Disclaimer: I do not own any of the character names, save my own original creations. I do not wish to be compensated for this work, nor do I wish to infringe on any copyrights held by any stakeholders of the movie King Arthur. This work is an original creation, based on the legend of King Arthur and his knights.
Chapter 42: Pinning Hopes
Cerys ran her fingers over the book she placed on Brinn's bed, walked out the door and closed it quietly. She took Lancelot's hand and smiled sadly. It was quite a day for her. Brinn had moved out, Lancelot had moved in. Her life was forever changing.
She was very happy, even if she was not showing it right then.
"Alright?"
"He will be happy in that tiny little room. I'm just going to miss him." she said quietly.
"But you now have me to keep you company." Lancelot said impishly. "With all my armour and chests and weapons and tack..."
How he could make her smile so easily! Cerys rolled her eyes and pushed him away.
"We will need a storeroom just for your things alone! I have no idea how you fit into that tiny space with all those trunks."
Lancelot feigned hurt and they both laughed. She ran ahead of him then, her skirts held high, and he let out a surprise yell, sprinting to catch her easily around the waist. He picked her up, swinging her around. Nimli gave them a hello as she passed with an armload of laundry, and Cerys waved, laughing hard now, as Lancelot dragged her backwards by the waist.
"You two." Nimli smiled as she passed. Cerys stuck her tongue out and Lancelot winked. Happiness surrounded them. She wanted to share it with everyone!
Lancelot picked her up with one motion, sweeping her legs up into his arms. She threw her arms about his neck, and he strode away with her, his eyes sparkling mischievously.
"And where do you think you are taking me?" Cerys asked, attempting to be indignant. She laughed and ran fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck, pulling softly. He looked back to her and growled lowly. She had a good idea, but she wanted to tease him.
"I think you know."
Lancelot gritted his teeth and continued to walk back towards their room as she reached up and tickled his neck with her lips, pulling more with her fingers entwined in curls. Oh how much fun it was to instigate this with him! She revelled in it, feeling his muscles ripple as he fought the desire she knew she woke in him as he carried her.
He kicked open the door and strode in, setting her down. He stepped back to the door and slammed it shut.
Before he could turn around, she had grabbed at his arm, spinning him about, dragging him towards the cushions at the hearth. He was undoing the laces of his tunic as she backed up, towing him with her. Her eyes met his and she raised an eyebrow, biting her lip suggestively, her own free hand loosening her skirt belt.
"Such a vixen you have become." He teased as they both lowered themselves to the cushions. "I shall have to make sure I keep my eye on you."
She let out a giggle and she pushed him over, finishing the job he started on his tunic. He sat up again and put an arm to her waist, locking her to him. They stilled for just a moment as he looked into her eyes, a soft smile playing on his face. He made a happy sound in his throat, one arm around her, the other stretched out to the cushion to support him. He tilted his head as his eyes read hers, her hands on his chest. She tilted her head, and her smile mirrored his.
What was he thinking? She softened in his gaze. How she loved sharing herself with this man. How a part of her he was now.
"What?" She whispered.
"Nothing. Just taking a moment to look at you."
"And what do you see?" She asked back, teasing.
He kissed her then, and pulled her down fully onto the cushions, her happy laughter echoing out of the window into the air outside.
vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv
She was tracing a scar on his chest, watching the firelight play off his eyes. He lay on his back, head turned to watch her. The light behind her hair was highlighting her, and he brushed a bit away from her face. How he loved her hair. The softness in his fingers, the wildness of it when she danced, or after they made love.
"Do you think that Galahad and Dory will marry?" Cerys asked idly.
Lancelot thought on it a moment. "I don't know, he seems much taken with her. If he does, Gawain may need to find new lodgings. She lives in the women's quarters, no?"
Cerys nodded.
Marriage. It had been on his mind more for a few days. Arthur and he had spoken about it not long after he and Cerys had made it public that they were a couple, but he had put it out of his mind, until now.
Arthur had pulled him into the grain room in the stables as they were leaving on a ride three days after Arthur's announcement. He had looked a bit bashful, and Lancelot had assumed it was about Cerys.
"I'll not hurt her Arthur, you know that." He had said, wanting to relieve the man.
Arthur nodded and cleared his throat. "Well, I just wanted you to know that if you choose to, you have my blessing to marry."
