The Saturn Adept

(Complete with boring title, unoriginal plot, and painful Mary Sue x Isaac action!)

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A/N:

Technically, Karst and Menny are dead by the end of GS2 (Sad, but true), but they're alive here. And Xanaeya and Co. exist, too. Loopholes! They come in handy! XD

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Jenna was very, very tempted to yell out, "OMFGWE'REDOOMED!"

But she restrained herself. Meanwhile, Sheba was standing still, staring up at the mushroom cloud that had appeared in the bright blue sky.

"We're dead." Jenna said instead and sighed, pressing the palm of her hand to her forehead.

"...Ditto." Sheba mumbled.

x x x x x

Meanwhile, up at the Fortress of Evil and Gloomy Things...

I mean, Alex's Headquarters...

Alex's Most Evil (Please don't hurt me) cat yowled as the ground lurched beneath them. Alex gripped the armrests of his chair, glaring up at the ceiling as though this sudden massive-shaking-of-Weyard was its fault. (And Alex personally though it was. Blame everyone and everything but him. He was too pretty.)

"I didn't mean to do that!" He told his kitty, who had scampered behind the throne in fright. "Besides, I can reverse it quite easily..."

The cat gave him a look that, were it translated into words, would say, "Yeah, right, pretty boy."

Alex rolled his eyes and held his hand out, summoning the power of the Golden Sun to him.

x x x x x

Despite Alex's Almighty Power, the rumbling continued. In fact, it grew so fierce that Jenna and Sheba fell to the ground, and were unable to get up. (Totally cliché earthquake! huffed the cynical mind.)

"If this is Isaac's fault, I'm so going to hang him with Xanaeya's hair!" Jenna yelled angrily, clutching to the grass with both hands.

"Who?" Sheba called back, being thrown around quite easily due to her small size. It must suck for her, what with her ties to Jupiter and all, Jenna thought.

"She's – " Jenna started, but the rumbling abruptly stopped. "...That was..."

"Weird..." Sheba finished for her, cautiously rising to her feet.

"Er..." Jenna was at a loss for words. Sheba seemed to be thinking the same for herself. But it was all rather suspicious...

There was a loud, high, feminine scream in the distance, and the two girls looked around wildly, trying to search it out. Experience had told them that if something screamed really loudly and shrilly, it was a good idea to find out where it was coming from, and duck. (Neither Garet nor Ivan ever recovered fully from the incident involving a raccoon stuck in an old boot.)

Something suddenly crashed into the ground at their feet so powerfully that even more soil, grass, and flowers were torn up than Sheba had managed to unearth earlier.

"...What?" Sheba and Jenna blinked as a girl, more or less their same age, slowly pulled herself up to her hands and knees. "Where...am I?"

Jenna couldn't restrain herself this time. "RUN FOR THE HILLS!" she yelled, turning on her heel and sprinting as fast as she could toward her home. After a moment of hesitance, Sheba followed as well, her Jupiter Adept-ness allowing her to easily catch up with the Mars Adept. That left the strange, teenaged girl where she had fallen.

"Where am I?" The girl asked herself, looking around. (She had apparently completely missed Jenna and Sheba's rather raucous departure. (1) "This is..." she glanced down at the ground, then blinked, noticing something. Heavy gold and silver rings were on her fingers, and several gold bangles and beaded bracelets adorned her arms. "Huh?" And then she noticed she was in completely different clothes than when she had been... "Oh crap."

Meanwhile, with Jenna and Sheba, who were still running in sheer, but reasonable, terror...

"Jenna! Stop!" Sheba yelled to the taller girl, her steps beginning to slow. She herself could run further and faster than the average person, being an Adept and a Jupiter one at that, but this was ridiculous! They had to have circled Vale at least twice by now... "Jenna!"

The Mars Adept promptly collapsed.

Well, no, that wasn't correct. As Sheba picked up her pace to help her fallen friend, she felt her toe catch on something, and nearly fell as well, but managed to spin her arms fast enough to regain her balance. Looking down at what Jenna had tripped over and what she nearly had fallen over herself, she found it was some sort of craggy white crystal...

"Urgh..." Jenna groaned, from beside her. Sheba turned her attention to her. "This is so not my...my...ugh..."

Sheba was silent, unsure as of how to answer. Her curiosity was piqued by that weird girl who had fallen out of the sky like a meteor and hit the ground and wasn't a broken, bloody mess. Sheba had fallen out of the sky, too, but definitely not quite like... that. And what was up with this rock? Sheba peered down at it.

"There's so many of them..." The redheaded Mars Adept said into her arms, which she had moved under her head. "They won't stop coming..."

"Huh?" She glanced up from the rock.

"Don't tell me you don't have perfect, pretty, intelligent, heart-stealing and mind-ensnaring girls running around Tolbi..."

"Perfect, pretty, intelligent, heart-stealing and mind-ensnaring?" Sheba repeated, her expression that of someone who had been giving a word problem with no details in it whatsoever. "Do you mean the harlots?"

"No! ...Though they might as well be..." Jenna sighed.

