Lingering Words
Mouche Avec Une Aile
K+
Disclaimer: If it looks familiar, odds are I don't own it. Meaning, SO3 isn't mine, never was mine, and most likely never will be.
Summery: He was in love with him. He just never had the courage to tell it to his face. (One sided FaytAlbel)
A/N: Right... I wrote this at 2300 on a Saturday while watching Stargate: SG1; Season One in French. (The only way to really enjoy it- ha-ha!)
This is dedicated to my BETA Ookami-Dono. Thank you so much!
"It's hard when the person you're in love with thinks of you as a child. It's even harder when you're not supposed to be in love with them anyways," Jacqui O
I love you.
Those three words lingered on his lips, but he'd never been able to say them. He didn't have the courage. Not that he'd have been taking seriously anyways. To him, he was just a kid, a child. And for some reason, that was almost as bad as being hated by him. His heart panged. He didn't want to admit it, but it was undeniable. It was beyond obvious that was how the older male felt about him. There was no reason to deny it. And yet... He cast a hopeful glance at the sleeping male, smiling slightly.
His brown-blonde bangs tickled against his nose, and his younger companion smiled, watching as he twitched his nose. Braving his gesture, he leaned over the gap between the beds and brushed the annoying bangs aside. His nose twitched once more, and he sneezed in his sleep. After that, he was silent. Carefully, he brushed his fingers across the older man's cheek in a feather light touch. He smiled. At first, his skin was cold, but as he rested the tips on his upper cheek bone he felt the warmth beneath.
It was weird, he decided. The brown-blonde haired male was freezing, and yet oddly warm at the same time. A soft smiled played across his lips and he rested his palm on the older male's cheek. His face was frozen, but as he expected it warmed up soon enough. He pulled his hand back, and climbed out of bed to kneel next to his older companion. He rolled over, kicking at the blanket that was tying his feet together. He resisted the urge to laugh.
"Albel..." he said softly, prying the male's fingers from the bed sheets.
For a moment, he looked so childish lying on his stomach. Lip turned up in a scowl, and eye brows furrowed in his sleep. His human fingers wrapped their way into the sheets once more, gripping them tightly while his other arm was tucked under the fluffy pillows. Every now and then he would kick at the blanket trapping his feet, grumbling slightly as he did so.
The blue haired male felt a pang in his heart again. He wanted so much to utter those three words and curl up next to Albel, but it would never happen. He knew better then to dream about something you couldn't have. It always ended up painful, in the end. And yet... This once, he felt like he deserved the chance to speak his mind. And as he watched Albel nuzzle his pillow as he finally managed to kick the offending blanket off, he decided now would be the best time.
Well, as best as it would get. He wasn't sure if he was ready to tell him to his face yet. Actually, now that he thought about it, he'd prefer just saying it this once would be enough to get it out of his system. He didn't exactly like waking up in the morning, mumbling the older male's name, or staring at him as they walked. And if he noticed, Albel never commented. Only in his wildest dreams would his companion love him back. He knew it was too much to ask for.
"Albel..." He said softly, stretching his arm out to entwine his fingers with the older males, "I..."
And his words faltered. He realized he couldn't say those three words no matter how much he wanted too. Because, in the end, there was still the overwhelming fear of dread hanging over him. The fear that Albel would hear, and he would be rejected. He swallowed deeply as he imagined those hate filled crimson eyes, and he wondered bitterly what he would say. Hard words would be one thing, true, but still... He found himself dreading the actions Albel might take more then anything.
He caressed his companion's thin fingers gently, watching them intently as they curled slightly under his touch. A soft smile played on his lips, and he traced his fingers around the others slowly. He didn't know why, but he couldn't help but find everything about Albel so... captivating. His graceful movements, and the way he folded his arms when irritated or bored- okay, well, most of the time. He looked at Albel's back, and brushed his fingertips over the smooth skin carefully.
He traced the edges of his clothes—the skirt thing he wore and the crinkled shirt that was curling due to his rolling around. Sighing, he ran his fingers down the older male's spine and felt Albel's entire body freeze under his touch. He stopped, casting a fear-filled toward Albel's top. His face was hidden in the pillow, but his breathing gave off that he was still fast asleep. Carefully, he stroked the male's spine, running his fingers up and down in a caressing way.
His cheeks flushed, and he looked down into his lap. He realized, no matter how many times he did this, it still didn't get him any closer to telling him. Hell, if anything it had the opposite effect. He wasn't sure how, but his mind was telling him it was. He cast a glance at Albel's face again, wondering how he could breathe through the pillow. He shrugged it off, and caressed the older male's spine once more. As he traced his fingers into the small of Albel's back he heard the male utter a soft moan.
To say he was startled wouldn't have been entirely accurate. One didn't associate moans (of either pain or enjoyment) with Albel the Wicked. It wasn't just out of character, it didn't even begin to make since. Still... He was quite please with himself for finding a way to create such a sound.
Despite the danger he was now in of Albel waking up, he continued caressing his spine. At this point in time, he didn't care anymore. He just wanted to do this now, because he wasn't sure he'd be able to drag the courage up to do it again. Albel squirmed under his caress, fingers squeezing his own tightly. A soft smile graced the blue haired youth's face as he watched. It wasn't out of discomfort, he noticed. It was more along the lines of... Well, he wasn't sure. Albel wiggled again and he laughed softly.
Yes, Albel was undoubtedly very childish in his current mode of wake.
His caresser made a noise of displeasure as Albel rolled over onto his back once more. But, it did cause him to blush a bright red as his arm was now stretched over his sleeping form, tightly clutched still in Albel's hand. Taking a deep breath to calm his nerve, he placed a palm on Albel's stomach and almost doubled back. He had expected it to be cold, like the rest of his body so he was beyond startled to find it warm as if a fire burned within. It was the only naturally warm part on his body. Well... The only warm part that he knew of- he little dared to touch anywhere else.
He rested the flat of his palm over Albel's belly button, before laying his head on the bed next to his side. He never realized how tired he was until now. It had to have something to do with the fact that he discovered how warm Albel's belly was. That was the only explanation he could come up with. Well, the only one that made since. Squeezing Albel's normal hand gently, he closed his eyes.
"Albel..." He whispered softly, "I... love you..."
His voice faded into the night, and the one who spoke was soon fast asleep.
