Chapter Eleven – Mixed Feelings
Gee can't sleep that night. Two events keep crossing over inside her mind: Vegeta kissing her tenderly and his enraged face when he raped her. She cries softly. Even though she doesn't want to admit it, she still has feelings for him, but she's too scared of him. 'It would never work.'
Why are you crying?
She startles back when she hears his voice.
"Vegeta? How…"
We bonded that night, even though it had nothing to do with love, he explains. Please stop crying. It hurts so much to feel your pain.
I didn't know you could feel that… She pauses.
You know that song I sang the other night?
How could I forget?
It's not about Vegeta-sei anymore. I can never erase what I did to you. Knowing that is worse than being in Hell.
Vegeta, I forgive you.
There's nothing but silence in her head. Then she hears his voice, very confused. What did you say?
I forgive you. You never meant to hurt me.
But… I took everything from you! You should hate me for what I did!
You gave me Trunks.
I wish he had been born for better reasons.
The results are the same. You've had you're punishment, Vegeta. Stop torturing yourself.
That'll take some time.
She feels how his presence fades away. Somehow, she's comforted by his remorse.
"Dad?"
Vegeta's meditating in the woods. He opens his eyes and looks at his son.
"Mom never told me what you actually did to her. Was it bad?"
Vegeta sighs. 'Kids! Why do they always have to ask questions I don't want to answer?'
"It was." He sees disappointment on Trunks's face. "I was deceived by an evil Magician who wanted to hurt your mother. It wasn't my fault and she forgave me for what I did, but I still feel sorry."
"Oh, but it's okay as long as you're sorry. Did you say you were sorry?"
"Of course."
"It'll be alright then!" He bounces off to play. Vegeta smiles. If only it was that simple.
What are you smiling about? Gee appears behind him.
"Kids. Life's so simple for them."
"It wasn't for you."
"Seems I am an exception to everything nowadays."
"Don't flatter yourself."
He turns his head to look at her.
"You look good, you know that?"
"I feel pretty good after our little nighttime conversation, yes."
Vegeta looks down at the ground. "But I can feel you're still scared of me."
"I can't help it."
"It hurts."
"I know," she whispers. She gently puts her hand on his shoulder. "Give it time."
"Patience never was a virtue among my people," he growls playfully. "But I know you're worth waiting for."
Trunks comes rushing down a tree and lands on Vegeta's stomach. "Let's play, dad!" He gets into a fighting stance and challenges Vegeta.
"You're going to be sorry for that, kid."
He gets to his feet and starts sparring with his son, purposely holding back his power, but still winning.
"I give up!" Trunks yells and runs to hide behind Gee.
"Protect me, mom."
"As if," she laughs. "You're on your own, Trunks."
Trunks runs off.
"He can't fly yet, can he?" Vegeta asks.
"No."
"I'll teach him soon."
Several weeks later Gee walks out of the kitchen after having done the dishes. She's so tired she can barely keep her eyes open. At times like these, she misses her magic powers. She turns around the corner and bumps into Vegeta, who knocks her off her feet. He catches her swiftly and pulls her close to him to make sure she won't lose her balance again. The moment seems to last forever and she looks up to his dark eyes.
Gee…
She closes her eyes and kisses him. His hand caresses her face while the other is around her waist, holding her tightly. Needless to say, it takes a while before Gee breaks free from his embrace. Tears run down her face. Thinking he scared her, he lets go of her and backs away.
Vegeta, stay with me tonight.
Are you sure?
I don't want to be alone.
He nods understandingly and follows her to her room. He lies down on his back and she curls up to him. He pulls up the covers, tucking her in.
I'm so afraid that I scare you whenever I touch you… or even look at you, he speaks inside her mind.
I know. Don't be afraid. We have a bond and I can't hide what I feel from your sharp senses. You'll know instantly when to leave me alone.
How come you're less scared now?
I've been watching you when you were together with Trunks. You're a good father, Vegeta. I guess my positive feelings for you are winning.
He gently kisses her forehead.
Go to sleep. I'll keep away the bedbugs.
She smiles and soon her breathing becomes deep and regular. Vegeta strokes her hair and studies her face.
"You're beautiful," he whispers. He enjoys the warmth of her body until his eyelids become heavy and he drifts off to sleep as well.