Lancelot had furrowed his brow then and he and Arthur had stood silently as Lancelot had processed that bit of information. Marriage. It sounded very official for a love and a coupling he was still discovering for himself.
He had finally sighed, and the men clasped arms, nodding to one another.
"Thank you Arthur." was all he really could say. Arthur had smiled then, and they continued with their preparations.
Lancelot brought himself out of the thought and again looked to her. She had sat up to find the flask of wine they had brought over to the hearth, and was reaching for the cups. She turned to him again, and his heart leapt at her smile.
He really couldn't see himself ever loving another. She was such a part of him now; he loved sharing himself with her this way.
Marriage was a big step, but for some reason, the past few days had warmed him to the notion. Now that they were sharing rooms, it seemed to make more sense. His mind went to the hairpins still sitting hidden in one of his chests. He had not given them to her yet, for some reason. He had wanted the moment to be perfect.
This was it, he thought suddenly. He would give them to her now, and then he would...
He got up from the cushions and went over to one of the chests still sitting in the middle of the rooms. He opened it and rummaged through.
"What are you looking for?"
"You'll know in a moment." He replied, still moving things about, looking for the wrapped package. He had wrapped the pins in the linen roll that Cerys had given him, mint and all. It seemed proper, and he carried it out with him each time they rode. It was as if he took a part of her with him each time, and it was comforting to him.
He never mentioned it to any of the other knights, he knew it would be the source of much teasing if so. It had been enough that he was ribbed for days on taking so long to bed Cerys. He had been filled in on the fact that they had been waiting for years for him to finally do so. It made him feel very much the fool, and quite defensive about his love for her.
The only one not to tease him had been Tristan. But Lancelot knew why. Tristan had simply looked at him and said, "Don't hurt her." Tristan would never fear him hurting her, that was certain.
He had not waited to bed her; he had only realized he loved her. There was a difference! And now, he was about to make it permanent.
He found the small package at the bottom, the mint emanating off of it. He lifted it. Such a wonderful smell. He would never grow tired of burying his head into her neck and catching her scent. The mint gave him resolve. He turned and made his way back over to the cushions, sitting down beside her.
"There's already mint in this wine." She teased as she saw him with the roll. "I can't believe you would not have used all of it by now."
He chuckled and slowly unwrapped the roll. Both branches of mint were still there, much dried and cracked. He watched her eyes drop to his hands as she saw the pins, now sitting on the palm of his hands, on top of the mint. She put her cup down.
"These are for you." He said, suddenly nervous.
He watched her pick them up and turn them in her fingers; her lips parted slightly, her eyes darting over them. Gods! This was making him more nervous than when he would go into battle! He found his cup and took a long gulp. He needed some liquid courage right then.
"These... these are beautiful." She breathed.
She turned them in her hands more, and furrowed her brow, bringing the flat sides together. He caught his breath as she looked to the lion now staring out at her. Would she see the connection?
"Did you make these?" She asked, looking up at him. "This is your lion!"
He shook his head. He couldn't speak right then, his nerves were not allowing him to trust his voice.
She returned to them, and then she flipped them. Her eyes went wide, and her lips began to tremble as she brought the sides together. He could see tears coming to her eyes. His heart stopped. What had she seen to make her so upset?
"Love, what? I'm sorry..." He started, reaching a hand out to her.
Cerys shook her head and raised her eyes to him. "Where did you get these?"
He sighed. "They came from an old woman who was married to the armourer that was here when we were children. Do you remember him?"
She nodded. "Sabin. He was a dear old man. His wife was..." She ran a finger down over the cameo.
"Rhia."
"But that does not explain how..." she halted, her tears falling slowly, wistful as she rubbed the pins.
"How what?" He asked, worried now.
Cerys lifted the pins, the two brought together and the cameo facing him.
"That is my mother."
Lancelot registered shock on his face. He had seen Cerys, Arthur had seen Guinevere, Galahad believed it was Dory. Now, Cerys was seeing her mother. These pins, they were... He shook his head to clear his thoughts.
There was something bigger than any of them working here. He did not believe in such nonsense, but this was strange enough that it made him think about the possibility. It stood to reason that she would see a woman that she cared for too. If he ever got to talk to Rhia again, he would ask her what in the Gods names this meant.