"Perfect, pretty..." Sheba ran the synonyms through her head again. "...No, there aren't any girls like that..."

Jenna muttered an obscenity into her pillowed arms, then grumbled to Sheba, "That isn't fair. Why does Vale get all of 'em, then?"

"Because Vale has more..." Sheba stopped to consider her words. Then she said, "...possible beginnings?"

Her companion gave a groan and pulled herself up to her knees. "Let's not go there, Sheba. That girl – "

"The one working for Alex?" Green eyes narrowed. "You shouldn't trust her, Jenna..."

"Well..." Jenna thought for a moment. Sheba had a point... But then... How did she even know about her? "Getting rid of these things require a load of chances, Sheba. For all you know, she might have... defected."

"From Alex's Mighty Evil Ranks? Yeah, right."

"...I can hear your capitals. It's scary."

One blonde eyebrow rose.. Jenna sighed, then got to her feet. "...Let's go back, Sheba."

As they went, Sheba asked, "What do you mean, capitals?"

"It's nothing. Never mind."

x x x x x

"Jenna, you're back!" was the first thing Jenna heard when she opened the door. Marie practically threw herself at the teenager, her eyes sparkling with happiness and her smile beaming brighter than the sun's rays.

"Uh, hi," Jenna said, forcing herself to not raise a hand and shield her eyes against the sunniness.

"Xanaeya's awake! She's asking for you!"

Great! Jenna's omnipresent cynical mind said exasperatedly. She's awake, and she still thinks you're her best friend!

"Where is she?" Jenna asked, looking past Marie's shoulder and seeing no girl in strange yellow garb with golden hair on the couch. (Say, how does that girl sneak around in bright yellow clothing anyways? the cynical mind asked, raising an eyebrow.)

"I moved her to your room, I thought she'd be more comfortable there." Marie said, hands clasped in front of her. Jenna blinked. "You don't mind, right?"

Wonderful. Now where do I get to sleep? Jenna thought sourly to herself. Instead of asking, she said to Marie, "Uh... Of course I don't! Ehm, I'll go see her now..." Jenna took a step to Marie's right, wanting to go relieve her eyes.

"Oh, who's this?" She stopped at hearing Marie's question. Of course she'd ask who Sheba was...

"Another friend. She... dropped by for a visit. She's from Tolbi." Jenna said, thinking quickly. Not much to do in Tolbi nowadays. Nothing really spectacular over there... And it would've been bad to say that she came from Lavilero, since Marie probably had more non-existent relatives over there, too. "Her name's Sheba."

"Sheba? What a nice name!" Marie squealed, walking over to the blonde. Sheba blinked at her.

"Um, thank you?" Sheba tried. Fortunately, it only made Marie all the happier. (Or was that a bad thing?) "And you're..."

"Marie. Marie Elouise Lorelei Theresa Jeanette Ilona Hope Fionulla Rowena Serena Katherine Audunell the second. (2)" She recited, ticking off the names on her fingers. Jenna stared at her, jaw hanging open, and Sheba's eyebrows had disappeared into her bangs.

"...Uh..." Sheba said, eyebrows yet to return to their normal position. "...You're...a princess, aren't you?"

"How do you know?" Marie asked, her expression that of excessively cute perplexity rather than bright, cheery happiness for once. (Thank Sol for little mercies, went the cynical mind.)

"Um, nobody I know has a name that long..." She said blankly.

"Really? Well, they probably aren't royalty – "

"That's nice and all, Marie, we'll be going now!" Jenna said, suddenly jerking back to life. She grabbed Sheba's wrist and yanked her along as she walked to her room. Marie, who was not deterred in the slightest, gave them both a beaming smile (Though neither of them saw it, having their backs turned to her), then went back into the kitchen.

"Mars," Jenna hissed, as she stomped over to her room. "So she did have a fancy-pancy princess name to go with her non-existent tiara!"

"Fionulla..." Sheba muttered to herself. "Fionulla..."

"Yeah, Fionulla," Jenna snarled, stopping abruptly outside of her room. Sheba bumped into her, and took a step quickly back, as though fearing she'd be backhanded. Jenna was unhappy enough as it was... "My arse, Fionulla."

Sheba blinked, surprised that she hadn't gotten backhanded after all.

Jenna kept herself from throwing the door open, but it wouldn't have mattered if she had anyway; Xanaeya was awake and sitting up in bed, reading one of Jenna's novels. As soon as the door opened, she set down the book and gave them a small smile.

"Hello, Jenna."

"Hey, Xanaeya," Jenna replied, pulling the chair from her desk out and sitting in it. Sheba followed her, trying to stare at Xanaeya without being noticed.

"Your friend..." Xanaeya said, looking at Sheba with now-pale green eyes.

"Her name is – "

"Sheba," Xanaeya said, cutting off Jenna. Jenna fishmouthed a second time. Sheba stared, her fear of getting hit with some sort of strange holy power or other forgotten.

"Do I want to know how you know my name without ever having met me in the past?" Sheba asked, suspicion obvious in her voice. Xanaeya laughed softly, brushing a strand of goldeny yellow hair behind her ear.

