIM!" screamed all of the bunnies in the hallway, pushing a huge red button that said 'Get a whole bunch of bunnies here to kick an unintelligent intruder's butt'. Joey took no hesitation of running off down the hallway as fast as he could.
The bunny commander was slowly getting to his feet to fight back, feeling all crushed and weak, and just as he took one step forward, he got crushed by Mai's spiked heel, who jumped down through the hole that Joey dug, who then sprinted down the hall after Joey, kicking a few bunnies in the nose who tried to resist her entry.
They had twenty minutes before the final game started.
---ooo---
"No one taught you how to land, huh?" asked Seto, who was standing three feet away from the smoldering rubble of the hovercraft, which Ms. Fuzzy-Kins decided to land, nose first, at sixty miles per hour straight down, on a 1972 antique Javelin in the parking lot, which was not only completely destroyed, it was now on fire.
"Shut up," said Ms. Fuzzy-Kins.
"Alright, all we have to do now is figure out where the entrance to the underground entrance is," said Ryo. "But it could be anywhere! Where the heck should we start?"
"MAYDAY, MAYDAY, BLONDE IDIOT AND GOOD WITCH MAKING WAY TO THE MAIN GENERATOR, REPEAT, BLONDE IDIOT AND GOOD WITCH MAKING WAY TO GENERATOR! CODE RED! CODE RED!" screamed two score army of flying, fuzzy bunnies, breezing past Seto and Ryo and charging off in the direction of the locker rooms.
"Boy, irony is sure on our side today," said Ryo. "Let's stop them!"
"Oh yeah," said Seto. "Let's try to beat off three dozen trained bunnies armed with glitter and health food and…the soft pillows…"
"Wait! That's it!" said Ryo, quickly shooting his hand into Seto's pocket, pulling out the 'Hello Kitty' whistle.
"NORYODON'T!" screamed Seto in panic, knowing what was coming next.
But it was too late. Ryo blew a long note into the silent whistle.
And from out of the sky flew the heroic-looking fifteen year old, wearing purple boots, a purple cape, a purple skirt, and midriff tee with a huge red heart with the words 'Yu-Gi-Oh Characters' in the center of it. She was followed by a few other girls, wearing basically the same outfit, except one had green instead of purple with 'Joey Wheeler/ Katsuya Jonouchi' in her heart, one had yellow instead of purple with 'Ryo Bakura' in her heart, and one had blue instead of purple with 'Seto Kaiba' in her heart.
"IN THE NAME OF JUSTICE, KINDNESS TO YU-GI-OH CHARACTERS, AND FRESH SALMON," said the heroic girl, landing with her comrades. "I am…FAN GIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL, together with JOEY FAN, RYO FAN, and SETO FAN, we are…THE FAN GIRL ARMY!"
"Yeah, yeah, great, now please can you help us?" asked Seto.
"Anything good fictional character!" said Fan Girl.
"Serenity's stuck in a DDR game with Pegasus, but he's cheating, and now Joey and Mai are stuck trying to dismantle the underground generator, and we're running out of time really fast before the game starts, and Serenity could lose and get hurt if we don't stop the flying, fuzzy bunnies from catching them!" said Ryo.
"Normally it's against our principles to conspire against Yu-Gi-Oh characters," said Fan Girl. "However, we reserve full right to trounce fuzzy bunnies! Which way did they go?"
"Follow us!" said Seto, as he and Ryo both ran to the locker rooms.
"ADVANCE!" said Fan Girl, as the other fan girls followed her.
"All for capturing them both and huggling them?" said Seto Fan.
"AYE!" said the other three.
---ooo---
Meanwhile, Joey and Mai were running down the hallway, trying there best to fight off the massive hoards of bunnies who got in their way. It was a long fight, and no matter how many bunnies they knocked down, more and more just came up, ready to fight to the death.
"STAY BACK YOU BLOODY RABBITS!" said Mai, using one fuzzy bunny to beat back the other ones that were jumping at her. "The main room can't be very far from here…it just can't…"
"Must…fight…off…bunnies…" said Joey, who was trying his best to mow through the fuzzy bunny army. But time was running short. Ten minutes to the final game.
---ooo---
"Alright men, ready to decent?" asked the fuzzy bunny general of the troops who were about to head down to capture Mai and Joey.
"You bet sir!" said one of the cadets. The army of fuzzy bunnies were standing outside of a door that was cleverly disguised as a gym coach in the locker room.
"They'll never survive this one," said the general, holding out a portable fruit launcher. "HQ's been developing these babies for weeks. Let's see those filthy primates stop this!"