"I believed it to be your likeness when Rhia gave them to me."
She smiled through her tears. "Really?"
"Yes. When I met Rhia, I asked her how your face would be there, when the pins were made by her husband, for her."
"She was a good friend to my mother. Didn't she and Sabin leave for the coast when he left the fort?"
"Yes."
"So you met her when you went on the coast run with Tristan." Cerys said, smoothing the pin in her hand, holding the two sides together and smiling now, her tears drying.
"I did." He replied. He held his breath. He didn't want to give anything more away. Tristan's sanctuary was not to be discussed, even with Cerys. He needed to change the subject, and he had a good idea how.
It was now or never, he thought.
Funny how this felt so familiar to the night he had told her he loved her. He drew a shaky breath and willed himself to keep calm. His heart was beating in his chest and he felt like he was beginning to sweat.
He took the pins from her hands gently.
He flipped the pins so the sides were together, and the engraving lined up. She watched him, her eyes curious.
"Can you read that?" he asked, holding the sides out for her to see.
Cerys squinted, her eyes moving over the text. She nodded then, blinking and then looking up to him once more. He could see the recognition in her eyes. She opened her mouth, then closed it, seeming to want to speak. She took a breath.
"Knight and Lover as One." She said so quietly, her eyes never leaving his face.
He folded the pins into his fist and reached for her then. He cupped her chin in his hand.
"Cerys, those words mean more to me than you know." He started, then clearing his throat again. "I love you."
She was darting her eyes back and forth across his, and he could see the love coming from her. He could see it! This was right. This was what he wanted more than anything in the world.
"I love you, Lancelot. These are truly a beautiful gift."
"I want..."
This was more difficult than he expected, and he stumbled on his words. He decided to just blurt it out.
"Marry me."
She stopped moving, her eyes now locked to his. A hand came out and made its way to her mouth, covering it. He could see it shaking. This was not a good sign. He couldn't look away from her, but he was beginning to wonder if he had upset her. He seemed good at doing that this evening.
"Cerys?" He ventured.
She dropped her hand from her mouth and very carefully took the hairpins from his hand. She wound her hair up into a knot and stuck them through, slowly poking and fiddling at the back of her head until she was happy they would not come loose. She dropped her hands and moved them to his, grasping them, lacing her fingers with them. He could see her thinking. She looked at him quizzically as he bent his head to catch her eye again.
Was this a yes? He wasn't sure. His heart was in his mouth, his hands shaking. He moved closer to her, tilting her chin. She looked up at him, a bright smile coming to her face.
"Cerys, please... say anything!" He pleaded with her.
"Yes." She said, a few tears falling as she smiled.
"Yes?"
"Yes."
Lancelot grabbed her up in an embrace and laughed. Yes! She said yes! She laughed then too, and then he kissed her, hard.
"Bloody Hells woman you take your time answering questions." He said as he stood, pulling her up with him.
She giggled and touched the hair pins. "I thought I had."
He laughed at that then too. She touched his cheek and they stood a moment more, holding each other. She broke from him, shivering at their nakedness, and no longer being by the fire.
"Let's go find something to eat. We also have to make an announcement." He said, wiggling his eyebrows. She nodded, patting his arm as she looked about the room for her discarded clothing.
As she turned away to reach for her underdress, he looked to the pins in her hair. He noticed that one side showed half a lion's face, the other, half of her cameo.
He realized that he finally understood both meanings in that inscription.
He had decided, from his long night by the fire thinking, that the words meant he needed to see the other side of himself in order to love her. He had finally seen both knight and lover.
Now he knew the other.
Dear Reader:
Do you see the other meaning?
I lived through the memory of the first time I was ever proposed to when I wrote this. Funny, that same night was the first time I ever felt a kiss in love, and I used that same memory for their kiss on the walls! I should post that piece I wrote up on my fictionpress account as my introductory posting.
Someday I really do hope to be proposed to again, and get married. It's hard, as a woman getting older, to see all her friends marry, have babies. They call it a biological clock. I think mine is ticking. But, I also know that I have miles to go before I can do those things in my life. When I am ready, I will take that step with my partner at my side.
Now is the perfect time for Lancelot and Cerys.
Thank you for keeping my muse flowing, and I hope that all the gifts in your life can give you meaning as does Cerys' hair pins.
Cardeia