"You're quite famous, you know." The Saturn Adept told her, fingering a corner of the blanket.

"Oh?" Jenna noticed that Sheba's eyebrows were awfully bouncy today... "Famous? For being one of the eight famous Golden Adepts?"

"Aside from that, you're a remarkably bright young girl. I haven't heard of anybody as intelligent as you in a while."

"Don't try to flatter me, Ms. Xanaeya." Sheba's green eyes narrowed, glaring at Xanaeya's, which were steadily becoming a sort of aqua-ish color. "Most people don't thrive on it."

Xanaeya raised her own eyebrows, but she seemed more amused than offended. "Is that so? The Elders would have wanted to met you... But, sadly, they're gone. You would have pleased them with your intellect and...stubbornness."

Sheba blinked, thrown off by her strange comment. "Elders?"

"She's a Saturn Adept," Jenna butt in, before Xanaeya could bore their ears off with her angst-ridden past, and how she was enslaved and yadda yadda. (And at this point, just saying "She's a Saturn Adept" could really answer any question.)

"I am – was – an assassin. Isaac has taught me differently, though... There's more to this world than mindless bloodshed and vengeance. There are love, dreams, hopes, and our future..."

"Say, Xanaeya," Jenna said, one of her own eyebrows twitching violently. "What did you want to speak with me about?"

"Jenna... Would you like to see my old home?" Xanaeya asked, leaning forward slightly. Some gold hair slipped out from behind her ear. "In the forest nearby."

"Your old home?" Jenna blinked. She glanced at Sheba, who looked as though she were still puzzling about the existence of Saturn Adepts (as well as the name 'Fionulla').

"Yes... It's very beautiful, made in a large, enchanted tree." Xanaeya smiled fondly. "My parents had always told me I was skilled with my hands... Art, penmanship, woodcarving, swordsmanship..."

If Jenna had gagged, she expertly disguised it into a cough. Sheba slapped her on the back for good measure, though.

"Well, I..." Jenna caught Sheba staring at her out of the corner of her green eyes. "...I'd love to go sometime!" She said in a fake-uber happy voice she hoped sounded mildly like Marie's very-enthused own.

"Really, would you? You're the first person, aside from Isaac, who's seen it! I'm sure you'll like it," Xanaeya gushed, sounding more like a teenybopper schoolgirl rather than some cold-blooded assassin she claimed to be. "We'll go as soon as possible."

"And when is that?" Jenna asked warily.

"Ohhh... Now?" Xanaeya threw the covers off, swinging her legs off the bed. Jenna and Sheba stared.

"You're... not weak or anything?"

"No, not at all. Not only is Marie's soup very potent, but my body heals very rapidly." The assassin said in one of her informative tones. Jenna winced.

"I see... Uh, where's Isaac?"

"I sent him ahead to the tree, because I knew you'd accept."

So she's telepathic, too? What a LIAR! She isn't a Saturn Adept! She's a Jupiter Adept in disguise! screamed the cynical mind. Jenna had to agree, for once.

"Right. You get your stuff... Um, Sheba, why don't you come with me?" Not bothering with an answer, Jenna grabbed Sheba's wrist and forcefully dragged her out of the room as Xanaeya stood. "We'll meet you at the door..." Dare she chance it? "...'aeya!"

Xanaeya only beamed (in an eerily Marie-esque way) back at her.

Grimacing to herself as she tugged Sheba along the hallway, she wondered if she should tell Karst. Karst would probably say...

"What do you mean you're going to her home? Are you nuts? That's where she keeps her harem, right? How d'you know she doesn't have some sort of dungeons for her 'best friends,' too?"

...Something like that, nodded Jenna's cynical mind. She sighed.

After telling Marie where they would be going and getting a fresh batch of cookies for the short trip, the three girls began the trek out of Vale to Xanaeya's home.

Then they were ambushed.

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END CHAPTER SIX

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(1) – Notice how Sues tend to completely ignore certain things? Ugh. Or a character says something derogatory about another character, who so happens to be Ms. Sue's OMG-one-twu-wuv, and then the Sue backhands that "traitor" for saying bad stuff about her luv. (And she's never present when the character said that to begin with!)

(2) – Princesses must have princess-y names! All those names exist; they were ripped painfully from a baby name book from the eighties. And for those wishing to see more Azu!genius, Marie's last name is just a spiffed-up version of the boy name Audun, which means deserted/desolate/lonely. And Marie is orphaned, thus...

"'aeya" is pronounced 'aya,' like the guy from Weiss Kruez. I think it was Weiss Kruez. I dunno if that's how it's even pronounced (the name). Erm, if I'm wrong, it's the same as that exclamation Chinese parents like to abuse.

And as for the last sentence of the chapter?

All Sue stories end with a stupid, wannabe-cliffhanger sentence like that, duh. :P

Any further recommendations for Sues/Stus or weird plotholes are welcome with open arms. (Even Azu has to run out of ideas sometime.) And yes, a snappy goth Sue will be added sometime. As for that girl that fell out of the sky -- if you can't tell she's a self-insert!Sue, I'm going to spork you now.

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