"HALT MONSTROUS RODENTS!" said Fan Girly, turning a corner sharply into the locker room to face the army, her fan girl army making a sharp turn, so sharp that Ryo Fan nearly slid off her feet, and behind them were Seto, Ryo, and Ms. Fuzzy-Kins. "How dare you try to harm our favorite characters?"
"PREPARE TO SUFFER GRAVE AMOUNTS OF PERSONAL DISCOMFORT IN THE FORMS OF SLAPPING, KICKING, AND THE OCCATIONAL PINCH!" yelled Joey Fan.
"ATTAAAAAAAAAACK!" screamed Fan Girl.
---ooo---
"Thank you again for the cocoa and buns you guys," said Serenity to Double S and ASV, who already was starting to perk up with a warm, sugary meal in her stomach. "I feel a lot better already!"
"It was nothing!" said Double S.
"We just don't want you to keel over again," said ASV. "You took a real nose dive last time!"
"Yeah…" said Serenity.
"Hey Serenity," said Johney Roma, who had walked down to Serenity's bench where she normally sat with her team before the game started. "Just wanted to say best of luck to you today, we're all rooting for you. So don't lose, or else Mobster and me are going to lose fifty bucks."
"Okay!" said Serenity.
"Aren't communitarians supposed to be impartial?" asked Double S.
"Yes, but Mob Leaders can do whatever they like," said Johney.
"Guys! You're not going to believe this!" said Mobster, running up to the gang of Serenity supporters. "I just saw a whole army of flying, fuzzy bunnies head off to the locker room, followed by the British Person, the Not-a-British-Person, and a whole army of girls wearing midriffs and boots and capes that were flying!"
It didn't take a super genius to realize that Joey, Seto, and Ryo were in trouble.
"I've got to go help them!" said Serenity, about to run toward the locker room.
"No! You can't!" said ASV, grabbing Serenity by the shoulder. "The game starts in a couple minutes! What you need to do is stay here and win the game!"
"But the guys are in trouble!" said Serenity. "And knowing them, they're all going to do something stupid!"
"Mobster, do commentary for me!" said Johney, who started to run toward the locker rooms.
"Oh God, no!" said Mobster, realizing what he was about to do.
"Don't worry Serenity, they'll be fine, I promise!" said ASV. "You need to go and win this game!"
"This is the one you've been working so hard to win for so long now!" said Double S. "Come on Serenity! Do it for everyone!"
Serenity only nodded, and began to climb up the stairs to the platform. This was the day that her entire struggle in Cuz would be worth something more. This was the game that she had to win, for her friends, for Cuz, for herself, and for anyone who just watched the underdog climb up the stairs, with nothing to lose and everything to gain, with that last light of battle in her or his eye, who's entire view of life could be changed from a single space of time, with a silent hope for victory. And whether triumph or disaster would ensure, each would be a near crushing weight on either of the players' souls.
---ooo---
The battle of Fan Girls vs Fuzzy Bunnies ragged on, each fighting with tooth and nail, and fuzzy cotton tail. Actually, I just said that because it would rhyme. Still, it was a tough fight, each being top fighters with experience and skill behind their backs. And both loved to bite the other, as well as take long walks in the park under the sun. They are both currently single, and looking for a nice member of the opposite gender who loves kitties, cocoa, and a good book on a cold winter night like they do! If anyone in the audience is interested, pleas call 1-800-THIS-NUMBER-DOES-NOT-EXIST.
"Okay…weird…" said Seto.
"We've got them held off!" said Fan Girl to Seto and Ryo, who then swatted away a bunny in mid-air. "You have to go and find the others!"
"But we can't just-" Ryo started, but before he could say another word, a huge, blue, Honda Van bounced out of the parking lot, over the grass between the parking lot and the locker room, and amazingly, skidded to a stop next to Ryo and Seto, and before they could as why, they found themselves pulled into the backseat by Johney, as he slammed on the gas and careened into the secret passageway, as bunnies, in vain, tried to catch them.
"What the-" Seto started.
"Hang on," said Johney. "I'm going to see if this thing can still pull a 120."
---ooo---
"And welcome to day three of the Three Day DDR tournament!" Mobster said. "We all know the rules, and the fact that now Serenity's odds are 3,500 to one that she'll win today. BUT WE KNOW SHE'LL WIN! HOWL IF YOU THINK SHE'LL WIN!"
"Mobster! Impartial!" said ASV, who was also in the commentary box.
"Oh yeah, and ASV's subbing for dad," said Mobster. "But seriously, YOU'RE GOING DOWN PEGGY!"
"I don't know her, honest I don't; she just followed me here or something…" said ASV.
"May the best man win Serenity-girl!" said Pegasus.
"I agree…good luck…" said Serenity, getting strapped into the harness, oh so unaware of the danger that it held!
"Alright, best of luck to both of the competitors!" said ASV.
"BUT MOSTLY FOR SERENITY!" said Mobster.
"Good luck Serenity!" Double S called from the sidelines to Serenity.
But there was no time for additional cheers. 'The End of All Hope' (A/N I don't know if this is a DDR song or not), began playing on the sterio, and the match of the century began.
---ooo---
"There's no way we can fight all of them off," said Mai, who was backed into a wall with Joey, who were completely surrounded by flying, fuzzy bunnies, all armed with soft pillows and glitter, all begging to be used.
"I just wish we could have helped Serenity…" said Joey.
It truly looked like they were doomed, the bunnies all squeeking and quarreling who got to stab who. However, growing in the distance, there was the roar of a car being driven full speed down the hallway, and with cries of shock in panic, all the bunnies scattered in various directions as the van pulled up to Mai and Joey, who needed this so bad that it hurt.
"Need a ride?" asked Johney.
"MACADAMIA!" said Joey, jumping in the backseat on Seto's lap, while Mai took shotgun.
"GET OFF OF ME!" yelled Seto.
"TOOTH FAIRY!" said Joey.
"WHAT HAPPENED TO SETO?" asked Seto, as the car drove on.
---ooo---
No matter what, it seems like there's never as good a performance as the actual performance. A dancer may train for weeks, eventually feeling that he or she is still not ready for the performance, and find that opening night is one of his or her greatest dances they ever performed on stage. A band may feel that there's no way that they can play well for the concert, but on opening night, they shine.
Such is for Serenity, who felt like she was playing her best game yet, hitting every note, landing every step perfectly, doing everything without flaw, balancing her moves to the music, the arrows, and the cheers of the crowd. She just wished so much that the guys were here.
She felt like this was one of the best games of her lives. She thought calmly at the back of her mind, even if she won or lost this game, she'll always remember playing this good up to this point, after so recently being laid in bed for reasons she couldn't understand. She truly felt like something superhuman.
They were both as close to perfect as humanly possible. In all terms, their scores were completely even.
---ooo---
Johney slammed through the double doors that led to the generator room with his truck, causing a shock to the bunny who worked the machinery, waiting for the signal to activate the design and shock Serenity, winning the game for Pegasus.
Rules were strict when it came to such a piece of equipment. If anyone entered the room, activate the machine immediately.
---ooo---
Left, up, right, down, right, up, down, up, left, right, left-
Serenity was fighting on with everything she had. Feeling like she was fighting everything.
Then, the screen flashed green.
---ooo---
Everyone found themselves throwing their bodies out of the car and sprinting after the bunny, who was charging toward the switch, raising his paw as he was about to activate the button-
---ooo---
Serenity worked immediately. She grabbed her harness, spun around on it just like she did yesterday, gave a quick look at the screen, and threw herself at the side of the wall with all her dexterity.
Time froze.
She hit 'up'.
Then she spun around on the harness again, bouncing off the opposite wall.
With that, she nailed a combo.
She sprung to the floor, nailed two more steps, and stopped in front of the judges, never feeling more versatile in her life.
---ooo---
Before the bunny could push a single button, Joey and Seto had tackled him in near mid-air, throwing all three of them to the floor. Mai snatched the electronical device Joey dropped, who passed it to Ryo, who pressed it, causing the machine to shut down.
---ooo---
Serenity didn't look at the judges. She just sat there, her heart pulsing so hard she could have swore it was right next to her ear, wondering if she did everything right, and begging silently at the top of her lungs that she did.
Pegasus looked shocked. How come she wasn't down?
The judging was particularly long. All of them were quietly discussing their agreements and disagreements, trying to come to a decision on points, and just who won. Serenity felt like she was going to collapse from nerves.
And then, it seemed like everything came at once.
Serenity didn't know at that moment what made her happier. The fact that running straight from the locker rooms were Joey, Seto, Ryo, and Mai, all running straight toward her-
-or the fact that her score was 504, to Pegasus's 497.
She didn't bother having someone take off her harness. She ripped it off herself, throwing herself down the stairs full speed, screaming at the top of her lungs from sheer joy, barely thinking of what she was saying, and ran to the four, who could never be happier to see her, as the roar of the crowd of amazement at truly the greatest match any of them ever saw in their lives just came to a close.
And Serenity, getting congrats, pats on the back, and a full blown hug form Joey, she didn't care if she went blind or if she could see through walls when she got home. A minute of this euphoria could last any man a lifetime.
---ooo---
I've got nothing else to say guys. I'll update soon. I promise.
